A few months ago, I set up a date with a Pot that ended up ghosting after she was texting me that she was on the road. We had talked over the phone and she seemed pretty legit. Late 20s single mom with a steady job. I ended up losing my annual free night’s hotel over it and was pretty pissed. Fast forward she contacted me over Seeking a couple days ago saying she wanted to reconnect and texted me on the same number that she did before. I asked for an explanation as to what happened last time and she gave me an apology which sounded relatively sincere but no explanation. She said she really wanted to meet soon and was available the next day. I set up a time to come to my place at 10 AM which she agreed to along with a 350 PPM (that has been my standard PPM). I sent her a text in the morning, which she responded to saying she was getting ready and looking forward to seeing me. At 9:09 she said it would take her about 28 minutes to come to my place and will call me before she hits the road. Did not hear anything after that.

 At noon, she frantically texts saying she was sorry she fell asleep and just woke up and would still want to come see me. She even tried calling which I ignored because I actually had another SB come over to satisfy my blue balls.  After the SB left, I responded over text sayingI left my place but would be willing to see her late tonight if she still wants to come. I also said it seemed like the universe does not want us to meet. She said she absolutely disagreed and wanted to come over and make it up to me. Shall we place bets on whether she shows up tonight?

And before anybody gets jealous, this last weekend I had a Pot come over and  beg me for the PPM upfront which, of course, I refused. But I told her was willing to give her a $50 deposit as a show of good Faith. She took it and ran out. I still got to feel her up so I would consider that a tip.

... That sucks to get ghosted twice, and to have to deal with a cash-n-dash runner.  I can't fault you for offering the $50 up front. I would have done the same thing in your place. In fact, I have done the same thing. LOL  

 
The double ghost is just sad - for her. It shows a lack of respect for you and a lack of understanding that her actions - as well as lack of actions - have consequences.  And the lame "I overslept" excuse just makes it worse.  

 
Let's analyze this excuse a bit.  
- She planned to meet you at 10:00 am.  
- She presumably went to bed the night before knowing she has a 10:00 am meeting scheduled.  
- She woke up well before 10:00 am and presumably started getting ready.  
- She was obviously awake at 9:09 am to acknowledge your confirmation text and let you know the required drive time. - Then - for some unknown reason - SHE FELL ASLEEP knowing she needed to leave her place in less than 30 minutes.  
It's pretty easy to call BS on that.  

 
I've heard the "overslept" excuse many times before, and the good news is it's a gift to you. The gift is letting you know before you spent any more cash on her that she's not serious about dating you, needing cash from you, or making a commitment to an ongoing arrangement with you.  

 
Will you allow her to beg for another chance?  Will you ask for additional concessions first? Like less allowance, longer time, or additional activities?  She may well agree to these, but you already know she won't deliver. Why? She has already shown that the $350 allowance for BCD as agreed is not enough motivation to ensure she shows up.  If you want to ask her for even more as an inducement to get you to agree, she's even less likely to show up.  Think of it from her perspective:  

- You offer $350 for a (presumably) one-shot BCD. She agrees at first but then backs out (for "reasons").  
- You make the same offer and she agrees at first but then backs out (for presumably the same "reasons").  
- You offer the same allowance but ask for more from her to "make up" for past no-shows.  
- She may agree at first, but she's already told you (through her no-show) that $350 is not enough.  
- So asking her to do even more for the same $350 will fail.  

 
I think you know that it's time to leave that bridge behind you, for now. No point in burning it down, of course. But no point in hoping she will cross over to you either.  

 
Life is good

 
The Cat

My Spidey sense tells me that:

A) The boyfriend came over for a quickie.
B) (One of) Her other SD made a better offer.

Sorry for the headache.

Did you report her profile to SA or SDM?  Feel free to call her out here so others know not to fall for her BS

The unreliable behavior and BS excuses are pretty typical in this lifestyle. It's a constant aggravation. I'd resist the temptation to try to salvage such time wasters. As The Cat so amply points out, she's not likely to deliver the goods at any price.

 
As The Cat further points out, she's disrespectful of your time and unreliable. She's not going to bring any level of quality of comfort to your life, and her behavior shows she's not interested in getting the same from you.  

 
Many of these girls are simply delusional. Their selfish behavior is the opposite of what the sugar dynamic should be. They are truly blind to the benefit of having a caring, fun SD to enjoy time with and provide them with emotional, physical and financial support. Indeed, it seems many of these girls are sadly masochistic to deny themselves a better quality of life with someone willing to provide for them. In my view that's tragic and sad but this is the world we live in.  

 
Thankfully there are a select few that do value a good SD that supports them in a way they could never find in plain vanilla dating.  

 
It's a continuing challenge to have to deal with erratic behavior, liars, thieves, inconsiderate time wasting women who play games and create constant frustration and headaches in order to find one that brings us joy and elevates our lives.  

 
On the other side of the coin there are a lot of genuine caring SB's that have to deal with the same kind of behavior from the many bogus SD's in the dynamic who are also selfish predators, so I think it's a human problem, not just one of gender.  

 
On avoiding cash and dash and no-shows, one can never eliminate it entirely, but better vetting at the M&G might be the best precaution; these girls you describe sound like hookers/SW's who are looking for quick cash. Most average SB's truly looking for an SD are going to want to get to know you at least a little better before agreeing to a hotel meet.  

 
The struggle is real.

So she did in fact show up last night for a decent BCD. She said she actually had a migraine that morning, which is why she ended up falling asleep. To be Frank I believe her because she struck me as a genuine flaky person (got lost walking from her car for example) who is just trying to do her best. She even asked for Excedrin or Advil because the migraine hadn’t gone away entirely. BCD was good, but not excellent. We did only have one pop and then she had to leave purportedly to pick up her son who was complaining that he didn’t want to stay with his grandma as originally intended. If it Was a  ruse, it was a very impressive one as she talk to her son in front of me to try to convince him to stay.  

I will probably not see her but who knows. All in all I’d give it a solid seven out of 10 experience as she was OK going bear (we exchanged test results) though I did have to pull out even though she was on birth control.  

PS the girl who scammed me already got removed from Seeking (probably because she scammed others). I don’t remember her scream name but she said her name was Gabi and she is mixed half Eritrean half Dominican. In retrospect her Cash App was “it’s really me” another red flag.      

7 out of 10 when not feeling well isn't too bad.  If you can get her to be more consistent may be worth the time.  Depending on your rotation.