Strother Martin
Cool Hand Luke
but in my family it happens all the time.
Badabing!
I haven't posted here in a while, but I have to rant a little bit after the experience I went through tonight. I've been following this board for years,
you can check all the reviews I've posted in the past.( Just so no one thinks I'm a newbie here.) Anyway, I had set up an appt. with Gemini Starr during her visit here. I e-mailed her a week and a half prior to her visit to set up an appt., filled out her form and was all set for a 10pm appt. tonight. This was my first time seeing her (or so I hoped!) so I followed all her instructions to the T. I was really looking forward to meeting her. I spoke with her this morning and moved our appt. up to 7pm. I called her at 5pm and she said 8pm would be better. Then I was running late and called her at 7:45p
and told her I'd arrive at 8:15p. She said ok, call me when I get to the hotel. I arrived at 8:15p and called, no answer, left vm. I repeately called her and she wasnt picking up. So I figured I go check out the bar. When I walked in I saw her sitting at the bar working some other guy. Since I haven't met her before I wasnt sure it was her, but It definetly looked like the girl in the pics. I even went up to them and said "Excuse me are you Gem?" She said no, and I apologized. Then after ordering my drink I decided to call Gemini again. Low and behold I could see Gemini's purse on the bar with her phone inside it. The light on her phone was lighting up as it rang on my phone. I called twice to make sure. She was totally working this other guy and not even paying attention to her phone! To say the least I was pissed! Especially after reading some of her posts on some of the threads below, about how she perfers advanced appts. (which I had) Gemini don't get all high and mighty on yourself! Based on all the other favorable reviews on her I'm sure she does provide an excellent service.
But if your going to treat this like a business, then act professionally and have the courtesey of honoring your appts! I understand that if you have a chance to make more money, then let me know. But don't post messages (as below) how you perfer setting up things in advanced. I say another flakey provider because she kind of reminds me of my old ATF, who started doing the same things as Gemini. (This is another story in itself)
All I can say that after this experience Gemini is rude and inconsiderate!
She lied to my face and had me jump through hoops to set up an appt. that never happened! I know that this may sound a bit vindictive, but I thought this would be something to let the rest of you guys know.
She's just another Flakey __ore!
Ok---Yes we had a 10pm appointment that evening and yes you called me in the morning to see if we could change it. I gladly obliged to your request which was 7pm. You then called me around 5:30pm and said you were going to have trouble making it around 7 and YOU (MIGHT I STRESS YOU) asked me if we could move it to 7:30pm. I said why don't we make it 8PM! You said fine. You then called me again at I believe 7:47pm and said you would be late around 8:15pm. I said that is fine call me when you get here. I decided to have a drink as I am hyper-active and a bit claustrophobic especially in those small rooms in NY. You did not leave a message at 8:15 as I have saved all the messages (including the mean ones). You coming up to me I felt was out of line as discretion with my stage name is a must. I felt that my safety and anonymity had been compromised as I am very discreet and I do not think anyone would answer to that especially being in the hotel bar that they are staying at. How do you think it looks if you say my name in a full bar and I am known as someone else. Red Flag----not good! especially when I am talking to people that do not know what my occupation is. I have had 2 stalkers in less than 2 yrs in this business. Although I am wild in the bedroom I have dignity and respect and am cautious. Especially when I had to move rooms there because someone below in which I will post under after this. He called as was supposed to also in the am but he also called 45 minutes early wanting the room # I told him when he called that I had already told him to call 5 minutes before the appointment as I do not give my room # out that early due to previous stalking incidences. He finally got the room # and cancelled. So now I have someone who I am scared is another stalker and have to make up a story to the hotel to try and change rooms. I have no idea what he looks like and can just come up to me at the hotel or whatever as he now has my location and room #. If I do not change rooms he can also seeing as I do not know him either hurt me or come by and just knock on my door if I was busy with someone. Yes he did also call 15minutes early also and tried again that is when I probably had an attitude because I had told him 3 times to call when he got here. There could of been a better way to handle this such as maybe send me a drink and tell the bartender your name and I would of came over which would of been more respectful and gentlemanly. Not come up and ask me if it is me when I am being discreet and mingling with people. After all your time changes I was very much thinking you were going to do it again or not show up. The bar was load with alot of people around me. You have to think with the big head and be discreet. Also after that nasty message I have saved on my phone when I checked it I would not call you back. Yes I was upset as my name was used. And I do not let people know who I am as it is not safe and I am very secretive and safe for all of our safety. Flakey---lets see ----hmmm how many times did I try to accomodate you when you kept changing times? Thank God I was dead and had cancellations and no-shows and was able to try and accomodate you. I actually paid you guys this trip as I went in the negative. But I will not compromise my safety and am not greedy. If I would of said yes to your ? of who I am then that would look a little bad as the peopl around me know my real name. Not Gemini and Gemini is not a name people name there kids. Sorry but it is called discretion. Sorry I did not hear the phone. But you did not leave me a message at 8:15 I have 2 nasty ones at 8:47 and another one later in which if you are that disrespectful. Then you are not a gentleman. Safety and discretion comes first! It helps keep all of us safe! the big D decided I had an unpleasant attitude so not to honor our appointment since you decided to leave a nasty voice mail after agreeing upon 8pm and then due to your lateness then at 8:15 and then you leave a nasty voicee mail at 8:47. Why would I honor your appointment if your tone in the vm is nasty and threatening and scared me and you approached me and compromised my safety in an unprofessional manner by not thinking with the big head and were not concerned of my safety and discretion. I am sure with the approach you made no ladie with dignity and respect for herself would of honored your time. Remember my safety and discretion are the most important thing to me!
If I missed something let me know!
Love,
Gemini
-- Modified on 9/25/2004 7:04:51 AM
Smart. I dont blame you for being cautious in this day and age. No foul that I can see here as a first date should be prompt on both sides. When things go to hell as they did here, the whole landscape changes. When I meet Gem the first time, I wont reschedule. First impressions can sink you
I would never see a client after he had gone up to me in a bar using my stage name either.
Gemini - in response, I did call at 8:15pm. I also left you a page with my number. As far as this stalking thing, I had no idea about this situation. Also, if you had told me that you didn't want to wait for me in your room you should have said so when I changed from 8p to 8:15p. (I don't think 15min. is that much of a difference) Yes, you are right, I might of handled the situation differently when I saw you at the bar. But please understand my point of view.
We had a standing appt. and I arrived and called you at the time we agreed upon. After trying to reach you several times then seeing you sitting at the bar with your legs wrapped around another guy, well I think I have a right to be upset. I dont think I compromised your saftey at all by approaching you. I was very discreet about it, the only ones who heard me were you and the guy you were sitting with. There was no one else that was sitting in ear shot. As far as nasty vm's, I had a pissed off tone, but I did not curse, in fact I remember saying that I was going to be a gentleman and not use foul language. Also I left this message after I left the bar, A half hour after our appt. was scheduled!
This whole stiuation could have been avoided if you picked up your phone and spoke with me. I did call at 8:15pm! Even if I didn't use your name when I approached you, it seemed like you weren't going to acknowledge me anyway.
Speaking of dignity and respect, i think I was very respectful until you decided to blow me off, then lied to my face when I approached you. Have a little dignity, you knew we had an appt. and you were the one who decieded to not answer your phone. I am very respectful of people and expect the same respect and consideration in return. By you not picking up your phone to let me know you were not going to be in your room is inconsiderarte and rude.
First you said you left a voice mail at 8:15 now you say you left a page at 8:15. So which one is it? I rest my case!
Readers please read the original post and compare!
Thank you I am done with this drama!
I hope everyone has a wonderful day and a better week!
Love,
Gemini
Sounds like a disaster but these things do happen some times right?
His side:
He had a chaotic work day with a lot of schedule changes. Thinking he was doing the right thing, he called her every time there was a time shift. He probably should have anticipated the continued changes and let her know he needed flexibility. When all is said and done with his day he's ready to relax and expects that all will fall into place due to his meticulous calling and planning.
Her side:
She's invested in a room to accomodate friends. Stress ensues after spending cash on a room, dealing with the bummer of slow business, flakey callers, cancellations and no-shows. This guy seems like another one to her. Forced to deal with it (due to not having any other appointments) she accommodates and rearranges until she's fed up. She resigns herself to a night of nothing-ness and heads out for some personal time.
His side:
He's arrived and he can't find her. He calls but probably not when she expected him to. This adds to the many annoyances of his day.
Her side:
She's now at the bar enjoying the company of a stranger and letting off some steam. (I personally doubt she was working another guy to go upstairs. She was probably being flirted with and was flirting back as we girls do). – He calls but not when she expected him to. This adds to the many annoyances of her day.
His & Her Side:
He continues to call and call. He's already there and his blood is starting to boil. He probably does approach her - pissed. Her blood boils after he calls her out by her stage name. She ignores him - pissed. Next come his nasty voicemail messages, her retrieval of the messages and in turn, her own angry reaction. The result? Disaster.
They both obviously endured their own horrors due to the misunderstanding. Unfortunately (really!!) sometimes the best of intentions end up going awry. Chalk another one up to human miscommunication and move forward!
Thanks Laney!
I think it always helps to have a non-objective opinion.
You make alot of sense.
Peace,
Spikenyc
I have known Gem for nearly eight months. I know we all have our ups and downs, but as far as this thing is concerned, all and everyone, to a person, has spoken highly of Gem, both in and out fo the Hobby. She is respectful, discreet, naturally sweet (not fake), accomodating, fair, superb in her performance, and damn sexy.
Now, we all have weeks from hell. I think certain cities bring that out. I think with the rash of no-shows, and her prior stalking issue, you have to take that into consideration.
But this post brings to mind a couple of unwritten rules that we sometimes forget:
Never, ever, approach a provider in public and use her provider name unless she is expecting to meet you. Just bad form. I once bumped into a provider I knew at an airport, and the eye contact alone was enough to cut steel. But, by NOT approaching her, and confirming later, I was elevated to elite (smart and aware) status. Translation=benefits.
Never approach a provider who is on a date at a social function to talk about biz. You have to use your street smarts on this one, but if the lady is hanging on the arm of a guy for a good part of the time, well, you gotta figure that one out.
Time is money. If the time doesn't work for you, take a pass, and hope for a return. This isn't like taking your Mercedes to the car wash. It involves a little more than a stop-and-get-groceries mentality. If that's the way you think about it, then no one wants to hear your tale of woe about the store being closed, cuz it just wasn't that important to you to begin with. Put the time into it that you want back out of it.
Lastly, I know nutty providers. Gem isn't a flaky provider.
And back to the weeks from Hell. Imagine you were on your job, which involves entertaining ugly, sometimes fat, mostly annoying, bitchy women day and night, and making them happy, even though some of them make you hurl chunks. Imagine you hide this job from friend and family, for security puposes. And imagine that your income depended upon these women, so you gotta suck it up. Then you get a rash of no-shows, and you see a few particularly fugly and annoying women in one week, and you just want a break from them. Then you get the scheduler from hell. Then that scheduler shows up in public and says "aren't you 'Joe Big Di*k'?".
I'm embellishing here, but if you're not aware of these facts, and this perspective, then you probably have to work out some issues by paying $50 per hour and laying back on the couch and talking.
SMTM
PS:
For the record, for any wise a** about to post the standard 'alias' rebuttal, I refuse to go with my old monniker, but I've had more reviews, drank more beer, been to more countries, yadda yadda....so can that reply before ya start it. It dont fly, boy. I dont need to prove a m f thing to no one. I just know my friends, and I can smell someone who likes to start stuff.
-- Modified on 9/25/2004 10:50:16 AM
SMTM - First off I'm not trying to start stuff. I use this board as a resource and just tried to let others be aware of what could or shouldn't happen.
"Now, we all have weeks from hell. I think certain cities bring that out. I think with the rash of no-shows, and her prior stalking issue, you have to take that into consideration."
I was not at all aware of her situations, if she had let me know, then yes, I would have taken it into consideration.
" But this post brings to mind a couple of unwritten rules that we sometimes forget:
Never, ever, approach a provider in public and use her provider name unless she is expecting to meet you."
I think I approached her in a sublte, discreet manner. Also I did have a standing appt. . I don't think your anaology of "the scheduler from hell" of me is correct.
I only changed our time twice, and she made it sound like it was better for her anyway.
Believe me - all Gemini had to do to avert this whole situation was simply call me back and tell me she wasn't comfortable with all the time changes and had a bad experience previously. I would have understood.
SMTM - I'm not try to prove a m-fing thing to anyone. I think this board is a great resource for those of us in the "hobby", and by letting others be aware of what happened, is only adding to the reliability & credibility of these boards.
Best regards,
Spikenyc
Spike:
I respect you as a poster and skilled hobbyist. But you are simply wrong here my friend. I know kind of what you are going through. But I am telling you from someone on the outside looking in that you are wrong and you should apologize. Her first priority is to protect her safety. No matter how discreet you think you were, it spooked her. Look man, I know you are a good guy. Just back up and look at it dispassionately.
Spike, you might not agree with this but here me out. We hobbyist are out here to get one thing. And if we have a little sense about us we can protect our physical safety very easily. But these ladies have to deal not only with the cream of the crop but the insidious under belly of the hobby population.
They range from the fairly benign lonely, desperate guy that might call, email or IM too much to the psychodic sociopaths that can spell real, genuine physical danger. I can see how your situation spiraled out of control. And to be perfectly honest, it never occurred to me that their would be anything wrong with approaching her as you did in the bar. But after reading her response, I am happy to learn from your mistake.
The bottom line is that you know her but she has no idea who you are. Put yourself in her place for a moment. Your indiscretion was a violation. Add to that the fluxiation in your schedule (and I have been in precisely the same situation), and try to understand the number of bull manure calls and no shows ladies like gemini starr gets and it is pretty easy to see her point.
Now that you have had a time to step away from the situation, I think you can see her point if you are willing. I saw nothing wrong with your original post. It was completely from your perspective. But once you read her response and you see that none of the "facts" are in dispute you should be able to easily see her perspective.
The bottom line here is that you made a mistake and now you owe her an apology. That's my two cents based on what you both have written. No flame here. I can see how this started. But be a man and admit you were wrong.
Hey spike you owe her nothing. Don't apologize. Those are the chances she takes with the employment she chose.
What a kind and sensative attitude. You are right... saying you are sorry for a miscommunication between an outstanding hobbyist and an excellent provider makes no sense. Let it fester or make it worse. Honestly. Do you here yourself? How would you feel if someone took that attitude with you if you felt your physical safety was threatened? There is nothing flaky about being careful.
Toast and all others following this thread.
Thank you all for your comments & advice. I have considered all the different perspectives and point of views. My reaction is this. I disagree -
No, I don't think that I owe Gemini an apology. I gave her my personal information (which she could use against me if she wanted to) and i followed all her instructions for meeting her. Changing appt. times is not a reason to think that I am a stalker or sociopath. I called her at the time we agreed on (I did call at 8:15p) and she decided not to pick-up. As far as the way I approached her in the bar - I think I had a right to, especially when she knew I had a standing appt. If she was so concerned about her saftey, then my advice to her is that she shouldn't be hanging out in the bar of the hotel where she is staying (or working), especially when she knew that she had set up an appt. at that time.
This is the business she choose for herself to be in and she should accept that time changes are part of the business. I don't know why some of you guys kiss these girls asses so much. Who's paying here?! Now don't get me wrong, if a lady acts like a lady, I'll treat her like one - If a lady acts like a _ _ ore, then she'll be treated like a _ _ ore! Bottom line is this - in this "hobby" or any business for that matter, its a two-way street and it has to work both ways. So a little dignity, respect and consideration should be shared on both sides.
Peace,
Spikenyc
I also know I do not have a corner and what is right. Your point is an accurate and well grounded response to your experience. I personally think on a different day under different circumstances you both would have had a marvelous time.
Your decision is justly yours and I respect it... just as I do your posts and reviews. Stay safe my friend.
Strother Martin
Cool Hand Luke
but in my family it happens all the time.
Badabing!