Ok, so I've been doing this for awhile, but I've always wondered about the following question.

I'm not what would be considered an attractive man.  My hair is abandoning my head and repopulating other areas of my body, such as my back and ears.  (I'm limited in the amount of shaving/waxing I can do, due to my SO).  I don't have a big belly, but I do have love handles.  I'm not a young man anymore.

I know in real life, that the beautiful women who treat me so great and make me feel so happy as providers, would totally ignore me.  So my question is to providers:  

How do you do what you do, and act like the man you are with is the most awesome man in the world, when that man is someone who is physically repugnant to you?

I can say this.

I was a little naive when I started out in this adventure almost five years ago when I was 48.

I pictured most of my clients would look like Richard Gere from Pretty Woman.

Of course all my dates don't look like Richard Gere or John GQ.

I treat each of my dates like he is a King.

How do I do this?

I don't look at their "Flaws" ie: weight, hairiness. I go for the jugular.

I am interested in pleasing them. Everyone has desires and wants to be desired. The guys I have had dates with that were "Teddy Bears" I treat just like an ATF. They come to me and I take their body, a blank canvas and paint a masterpiece.

In the beginning I was unsure. The first time I had a fella who was over 300 lbs..I was nervous. I didn't want to show it...or any disappointment. I understand he has needs. He wants hands and breasts all over him just like John GQ.
One thing for sure.
Honesty is the best policy. I realized early on that some info was not forthcoming from these big guys. I would rather know up front what I am in for. So NOW..I always ask age, wt and ht. I do not refuse big guys but I now know in advance what I might expect. I think big guys might feel like gals won't date them because of their size...so they don't tell. Many people, ladies included, fudge their weight. So I guess many people are uncomfortable at times with their own skin. It's my job to make them feel on top of the world. And I can do it without acting.

Why? Because I understand. And I actually am a great date for a big guy because I have so much flexibility, I can spin and I take that oh so sexy blindfold and take them to a place that is so sensual.

Sometimes I think guys with size or physical blemishes don't choose a date with me because they think I am too petite or too pretty. I always tell guys I am just a normal girl. Oh for sure I am SEXY, but I am not gorgeous or beautiful or any way intimidating.

I am pretty and caring and loving and SEXY and here to please you and make you feel like a KING.

love

Sexy Carolina


-- Modified on 7/27/2008 4:58:41 AM

Hi - I find your remarks very interesting.  Let me share something of my experience from the other side of the mattress.  I am 6'2 and currently weigh 290lbs.  I have a 52" chest and lift over 50,000lbs a week. I cannot walk straight through many of the typical interior doors due to the width of my shoulders.  Since I have retired from the US Navy I have gone from a 38" waist (at less than 6% body fat) to a 44.  In "fighting trim" I weighed 255lbs.  So I am a huge guy but not your typical huge guy.  I also have a great deal of mostly gray body hair.  I have numerous scars from service in 12 combat campaigns (5 awards of the Purple Heart) and a few from 4 months spent as a
prisoner of war in Viet Nam.  OTOH, I am well groomed (including my crank) and clean, I can't bring myself to think I'm handsome but I have nicely greying hair and a silver mustache and goatee. I take care of my skin. And perhaps most importantly, I'm a nice guy.  All of this being said, I have NEVER noticed a hesitant or fearful reaction from a provider in the US, Asia or Europe.   Perhaps the level of interest I show in a lady, my relationship skills and the sexual skills picked up carousing around the world "outweigh" any of my cosmetic negatives.  I've had quite a few ladies including providers tell me that they prefer an older man with a bit of a belly and skills, even if he shows some wear and tear and is a bit cosmetically challenged.  And my regulars are always glad to see me!  Also, let's be honest, I've never met a provider who is perfect or flawless physically.  I guess I'm a realist - I should be - I would have a hard time listing all of the countries I've hobbied in, let alone all of the ladies - but still - physical perfection has never been on my list of requirements for the ladies.  If it was, I would have missed almost all of the best experiences
I've had...  In the civvie world, I have found that I have no trouble at all picking up attractive women for low rent rendevous.
But I have found that, if one were to categorize amateur ladies in attractiveness strata, the
2nd and 3rd tier ladies have provided almost all of the top notch experiences I've had. I have never been turned off by discovering that a lady had a surgery scar, obvious signs of motherhood, or any of the physical imperfections or signs of wear and tear that are normal and expected.
I've never minded being with an older lady that had aged gracefully.  If I'm interested in the lady, these things don't bother me at all.  The only things that will turn me off to a lady are poor grooming or hygiene, obvious poor self image, or self absorption.  So, in the real world, and within certain limits, just how important is physical appearance, and why do so many obsess over it?

I find the men who consider themselves attractive, treat me badly..Attitude is EVERYTHING...Make me your queen, and you WILL be king....

Everyone needs loving in their time, and just because they have a big belly, or hair hanging out their ears doesn't mean they don't deserve it.

The only think I ask with the larger of the gents I meet is PLEASE please be clean when we meet.

Another thing, is just because someone is good-looking doesn't make them good in the sack. MANY of my guests are either obese, older, and no Richard Gere look-a-like, but they have the knowledge, stamina, and gentleness you wouldn't find anywhere else.
Repugnant doesn't come into it for me. I look past the exterior to the interior. If I were not able to do that...I wouldn't be able to do this.

xoxo
Lusty

I always find things I love about all of my clients if they are kind & considerate..

Maybe us "mature" provider's are a different breed, better in lots of ways...

"I know in real life, that the beautiful women who treat me so great and make me feel so happy as providers, would totally ignore me.  So my question is to providers:  

How do you do what you do, and act like the man you are with is the most awesome man in the world, when that man is someone who is physically repugnant to you?"



 Lets look at this from another perspective..
When you were younger and your future ex GFs  unkempt,unattractive obese mother said she would give you 300 bucks to do her in the laundry room while your GF was taking a shower ... Would you??
           I would have and I would have acted like I loved her if thats what she wanted for  300.

I have not been with anyone who was physically repugnant to me!

I also date nerdy guys in real life & often wish I had met some of my clients some other way...quite a few i would totally date.

The money helps but more so for the reason that I truly am appreciative that they make my lifestyle possible & keep me in cute shoes, lol!

"I have not been with anyone who was physically repugnant to me!"

If she was physically repugnant thats another deal .. I said when I was young I would have done my future ex GFS unkempt,unattractive, obese mother for 300 and acted like I loved her..
I have honor and pride and if she is physically repugnant I would have a 500 minimum.

I find there is something attractive in nearly everyone..personality has always gone further with me than just looks alone.

I've read the responses, but I'm still wondering: how do providers actually bring themselves to have "time and companionship" with men they're not attracted to?  According to Darwin's theory, women are driven to seek out men with best genes (i.e. the alpha males), so just how easy or difficult is it to overcome all that?  Is it mostly the envelope on the dresser?  Compartmentalizing work and real life?  Something else?  It's is not a joke or a trick question; I like to read about psychology behind everyday life, so I really am curious about this.

I know for a fact that the great ladies I met in the hobby would flat-out reject me if I approached them in a nightclub.  In the hobby, I experience a complete 180 of that.  I'm sure that providers can and do enjoy their client's company; I'm just wondering how they get over the attraction factor.

Darwin's therory is about attraction to reproduce not fornicate as the 2 are extremely different!
My personal take on it:

1. if a person says they can find something attractive in anyone, then they are getting over nothing in order to this..

2. nightclubs are hardly a true standard in gearing anyone..even using Darwins theory.
Places like that are always based in the world of shallow plastic coupling that are usually just for bragging rights after sobering up. Hopefully!
LOL!

3.True while the enevleope is at first the driving force, it is not the only one, and i have found I like more of my working experiences than not..

4. Attraction: maybe that is the difference between a GFE experience and going thru the motions experience

Darwin had no idea of the significance of his theory of evolution by natural selection, nor of the significance of these birds.

See the wikipedia article;

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/darwin's_finches

Paragraph's 2 & 3 under Darwin's theory gives me my premise: "A series of ground finches which are so peculiar as to form an entirely new group, containing 12 species"

I actually met a provider who has worked regularly on the Galapagos islands teaching diving, and who also answered me the question asked here.....she is a variety of finch as are all provider's .....but what does that make us???)

Hi - FWIW, it's been my experience in life, my military career, and 35 years of hobbying all around the world - that no theory of personality works in contact with real life. Humans are unique, we have the capacity to shape and create ourselves. We are not machines. Unlike the birds, many if not most of us are not slaves to appearances....

Cheers -

gregory

WELL TAWNEY u are not a ugly woman really.....some guys view females in this line of work as "MEAT".BUT 2 be honest i dont or could i ever treat a woman any way other than a woman.....but how many guys have ever been with a woman of your looks?why do you think most guys see providers anyway?most of them just have low self esteem if they treat you wrong

Someone can be as big as a house but still have beautifully elliquent statements come out of their mouths that it makes me more comfortable.
The fact that I soooo love the art helps a lot too. A gentle touch or a smooth caress means so much when your trying to put a smile on their faces.
I look in their eyes, and see a need...which brings out the animal in me. LOL

xoxo
Lusty

What's not to adore about a body, a being, a miraculous life form standing in front of you... offering of themselves, opening and trusting and looking for my attentions?

It starts right there.

Then the eyes, a soft word, the feel of heat under my fingertips...

Seriously, I can enjoy having sex with inanimate toys/objects.  Other people are so much easier to connect with and to deeply enjoy.

.02