The message below included a link to some visual media. As the moderator, I chose to exclude it and instead point to an older thread we have had on the same topic.

Rape Fantasy
Posted by Colonel Walter E. Kurtz, 8/10/2008 12:42:21 PM  

I would never hurt a women and I would definitely not consider raping a women. However, I do find videos of rape, like the one below which is hopefully simulated, to be erotic.

Is that wrong?

I don't know; is my attraction to a video depicting a rape the same as a rape fantasy? I personally have no desire to control or hurt anyone during sex, but I like to watch it on video. However, if I encountered a rape happening in real life I think I would try to assist the victim by kicking her attacker in the nuts.

And you can be attracted to any kind of fantasy, as long as you realize that some fantasies are not optimally translated into reality - at least not like in these videos.

Also, let's not forget that many commercially produced images incorporate carefully calculated fantasy elements. Indeed, I think you would react differently if you witnessed sexual violence perpetuated toward someone in your environment.

But wrong? No, I don't think so. As discussed in the thread, many women also have rape fantasies, complete with hunky Fabio "I can't believe it's not butter" ripping their clothes off in the most forceful manner. But these imaginations always takes something into account - a willing "victim". Heck, I'd like to sign up for being raped by Jim Morrison, Johnny Depp...and even Mick Jagger...where do we old hippe mamas line up?

Let me know if your fantasies get more persistent or intrusive, though,
the Love Goddess

Mick Jagger??? Somehow doesn't quite fit with the other two.

Hell, I'm old and skinny, even got some wrinkles, but I can't seem to sing worth a damn. Guess I haven't got a shot, huh?

I repeatedly have this fantasy. Not so much of an actual "rape" which I find vile and disgusting but the act of a man taking control, forcing me to limits I would not normally concede to and being the aggressor in a situation.

I have a few gentlemen who have discussed this type of fantasy with me and because I trust them I have enjoyed some very erotic times with them.

None of them has ever hurt me, done something I did not want them to do or actually "raped" me. However, I did maintain a safe word if I ever felt that it was getting out of hand.

It is not odd to have these types of fantasies. I am naturally very dominant in life but actually very submissive in the bedroom. Finding someone you can share your fantasies with is what this "job" is all about.

Good luck.

~Rae

Here's the thing.  If you are having urges to savagely rape women you do not know, and who really are not consenting to the situation beforehand... urges that are difficult to keep in check... then perhaps it is time to reach out for help -- get some counseling, talk to a trusted confidante, something along those lines.

However, that does not seem to be the case in your situation.  If the lines of fantasy and reality are not blurred for you, then you are just fine.

A very close friend of mine has fantasies of this nature.  He is the mildest, sweetest young man you could ever meet -- truly.  These fantasies really disturbed him, because they were the antithesis of who he really is, and how he really feels about women.  However, in my opinion, I can understand why any man would have these fantasies.. how HOT would it be to have complete dominion over a woman's body, whether or not she has given it to you?  How hot would it be to do whatever you wanted to a woman without needing to ask her, or to pay her... you could just take it from her.  Rawr.  I should stop now, because I am getting myself all wound up (though I fantasize from the other position, that of the victim).

Anyway, in summation, you are perfectly normal.

and acting out these fantasies with a consenting partner, is that still, if she says "no" "don't" or "stop" the play must end. And yet how can you play the role without those words?

-- Modified on 11/15/2008 10:40:27 AM

This is very interesting because if I "go" there in my mind as the "victim",  I have thoughts and fantasies of homicide and torture directed at the rapist. So intense and vivid. Is that normal?

Yes, famkejensen,

but is the fantasy of homicide and torture a sexual one, or one of revenge because of your putative victim-status? If it is a revenge fantasy, then welcome to the club of zillions of people who have them - and sometimes for good reason!

But if you get SEXUALLY excited by killing the rapist in your fantasy, then I'd say you are probably in a minority of female (I assume) fantasizers who get sexually excited from torture and homicide. Is that normal? Well, that's just the point of fantasies. Many of them are not "normal" in the word's most used sense. Do they occur? Surely. Among women? Probably less so. In addition, most cultures, patriarchal that they are, do not support images of women enjoying homicide for sexual reasons, images of dominatrixes VAGUELY notwithstanding. And of course, if you talk to a real-life dom, she will tell you instantly that she is NOT into causing sadistic torture EVER. Most images of women kicking the butt of the rapist/perp are done in a more "righteous" and "moral" vein, where the victim gets final justice. But getting sexed up over it? Hmm...haven't seen that one yet...but it doesn't mean that it's not coming!

It is when people act out their fantasies that problems occur. As long as you get sexually excited by thinking of decimating the rapist in your head, no one can censure it. Although I'd be willing to say that if you told people openly that this was a big turn-on of yours, they might withdraw or express revulsion of some kind.

And if it's revenge...believe me, it's in all our heads. Personally, I could think of a few people in our current administration that I'd like to waterboard..but before there's a big hue and cry.. IT'S A FANTASY ONLY!!!!

P.S. Check out the link...I take everything back, LOL....

Luvya, Russ Meyer,
the Love Goddess











-- Modified on 8/13/2008 2:01:05 PM

my erotic fantasies often involve torture and murder, however from the perspective of the victim only. i fantasize about being violently raped and tortured beyond the breaking point, to the point of my death which delights and arouses my Rapist/s greatly. to be a sort of human sacrifice for someone else's perversion, to suffer to the point of hysteria, then finally a numbness and a lack of desire for life. i never have any feelings of anger or hatred toward my Rapist in these fantasies.

i'm sure it's a strange fantasy for a woman, but then i've never been accused of being normal.

It doesn't happen often, but I sometimes have fantasies about getting even with those who have trespassed against me. Thumb screws seem to be my weapon of choice in these fantasies.

As a matter of fact, lilli,

versions of your fantasy are common among women, although the details may vary. What is NOT common among women is to derive sexual gratification from a fantasy involving the woman becoming homicidal and torturous in retribution for rape.

Let us all remember that fantasies are what a lot of sexual excitement is made of, regardless of their content. And the more any of us indulge in fantasizing, even writing about them to ourselves and/or others, the more it becomes clear that they are fantasies that spice up our sex lives. It's only when you try to push your fantasies away, for fear of guilt or shame, that they become even more overwhelming and, unfortunately for some, can become a dangerous reality. So go ahead folks, FANTASIZE AWAY...as long as you don't confuse any of them with reality, it's OK...

Mantra for the day, I guess,
the Love Goddess

Not sexual at all, but the rush I get when imagining the things I want to do is quite powerful...and I have only told one person and they respectfully suggested I keep quiet. Thanks for your input.

How interesting...my vote goes to imobilizing my target and inserting a curling wand into his ass, turning it on and walking away for a nice lunch with friends.

I have played out scenarios something like this.  I have yet to get the opportunity to play out a truly hardcore rape scenario (I wish!), but I have been "threatened" with a large knives and taken on a few occasions.

In a situation like this, before the roleplay begins, it is best to choose on a safe word that is NOT along the lines of "no," "don't," or "stop."  ANYthing will work.  Like.. "cucumbers!" or... "ZOINKS!"  Seriously, anything will work.  Just be sure it's not anything like "please," "stop," "that hurts," etc.