Love Goddess,

Please forgive me if this has already been covered.  I see that there have been many RE related questions, but haven't seen my exact issue.

I have trouble reaching orgasm from oral.  One orally gifted provider is able to bring me to orgasm twice in an hour with a BBBJ - so I know it is possible.  Is this not uncommon and, if so, can you give me some guidance on how I can better instruct my dates on how to do this for me?

Well, BJ-RE,

BJ's are as individual as the penises they aim to suck! Being "orally gifted" is always helpful though...since some gents do feel that their tender members are sometimes handled a little too...how shall we say...enthusiastically?

Blowjobbing is an art and some women are just better at it than others. As for successrates, well, there aren't any. But clearly, you should instruct any provider who aims to please you orally on what makes you erupt. Some women need to help out manually, or sometimes vary their pace and pressure. What I find that some men do NOT like is when there is too much handjobbing in addition to blowing, i.e. when the pressure is too hard and the hand is whizzing up and down the penis like a freefall ride at an amusement park. Actually, many men enjoy semi-firm pressure and slower, rhythmic handmotions, combined with lots of saliva and deep plunges inside the mouth. Others don't want any hands at all and just want the woman to lie down while they literally thrust themselves in and out to simulate p-v sex.

There are all kinds of ways to go about this and no man OR woman is the same in their talents and preferences. The more you communicate in advance (don't worry, it can be done very seductively), the better your chances to enjoy yourself in those final moments. And, of course, read the reviews. Some women are real BJ stars. One last comment: if we're talking covered here, it's way more of a challenge for both parties than if it's bareback, although I certainly understand the risk factor.

To each his own on this one,
the Love Goddess

Well said LG!

I'll be honest with everyone.  In my life, I've only achieved orgasm through a BJ 3 times in my entire life.  It is extremely difficult for me to cum during oral sex.  Often times, it's because the lady is either too rough, but most of the time I think it's because for me personally there's too much attention on me.  I know that sounds bizarre and strange, but I normally prefer giving and having all the attention on me just doesn't get me anywhere.  I don't know if this makes any sense to anyone, but it's just the way it is for me.

When and where I grew up, girls did NOT give head.  It was taboo and considered 'dirty.'  When I got older (and the hell OUT of there)and encountered women who freely (or for $$) sucked me, I had much difficulty cumming.  The taboo of it all had made it VERY erotic to me other edge of the sword was that I couldn't 'let go' and cum in a woman's mouth.  
I'm happy to say I'm MOSTLY over all that but it did seem to have a lot to do with having 'permission' to ejaculate in her mouth.  At first the only girls that could get me off (most of the time) were providers - after all 'bought and paid for' is quite a bit of permission.  Then some women were very aggressive and made it clear that they wanted it - BINGO.  
Even now a new civvie friend may have trouble getting me to cum if I havent gotten the sense that she truly wants it.  
Funny, I've advised a couple of female friends that were frustrated NOT being able to get thier lovers off to (as sexily as possible) simply TELL him that they wanted it.  It seems to have worked well for them too.
Best of luck
MVR

I never thought I would see the day when a blow job would be the best part of a sex romp for me or my preferred way to climax but it has happend over the last couple of years.  It is all due to the efforts of a few ladies who really understand that a good BJ is in fact art!

My ATF says that she loves to get guys off with her mouth because she feels like she has more control over what happens. I'm more than happy to surrender complete control in this instance.

Thanks Love Goddess.

I've been a hobbiest long enough that my BJ completion rate is less than 1%.  It's statistically impossible for me not to have run into multiple "orally gifted" ladies, which means that it's probably my issue.  

With a cover, the only chance a woman has is a disguised HJ.  The porn style visuals and dirty talk don't do anything for me physically.  Too much action makes things worse, not better and aggressive action is a complete non-starter.  Without a cover, it takes my one special friend 15 minutes of steady action to make it happen.  Could it be that I'm just being unrealistic and that everyone takes 15+ minutes?

P.S.  Your wisdom on this board would have saved me a lot of other frustration when I started many years ago.  Thanks for being part of this community.

I think fifteen minutes is darn good!  It takes me a lot longer than that pretty much all the time. And CBJ? Fuggetaboutit. Not gonna happen!

Jeez Louise,

15 minutes IS NOTHING! Some men get into an almost hypnotic trance from BJ's and can go for HOURS (the record is 6 hours, yes folks, talk about cottonmouth, LOL), so it's all about how YOU personally relate to the sensation.

OTOH, don't push yourself. Not everyone has to be enamored by BJs. If you don't like it, why deal with it? There are zillions of other things to do sexually. But, like I said before, if the music's right, then the provider will easily blow you for 30 minutes or more. Heck, some ONLY love giving BBBJs, bless their little hearts. So it's up to you to decide...15 minutes...child's play, LOL.

Oral fixations, hallelujah,
the Love Goddess

I am an Oral Specialist...guys come to me for different reasons...not only for pleasure but also because they have dysfunctions.

When I meet clients for the first time, I can actually predict how long is going to take me to make them orgasm.

Soon I touch their penises with my hands and wrap my lips around, I can feel what's going on with them and why they came to visit me.

When I notice certain things about their genitals, I ask some basic questions and usually I hear them saying "oh I don't know why I am not able to finish orally" or "oh I cum too fast".

Sometimes they don't even have to say anything...I am the one telling them and is funny to see their faces asking me "how do you know???"

See, penises are not made equal, they are all different...but, they "act" in a specific way depending on your genetic background.

If you are a healthy man, not taking any drugs, probably what you think is a "problem" is nothing but genetics.

I could elaborate more but, not knowing you, is hard for me to guess.

Mail to me if you want to discuss any further.






-- Modified on 10/8/2008 12:38:22 AM

That every guy requires a stimulation in their own unique way.

You would be surprised but some providers think us guys are exact replicas of one another. We all function differently with a diverse range of preferences.    

What it takes to make client A orgasm may be the complete opposite for client B.

If the start of an erection in a 1 and ejaculation is a 10, then only one lady has ever gotten me past 3 with a BJ alone regardless of time.  I am no purist and appreciate some light HJ, but the only BJ finishes (other than my one) is more HJ with some licking.  I've seen Betty, who is a true oral specialist with great attitude in my quest for a happy outcome to my issue, and even then I needed more hand than oral.

I have clearly not pushed the limit on time.  Missionary, doggie, cowgirl, etc. with a lovely lady is much more pleasurable to me than a dead end BJ and less likely to create lockjaw for her.

I really appreciate the input from Love Goddess, Betty and others and look forward to the quest for the next oral specialist that can solve my riddle.  Betty, do share your genetic thoughts as I think the world would be a better and more peaceful place with your wisdom.

Here is my take on things. While I don't claim to be an oral specialist one thing I am is eager.  I really really love to give oral to a man, especially if he can last a while. I do not believe that "15 minutes" is a long time to administer a bj.

I personally have given bj's that have lasted upwards to an hour or one was even 90 minutes. Not of complete and constant mouth to penis action but a combination of lips, tongue and hands.

I really like to give oral. Did I say that already? And there are certain gentlemen who come see me because they know that and they last a long long time. Whether it is because it feels so good I do not know. I would assume that is the case.

However, I can not say why YOU in particular can not cum easily from a bj, but just so you know I do not believe after two years in the business and several partners before I began that fifteen minutes is a long time.

The average bj for me usually lasts about 20 minutes. I don't always get gentlemen off like that, by choice. I like to extend the pleasure and for me, a bj is and always will be foreplay to the real thing.

One of my most memorable appointments to date was a gentleman who only wanted a "porn star blow job". I worked him over for about 45 minutes before making him release.


You sound very considerate. You sound like the kind of lover who doesn't want to make his partner "work" too hard for something that you see as a problem. What you may not know is that a lot of women like giving bj's and have no problem giving one for an extended period of time. The only time I have ever given a bj and given up is if the gentleman has:

1. Run completely out of time.
2. Is as limp as a noodle and nothing will bring it back to life.


Chin up I believe you will be able to achieve an O with bj if you rearrange your thoughts on making a lady work too hard or get lock jaw. Even after a full day or work on tour I've never gotten lock jaw.


Good Luck!

Rae Monroe

I will post my theory later today...I've been a bit busy

is going to be a long post, so I need time to write.

xoxoxo

Betty

-- Modified on 10/10/2008 8:21:42 AM

if you ever visit the DC area '  Cheers - Gregory

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