being 60+, i can only be empathetic, but I use cancellations as an opportunity to show a woman that I really want to see, how much I really want to see her. And it's not because I'm so coy. No, most of the woman here can smell bullshit before you finish your second sentence.
So, while not answering your question per se about why 45, perhaps my post can give you some insight into how to ACT 45. lol You know, overcoming an obstacle. Just like IRL
Instead of challenging her, I try something respectful and creative, hoping to reach the woman in her. Znd no, im not always successful. Escorts are women first and not machines. They have lives, get sick, have families and just bad days that don't intersect with our availability. And yes, it does suck, but when it works out, you feel like you know a bit about each other and that's usually a very good thing. Many (most?) appreciate your patience and perserverence, but not by being a nuisance. You may find they are actually looking forward to meeting with you.
As for a big dick, I was with someone very tight for the 3rd time the other night who commented on my largess, asking me if any escort EVER did not see me again because of my cock size. After some thought, I told her I can't say say it has happened. But size doesn't matter for man providers. What I wouldn't give for a smaller dick, more DT and less teeth! Sometimes.
You know, they say 50 is the new 40. How young are you and how young do you look and act? (HINT?) And btw, if you're under 45 and have ED from watching TOO much porn, then you watch TOO MUCH porn! Find a hooker! Oh? Christ, they make drugs for ED, don't they?
There are plenty of guys here that are quite successful with more experience and money than me, that can make suggestions in fewer words. Not my strong suit .... 😕 Hope this helps even if you have to wait until your 45