Have had a few bad experiences in the past with SB's who seemed somewhat normal but who later went off the rails. Since I'm unable to do an in-depth psychological evaluation on POTS I must rely on my  spidey-senses and logic to determine if a POT SB is mentally stable enough to engage in [and sustain] a healthy SR.  

 
Problem is, deeply hidden emotional issues can lie dormant till triggered. [Road rage comes to mind]. Once triggered, these issues can take the form of dangerous, toxic, destructive behavior.  

 
I've found sexual relationships, particularly ones with financial elements attached can trigger a shitload of emotional problems. Once triggered, a mentally unbalanced gal who feels maligned can become hell-bent on a path of vengeance.  

 
This is why it's important to me to keep my private life private. That means no ID, no real names, keep personal details like workplace and social media activity off limits. Everyone has their own style and boundaries, but these are mine.    

 
We've all heard of the horror stories from women about partners, ex-boyfriends, husbands who became crazed and went on a campaign to terrorize them. Can you say 'restraining order?' Women do it to men, too. Sometimes the results can be fatal. One season of 20/20 can keep a guy celibate for weeks.    

 
If I get any indication a POT is a little 'off' I end it. Self-centered, preoccupied, narcissistic behavior is usually the first sign I notice of someone who is not mentally balanced. Continued tardiness and cancellations are often another sign of instability. If she doesn't react well to an honest discussion about these things I gently end the arrangement. [VERY gently!]  

 
All people can exhibit similar behaviors and it doesn't always mean they are bat-shit crazy. But I've seen a lot of signs like this that sent up a yellow flag and ended up regretting my tolerance. In the past I've accepted these shortcomings in an SB because she is hot and I've justified acceptence of such behavior as 'the cost of doing business.' Big mistake.  

 
Some of the hottest women I've ever been with bordered on well-disguised lunacy and my going along for the ride [I call it 'riding the bucking bronco'] resulted in a great deal of emotional and physical turmoil I would have been better off without.  

 
Now I am extremely careful in my vetting. I try to explore potential issues with her in our initial conversations. How has she handled break-ups in the past? Has she ever been a victim of sexual abuse? Does she have a history of attracting unstable men? Has she ever been to prison or confined to a mental institution? [Add your question here!]  

 
While it's impossible to predict if a POT is mentally fit for a sexual relationship simply by asking questions, at least I can make an effort to find out a bit more about her past and her mental state.  

 
I'd like to hear from some of my brothers on this topic.  

 
1] Do you accept crazy behavior from a POT or SB and ride the bucking bronco as you stick your dick in crazy?

 
2] Do you have any vetting strategies that have successfully uncovered unstable potential land mines?

 
3] Have you developed any mitigation techniques that have calmed a potentially explosive SB from going into full melt-down mode?  

I totally agree with these thoughts. In my experience, if there is anything that raises a red flag in the texting phase or the meet and greet phase, it’s just not worth it. It takes so much time and energy when everything is going right, when everything doesn’t go right it just makes it all that much harder. Basically my answer is trust the voice inside your head that says there might be something wrong with the arrangement.

As I'm reading your post, I find my mind wandering down two paths at the same time:  

 
First, I've seen my share of issues that were lurking under the surface emerge, sometimes at the worst possible time (like when you are seconds from nutting in her!).   From buried child abuse, to addiction, to massive debt, to trust issues and more, I've seen SB's who (seemingly) randomly decide to punish me for the past acts of others, including themselves. This, for lack of a better term, sucks.  

 
But at the same time, I'm remembering that guy we all knew in high school or college. You know... the guy who was always banging the hottest chicks with minimal effort and then tossing them away with their used condoms. And they somehow managed to slip out of the inevitable drama unscathed. Then it's wash, rinse, repeat; all too often with the bestie of the last girl!  

 
In college, that guy was one of my closest friends. I recall asking him one time after he had burned a particularly gorgeous babe (Cheerleader, perky boobs, great smile, wild child...) by banging her younger sister why he does it, besides the obvious. He gave me an obvious answer, of course: The crazier the chick, the better the sex.  

 
I have tried and tried to put the lie to that claim. I have yet to do so.  

 
Now if you've read my posts over the last few years, you know I have walked away from SB's once I see those issues rise out of the seas of the past. The hottest SB I've ever had (21, now 24, half Filipino, half Italian, 5'2, 96 lbs, D-cups and SKILLED) was molested by her father from ages 8 to 14. When I eventually learned about this, I ended the arrangement and told her I needed her to know that she is worthy of love from an older man without the need to have sex. And I still see her every couple of months now. We talk about her life, and I coach her on career skills, as well as serving as an acid-test for the guys she meets either on the site or in her personal life. Frankly it almost kills me since she is SOOO hot. But I just can't be the guy that perpetuates the sins of her father and destroys her sense of self-worth and self-respect.  

 
To answer your specific questions:  
1. I do not accept crazy behavior, but I do call it out gently and calmly. I talk about her behavior, never her "attitude." I explain what I will do if it continues, I never "tell her" what to do.  
2. Vetting strategies? I'm not phycologist and I'm not about to try to diagnose anyone. But like #1, I do evaluate behaviors in light of my past experiences. If she seems to be heading down a path that spikes my Spidey Sense, I proceed with either caution, or I just GTFO!  
3. Mitigation techniques? Like #1, I observe behavior and if I think it's problematic, I will set aside time to ask her what's up? Again, I only discuss observed behaviors, never attitude. never accusing, just mentioning what I saw and let her know how it affects me.  Then I let her know what I will do if it persists and I ask her how I can help.  It's all standard conflict de-escalation and resolution like all those corporate "team building" trainings we've all done.  

 
But yeah, the likelihood is that once the crazy shows up hard, it's the beginning of the end.  

 
Life is good

 
The Cat

Most of the women wanting to be a SB are crazy.  They know it's low-key prostitution.  They know they are exchanging attention and sex for money.  Even though it's not a business exchange, there is a value there.

Going in, they are in a position of weakness.  They are usually needing the money more than we need sex and attention.  From my perspective, I am looking to date hot women that I like spending time with.  I don't mind helping with bills and getting their lives straight.  But I do expect there to be value brought to my life as well.

Lessons learned
1. She starts to go crazy call her on it.
2. She keeps going crazy cut it.  I put up with my ex SB of almost 4 years for far too long.
3. Stick to value.  She wants more you get more.  I have a returning SB that wants $800 a date.  But we spend a whole day and overnight together.  Unlimited sex.  Day trips.  And she's actually a very sweet woman to know.  10/10 in looks.  Huge boobs.  She understood, she needs to do more to get more.  It was $500 for 3-4 hours now it's 800 for 8-12 hours.
4.  Keep to your standards.  They are going to fuck up and ask daddy for help.  If it gets too much call her on it.  She either starts showing up for longer dates, next is free, or she doesn't get support.

While I don't normally advocate for any invasion of privacy, if/when I start meeting at their apartment, I always peek in the medicine cabinet when I get a chance. There's some truth in there sometimes.

I tend to agree with the the OP, I have followed my little soldier into battle many times knowing I was fucking a crazy person. Those crazy chicks are the best fucks. As I get older I want stability though, so I try to avoid the nut cases now.

I would agree that the majority of SBs are at the least odd, if not downright crazy, or have at least some issues going on.

There are completely sane ones out there though.  My only long term SBs were all pretty sane - I can't deal with crazy/odd. The other SBs I cut out, or cut themselves out, always had some issues. As an example of a sane one, my first long term SB was a very smart masters student at a leading university. She knew exactly what she was doing,  where she was going, and had her life completely together. No drugs or abuses, no tattoos, not needy - she was in it for some extra spending money on the side. She was not odd, not crazy,  was active in conservative politics, and church going. But she and a couple of others were exceptions -  I think the proportion of crazies is increasing.

They're all damaged.  Just a matter of degrees and if it's crazy fun or crazy clusterfuck  time.

There's a lot of food for thought in the OP and replies so far.  Thanks BRF48 for opening this discussion. I've been fortunate to have never experienced a vindictive, BSC woman who tried to exact revenge on me for some imagined wrong doing.  I hope I can continue to say that as long as I am sugaring.  Prevention is way better than cure for this problem.  I guess I trust my spidey senses to warn me in advance if there's trouble lurking under the surface.  So far, so good.    

 
As for triggering a latent psych issue a girl may have, that's a real concern I suppose.  Sadly, a big percentage of the SBs I've met have been victims of sexual abuse.  Some are open to talking about it and discussing their healing process.  Some are not.  But the more we know about a girl's past, the better we can behave towards helping her move forward and reclaiming her sexuality, instead of becoming part of the problem and perpetuating the damage done.

 
One other red flag that always sends me running, is when a woman is desperately in need of money.  That desperation makes my skin crawl!  And it ensures she will behave badly.  I politely decline.

 
But otherwise, if a potential SB passes the mutual vetting process and all the flags are green, I'll gladly show her my ID and share other personal info, and enjoy some lovely fun BCD.  And always try to be kind and gentle about the inevitable endings.

-- Modified on 7/28/2025 10:31:54 AM

Would be interesting if we had the woman's POV on this.
LOL
1. Something like 'over controlling'
2. Fragile egos
and so on...

Thank you for the nice responses! I'm sure there will be more, but I am happy to see my brothers have given the benefit of their own experience on this deep yet important topic. With mental health issues becoming more common in our increasingly stressful world, the more tools we have in our kit to deal with it when we encounter it the better! Feel free to elaborate on your own experiences with this, gentlemen, and keep the pointers coming as they are valuable to us all.

1) Well, if she's really hot, I overlook her bat sh1t craziness, to the better of my judgement LOL....I am sure you know how it ends usually.

2) As soon as flakiness appears, e.g., cancelling at last minute, ghosting or rudeness happens, it's hasta la vista. To the better of my judgement, sometimes, she apologizes and asks for a 2nd chance, I let it slide (if she's hot LOL)...of course, this rinse and repeats as expected.

3) Besides money, it's hard to calm them down. That's what they are here for LOL. It's a bad strategy in the long term. You get blackmailed.

Gentleman, let’s face it. Any woman who is willing to fuck for money has to have had some sort of mental issue. Whether it was a childhood thing, mommy or daddy issues, or self conscious about doing this for some cash. I had one go off on me about Trump. How horrible I am because of my vote, but she still took my money.  There’s a new POT that I really want but her social media is far left and I don’t know if I can pull it off as a secret agent. I just think all of them have some level of crazy.

Last year I had one melt down in front of me and the end result was an involuntary commitment. Traumatized me for months. Now I have a different viewpoint, "quirky" behavior is no longer passed off easily. My screening is so much tighter.

You need to make her do you while you have your MAGA hat on LOL

Was the involuntary commitment for you or for her? I feel for you here, my friend. I was pretty shook up for a few days after one of mine went haywire but I realized it was her issues and not me and I got over it pretty quick after blocking her.  Still, it can be a very scary, traumatic experience. The key is to not take it personally but it's hard to remember as they will couch their vitriol in VERY personal terms.

One Chicago SB told me another Daddy made her look out the window facing the Trump Tower while he did her from behind, as her punishment for being a bad little progressive. I took my cue from that and made her wear exactly what I described, down to the colors and patterns. She was obedient all night long and through the morning. She prided herself on video for me, explaining why she does exactly what Daddy wants.

It is unfortunately a long story, too much for this forum that spanned over multiple days. But the commitment was executed by a family member of hers and the police took her from my house.

The good news is that they came and got her and hopefully got her some help. It sounds like a very traumatic experience. Hopefully you can out it behind you and enjoy all the benefits this lifestyle still has to offer.