Circle back to me when you get at least a few years under your belt with a successful marriage and I will for sure take your opinion into consideration.....
xoxoScarlet
I would not be able to share my hobby with my SO (and, not sure that I would want to). But, short of that, I believe that for a hobbyist, I have the perfect SO.
She is self-absorbed enough to not be too concerned about how I spend my time when I am out of her sight (e.g. She is at work). She is technically challenged enough that she'd have no interest/wouldn't know how to dig through my phone apps or browser history (even though I take extensive measures to obscure my activities there). And, so long as everything gets paid on time, she has no interest in overseeing the finances, so money set aside for "hobbies" does not raise any questions.
Am I missing anything?
My Father always told me whatever you’re not doing at home she’s getting somewhere else. If you’re going through this much trouble trying to cover your tracks, do you assume her needs are not being met sexually?
Married people lie to each other. I don’t idolize your marriage & I do not think you have an almost perfect SO. To each their own. The perfect SO to me is one you can be 100% honest without hiding caca. 💩 I believe most wives are happy with the bills being paid no sex needed.
And there's no chance you'll bring home an STI?
If you did and infected her, be prepared to see the SHTF.
Stay safe out there!
Is she a good cook.. A buddy of mine is an excellent cook. Really amazing. If he didn't have a career in finance / banking, he could be a chef in a restaurant. His old lady... Well lets put it this way.. I have had better food at Taco Bell..
Dusting, mopping, cleaning, laundry, dishes all might seem small things, but a good wife approaches these seemingly menial tasks with grace and without voicing any complaints.
Never married, but my graceful approach to handling cleaning is to hire a professional cleaning service.
I don’t know many couples where the “good wife” stays home and takes care of the house these days.
Why not.. !!!
Depending on your situation, it wouldn't be bad for a woman to take care of household chores along with raising kids herself. Day care costs $350-400 per week per child. That's about $1400-$1600 per month per child. . If you are making anywhere under $100K, most of your paycheck is going to be get wiped out. And what did you achieve.. Nothing.. Kids were raised by someone else. Oh you think little Jimmy wants someone to play with and grow up together so you end up having one more kid.. Well.. multiply that by 2.
Now on top of that you add cleaning service and help to do household chores. That's gonna cost you -. $400-600.. Now you are in debt..
No wonder Americans are living paycheck to paycheck and kids are all fucked up in their heads.. At the age that we used to go to the malls, they are out in their basements playing stupid video games and dealing with chronic depression.. They wake up one day, and do what.. They get an AR15 and blow up the school.. Kids are fucked up because parents are fucked up..
OK Now.. If you are a really high earner with both husband and wife making very strong 6 figure salaries, then I can approve of outsourcing some of the stuff out to professional services.. But better keep close eye on them kids.. Make sure they are not doing wrong things... Monitor their social media like a hawk..
-- Modified on 2/12/2025 12:06:10 PM
Not arguing the merits of raising one’s own kids, as a single mom I struggled to parent while working in a demanding career and to ensure I was teaching my values while sometimes competing with schools and daycares.
I do find it interesting that you assume the woman must be the one who would stay home. It simply shows an old school thought process that may not make sense for many now.
For many couples now women may be the higher earners, or have less flexibility in their careers than men. In these cases it’s just logical to suggest that the man would stay home and handle the childcare and household responsibilities if someone was to do so, no?
People should do what suits them.. I am not going to debate what is good for the society and what's not, because that's an unwinnable argument. - just like pretty much any argument is unwinnable - hence I don't argue.
If a woman makes a shit ton of money, and wants to find an effeminate man, who wants to take care of the household, so be it. I say knock yourself out. There are a lot of women like that.. One of them is actually my client right now. I haven't heard a beep from the "man" and his old lady made more than $300K last year. He is probably shopping for a new Tutu on Temu. LOL.. That kind of lifestyle ain't for me.. That's not a husband.. That's an obedient pet masquerading as a man as far as I am concerned.
Again, if it works for you, knock yourself out..
Also, you say old school - as if it's some kind of a pejorative. Let me ask you.. How does something end up becoming old school? Let me give you the answer.. Maybe not always, but a lot of times it is something that gets tried and tested for hundreds if not thousands of years and we know it works more than it doesn't.
-- Modified on 2/13/2025 10:44:37 AM
Ms. Temptation,
I looked at your reviews and photos on-line and would like to respectfully offer my services as your professional cleaner. I will do windows and your lawn will be flawless. Services will be available 24/7.
I'll be able to meet your massage and pedicure requirement after some on-the-job-training.
ATTB
Please send your references and compensation expectations - lol!!
I am flattered, thank you.
Compensation expectation is $0.00.
What a great fantasy!
You’re absolutely correct. ☑️ Anyone who cooks & cleans is a good SO. I cook & clean daily. Gourmet meals it’s ridiculous because I can cook it makes me a critic. Lol 😆 No wants a lazy SO in, or outside of the bedroom. Having a team player is a bonus.
Definitely agree !!
It's about time that schools incorporate these, otherwise considered inferior chores, in their curricula. I am totally not against women getting good education. A smart, educated mother can raise great kids. But if they don't want to have a STEM (Science, Technology, Engineering, Mathematics) degree which is what you need today to get a well paying job, then no harm in learning how to cook and clean and be a good wife.
Absolutely great if women can become engineers, doctors, go to the moon, physicists, and even Commander in Chief. I can't wait to call our future President, Madam President, but nothing wrong in them being a good housewife either.. And if they haven't had good upbringing at home, where these skills were passed down from mother, why not acquire them.
-- Modified on 2/12/2025 1:31:31 PM
My guess is your answer to the question: "What do you do if the dishwasher stops working," is.....
"Hit her."
LOL.
Not if she is willing to hand wash them till it gets fixed... 
You seem to have missed the finer point of inicky's comment.
Not if she is willing to hand wash them till it gets fixed...
There was no other finer point as far as i am concerned.
This is how I read inicky's post.
Not if she is willing to hand wash them till it gets fixed...
Over time, he developed a strong compulsion to put his penis in the pickle slicer.
Finally, he gave in to his urges and did so.
He got caught, got fired, and went home despondently.
His wife said, "Why so glum? What's wrong?"
"I got fired for putting my penis in the pickle slicer at work." he confessed.
His wife was in shock and asked, "Are you OK? Pickle slicer?! What about the pickle slicer?"
Donald said, "She got fired too."
(rim shot)
.
.
"What do you do if the dishwasher stops working,"?
"Hit her."
(rim shot)
I really had to stretch my imagination to see it from your POV....
You really have way too much time on your hands don't you.. LOL
-- Modified on 2/13/2025 8:51:48 AM
Keep on thinking that and soon or later you’ll let your guard down and then she’ll jump on you.
Don’t be fooled ….SO know more then you think. Woman have the sense about their man. They know…. They just know.
This guy is smart !!! He is right..
This guy fucks !!
If i wanted someone that can cook and clean, ill hire a maid.
I prefer someone that i have the same mindset as. I dont have to worry about them running up cc bills or making dumb big spontaneous purchases. They know what our end game is and how we are going to make it there.
I like having someone that can raise our children with grace and respect. Not having to worry about passing bad cycles onto the kids or worry about them filling thier minds with bs.
I like having someone that doesnt need me in their presence every possible moment. Its nice to tell your so to go out and have fun with friends. And its even nicer when they return the favor. I dont like needy. When a couple is completely co dedendant on each other its hard to stomach.
Now, id love to be able to share that i love me some hookers....but we cant always get exactly what we want.
If she was really perfect, you wouldn't need to pay other women for sex. I'm not saying there is anything wrong with her not being perfect, especially if she is meeting other needs that you value. But just call it what it is.
Lets dissect that for a second...
You do realize that there are men on this board that need lot of variety and no single woman, no matter how accommodating, can satisfy them. I don't know OP, and can't talk about him, but I won't be surprised that he is one of those guys.
I never been in relationship more than a month or so... So I have no idea what it is like to be in LTR let alone be married.. Does it get boring after a while fucking the same broad? I don't know.. Maybe it does.
-- Modified on 2/12/2025 1:51:29 PM
I think it's more of a want than a need. A need suggests they are controlled by their desires. IMO, that's weakness. Married men who don't cheat have desires too. They just choose to control them.
I'm not saying it's wrong to want and have such desires. Nor is it wrong to act on them. If that's the choice a man makes, fine. But the real perfect woman in this case would be one who is on board with an open relationship and/or swinging. If he has to lie to her and/or she's just not one to figure it out, there's a constant possibility she will somehow find out and the marriage will fall apart, and possibly in a very ugly way. Any cheating man who is getting away with it might think he's got a good thing until he no longer is getting away with it. In an instant, his world can fall to pieces.
If variety is more important than commitment, an open marriage or not getting married are really the best options. If a cheating man is getting away with it, regardless of how he is, she's not perfect for him.
But honestly, I do get why men end up in this situation. It's one thing to talk about the perfect situation. It's an entirely different thing to actually end up in one. Men get married, love their wives, don't want to lose their wives, but want to sleep with other women all of time. And despite the risk, they choose to cheat. It's an imperfect reality and comes with no guarantees it will last.
Show me the most "perfect" woman and ill show you a guy that is tired of sex with her.
A relationship is more than just sex.
Of course it's more than just sex. But sex is still a part of it. If the guy is tired of sex with just her, and chooses to get some elsewhere, she is no longer perfect. She may be great in many other ways. But if she is not okay with him getting sex elsewhere, and he does so anyway, there is now a flaw in the relationship. Is it still perfect if she catches him, divorces him, and takes half of his money? Or is it only perfect until he gets caught? IMO, perfect is not having to worry about getting caught.
Most wives don't give a shit as long as the neighbors don't know and your ugly mug does not show up in the paper. Don't get too cocky and you should be golden.
I don't know what world you live in.. If anything most wives care about is what their man is up to.. Unless the marriage is already over (whether its legally over or not).. A lot of wives are hovering over their husbands like a helicopter.
As a grown woman your statement is simply appalling.
I had to read it multiple times just to make sure I wasn't misreading it.
-- Modified on 2/12/2025 7:34:26 PM
You are not married. LOL
Don't need to be. Got plenty of friends, cousins, relatives who are married..
Just need to be aware of what's going on in the world and be observant. Critical thinking, or even basic thinking also helps..
Remember Scarlett, marriage is the number 1 cause of divorce in America!
for the decline in blowjobs for husbands. Lol
I’ve heard that. Apparently that’s why brides have that big glowing smile walking out of the church knowing they’ve sucked their last cock. 🥸
of success is unmistakable, and the dopey grin on the husband's face shows he doesn't have a clue what's coming, or to be more precise, what's NOT cumming. Lol
Q. How do you get a Jewish-Americn Princess to stop fucking?
A. Marry her.
Or:
Q: What do you call a Jewish-American Princess's nipples?
A: The tip of the iceberg!
OK.. Someone explain to me.. Why y'all said Jewish-American instead of just Jewish.. Are they a tad bit different than regular run of the mill Jewish women - say from.. Israel or elsewhere? What does American have to do with them being Diva - which is I think what you are trying to get at humorously.
a Jewish-American Princess. If you do, no other explanation is necessary. I dated a few in college. I found out later my Jewish friends were pranking me by setting me up with the worst ones. I'll give you a short synopsis. If anyone thinks I'm wrong, tell me. Spoiled by their parents in just about every way imaginable, snarky, pushy, bitchy, and when it comes to sex, you feel like they are passing out ammunition at the Alamo (make every shot count, boys, because there's never going to be enough to call it a "win" - Lol).
It's a uniquely American package, nothing like young European Jewish women, who are a lot more cultured and classier.
I have never really dated anyone more than a month.. If you know anything about me, I can't stand being around people for too long.. I derive most of my energy from doing things myself - like taking vacations by myself, going to concerts or stand up shows by myself, reading (I am avid reader), going to baseball games by myself.
At this point in my life, women are just a piece of meat I rent to satisfy my prurient desires..
After I cum, I have no desire for any social interaction w/ them. Mild doses of banter are fine (preferably over text) but I have a limit of about 20 texts a day.. Anything beyond that is too much..
Thanks for providing the insight. That was quite interesting to know Jewish American women are raised differently than Jewish women.. I wonder how that fits in the Indian / South Asian culture..
-- Modified on 2/20/2025 10:20:38 AM
For me, I went to school with a lot of Jewish ladies in the 60s and 70s, and that's what they were called, Jewish American Princesses. It stuck with me. No ulterior motive, just learned behavior.
"Ward, don't you think you were a little hard on the Beaver last night?"
I think most wives do give a shit because they may be looking for an out anyway. At least after a certain amount of time. Very few love their husband the same 7+ years in as they did when they got married. All of those bad habits come out. Looks fade. The courting fades. He does less romantic things. The list of why goes on. But as long as he's a good person, she may struggle to leave him. Catching him cheating is her out.
Now, if she truly does still love him a lot, and she feel he brings a lot to the relationship, you may be accurate. If they have a good thing, she may rather not lose it and doesn't want a reason to lose it. I find these relationships are less common. Not absurbly rare, but maybe somewhere in the 1/3 or 1/4 range. (I just pulled these fractions out of my ass, so I could be off.)
A few things come to mind, in response to your question:
A. Does she love you (and do you love her)?
B. Do you trust each other?
C. Do you love each other and trust each other enough to allow each other to explore sex with others, under some mutually-agreed ground rules, should you choose to do so?
I love my SO (and, I appreciate the paradox in that claim)
We are intimate regularly and I enjoy it. And, she says that she does.
She's not my slave. Together, we make sure that our house functions.
I have a higher sex appetite than she does (or, she ever has).
I didn't say "I have the perfect SO", period. I said "for a hobbyist".
Not a paradox at all. Love and sex are *not* the same. I am married. We are in an open marriage (obviously!). We are open and honest and always use protection to keep the other person safe. It is about honestly, not about the sex. It is ridiculous that we still live in a society that expects you to be with one person and one person only that is supposed to fill every need you may have in life, sexual or otherwise. Unrealistic and a set up for failure.
Love and Sex are not the same for you.. You are in an open marriage. The whole world is not.. You are open and honest (and good for you both), the whole world is not ...
The percentage of people who are OK with the other partner having sex outside of the marriage, is very... very.. .very.. small portion of the society. Most of the world still believes in more traditional approach to life where you are permitted to have sex within the confines of marriage.
Trying to make a blanket statement that everyone in the world should be in an open marriage, or accepting of it, is what is more ridiculous.
Do what you want to do. Live the life the way you want to live and what suits you best, but expecting that the world will conform to your world-view is definitely setting up for your own personal failure and disappointment.
-- Modified on 2/16/2025 11:48:23 AM
Circle back to me when you get at least a few years under your belt with a successful marriage and I will for sure take your opinion into consideration.....
xoxo
Scarlet
What does me being unmarried has to do with me telling you that what you are doing is imposing your world view on rest of the world.. And you have no business doing it..
I thought "Live and Let Live" was the cornerstone of Libertarian ideology..
Talk is cheap, right? :
xoxo Back at ya !!
Your accusation is baseless..
Scarlet is simply stating that she has a lovely life in an open marriage. What the hell does it matter if the rest of the world doesn't approve?
She has every right to express that here.
No where do I see her telling the rest of us that we have to follow her example.
For the record, I also have an open marriage, and I think your assertion that only a tiny fraction of people would approve is without merit. I think most people, while eschewing this practice don't really care too much if other people do. To the extent that it does bother them, it's probably jealousy.
Also, when you point the finger at people for trying to impose their view on us, take a look at where the other three fingers are pointing.
Conan likes.
Gesundheit!
She is not simply stating that she is an open marriage.
Here is what I have issue with..
'It is ridiculous that we still live in a society that expects you to be with one person and one person only that is supposed to fill every need you may have in life, sexual or otherwise. Unrealistic and a set up for failure.
BTW, FWIW.. I don't consider having sex with prostitutes, and not just as a one time thing, where it can be excused as a poor decision, but hundreds of time over the period of 20+ yrs as socially acceptable behavior either. That's why when I go to business meetings, or have cookout with my cousins I don't brag about it.. Is society more liberal now that it was 50 or even 20 yrs ago.. Yes.. But we are maybe decades removed in America where prostitution and open marriage can be considered normal behavior.
I have no problem with her open marriage, or yours for that matter. Good for both of you if it works for both of you.
-- Modified on 2/16/2025 8:13:13 PM
She stated an opinion. Nowhere did she say she expects everyone to agree with let alone conform to her opinion.
Don’t you ever view certain behaviors as being ridiculous, yet you don’t go around telling everyone they must conform to your world view, which is different from theirs?
If one finger is pointing at u, the other fingers are pointing at v and (u x v).
Edit: Oops. Corrected the wrong cross product typo.
-- Modified on 2/16/2025 8:30:32 PM
Well, taking the thumb to *be* a finger for the sake of the argument, are you saying that there is a lot of blame to go around as many different people are pointed at in this situation?
If I am Current with the situation, the Force of your argument has Induced me to agree and to point out that the pinky finger and ring finger are pointing to some people standing behind and to the side of the hand model in the above image.
Well, taking the thumb to *be* a finger for the sake of the argument, are you saying that there is a lot of blame to go around as many different people are pointed at in this situation?
I had not noticed that in the image but find it quite shocking that one can so easily deflect with a slight bend of the wrist.
Lol.
Anyway...
I'm with Scarlet here. Theres a lot of social stigma about polygamy and stuff like that. It's a lot worse for women too. Men are viewed as "playboys" while women viewed as "whores" is a giant double standard in how people view it.
If the whole cared less what's socially acceptable a lot of people's lives would be better and have less stress
Am seeing she has a lack of negatives from you point of view. But I dont really see you noting positives in your relationship.
Very honest & proud statement. I like to think I am a tomahawk, or bone in ribeye 🤠 lol
We are all so very different & that’s life. I prefer to never share my time with anyone who shares this same opinion. Great post. Thanks for sharing.
a "bone-in" until the customer gets there. Lol