Washington DC

thats too bad
pm2000 1470 reads
posted
1 / 32

So I am new to this "HOBBY", haven't seen a provider new.  I don't have preferences as far as race goes but as most I have body type preferences.  I noticed in several ads "no black men" or "no black men under 30.  I am a over 35 and a Professional Executive type and I am African American.  Anything to this?  I have my thoughts but figure,why guess.  Ladies what do I need to know about this?  Please save me some time frustration or even embarrassment.

LongDuckDing 850 reads
posted
2 / 32

I believe this has much to do with endowment and for fear of being robbed by a bunch of thugs. Yes it does suck to be put in that category but i'm guessing their fear of being unsafe trumps anyone else's feelings of how unfair this may be.

OldTraveler 40 Reviews 1025 reads
posted
3 / 32

First, it does exist and it is usually (though not 100%) intended to keep away the gangsta types.  For many the age is the biggest issue.

I would suggest:
(1) join a screening service such as P411 or DC
(2) contact the lady through the service, write a few paragraphs about yourself, including age, and just sell yourself as a good, solid person interested in seeing her
(3) establish a rapport, and do not lie but do not volunteer until after she seems to be comfortable with you
(4) if after that she declines, it would not have gone well anyway.  And her loss.

kendradc2011 See my TER Reviews 966 reads
posted
4 / 32
wifefucker 1011 reads
posted
5 / 32

Sometimes it's the Anglo Saxon BF or husband who tells her not to see black men .

BeautywithBrains See my TER Reviews 707 reads
posted
6 / 32
RoXXXieBlackheart See my TER Reviews 762 reads
posted
7 / 32

I personally would like to understand why other providers have this rule.
I am not of african decent but it really infuriates me to think that in this day and age people are still classifying folks based on race.
All women have the right to do what they want, with who they want, with their own bodies, of course. But to think that you are keeping yourself safer by being racist is just ignorant.
Any man, black, white or green, is just as capable of, whatever your afraid of, as the next.

ChristianSands 13 Reviews 1049 reads
posted
8 / 32

There are FAR more ladies that don't discriminate in this regard than that do discriminate this way.  Be thankful for the ones who discriminate that are upfront about it so that you don't waste your time setting up something only to arrive and be left in a hallway outside of a door that's not being answered because the provider didn't realize you were black until you showed up outside her door.
Everyone is entitled to their prejudices.  Doesn't matter why they exist, just that they exist.  No sense trying to understand them.

Posted By: pm2000
So I am new to this "HOBBY", haven't seen a provider new.  I don't have preferences as far as race goes but as most I have body type preferences.  I noticed in several ads "no black men" or "no black men under 30.  I am a over 35 and a Professional Executive type and I am African American.  Anything to this?  I have my thoughts but figure,why guess.  Ladies what do I need to know about this?  Please save me some time frustration or even embarrassment.

Pattaya729 1 Reviews 693 reads
posted
9 / 32

right or wrong it is what she wants. Why would you want to see someone who has a problem with your race? I doubt it would be a good time move on !

EbonyBrother 662 reads
posted
10 / 32

1. Some providers have a black SO at home and there SO told them not to hobby with black men.
2. I know of one provider from another region who was divorced from a black man and had to end up paying child support to him. As a result she decided not to see black men.
3. Some of have had bad experiences with black men in the past and have decided to avoid them all the together (all types of reasons for the problems).
4. The further south you go the more likely you are to see the "no black men". I never had problems seeing providers in the upper midwest years ago. Around here some have told me "I don't date your type". I don't complain, I just move on.

oversteerer 425 reads
posted
11 / 32

Posted By: Pattaya729
right or wrong it is what she wants. Why would you want to see someone who has a problem with your race? I doubt it would be a good time move on !
There are African American women who wont date white guys. I been told several times I dont date outside my race.  So it works both ways.

As long as the lady is witty, charming, intelligent and hot I date her and I dont care if she is green like Barney with a purple spot. If she looks hot is a short skirt and FMP's I ask her out or give her a try.

SedonaStarr 1183 reads
posted
12 / 32

You're black in America. I'm surprised that you're surprised to see this in writing. I guess all those EEOC laws and those constitutional amendments made you forget....or was it because you added EXECUTIVE to your name. LOL

pm2000 797 reads
posted
13 / 32

Great responses, much appreciated.  For those who wonder why I would ask I do know that these issues exist and I am not naive enough to think that I would or could be subject to these preferences.  I am new to this Hobby and want to know where this is coming from to avoid potential problems...

Nothing worse than being ignorant to the unwritten rules of the game. Just making sure I fully know what the deal is.

Generaltao 545 reads
posted
14 / 32

You have your preference and providers have their preference.

Vanica See my TER Reviews 684 reads
posted
15 / 32

In February for Black History month I am giving Black men, women and couples a discount. :-)

Kisses,
Vanica

pm2000 595 reads
posted
16 / 32

Agree, you are stunning by the way!

TiffaniJameson See my TER Reviews 658 reads
posted
17 / 32
McDonald000 90 Reviews 645 reads
posted
18 / 32

BackPage (BP) is not a good place to look at providers. Those girls are usually not reviewed and run lack luster service. There is more frequencies of "no black men" or "no black men under 30" in BP. However, that does not exclude that preferences from other ads. For example, every once in a while, I'll see a provider posting that preference here or on Ero. But, there seems to be more of that preference in BP.

There may be many reasons, and here are a few common reasons. First, it has to do with personal preference. For that reason, you should not be offended. Some say, "no black men under 30", because they do not want to date that demographics because they are unstable. Because, BP is a source for robbery, providers want to avoid young black men. Yes, providers do get robed by men, and its usually young men that are black.

Some other reasons are, they may be too rough in bed. There may be too much "drama". For example, they may request a discount or try to bargain with the provider. They may "flake" on the provider, that is, they will book an appointment and not show up. They may play too many games with texting and calling.

Most providers are able to accommodate the size of a man. Labeling that most African American men are well endowed is a big misconception. And, that is not a primary reasons for provider's posting that request.

If you feel that my comments are too blunt and straight forward, it is because I couldn't see any other way of putting it. You might be mislead if I was too passive, and I didn't see any other replies that address this issue.

Paisley Whispers See my TER Reviews 868 reads
posted
19 / 32

send me a pm or a email, I will see you

TheBlackMan 723 reads
posted
20 / 32

In my early hobby days I was like you.  I'd read an Ad with this preference and be like WTF?!?!?  I'm educated, professional, yada, yada, yada.  Then I concluded that a ladies preference is NOT an indictement on me nor should I take it personal.  Expereince and being in this hobby for many years now (double digit years) has taught me following:

1.  This the good ole-united-snakes-of-America.  The home of the KKK so why be surprised some ladies references when they were possibly indoctrinated with the KKK philosophy.

2. Some ladies have shared with me that from their personal experience that black men are too large, want multiple pops, and in general prefer a session that is more than what they want to provide when being in a business that they see a volume of men within a day/week.  NOW OF COURSE THE DISCLAIMER HERE IS OBVIOUS.  THESE OPINIONS ARE BASED ON THE LADIES PERSONAL EXPERIENCE AND/OR WHAT THEIR PROVIDER FRIENDS HAVE TOLD THEM PROBABLY WITH 1 MAYBE MAX 2 BLACK MEN AND THEY EXTRAPOLATE THIS EXPERIENCE TO APPLY TO ALL BLACK MEN.

3. For the scammer Bait and Switch types, they have shared with me that when they are executing their "game" on the "trick" the likely hood that a black guy will retaliate on the spot his greater than with other nationalities.  NOW OF COURSE THE DISCLAIMER HERE IS OBVIOUS.  THESE OPINIONS ARE BASED ON THE LADIES PERSONAL EXPERIENCE AND/OR WHAT THEIR PROVIDER FRIENDS HAVE TOLD THEM PROBABLY WITH 1 MAYBE MAX 2 BLACK MEN AND THEY EXTRAPOLATE THIS EXPERIENCE TO APPLY TO ALL BLACK MEN.

4. Some providers simply prefer and are more comfortable with providing for other than Blackmen because they are simply more comfortable and/or attracted to other than Blackmen.  There are no overt racist reasons just a matter of preference.  This also applies to OTHER nationalities.  I've met with White, Asian, and other nationalities who prefer Blackmen.

5. As you may already know there are Black providers who dont provide for Blackmen.  The rational that has been communicated to me is that they can get that at home and/or without being a provider.  White men, in general, have more disposable income to invest in the hobby.  Hence, less chance for the dreaded and extreme turn off of price negotiations.  And then some Black ladies simply prefer white men.  Do your thing gurl eventhough the sting from this can be alittle tough to bare sometimes depending on my mood.  NOW OF COURSE THE DISCLAIMER HERE IS OBVIOUS.  THESE OPINIONS ARE BASED ON THE LADIES PERSONAL EXPERIENCE AND/OR WHAT THEIR PROVIDER FRIENDS HAVE TOLD THEM PROBABLY WITH 1 MAYBE MAX 2 BLACK MEN AND THEY EXTRAPOLATE THIS EXPERIENCE TO APPLY TO ALL BLACK MEN.

6. Some ladies dont see blackmen for what they see on the lead story for the 6:PM news.  "Today a Blackman was caught, you fill in the blank _____________________________.  Hence they stereotype that seeing a Blackman has a greater chance of ending up in violence.  The thing that bothers me with this is that when the White Craigslist serial killer was seeking out providers to meet up with and kill I did not see any providers noting in their Ad I dont see White men because they may be a serial killer.  Go figure.

7. This is very intimate hobby and the service that is provided is on a very intirmate level.  So I aint mad at cha if you are not as comfortable with blackmen to be as intimate as you would be with a white man I appreciate the heads up.

And that is where I have the problem.  I now appreciate the ladies who plainly advertise they dont see Blackmen as it saves us all time, effort, and energy.  So ladies, dont be a coward and wait till I get to the location or determine by how I sound on the phone to tell me you dont see Black men.  Just put it in your Ad and I wont call you.


pm2000 545 reads
posted
21 / 32
Blowtorch333 2 Reviews 563 reads
posted
22 / 32

I really have no problem with it. This gets debated ad nauseum. I always say I would much rather have a woman say upfront what her restrictions are......... then finding out when she answers the door!

just sayin 511 reads
posted
23 / 32
magic4u 37 Reviews 442 reads
posted
25 / 32

When I first started to hobby, I got turned down a lot because of my age and race, but there were a few providers who would see. After word gets out, that you're legit, a lot of the providers may not have a problem with seeing you.

But there are those who are strict by that standard, and I wouldn't want to see them any way. Some providers I've seen have told me a lot of the younger BM clients under 30, can be rude, disrespectful, childish and or dangerous. Out in BWI there have been countless stories of providers being rapped, robbed, or have had pimps show up to their incall unexpected who were all BM under the age of 30.

So you have those few that mess it up for everyone for the good guys. How ever if anyone can remember the craiglist killer was a white man in medical school. ~shrugs~

TiffaniJameson See my TER Reviews 511 reads
posted
26 / 32

What I have found is that when Black men complain about this, he is targeting a certain group of women by whatever measure. It may be a certain price range, or of a certain work ethic. The amount of ladies that are NBA are a very small percentage to the total amount of women available to him. Even if he has a particular body type he goes for, there are women who will see him.

I would advise expanding the parameters of your search.

Good luck to you

pm2000 573 reads
posted
27 / 32

Thank you for your response.  I will keep this in mind.

wifefucker 514 reads
posted
28 / 32

"So you have those few that mess it up for everyone for the good guys. How ever if anyone can remember the craiglist killer was a white man in medical school. ~shrugs~"

Lets not forget all the serial killing Native Americans endured at the hands of white men.

If you are killed by a serial killer , it's usually a white man doing the killing.

MatureCompanion See my TER Reviews 522 reads
posted
29 / 32

So would you call men who don't see black women, ignorant? Or does it just apply to women??

It's ones *personal choice* something one has the freedom to utilize w/o being attacked for it.

You nor anyone has the insight as to *why* a lady chooses NOT to see black men.
You have zero knowledge IF perhaps at some point in her life she might of been attacked or harmed in any form or fashion by a black man. You have zero reason as to whether or not she's simply NOT attracted to black men.
You have zero knowledge about those women who *choose* not to see black men. And until you know personally as to their reasons why. Then don't call them ignorant!

I adore black men and have MANY wonderful NON-hobby professional black male friends in the DC/MD area, that I've known for 10-15 yrs. Yet, IF I were to ever decide NOT to see black men in the Hobby or civi world. They would be in complete understanding. They wouldn't call me ignorant nor attack me for the choices I make.
And IF I were to make said choice. I would have a solid damn good reason.


Ignorance is for the fool who lacks understanding of ones right to make their own choice to see or not to see whom they so desire.

Posted By: Roxie69
I personally would like to understand why other providers have this rule.
I am not of african decent but it really infuriates me to think that in this day and age people are still classifying folks based on race.
All women have the right to do what they want, with who they want, with their own bodies, of course. But to think that you are keeping yourself safer by being racist is just ignorant.
Any man, black, white or green, is just as capable of, whatever your afraid of, as the next.

TCNY See my TER Reviews 495 reads
posted
30 / 32

Posted By: pm2000
So I am new to this "HOBBY", haven't seen a provider new.  I don't have preferences as far as race goes but as most I have body type preferences.  I noticed in several ads "no black men" or "no black men under 30.  I am a over 35 and a Professional Executive type and I am African American.  Anything to this?  I have my thoughts but figure,why guess.  Ladies what do I need to know about this?  Please save me some time frustration or even embarrassment.
There is all kinds of discrimination in this business on BOTH ends. Everyone else has highlighted the possibilities, but my favorite (in my most sarcastic tone) one is all AA's have HIV; Someone stated this on the NY board as to why he wouldn't see black ladies. I've heard girls say the same thing about AA men. Coming from a bi-racial background (and having a degree in political science), I personally hate racial discrimination based on stereotypes.

Seek the more educated ladies in this business; we usually do not hold prejudiced views and will be more on your level.

pm2000 767 reads
posted
31 / 32

Wow I absolutely loved your website....as your website projects and your reviews confirm, you are an amazing woman!  I look forward to the opportunity to share a bottle of wine and enjoy your company.

Cheers!

RustyBingham 29 Reviews 427 reads
posted
32 / 32

Yes the paying customer has a choice if he does not want to see a certain type of lady (race, weight, etc). However lets be honest you do not see Brad Pitt walking in that door so for a lady to say "I don't see black men" does not make sense because it is very rare that the lady is attracted to any client.

This is about 'acting' and making us feel like we are worth million dollars..Personal choice is out the door when a lady accepts money for sex.

R

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