I have been burnt once when I tried to pay partial allowance in advance, and since then I have stuck with the p4p approach barring a few times when I knew the SB will see me again without asking for more cash next time. Now I met this great 23yo who is a solid 8 and has her own apartment to host. We met for coffee and then met a couple of times at her place. She kept on insisting on monthly allowance and while I like her a lot; my guard won't go down easy and I just gave her some allowance to justify the meets. After our first great session of sex, she insisted on starting with monthly payment right away as she assumed that I was ok with it. I told her that while I was ok with it in long run, I will need to at least split it first month. She told me that she feels like she was used as her perception was that I agreed on monthly. And I told her that my perception was that she was ok with me splitting it first month. Anyways, too much arguing on allowance made me feel sick. But I did like her so after she kept insisting, I told her to go downstairs of her apartment building to get some cash from the ATM. Now as luck will have it, the ATM was down for maintenance, so I sent her a screenshot and walked away. She texted me back to come and go with her to another ATM as she wants me to be her SD but she will only do it on monthly term. I told her that let us sleep on it.
Tbh I liked her and would have gone with monthly, but it seems now we both lost trust in each other and I should just move along. What do you guys think?

-- Modified on 8/22/2017 9:46:52 AM

Move on

It's one thing to negotiate. It's another to equivocate and make her think you are ok with monthly while trying not to actually commit.  

There is no way you should commit to any financial arrangement unless it meets your specific needs. There is risk of moving to allowance or any cash in advance.  

The last time I got burned on this, I had already fucked her at my place 4 times and she was rocking my world.  She asked for $400 two days in advance of our next session to cover some over due bills and I ponied up.  Then, she did an awesome Road Runner imitation by disappearing with nothing but a small cloud over my bed where her pussy was supposed to be.  Total cut off and radio silence. Never answered a text, email or message on SA.  Just shut me off.  Her profile is still active.  

You need to decide if this SB is salvageable. If you do, tell her specifically that you are not yet ready to go monthly. When you are ready, you will work out the details with her. Until then you both have been getting what you want and so why not continue to build mutual trust and mutual fun?  

No doubt you are competing with at least one other SD in her area.  So be prepared for her to bail on you for some SD with a bigger wallet and smaller balls.

but some of you guys really need to grow a pair and "Just say no"

 
It's not that hard and eliminates all this drama and back and forth about paying in advance for pussy. Paying a hooker in advance is stupid, so is paying an SB. You obviously already know this or you would have already forked over the money. So your problem isn't brains, it's balls. Grow a pair of balls and simply tell her that you are NOT going to pay her an month in advance, blame it on "trust issues" or simple common sense. Honestly, you are a grown ass man allowing a 23 year old girl to dictate terms to you.

She was texting this morning that she will see me again if I am ok with two monthly payments, giving about 60% in advance and then 40% half way into the month.
I have not replied.

Tell her you are back to pay per meet because all of this negotiation is annoying you.  

It is not really about how much you give her. It's more about who is dictating the terms.  Honesty, if her monthly is so low I could get it out of an atm, I could be fine with paying ahead as long as I trusted her and I felt I liked her enough. Of course, I would still insist on paying the 3rd or 4th week because it coincides with paychecks or whatever. Bottom line is, it should always be on the guy's terms because there are a shit ton of SBs out there and they're pretty much a commodity. It'll stay that way as long as we're not tools.

I have several different bank accounts, almost every one of them with it's own ATM card. I have most of them set to a $1,500 max per day, but one of them is set at $2,000.  The days of being limited to only a few hundred bucks from an ATM are long over.

 
That little item aside, I agree with the rest of what you said. The spineless "tricks" here on TER have already caved where it comes to hookers and if left up to the likes of them the same will happen in the Sugar Bowl with POT SB's claiming that it's "rude and disrespectful" to negotiate. Don't be "that guy", we owe it to each other not to be pushed around by college kids that "demand" that we pay them a certain way. There is so much fucking pussy out there, it makes no sense for a grown ass man to be led around by his dick.

That's totally new to me. I have some big bank accounts but thought the limits were all 800 or even 400.  

2000 a month could be justifiable if she's hot enough and you're banging her about 10 times a month but I'd be bored out of my mind.  

To the OP, what is she asking and what market are you in?

Why would you want to bang the same girl 10 times a month in the Sugar Bowl? There are so many SB's out there that you can see a different one each week if you can afford it. Money is tight tight now I only see a different one every month.

The OP is from the DC area if you look at his review history. The hot ones ain't cheap in the DC area; 400-500 per meet.

Most banks are 1K but there are a number at 2K.  

I always tell them that trust has to be earned, one date at a time.  I have never successfully created an arrangement with a SB who demanded payment up front. Those that ask for a monthly allowance in advance get the trust story, plus I tell them I've been burned.  Usually they are quick to say yes to a ppm arrangement.  If not, I move on. If they go for the ppm, they are often mopre eager to visit me when I ask since they know they are going to get some more money.  Works best for everyone.

But here's another approach that has worked for me.  I tell those asking for a monthly allowance that it is too restrictive and limits their freedom and independence.  They will feel obligated to date me even if they don't really feel like it, which sucks. And I will feel obligated to date them since I've already paid them for it.  But with a gift per visit style of allowance we both know we are there because we both are really eager to be there, no prior coercion involved.  Keeps everything fresh. This explanation has worked for me.

DC area and we settled for 2.5K a month for meeting twice a week on an average plus she has her own apartment so no hotel expense. But a girl can always change her mind later once you pay upfront, so I prefer to split payments at least in the beginning until trust is established. She is hot, sex is great and our schedules matched. However, too much pressure for monthly did not work well for me. I told her that I can only see her on per meet basis initially and she declined. So I have moved on, I always have a line up anyways.

I tell them the same stuff like trust concerns and actually been burnt for real so it's not just a story, lol. I know girls want some stability as tons of SDs just meet them once and move on. And some ask for a very high price for just the first date these days like 500-700. I am talking with one very hot 20yo who started with 700 and then came down to 500 for first meet with subsequent meets at 400. But I have to consider hotel expenses too There is another 23yo who is probably just a 6 but willing to meet for 200 per meet. And there are ones who want to start with a few dates before they commit for intimacy. Sugar bowl can be lot of hard work, lol.

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