Kudos to Thirsty for staying out of the A/R thread and letting it play out. A few thoughts:
I met A/R over a year ago when she was posting on CL occasionally as a "non-pro." It was a remarkable experience, mostly because of the time off the clock we spent talking about her life. IMO, this girl is beautiful and very bright; she is also, however, quite intense, and nowhere near as psychologically stable as she believes herself to be. When she started on the TER board, I was genuinely surprised by the notion that A/R thought she could ever be a regular provider given her personality, and I think my instinct has been proven correct. My advice to A/R is to get a couple of generous boyfriends who will be sympathetic to her highs and lows. But by all means retire; this career is not for her.
BTW, this ain't about performance. Santino is right. When A/R is in a good mood, she is a fantastic person to spend time with.
Finally, while I wish A/R the best, I must join the chorus to blast her for even suggesting that she would give out personal info. Anyone who even suggests taking such action should IMO be banned from TER.
However, I did not prevent her from responding to the thread. As I often write, it is not my responsibility to protect posters from themselves.
The thread in question should serve as a lesson to all providers/agencies. Never get into a back and forth argument on the boards. I always suggest to make one reply post and then walk away. Even if the provider/agency feels that they are 100% justified in their position, trading shots only makes you look bad. It doesn't take long for people to tune you out. In my experience, far too many providers/agencies don't understand the importance of their online image. They just don't get it!
Personally, I wouldn't want to see her or any provider banned due to a thread like that. We learn a lot about providers from their posts. We certainly learned a lot about A/R. I hope that if she does retire as she indicated (wasn't clear if that meant from providing or from the board), it's not because of that one thread. I've never met her, never talked to, so I don't know what's ultimately the best thing for her. I only wish her the best in whatever path she decides to pursue.
People mention banning a lot on this board. I just want to make it clear that TER moderators don't have the ability or authority to ban members. Only once did I ask Staff to ban a member because of his repeated pattern of stalking providers in multiple cities.
This provider has not been banned. She has been moderated on all TER discussion boards which means that the board moderator must read and approve her posts. You know me...I approve almost anything but revealing personal information is never okay.
My angry reaction to the thread yesterday was way out of line. I mis-spoke when I wrote that I would put out someones personal information. It was not ok for the person that posted my real name on this board but it was worse to respond in such a way. I would never give out personal information. I was very upset, hurt, and angry to find myself getting bashed and not knowing why I was being attacked. I do agree that I have not had the best track record with appointments. Especially the last couple of months will all of my personal issues happening. You are all correct. This is not a place I belong. Nor a "profession" I should be in. I am writing this because I do feel that I should apologize. I am sorry for my poor reaction to the comments and the entire thread.
really could have been one of the top indies whithin a short period. Altho I have never seen her(Not for the lack of trying. She broke one appt with me.) we have spoken many times an pm ed each other. I found her to be erotic and charming. I am sad to see her go,
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