There was a young man from Ghent,
Whose cock was so long it was bent,
To save himself trouble,
He shoved it in double,
And instead of coming,
He went!!

There once was a man from Westphalia
Who went on a wild bacchanalia
He buggered a dog
Two goats and a frog
And a bishop in fullest regalia

There once was a man from Peru,
Who fell asleep in his canoe.
He stroked on his penis,
While dreaming of Venus,
And woke up with a handful of goo.

There once was a fellow O'Doole
Who found little red spots on his tool
His Doctor a cynic
said Get out of me clinic,
And wipe off that lipstick you fool!

I heard this long ago and forgot the ending.

There once was a girl from Aberistwythe
Took her grain to the mill to make grist with.
But the miller's son, Jack,
Threw her flat on her back,
And united the things that they pistwyth.

A pansy who lived in Khartoum
Took a lesbian up to his room,
And they argued all night
As to who had the right
To do what, and with which, and to whom.

There was a young man from Brighton
Who thought he'd at last found a tight 'un.  
He said, "Oh my love,
It fits like a glove."
Said she, "But you're not in the right 'un."

There once was a girl named Lass
Who refused any cock up her ass
But when the money got tight
She couldn't stand the fight
And now she's a provider with class!

There once was a girl named Lass
Who refused any cock up her ass
But when the money got tight
She couldn't stand the fight
And now she's a provider with class!