SO last night I get a request for out call, he texted "dinner date $350" and we went on from there. He mentioned he had a TER but failed to include it in his texts. we chatted for a bout two hours while i got ready and "flex screened" him. I tried every way i knew to make sure the guy was safe and not a cop.

when he arrives he texts me back to back for 10 minutes rushing me to come outside, so like a professional i tend to him, when i get in car before i put seat bealt on he grabs my head and makes me choke on his cock. then i feel a hard cold something in the back of my head. he kept threatning me to keep going or else... at this point im shuffling for my iphone who had a fuckin number lock on it and i couldnt open it from position i was in.

the dude finally grabbed my hair up and pointed the gun to my face and told me to get out of his car and not look at his plates or he'd come back and kill me.


MOST UNFORTUNATE EXPERIENCE I HAVE HAD YET. i have never been treated like this, and on top of it i did not get payed. I mean fuck if you have a crazy fantasy like maybe what he had and was trying to manifest in a realistic point of view - warn the girl.

i feel like i got face raped :/

thoughts?



and no this is not a cry for attention, im shocked and a lil scared to book appts  now :/

anyone who doesn't pass your screening, do not see them

First, thank God you're OK (relatively speaking). I know a sweet young lady in NoVA last year that had a gun pulled on her as well... and spent weeks recovering when the crazy guy pulled the trigger and nearly blew her leg off. The world if full of bad people... sounds like you met one of them.

Second, this is why so many quality ladies simply will not see anyone without verifiable references or appropriate screening services. It's nice that you want to be accommodating, but not at the risk of your life.

Third, I would suggest you connect with other local quality providers and discuss the best means of screening... although I suspect they may already be reaching out to you (or will post here shortly).

Finally, take the day off the recover and do something nice for yourself. But don't give up on the business... there are a lot of great people you'll meet along the way that make this enjoyable for everyone.

xoxo

Let me start by saying that I'm not trying to be condescending or imply you are stupid/naive, whatsoever.  You have just been through an extremely traumatic event and you're trying to make sense of it.

You say that you feel like you got face raped?  That's because you WERE face raped.  You are the victim of a violent crime.  You have been violated and threatened.  Your attacker did not act out a fantasy, he committed several crimes.  There is no valid excuse/explanation.

You are right to be shocked and scared.  That is completely normal.  What this psycopath did is not.  I am sure that others in this community can give you better advice on what to do next.  Some of that may mean better screening, etc.  I don't know what measures you took or what you could do better.  But I am glad that you are now safe and it did not escalate further.  I also hope that this traumatic experience does not have a lasting impact (or at least as minimal as possible).  I'm sure it will affect you and how you act moving forward.  Hopefully just finding a way to be safer (not that you were negligent or at fault in any way).  I also hope that this maniac gets what he deserves.

im normally very careful and paranoid. financially i was in a rut so i took a risk. never again - it was the worst experience i have ever had. i hope no one goes through it.

his number was google voice but i do have it just in case any girls want the info.
i can give full description of guy too.


i just did not want to involve cops for obvious reasons :/

would they even have helped or just arrested both of us??

...first of all, I sent you a playful PM this morning in response to your PM before I saw this.  Now I feel like an insensitive ass.  Sorry Becky - just saw things in the wrong order honey.

You should be able to find a criminal attorney who will give you free advice on this one Becky.  If not, then call the rape crisis hotline.  This is something you NEED to do regardless, you were raped honey.  Just talk to someone there today and then if you feel comfortable bringing it up, and you really should, then find out the best way to handle this.  I am guessing that you can anonymously have this jackass pursued.

We had our own way of dealing with guys who mistreated ladies back in my military days.  Guys didn't pull this shit twice, I can fuckin' tell ya that.

DC Rape Crisis Center
dcrapecrisiscenter.org/ShareWelcome to the temporary website of the DC Rape Crisis Center, while we get ... A. Scott Bolden, Managing Partner, Washington, D.C. Office, Reed Smith, LLP ...
Google+ page - Write a review
1625 K St NW # 700  Washington, DC 20006

And the advice to do something nice for yourself today was solid.  I know the money hasn't been there from your post, but go sit in a hot-tub somewhere with some of your favorite tunes sweetie.  AFTER you call the hotline.
(202) 232-0789

The cops care a lot more about sexual assault involving guns than they do prostitution. They couldn't arrest you because you didn't commit a crime; you were a crime victim. How much they would care if they knew or guessed that you were an escort, I don't know. It probably varies by jurisdiction. The cops would take it less seriously than if a high school girl got pulled off the street and forced to do the same thing, but maybe he is getting his sick kicks off that way too. Whether he does that or not, I seriously doubt if you are his only victim. If you got a look at his license plates in spite of his threat, you could report it (anonymously if that would make you feel safer), and do a service to the entire community. If you have a good description that might help too, but it would give them less to go on.

Yes, it was rape and it was not your fault and don't let anyone here tell you otherwise.  Give yourself some love and attention and time.  It will take time and that is ok. As with any aspect of our lives, we look back and try to learn from our experiences so we will be wiser in the future.

Hugs

Jessie

At least you realize that part and will hopefully screen much more effectively in the future. If he mentioned that he had a TER handle but didn't text it to you and you and him was talking and texting for about two hours, then why didn't you ask him for his TER handle to verify him?

Most girls that have bad experiences are the ones that fail at their screening. Either they skip one step or another, didn't screen properly, or relied too much on what he said to verify himself. I'll be very honest with you, the way you approached this situation is not  safe because of the way you described him.

First, no real client is going to talk to a provider for about two hours. Second, any guy that rushes a girl when he arrives is unprofessional and that should have been another clue for you to stay away. You mentioned that when he arrived, he was texting you for 10 minutes back to back to come outside and rushed you. Since you weren't detailed in where the event took place, then I would assume he arrived at your hotel. You made another third mistake. Since you didn't screen him properly, you should have asked him to meet you in the lobby or another "public" place. That way, you see what he looks like and get a feel from him on the phone.

Even if you decided to get in the car with him, you should have asked him to park in the entrance lobby so he doesn't grab you by the head and forced you to perform oral sex on him. That is why it is so important to screen properly. If he sounds like a weirdo on the phone and making those weird gestures, then WTF are you doing seeing him? There are some mentally unstable and some fucking weirdos out there. Those are the kind of guys you want to avoid.

Now I will answer your LE question. First, LE are here to protect and serve. Yes, LE are our friends if we obey the law. With that being said, LE will seek cases of sexual rape victims, despite if they are escorts or prostitutes. However, when LE ask for evidence, then you have to show them the text messages you had with him or any other communications you had as your proof. LE is not stupid and will realize that you are an escort when you present your case to them. LE will not arrest you if you did not mentioned anything sexual in your text for an exchange for money.

Escorts are legal, and you tell them that you were providing an escort service and that he was paying you for your time only and for him to take you out for dinner. Again, LE will not arrest you. Their job is to protect and serve and if you present a sexual rape case, then it is their job to protect and serve. They "protect" and "serve". Again, LE is not stupid and will realize that you may be the "other" type of escort and will only give you advices to stop doing what your doing. They will not arrest you if you simply tell them the situation and did not admit to any sexual exchanges for money. However, there are always circumstances when you bring attention to yourself. So, you have to compare the pros and cons.

As everyone said in their reply, I too am sorry for what happened. I am not a soulless weirdo and do care for people. However, I also know how the situation could have been prevented from the beginning.

In life, we go through challenges and obstacles that will help and prepare us in the future. Only the successful had these experiences because they know how to prepare for them if it was ever presented to them again. I hope you learned from this and will make the necessary changes. BTW, don't ever let one spoiled apple ruin it for the rest of the other apples. Take some time to recover and reflect.

703-360-7273.  You can be completely anonymous.  Wonderful people.  Take Care of you!

Jessie

i appreciate your advice.

I've been around the industry for quite a few years more than 15. My mentor has been in this business for over 30 years. I don't know it all, I never will know it all and I am willing to learn even more.

As the saying goes not my first bus ride downtown. Not my first experience in what you've experienced.

I'm not going to repeat what has already been said.

After reading the information you have provided, when you are ready I can tell you exactly were you screwed up 'strictly from a business prospective'. Let be clear, this was rape as others have pointed out and I'm not going to rehash what has been adequately addressed before me.

This business is a four part equation. What you do,  how you do it are parts one and two. There are obviously two more elements which most people in your age group fail to learn if at all. Those who do, usually only after experiencing what happened to you a couple more times.  

I have mentored agency owners and several independents. The one's who apply the principles rarely have negative outcomes, the  one's who do not have them all the time.

There it is, straight up, no sugar coating, no BS.

You want the information, you know where to find me and in your own time.
At this point, do or do not.... there is no try. It's totally up to you.


Off to make Sunday morning blueberry pancakes.


Lee Dreams
veritas vitæ magistra

-- Modified on 1/27/2013 12:05:26 PM

I was just reading this and I feel so bad for you.  I'm glad that you didn't get hurt.  It really pisses me off and makes me want to get a crew of guys together and go find this lowlife and beat the crap out of him.  This is why this business should also be LEGAL.  Then you'd feel comfortable going to the police.  Child trafficing would also stop.  STDs would probably go down too.  But what do I know.  No one listens to me. Everyone, be careful out there.

Sorry about what happened. Someone pulling out the gun was horrible. I know you were trying to accommodate him, but it was not wise.  Next time, resist seeing anybody, until they get verified by P411, DC or 2 or 3 indisputable references.

If you knew their P411 or TER ID, at least you could do something about it. You have no info to work with...

I am glad you came out without any physical injury though. It will take time but you will get better


-- Modified on 1/27/2013 9:58:47 AM

Jessie made a VERY important point here Becky.

You made mistakes that CONTRIBUTED to the end result.  This does not in any way make you responsible for what happened - that is 100% on the perp.  There is a very significant difference between the two.

He set out to do this last night, and will only be more sure of himself having succeeded.  Please try and find the courage to take him down.   I know it is hard.

Please don't spend time alone today Becky.  Easy to crawl into a ball today, please keep someone around who you trust.

I'm sorry this happened to you- you're a sweet girl, and nobody deserves this kind of treatment- I agree with the poster who said that you need to take some time off...it pisses me off that assholes like this exist...I've heard some horror stories from my ATF- some guys are just horrible people

First of all, Rebecca I am glad you made it here to tell us and are alive. Big hugs to you dear. I am very, very sorry this happened to you. What a terrifying ordeal! Please do not blame yourself at all, you were a complete victim obviously.

I don't know what is going on but this is just insane with the sheer volume of predators coming after ladies. It isn't just one particular area either. It seems men are more reluctant to provide screening info than ever, (I understand with the scandals on the national news) and more ladies are being harmed and ripped off than ever. More ladies are also being rounded up than ever by Leo and it's not just the bottom feeders and low hanging fruit either.

I do not want to see another lady hurt, frightened, bullied, or ripped off. I do not want to see another lady pushed into taking less than what she should for screening information either because she's afraid she isn't going to make her bottom line and the gents are getting the upper hand.

Gents, I do not want your name or number to put it up in lights, I have no ill use for it and neither does any lady worth her salt. Safety is paramount. We are not saving these things. Please do use the verification sites, we love it when you do. We all want to keep things safe, light, and fun. This shouldn't be happening at all. I'm saddened and disgusted by the frequency of these occurrences lately. Until we agree to work together it will keep happening. We must protect each other to keep a safe network. These ripoff's and abusers need to be drummed out period!

That's my opinion, I welcome yours..

Grace

Take care of yourself and don't beat yourself up.  Take time to heal and then chalk it up as a life lesson.

FWIW, it should be possible to get the bastard busted without screwing yourself.  I'm not an expert, but I know the cops are generally much more interested in getting violent rapists off the streets than any alleged misdemeanors that you may be accused of.  If you're up to it, talk to a councilor and see what they say.  It would be nice to get this asshole locked up before he does more damage.

In any case, stay strong.  This too shall pass.

Rebecka, I can't tell you how sorry I am that you ran into that psychopath... I hope you get the help you need to deal with the trauma. Take some time off. I would take the advice others gave you on this thread and contact the police. They can and will track him down. PM me if you need to know more about this, but it's very simple...

I know you are on the PO board. There are dozens of threads about screening on there. You should read them, learn all you can about ways of keeping yourself safe, and stick to the methods described there because they can literally save your life, you see that now. Bad guys will go for the low hanging fruit, and in this case he went for you because you did not screen. ("Flex screening"? NO SUCH THING!!! Talking to someone (or worse, texting him) to get a "feel" for his personality and intentions does NOT qualify as screening, you know that now. Anyone can act like a normal person on the phone, but that means absolutely nothing. Jeffrey Dahmer... Charles Manson... Ted Bundy... All those guys were very charming! You are lucky to be alive. Please, never again go off of "vibes" only...)

With that said, I remember seeing two threads by you about helping another girl get into this business, or possibly opening a service/agency soon... I'm sorry to say this, but I really don't think it's a good idea. Screening for others and running an agency requires skills that you do not currently seem to have. You have to be a businesswoman first, with a really good grip on all aspects of the business, otherwise you are putting others at risk. Imagine if you sent your friend (the one you posted about) out on an appointment and she ended up getting hurt. You can't risk that.

Please take some time to get over last night's horrors, then re-evaluate your screening and refine your methods until you are 100000% confident that you are only seeing men who have good intentions toward you. Then, if you have been doing well and succeeded on your own for a few years, you can start sharing your knowledge and helping others in this business. I wish you the best.

Glad to hear your unharmed physiically. Share as much info as you can on the providor board.  Keep up your screening and try to see regular clients till you fell comforable.  Tjis may seem easy for a third party to say but you shoud take solice in the fact that any creep that would pull a stunt like you described will probably get his in the long run.

Also, don't hesitatle to vent on these boards, alot of good supportive folks here.

Everyone has already said the advice side and the apologetic side and I guess I am just repeating that. That sort of stuff outrages me. PLEASE heed the advice and try to relax and recover. I am wondering why you didnt try and take a picture of his plates anyway ORRRRRR, if you were at a hotel, there are cameras, right? Was this directly out front in the car?? Something might be recorded. At least his plates? They wouldn't ever have to know it wasn't just a 'regular' date and then this happened~ the person who said escorting is legal, that's true! Idk, i hope there is a way for justice to prevail in this situation, but, at least I hope you are careful, take care of yourself and come to a place of peace and happiness in the aftermath. xoxo

I totally agree that there has been in uptick in shady folks.

In this last month, I've had someone use me as a reference that I'd never seen or had never even contacted me, someone who was dodgy every time I asked for references which immediately turned me off from conversation, someone who had a bunch of references but when contacted got a LOT of "NOs" only to see new reviews (in the last few days) of other people they'd seen who I assume didn't screen, someone who when googled, their criminal record came up as the first hit... It makes me very aware of how good I've had it thus far if this is the first I'm encountering any of it. I suppose it comes with the territory of me not advertising publicly before. P411 and Datecheck spoil you with ease and quality of clients.

The advice of taking the day to yourself is sound, except that I would go as far as saying take as much time off as you need. Days, weeks, months. Really process this trauma and come to terms with it. If you try to rush your acceptance process, you'll find it manifesting in strange ways; breaking down crying in a supermarket, at the sound of a voice that reminds you, all sorts of things will trigger those intense feelings again. You should consider therapy as well.

And beyond the screening mistake which I would assume you won't ever make again, don't let yourself get to points of desperation. Assess why you were in that predicament and make changes to avoid it: take a real PT job, budget, save more discretionary money, change your spending habits, etc.
Obviously I don't know you situation, but I'm sure there is something more to be learned than "always screen".

Stay safe.

i will be taking all advice and putting it in effect!

Not screening well is a mistake, but it had nothing to do with either texting nor getting the money up front.  A sick person like this would have handed over the money and then taken it back at gun point.  This kind of person is sick and evil.

I am very glad it didn't turn out any worse than it did.  I am very sorry this happened, Rebecca.

Girl I'm sorry that happened to you but ya gotta screen BEFORE you meet! Once you get there it is often too late especially regarding LE! NO amount of money is worth your safety or freedom! Stay safe!

I'm taking everyone very serious and taking action
I will be cranking down on screening as well
Safety first .

Thanks again

Those who have sent Pms and email ill be replying as soon as I can

Love truly!!!!!!

I wanted to add one more thing and that is the fact that this man has probably done this before and will do it again, this isn't a one time thing. Yes you need to work on your screening but it's NOT your fault! I would urge you to consider making a police report, you may save a life! Behavior like this usually escalates, he may pull the trigger next time. I'm very sorry someone has treated you so horribly but there are lots of wonderful clients out there and this can be a very fun and exciting way to earn a living so don't let one douchebag ruin it for you.

Girl ,sometimes  is better to not make money and get screening, screening, screening  By SAFE !.....

They could have arrested both of you... the unfortunate fact is that you were engaging in an illegal activity at the time, so if you do report it, you may want to contact a criminal defense attorney prior to make sure you don't make any incriminating statements while reporting. That said, what he did was illegal and a sexual assault and I'm relatively certain would fall under violent rape statutes and assault with a deadly weapon/aggravated assault.

Your call on whether you want to report, but if you do, make sure you're doing what you can to protect yourself.

Also, to clarify an earlier suggestion, criminal attorneys only defend crimes, not prosecute them. The plaintiff in a criminal case will always be the state (I.e. a District Attorney or someone with the power of that office behind him/her).

This is why.

This is where a lack of screening and a lack of standards leads.

I'm incredibly sad this happened to you and I am not going to blame you, the victim.

But when someone can't even give you the courtesy of speaking to you like a human being, instead barking 'dinner date $350' at you, well that isn't someone you should be meeting.  And you shouldn't be hopping in people's cars either.  You're lucky you're alive.  Girls do get killed in this game.

i know i got a lot of re grouping to do
i normally dont have these problems

thank you for advice and kind words