So I just need to share a story from the other day because I need to vent.  I had a 4 hour appointment request from a gentleman the other day.  It striked me as odd because usually guys don't ask for that long of an appoinment unless they have already seen me.  I asked him for the usual information that I require such as Full name, contact number, ref's I can email, and some other things.  He replied promptly with all of the information I asked for.  He then sent me another email asking me to change the appoinment to an overnight session.  Again, this striked me as odd.  He didn't flinch at my roses request and just seemed way to eager to meet.  I heard back from his ref the day of our appoinment and what she said disgusted me.  She said" He is fine to see if you want him to steal from you and leave brusies on your body." Sick.  She said while she went to the bathroom, he took all the money he brought from her and took her own money out of his wallet.  She said he was so rough that he left bruises on her body.   It makes me sick to think that I almost saw this guy.  Does anyone know if I'm allowed to post his information on TER to prevent other girls from seeing him.

GIRLS:  Please Please Please check your refs and do not see anyone who does not have them.  Your safety and life is not worth it.

Thanks for letting me vent everyone!

Muah!

Brianna

And give out information thru PM exchange. No personal information including email exchanges can post here. This information definitely needs to spread to the ladies but will have to be done back channel.

If the ass has a board presences I'd kinda like to know who he is.  BTW...another great example why checking references is soooooooooo important.

While what you say about checking references is so true, and you were absolutely right to abort, I would counsel against posting the information. The reference you received the information from could and perhaps should post the information in the providers' forum, since she has direct knowledge of what she says happened to her; but you only have hearsay at the moment. You do not have direct knowledge that the person is a thief and an abusive customer. To allege those things without direct knowledge is to open yourself up to trouble - it may be that no-one on here is likely going to sue for slander in the circumstances, but still. It is possible, after all, that the reference was not being entirely truthful, for whatever reason. You just can't know for sure. So one should be cautious about accusing someone, who has not been given a chance to respond even, of being a thief.

Thanks,

I wasn't accusing I was just simply stating what happened during the screening process.   You give good advice.  The post was meant more for the ladies on here and to warn them to screen very carefully and vice versa.

Muah!

Brianna

That's the point of references period. Trusting someone that is giving you the stop sign or green light is being truthful. I've gotten greenlights from girls and turns out the guy was a total tool etc. Technically all references can be hearsay until you meet them. I think we all already know that.

...Privacy.  Persuading your source for the information your received on this guy to post is a much better idea, especially since what you have conveyed is "hearsay" information. Although the information can be 100% accurate regarding the alleged "creep," there is always the outside chance that perhaps more is going on here than someone trying to protect you from trauma and theft.

I agree with privacy hound.  While I don't doubt that you are relaying what happened to u honestly a couple of things just don't add up.  He gave you his reference's contact info after he supposedly robbed her and bruised her up.  When he gave u her contact info for a reference he thought she would say something nice. Either he is truly as dumb as a post or it didn't happen exactly like she said it did.  There are a few sites where providers can blacklist hobbiest without being challenged and with little or no provocation.  After his reference was robbed and bruised did this man's info show up on one of this sites immediately?  Probably not.  U did the right thing by not seeing him.  U didn't feel comfortable with the situation and u chose to protect urself.  But u can't be sure of the providers motives either.  Who do u think he spent his money with when u turned him down?

please post to the provider's only board here, there and everywhere.

You most certainly should post the details on the provider board.  Make it clear that you are just relating a series of events and information as they occurred.  You are not acusing anyone.  ID the client and indicate how you got the info.  If the facts are even close to correct, you might save someone from serious harm.  If the facts aren't correct -- tough cumquats.  The client's issue is with the reference who gave you the information.

I'm very glad that you avoided a potentially dangerous situation.

...national blacklist resources, but please be careful to relate your specific personal experience rather than hearsay accounts from fellow providers.  Sounds like your phone call to the reference was a very good idea indeed - you may have saved yourself a miserable experience...  Makes you wonder why he user her as a reference.  Maybe thinking you wouldn't check?  Glad you did.  All the best.

As the individual in questions I would like to present my side of the situation.  When I first read the post I was mortified to see the things I was accused of doing.  I have never stolen from or physically harmed a woman in my life.  I personally think hitting a woman is one of the lowest acts a man can engage in.  Following the notice from the provider that she received a bad reference for me and would have to cancel I received a nasty e-mail from the provider supplying the reference.  This came as a shock to me as during our session I never stole from nor physically harmed her. In the days following we even exchanged emails on a subject we had discussed in which she stated she would like to see me again in the future.  My theory is that this is an innocent mistake in which I have been confused with another individual.  I already sent an e-mail to her apologizing for anything I might have done, asked to clarify the situation, and offered to make amends.

I want to be perfectly clear that I support what Brianna did in immediately canceling the appointment and raising awareness among other providers of my alleged actions.  Personal safety must be everyone's first priority without exception.  I am seeking to clarify the situation but in the mean time I plan on taking a hiatus from the hobby as this incident has drawn an inordinate amount of attention to me that I am not comfortable with.  Please stay safe and send me any questions or suggestions.

should only be done with clients who you have seen already and have some rapport with. Sometimes providers can use things to make innocent clients into monsters out of revenge, and other times clients can be wolf in sheeps clothing, with only a previous provider to tell the tale. Either way it good this was posted publically.

I agree with this poster.    I guess each hobbist has their thing, but I personally would never consider more than a TWO hour session with a provider I had never met before.  4 hours...much less an overnighter...just screams odd to me.  I tend to think of it as meeting anyone for the 1st time...you use that meeting as a platform to launch future things.  A date of that length initially would almost assuredly make anything that follows pale in comparison.

While the hobby itself goes to a much more intimate dynamic that a normal meet-n-greet with a new friend...there's still a degree of etiquette needed.    

On a personal note, I only have 2 providers that I'd even dream of going 10-12 hours with...and that feeling is only reach after 4-5 visits and 2+ years of developing  a quality friendship.

Frankly, I can't speak for-or-against either party since I'm an outsider to this ordeal...but if the story is true (or even partly thereof) the guy should burn in hell real darn slow.  Shameful!!

How do you know she wasn't just trying to keep that client as her's?

I once received a negative ref from a lady. But he had two others that could not say enough great things about him. I met him and he was a doll! Everything the lady giving the negative ref said was completely untrue. It is possible that they just had a bad experience, but I doubt it because he voluntarily submitted her info to vouch for him.

Now, I'm not saying that this is the case here, but keep in mind that it does happen.

Xox
Colette

Thanks for your opinion.  I did not fabricate what I posted. Just sharing my experience and trying to help other providers.......................................