Still being relatively new to the sugar bowl I had not yet encountered the phenomenon called ghosting. I searched on previous threads and discovered that others have experienced it but boy I still didn’t expect it from someone with whom we had had such a good time. I have about 4 in my rotation. One of my favorites has been very nice to me in many ways. When I was recently out of town at a family reunion event, she texted me to ask when I was coming back. She said can’t wait to see you again, let me know when you’re back in town. So I did. I got back and texted her. Waited a day for a reply and got nothing. Then sent a few more messages just basically saying I’m here, let’s get together. I get nothing. No response at all. I would prefer she tell me no that she can’t for this reason or that reason but to get no reply at all, I find that disconcerting.  

Now I understand the relationship of SD/SB, but even so you do develop some feelings for these girls and often are just concerned for their well being. So I don’t get it. Are they just flakey? Why do they ghost us, especially those who have been so good to them?

Don't assume the worst just yet - flakiness goes with the demographic we like to play in.   I wouldn't be surprised if she pops back up in the near future with some kind of explanation.  These girls usually have all kinds of levels of drama in their lives - could be as basic as not paying her phone bill all the way up to major family or legal issues.  Double it if she has a kid / baby-daddy, etc.  You might in the end be glad she kept you at arm's length if something big was going on, and waited until she was available for fun again.  You're right about the feelings and concern.  But when I was close enough to a girl that she 'let me in' too all the goings on in her life, it ended up making me feel more sad and sorry for her and her family than attracted to her, not to mention it put me front and center as a potential source for help for all the various issues - well outside the normal allowance-and-play relationship.

And of course, there's the obvious possibility she's found someone else or just wanted to go cold-turkey off of the sugar lifestyle, but I wouldn't chalk it up to that after one round of bad communication, especially if you were close like you say.  Good luck and hope you get an answer if she's someone you were really concerned for.

Sorry to say, this is a standard tactic among millennials particularly....
They communicate almost exclusively on electronic devices, and dating apps are particularly fierce
in the 'swipe left and you're history' mode of dismissal.
You can often see them sitting together, what you don't know is that they are texting one another rather than speaking directly together. This creates, among other problems, a distinct inability to handle face-to-face communication, particularly when the topic is awkward...They prefer to handle things electronically (even breaking up a long-term relationship by text) and radio silence is understood to be an option.
So, if you want the sweet nectar of youth, get used to this phenomenon.
Some on this  board would say, return to this overflowing Bowl, keeping your rotation full of second-string options, even lining up several for a given window of opportunity, which thoroughly ameliorates the disappointment of a ghost or no-show.

Conversely, l have had several millennial SB's be consistently punctual, even early, and l note that they tend to be less BSC than the rest as well.

Yes, sir, being ghosted is part of the deal.  They haven’t any people skills, can’t face a problem or self perceived issue.  Just go get one of your other SB’s and  taste the young pootang and forget about being ghosted.  That girl will probably pop up again.  Enjoy the bowl.

The gentlemen ahead of me expressed all my thoughts very eloquently
Unfortunately, just had a SB  move in with me for two weeks since she had nowhere else to live
She carries on 3 hr facetime conversations with her friends
Almost a different reality that you and I would know.
Ghosting is almost just another way of expression.
otho, we are asking these girls to deviate from the norm...aka fucking old guys for an "arrangement"
Guess it just goes with the territory.

Thanks for all the good advice. It’s probably for the best if I don’t know too much about their personal life. It’s hard because I do believe that it’s easy to develop feelings for them. And that usually leads to extended discussions. After being married for over 25 years, I’m trying to make up for lost time by enjoying the company of many different beautiful young ladies. I must say I wish I had discovered the sugar bowl a long time ago. I just need to get better at removing the emotions.  

Just curious, have any of you ever transitioned a relationship to a non paid one?  I had one SB where we hit it off really well. From the first meeting she was always saying such nice things and it appeared to be sincere so I thought I would test the waters and ask if she would see me without the money. Of course you can guess the answer was no. Ha, it’s funny how fast they can turn. I understand the game, just thought I’d test it once and see if I could get surprised.

You had at least one BCD session before she ghosted on you.  
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I've had my share of ghosts just like any SD here. But with me,  I've seen more of it happening as a NSNC or just a "sorry, changed my mind" on the day of our M&G than our 1st scheduled BCD. A little about the two most egregious of these:  

1. There was a cute, shy 18 year old HS Senior who lives a half a mile from me and was desperate for cash (I mean seriously, right out of Penthouse Forum!). Met her at a local Starbucks, talked for about 45 minutes and she seemed into me and happy to close that night. Drove her to my place (a 4 minute trip) and brought her inside.  She immediately tensed up and just sat on the sofa looking at the floor. I tried to sit next her and put my hand on her shoulder and she looked terrified. So I just said, "hey, you're really not ready for this. Come on, I'll take you home."  Dropped her off at the end of her block and never heard from her again.  
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2. Got a message from a 27-ish blond built like trade show model semi-pro type (i.e.: Not as tight as a swimsuit model, but big tits, tiny waist, medium hips, big lips and big hair). Insisted in driving to my place from Hollywood asap (about a 40 min drive at 6 pm) and we agreed on the sugar.  At 7, she texts me she's arrived. I look out my door and can't see her car. But a minute later she walks up to my door. She puts one foot inside - literally one foot - and then turns around and says she forgot something in her car. I watch her walk away, knowing that would be the only look I would ever get at that very tasty looking ass... A few minutes go by and she texts me: "Sorry, I can't".  And that's it, Ghosted from there. The next day her profile disappeared or she blocked me.  
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The rest are mostly ghostings within one or two hours of a M&G.  I'd say it's about 15-25% of the M&G's I set up. But the rate definietly skews higher with younger SB's.

The SB I was most deeply emotionally connected to ghosted on me last year.  Two months went by without so much as a word and I had to consider that I'd never see her again.  Of course I kept busy with others during her absence.  But she finally texted me, apologized for going silent, said she was overwhelmed with difficulties, and let's pick up where we left off.  Which we did.  So don't worry about it too much.  There's simply no way of knowing if she gone permanently or not.

I had one I became very attached too.  We had 2 dates, then after winter break she told me she couldn’t do it anymore.  I was devistated.  Another one went radio silent about the same time, contacted me this past week when I responded she ghosted me again.  

I’m learning not to become emotionally involved.  I do have one who had become a friend with benefits and doesn’t charge.  Another one that just likes to give bbbj with cim nqns for free because she thinks it’s hot that I’m married, no charge.  

I do have a few new spinners that are young and amazing.  No emotion for me and it will work better.  

Can certainly relate to your experiences...had one SB ghost on me three times in three months!
She probably doesn't realize that with small twists, she repeats her performance each month:
--will text me early in the morning and send numerous hearts/kisses/etc emojis
--begs forgiveness and wants a meeting asap
--instant texting, no time between texts
--I'll text her a few hours later to finalize the time
--no matter what time I pick, she mentions she will be late by 1-2 hours
--takes about an hour to get a text back from her
--then she informs me she will need to bring her g/f (hot g/f so no problem!)
--about an hour  before the scheduled meeting, either her work suddenly calls her in, or she has to stay late  
--says can she come by 2-3 hours after our scheduled time (now pushing the meeting well past 9 pm)
--just for fun, I always say yes, and she ghosts...
--rinse, repeat...the following month    LOL

I think you mean a RL or SO relationship.  

When it comes to sex, you always pay, and often at higher rates than in the P4P world.  

And yes, it happens. My current wife is a former escort.

Thanks, all good stuff. I think if I were to define unicorn, that would be to get one like you have. Hot young thing who loves to give bbbj with cim nqns and no charge. Ya, that’s what I want.

Maybe if she wasn’t on FT for 3 hours she’d have her own.....eh, never mind...

...about guys not wanting to meet IRL, etc. In fact, had this happen last week. Tried to set up a Saturday meeting, aaannnd....nada. No response. Sigh.

Dude, You're going to end up with your picture up on that wall at Starbucks!!!

No worries, Tank. I checked her ID before I even sat down.  She had been 18 for 6 whole weeks.

If high school enters the conversation I am out.  I wouldn’t care if she turned 18 during her senior year I can see the wildfire starting.  She talks, kids find out, Adminisrator finds out, then..... well I don’t want to say it here and you’re looking from the wrong side of bars.

Exactly.
Fake ID's are everywhere, maybe short of seeing a passport...
Yeah, and as you adroitly mention, she says one negative thing to anyone of authority, LE will be in the picture instantly.
I recently parted with a 19 yo SB who semi-threatened to tell any number of folks that I served her alcohol at my place and took advantage of her while she was drunk.
Lesson learned!

It is ABSOLUTELY UNADVISABLE to even flirt with that line... IMHO you should have bolted when she said she was in high school (maybe give her Big Peter Johnson's #)

I have a hard stop at 21 and think that 19 and in college would have to be the minimum for any reasonable person...

I know some of the opinions I express on here are a bit whacky (by design) - but Herb I enjoy your posts so please don't fuck around with that strata of POT SBs it's not good business

You better hope her Daddy and his friends don’t come looking for you. The youngest SB I was with was 20 and in college plus she had enough social media to prove she was legal. They are not the most careful on birth control and they are not averse to going bareback.

But I do draw the line at high school. lol I don't care if she is a really dumb 28 year old still in high school, high school is a deal breaker. lol

 
I have seen a couple of 18 year olds over the last year or so, one of them already had a kid, so no guilt there. The other was in college and I know this for a fact as I always picked her up and dropped her off at the dorm.  

 
I can see a "reasonable person" having a higher cut off age of 19 or even 21, but when did anyone ever accuse me of being reasonable, but even I have lines I will not cross and if I am going to be fucking someone in high school, she better damn well be a teacher. lol

I'd expect nothing less from you...

I'm currently experiencing Ghosting well after the fact of meeting with 2 of my regulars.  One I have gone BCD with and the other we have almost gone BCD, but then medical emergency happened (I'm thinking, right... maybe).  I usually try to contact my SB's every two days or so with just a short message just to let them know I'm thinking about them.  Most of the time my text gets a response.  Lately - with two of my regulars currently, I'm now waiting 4 to 7 days with them not responding back at all.  Then when they do - they continue on like nothing has transpired.  The emotion I have is "it takes less than 5 seconds to text back anything", so I find myself hating this method of communication - but I digress.  I had jumped off SA, as I thought i had a stable of reliable SB's, but they can turn into Ghosts, or at least flakey in an instant.  Now I'm thinking I have to re-join SA to keep the pool filled.  

Have any others had an issue like this with regulars also?  

A follow-up question, on SA do you pay for longer term memberships, instead of their monthly amount?

Yeah, the texting thing, some years ago, I had my SO text me she wouldn't be seeing me anymore, as she wanted to see someone else.  Makes it easy on em.  I only do the monthly membership, and renew or not, depending on how it is going.

I hear you there - At this point I would relish a text that says anything - even if it was just "I'm done with you - bye".  That is at least some communication.  This ignoring that they even got my texts is like a big F-U saying I can't be bothered even responding to you.  If a SB or pot SB contacts me I at least take the time to say I'll be back to them later - busy now.  But, as other posters have said - that is what is in the pool - get used to it.