Its funny even when I call and agency, I always make it known to them, my race even though they may have it, but i want to make sure the female that i plan on seeing is comfortable with me!!! Because the worst thing to happen is get there and have an awkward non positive experience, its like walking in thee room and the chick not looking like what you expected, from that point the experience is fudged up!!!!

any unnecessary drama. Most providers will advertise that on the website if this is their preference. Some will say no African Americans, No Native Americans, or No Asians.

Anyhow, I am almost certain that if the provider has this kind of preference, they will indeed post this on their personal or ad website. Most of the providers that I've seen that post this kind of preference are the BackPage providers. I'd hate to show up and say, oh, I'm African American or Native American BTW, is that gonna be a problem?

Also, some providers chose to do this the passive way. They'll request specific information. As a result, they can chose to see who they wanna see without tarnishing their reputation.

So, most providers will let their clients know, either on their ad or personal website. I've never heard of an incident where a client got turned down because of his race after he was there. If so, please tell.

If they put in their ad they have a racial preference or prefer not to see a certain race, they get blasted on message boards and in reviews. If they don't put anything and turn someone away at the door, they get blasted on message boards and in reviews. No win situation!

This topic used to be debated at least once a month on "another board" and my response was always the same. It's her body, she can share it with whomever she wants to. It's not up to us.

is showing! I have never seen a provider indicate no Native Americans or Asians. You and I (and everyone else here) know the excluded class 99.9999% of the time is Blacks. Get real dude!

I personally don't understand this practice of excluding a whole sector of the population from your business but to each their own.

......she should at least make including what your race or ethnicity is an important part of her screening if not seeing certain races or ethnic groups is that important to her (for whatever reason). Maybe agencies should implement that too if they don't already. So maybe to them they don't see so rude about rejecting you because of your race/or ethnicity.

If a provider discriminates by race, then she needs to be up front about it as to not waste everyone's time.
Have the courage of your convictions which sadly is asking a lot for many these days.

On occasion I get women who say "No Black guys" when I'm speaking to them during the first initial interview on the phone. At which point I inform them they can't work with me and I give them the website URL to several other agencies in the area.

It always amazes me since we address this issue before you get to our job form on our website.

Must be "Professional with all persons regardless of ethnic background or social class".

We also state it in our employment ads on various other sites as well.
"12. Individuals incapable of conducting themselves in a professional manner regardless of a clients individual ethnic background, are advised to apply elsewhere.  "

... and yet I still get the morons applying.

There are days it just blows my mind.

Sincerely,

Lee Dreams
"It's all about integrity."

You expect girls who are applying for escorting read all the RULES OF CONDUCT on your website?

A lot of people out there need to be handheld/spoon-fed. I've about 20 employees working in my business, and they do stupidest of mistakes. But they are good employees; they are honest. And I've trained them properly. They are a lot better now, than they were when they first applied.

So you really think that if person is a little deficient in some aspect such as paying attention to detail, he/she is a moron?Let me tell you something. Most people don't pay attention to detail right off the bat, but they can be trained to do so.

BTW, I do applaud your policy of not discriminating.

-- Modified on 7/17/2012 9:10:35 PM

...is to request physical description during the screening process. Then, if a lady has concerns based on that information, she can politely delete the gentleman's email without offending him with statements like "I don't see men who are ____". Of course not every lady who asks for this information intends to discriminate, she may just want to know what her date will look like. To each their own. xo

CurlyW:

By the way how's Moe and Larry ? (nyuck....nyuck...nyuck..nyuck)  

But seriously folks...

Can you accept this is an industry unlike most where the consequences for screw ups is considerably higher than in others?  Unlike some of the other industries I've been in, additional training can't fix some issues.

Yes I do, because it says something about them. Those who don't, past experience has taught us they will fail 99% of the time.This is true and a sorry state of affairs, as we slide the slippy slope to the welfare state mentality.  

I have an obligation to my clients to protect them as well as my associates.  I INTENTIONALLY have an onerous employment process. It wasn't decided to do this on some whim, it is a culmination of many successes and  failures by me and other members of the Fantasys Network. My business partner Mike of Fantasys has been in the business 30 years and made some god awful mistakes and lived to tell and learn from it.  We took the most successful women in the network and examined what they all had in common, then we tailored the employment process for those personality types and traits.Like you we have an extensive training program (*Laugh* ask any client they'll tell you ). However in our case, if you have a history of poor judgment and life skills, training sometimes can't fix that. I have to be able to trust, you will follow procedures and not endanger yourself, a client, other associates and this company.Have you been to Capitol Hill lately? Come on to quote Nancy Pelosi: "We Have to Pass the Bill So That You Can Find Out What Is In It"        2700 pages and 10 new taxes later.....We state in our employment advertising very clearly, no drugs and we run criminal background checks.
Tonight I had a woman apply and the following pop up:

10/31/1997  PROSTITU:PROCURE/SOLICIT
06/02/2002  CRED CRD/ANOT. CHARG L/T $500
12/02/2004  POSSESS-NOT MARIHUANA
07/15/2010  DUI
Those were just the highlights there was A LOT more.

So here is my question, would you trust a person with this history to represent you company with your customers? My clients trust us to provide them to the best of our ability quality individuals they can trust.

I get where you're coming from however can you understand the unique set of constraints I must work under in this business?

Sincerely,

Lee Dreams

"Sine amore, nihil est vita"

MplsButterfly:

If I understand what you're saying, you advocate a more dishonest approach to illicit information and if you don't like his answer, just delete his e-mail and leave him hanging ?

Please correct me if I am wrong in my interpretation of what you just wrote. I'm sure I may have misunderstood you.


Sincerely,

Lee Dreams
"It's all about integrity."

So today it's no black, no Asians... Tomorrow no fat guys or no hairy guys?

Well, I get the latter and frankly I don't know how you could go down on a fat hairy guy... But I digress.

I'm just curious why some races are excluded, PM me if it's easier to respond privately.

First thought that came to my mind; dont waste my time and I wont waste yours. Yes, she should be up front and have it on her website / ad.  I appreciate ladies that are up front and avoid an uncomfortable situation.

…to discriminating, as silly as that sounds. I believe it is much more considerate to let someone down by deleting their email or saying you are not available (and will not be for the foreseeable future) than to directly tell them you would prefer not to see them because of their looks, race or whatever. It may be a covert way of handling the issue, but not dishonest IMHO. I am all for being nice about it.

Lets say someone emailed me today for appointment in  DC when my website clearly states that I will be there in AUGUST, not JULY.

Do I politely respond to him saying "I am sorry, but  I am currently in NY, however I will be happy to schedule something for when I am actually visiting" or should I tell him "READ MY SITE YOU MORON"

Just seeking your opinion on the matter

Lina

I personally will not see russian clients in NYC.  I MAY make an exception if I am touring very very very far away from NY, but never in NYC will I accept an appointment from someone who speaks russian.

Why?  Too close to home so to speak.

Some ladies won't see black guys, some won't see chinese, some don't see young men, some don't see old men, the list is endless.

Beauty of the lifestyle however is for every customer there is a provider.

Lina

However, there are providers out there that will not see Mexicans and Asians. I travel to the west part of Virginia a lot, and lets just say, they do it differently down there. I didn't want to say it, but, there are providers in BackPage in the Virgina section that posted, No yellowskin, blacks, or Mexicans, all in the same sentence.

When I mentioned Native Americans, it was a figure of speech, and I wasn't being literal about it. Thank you for making that distinction. However, you should also know that every part of the world has its preference. You live in American, and here in the Washington DC area. In other parts of the world, and even other states, you'll see discrimination of other types of races, and not always African Americans.



-- Modified on 7/18/2012 1:41:46 AM

Depends, if the information in 14 point type on your main page in a high contrast color only Stevie Wonder could miss;   I would ask, "did you not see the message posted on the main page?"

When they reply "yes, I did".

You would be justified in asking what part of "I will be there in AUGUST, not JULY", moron?

Of course, we both understand you're not going to win customer service points with that one.
However, chances are if they ignored the information on the main page,  it's a precursor to further trouble down the road. Sadly, I get about 5 to 10 really dumb questions a day. The kind of simple stuff which answers are on profiles and FAQ pages already.

This is not to be confused with the honest gaff.

Oh and... I've been known to do it..... some days its just so..... Satisfying! { Laugh}

Maybe we should get together one day and tag team e-mail.. now that could be fun!

{Insert wild maniacal laughter here }


Insanely Sincere,

Lee Dreams
"Sine amore, nihil est vita"

99.99% of the times, when a provider doesn't see a certain race, it is black. They usually say that AA men are rude, too much foul language, rough (band the shit out of them), too big, cheap and smelly.
Seldom, I do see them also excluding latinos and Indians (South Asian ones). And very very rarely, Asians.
On BP, some girls advertise this blatantly.
Many reputable TER independent and Agency girls also do not see blacks. They are less obvious about it. They find out through screening. They here about their clients through back channels and references and make their decision through that.

You can have "the Black Experience" and I'm not talking omitting cream from your coffee.

You could laterally go black, then you could come back and talk about it.

http://www.oprah.com/oprahshow/Race-on-The-Oprah-Show-A-25-Year-Look-Back/5

I guess you could then say, "you went Black and you came back".....    

Lee Dreams
"Sine amore, nihil est vita"

Lee.. Lee....Lee...

Laterally or Literally? Oh C'mon now.

How can you slip, and then expect every poor girl who applies to be perfect

...That the cost of screw up in this industry is far more than other. Its certainly much more than what it is in my line of work..

I've seen on a girls website she was blatantly white men only and she only made exceptions on latinos if they were the "white kind".

..I respect that. Their body; their choice.  

I ain't kissing anyone who doesn't want to kiss me because of my skin color.

Please don't misunderstand me.  Your point is that a women "provider" should see any client of any race.  I don't find asian women attractive.  So the provider doesn't find AA men attractive.  So what.  Thats her business.  Its not racial.  Maybe she doesn't like kinky hair etc.  Who are you to tell someone that.

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Humm let's review precisely what I said shall we?

I'm failing to see anywhere in there, where I state "Your point is that a women "provider" should see any client of any race".

Let's go down the fact list shall we ?  OR How about, No Sir, my point was as follows:

1)  She said: "No, I do not believe it should be a requirement. I find a nice way to exclude based on looks is to request physical description during the screening process."

My contention was, then the REAL reason your asking for said information is to find a reason to discriminate.  This is no different then when the IRS asks for additional information to better hang you, the 'spirit of the request' is the same. As opposed to asking as part of your security procedure to match that information at the door. One action is wholly honest, the other is a deception.

2)  She said: "Then, if a lady has concerns based on that information, she can politely delete the gentleman's email without offending him with statements like "I don't see men who are ____". "

As a tested to on this board, often the e-mail is deleted with no reply. HOWEVER, my point was how about 'be honest'. This way the contact does happen in the first place. Have the courage of your convictions and preferences for what you really want. This way one is not doing this politically correct, mental gymnastics to justify behavior one is not willing to take ownership of.

Oh and while I'm at it.When it comes to  opinions Blacks are just as varied as any other group, however it is my contention you MplsButterfly are misguided  in this. Most blacks would rather be told the honest truth, than what is usually a very transparent lie. Non-whites have a very keen bull shit detector when it comes to this specific  subject and they are not fooled. Which in the end many find even more insulting, than the truth. Just because  you (universal tense) are not confronted with the lie doesn't mean you got away with it.

At no point have I said what she should do or not do, what I have done is called into question what I  perceive  to be conceptual dishonesty in her belief systems supported by the medium or veneer of political correctness.

In short I shared an opinion and questioned the central premise of her ideas.See Jason we're all good, I haven't misunderstood you. If anything you were  SO INTENT on playing White Knight, you completely missed and misunderstood the lance thrust of my central point.

I'm sure we'll Joust again sometime, if anything  I have greatly enjoyed your non compos mentis.

Sincerely, with a slight hint of devilish mirth,

Lee Dreams
"In vino veritas, in aqua sanitas"

When I was totally in the game, I had the dreaded peep  thru hole and not answer the door.  My money is long and if you don't want a regular don't answer the door.lol I am low threat and will move on to someone who will answer the door. Fool me once shame on me. I ratherly  see any Caucasian ladies because of this issue but I do see some wonderful Latino ladies who are great.Move on to who will see you. Juss saying!!

Deleted..

-- Modified on 7/18/2012 1:24:38 PM

she's automatically a racist. For instance, I'm no racist but I dont find Black women attractive. But I do find asian and latin women attractive......so there!

...for example, a restaurant not wanting to cater to black people. Sure I would like to know that critical information upfront so I could avoid them. I would be considered one of the excluded people after all. Then I would move on to a venue that will gladly open their doors to me. I get that.

However, I do not feel the same way when it comes to this industry for two reasons.

A provider's business is fragile and she needs to approach it with as much care as possible. It is plausible that if she turns off the wrong person(s) (even with the most innocent mistakes), they may make it their mission to ruin her business. So as I have gotten older, I have learned it is best to be nice as much as possible.

Besides that, I can imagine that reading these types of “NO [INSERT TYPE] men allowed” statements would be so hurtful. Just imagine if a lady noted on her site that she does not cater to overweight men. That would be so insensitive and hurtful to a large percentage of men here. We should take their feelings into consideration and just be nice. It is good to be nice is really all I meant.

Good dialogue.

However, I will see them in DC and anywhere else.

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