have never been able to have someone take me to completion this way without supplying my on hand at some point, any thoughts?

correction-bbbjcimtc

am assuming you mean your own hand also?

Dear johnny,
Well, if it's really NEVER, as you say in your post, then it really means that it's been your M.O. until this very day...and why worry about it...if it feels good to you? Does it? We could speculate on various theories, but ultimately, this is the science of doing, not being. So my concrete advice to you is to get your penis sucked over and over again, by whoever you feel is the appropriate person to do it, and then note carefully if anything changes. You know, it's not a sin to get the laying of the hands upon the holy staff to consummate the final act It could be that you need that extra vigorous stimulation for the home stretch. There is absolutely nothing unusual with that. But what happens during intravaginal sex? Are you able to ejaculate at some point or do you need to pull out and self-stimulate? And are you wearing a condom at all times, or does it come off at some point?
All these variables, jonny storm. Once again, the best thing to do is to perform the experiment over and over again, change one or two things (the variables)and take careful mental notes, or written, if you prefer. It sounds like a great project. All you need to worry about is if it feels good to you. If it does, do more of it. If it doesn't, do something else. And don't worry about what others say or do. YOU are the main star of this production and that's the only thing that matters.

Happy sucking and fondling,
the Love Goddess

only during a bj does it not happen,maybe because it was/is frowned upon by my wife i cannot relax to let it happen? or maybe because i am very in control as far as showing any kind of emotional outbursts? just my nature

My dear johnny,
needless to say, if your wife frowned on bbbj (how sad..)and you eventually got emotionally affected, then yes, you might have a hard time relaxing into it. As for being in control and not showing emotional outbursts..hmm...there are people who are very controlled on the outside but very rowdy once you get them in bed. So..yes, it might be your nature. Paradoxically speaking, I try not to seek too many psychological causes for sexual predilections and preferences, because sometimes people put themselves in knots for no reason. We've become so accustomed as therapists to always look for emotions behind the actions, when in some cases, there are none! It's just the way someone is wired, physiologically. On the other hand, if you want to address the control issue during emotional outbursts, that's an entirely different question and surely grist for the therapeutic mill. But then we're not talking sex anymore.

The real question is, does it bother you to finish that way? Is it an unfulfilled wish to get BBBJTCIM without the manual finish? If it doesn't, then keep things as they are. If it does, then, like I said, experiment. Find a woman with whom you can let go and trust. Make sure you find your surroundings relaxing and then go for it. It might take a few tries, but the journey to get there will be oh so enjoyable!

Have fun trying,
the Love Goddess

it is an unfulfilled wish, if anyone has any suggestions such as a specific provider please let me know! i will keep trying

I've done to MANY guys who have the same problem as you.

Many things are the cause of it...every person is different and is hard to find out in a forum like this.

I have my own theories about oral, but I don't want to say why you can't because I need to see you in person, talk, touch and feel your body reactions to my techniques...so, I can make it happem.

If you ever visit any of the places where I go, contact me.

You will not be disappointed, I promise it.

xoxoxoxo

Betty

-- Modified on 5/24/2006 10:11:02 PM

thanks for replying, will keep it in mind