I feel has killed the vibe for me. I been thinking a lot on the parts of the hobby I enjoy and the parts I don't and I can't remember a single time I enjoyed it feeling too professional, strict and like a upscale service, I always hated that feeling in general when it comes to life, if I had to choose between a run down dive bar I can randomly walk into at 3am where the bartender had a real conversation with me and acted like a "normal person" or a fancy upscale place I gotta make reservations for where everyone has a suit and tie and acts like a snob I'd pick the dive bar purely for the vibes. Been having this feeling with providers. Recently met girls working off the streets right outside a club, cool ladies, asked me for blow, hopped in the car, said she'd give a bbj for 80 and had some fun, great vibes! Tried a few girls off the "low end sites" to catch that same vibe and I did, no reservations, no screening, just hit her up at 1am and go to her house, not a hotel but her actual house and stay over a few days no extra cost, only charged for sex nothing else, did some of her house chores for her, real awesome vibes! Another girl said I smelled nice and that was rare for her clients so she let me do it raw and creampie and watched TV with me no extra cost. Than I go back to the upscale ladies and it feels not so fun, schedule a appointment just to not be in a good enough mood (dealing with depression sometimes kills the mood) on the day of the appointment when I rather just text when I'm in the mood and pull up in 15 minutes, not 3 days later. And the upscale vibes just aren't my cup of tea, rather she show up with messy bed hair in her PJs, hit the bong, eat pizza together. Is this just me? I feel like it comes from me having a mindset where P4P is the same as the real thing minus the BS so it should feel just like the real thing....minus the BS mixed with me finding luxury and upscale things to be meaningless and not the source of happines, I believe the simple things are all that's needed in life to be happy.

which provides more authentic connection - closer to having a real gf but not quite with the same baggage .. It's a game of patience, and there is a way to play it right without getting burned out by flakes and scammers.  Hit me up privately if you want, or you can head over to The Erotic Highway. That's the board dedicated for sugar life style.  

 
As far as I am concerned, I find there is a way to be upscale and more professional without losing that human touch and coming across as too clinical.  Yes, getting a slice of new york style pizza from the neighborhood pizza joint can be fun, but so can be eating at Golden Steer in Las Vegas, where you have to book months in advance.  One doesn't have to choose between the two; one can do both. Life doesn't have to be binary.   One just has to find a sweet spot that fits our lifestyle and vibes with us.  

 
And lastly, if you ever feel like your time and money is not valued, always be willing to walk away. Sometimes people only value things when they don't have it. I have walked out of many SB relationships when I felt that I was being taken for granted.

Need to find the right fit. I have two girls I see on the regular. Sometimes we Netflix and chill over take out or we go do an event. I’m pretty picky but they are out there. In the end they have bills to pay 😉  Never get too attached because there’s always another one .

You got a wealth of advice from both players and providers in response to your last tale of woe. It would appear you have not tried to change anything. Yet, here you are complaining again. What is it you're hoping to achieve?

and for the most part, they were fun and even spiritually fulfilling, in a certain way.

 
But often they are not without complications, or "strings" as we commonly refer to them.

 
These often made for unpleasantness, to put it politely.

 
And so, the professional "no strings" method will always be the most common form of P4P, despite the limitations it places on interactions.

 
But if anyone ever wants to walk on the wild side, that will always be there.   In a way, it makes this life interesting.

 
Here's a song that neatly sums of the divide:

I think you're over analyzing your experiences & expectations.  

I am professional and still can be fun! I watched the Chicago Bears play at a dive bar on my Chitown FMTY because that's what my date wanted to do eat bar food and drink beer. I rode bikes on the beach in Hermosa on vacation with my friend. I smoked pot & did edibles in a 2 star hotel and had pizza delivered because that's what my millionaire date desires. You provide the blueprint providers who are professional execute. You bring your own vibes and energy.

It's not a luxury job your mindset matters.

That run on block is hard on the eyes.

I'm not really complaining this time I feel like I kinda found what I wanted in these encounters and feel better about it, might try SD too. Just ranting.

If what you want is a street worker who will ask you for blow and offer you an $80 BBJ, or one who will spontaneously do BBFSCIP because you smell nice, then yes, it sounds like the high-end professional experience isn’t for you.

As long as you don’t have a wife to bring STIs home to, and don’t mind exposing other providers to added risk, do you.

I do hope that clients who read posts like this will understand why we are taking on extra risk by offering BBBJ - and why they, correspondingly, are taking on extra risk for themselves and their wives by engaging in it.

I was following along and more understanding up until the uncovered full service (in exchange for being clean or smelling nice at that)! My personal feelings about some of the specific details aside, there are ways to seek out more of a casual vibe if that's what's important to you.

 
A majority of companions, especially those who charge midrange or high-end rates, do require deposits, discourage last minute dates, etc. Still, all sex workers do not have the same exact policies and price points. Even with deposits, as an example, there are still a good amount of companions who do not require deposits for some or all dates. There are reviewed or reputable companions who charge under $400 or even under $300 depending on where they are based. On Tryst, I see companions who welcome same day dates or at least mention that it's worth it to reach out and they'll oblige if they can.  

 
All that said, a sex worker being chill and casual doesn't inherently mean they have low / no standards or are desperate or lonely. Circling back to some of the points you made, that's something to reflect on further. There are providers who charge 250 for an hour because that's the business model they prefer. Meanwhile, those same providers who charge $250 are living full and rewarding lives, pursuing higher education, spending time with loved ones, or traveling the world during their off time. Therefore they'd have no desire to let a client overstay for exorbitant amounts of time.

 
You could switch up where you look for providers (STG vs Tryst) or try sugaring as has been mentioned. But that still might not address the possible underlying issues at play. The patterns described in the original post are not so much about upscale quote-unquote pretentious providers compared to providers who are more accommodating. Those behaviors are most likely exhibited by survival sex workers who do not have solid boundaries. Not wanting things to feel uptight or transactional is one thing. But wanting to stay over a sex worker's house for a few extra uncompensated days is an extreme overcorrection.

I mean I never get pushy with girls or ask for free handouts and I understand boundries but if a girl offers something extra like raw sex at no extra charge or treats me really nice and lets me stay over at her place, sleeping next to her at that! that is up to her, it's her choice and I'm not gonna turn her down, name a man who would? So yes your right about the boundry thing, I crave something more "real" and a lot of boundries makes it feel less real compared to providers who have little to none or might just like my vibe as a person or maybe they see I have money to spend and want more of a sugar daddy thing. Either way it does ruin the compatition cause from a clients POV why pay a ton for a similiar experience with a high end provider that has a lot of boundries and a busy schedule vs a girl treating me like a king and dropping all boundries for the minimum rate, good hygene and basic human kindness like bringing her a meal and doing her chores. At those rates I can just drown myself in quantity.

Recently single, in my 20s, drink, smoke and abuse substances daily, never go to doctors and accept mystery substances from the local homeless, STIs are the least of my worries, trying to feel alive is all I'm seeking.

Oh Boy !!  Did Hunter S. Thompson come back to life?  Did he resurrect himself. I hope you can at least write like him.

Guys like this seem to be de jour on this board. They show up guns a blazing, fantastical stories, outrageous statements, and argue with anyone who tries to explain hobby reality to them. Yet they post no reviews and contribute nothing of substance to the community. Until this gent showed up we had R2R and his bbfs fantasies and medical advice. Before that we had the disabled gent know-it-all who posted weird fiction and argued with anyone who tried to help him before quitting TER because he thought we were being mean to him. I've been here for +/-17 years, and it seems like 3 or 4 appear every year. I guess that's part of TER's ambiance?

But if you're here seeking some sort of validation for taking "mystery substances" offered to you by homeless persons, having BBFS with providers, and doing various drugs every day, that may be a heavy lift. At least for me.

And the bad-luck Schleprock/Eeyore routine is already wearing thin. If this is the life you choose to lead, why do you still sound so unhappy and whiny? And if it's the life that's making you unhappy and whiny, why not change it?

There are characters here, such as Ready2Rock, who heavily promote BBFS, much to the dislike of others. But, it's his body.  You are adding on what appears to be heavy and unfiltered drug use, and sex with as many women who will collaborate in all that. And in your mind, that's what makes it "genuine".  Can't tell you what to do, but can't agree either.  

I'd say "stay safe", but that idea seems moot.  I'm done with your posts.

Yes, totally agreed.... I have been on this site for 23 yrs now myself. I started in this "world" when I was 20 and now I am 45.  I do take breaks from this site often just to maintain sanity. There are always one or two of these kind of trolls hanging around.