Guys, have you ever turned down OTC time with a lady? What are some of the reasons you have/would? Ladies, have you ever offered to stay longer free of charge only to have your offer declined? What reasons were you given, and how did it make you feel?

On what's happening during that OTC time. I have incredible rapport with my ATFs and we regularly go out to dinner, shows, clubs, galleries, etc. - anything we have a mutual interest in. However, if there's anything sexual that's going to happen, I insist on the clock and the envelope. If I spend OTC time with a provider it's because they're friends and they have a special place in my life and vice-versa. However, it *is* how they make their living, so I have no problem parting with cash (which I have plenty of) to enjoy their favors. Now, on a special occasions like a birthday I have no problem accepting the gratis overnight from an ATF but it's understood between us that it's not to be part of our standard operating agreement.

Having said that, I can recall turning down overnights when I had to be "on" for big meetings/presentations the next day, and I knew that if I let the lady in question stay that she would try to fuck me to death, all night, as many times as possible because she's a succubus, and that no amount of Starbucks would keep me from being an exhausted wreck the next day.

I was really connecting with a provider and we were hanging out after a date talking.  She asked me if I wanted to go grab dinner and I had to pass on the offer.  I felt bad and I really wanted to go with her, but I already had plans that I couldn't get out of.  Any other day and it wouldn't have been a problem.

OTC is always a chemistry factor for both individuals IMHO.  I did decline the invite to catch a bite to eat with a lady after our session because where the "boom boom" was OK I simply found her to have a kinda annoying personality.  I mean withing 10 minutes of meeting her I had learned what a stupid jerk her X was and how she was doing this to spite him and far more info I was comfortable hearing.  She was certainly intersted in yaking the evening away.and I do enjoy engaging a lady conversation but she was was driving me crazy...lol.

I forget what my excuse was but it was polite .

Another lady , who I had seen often and really liked was going to meet up with some friends and see a movie after our session.  She invited me to come along.I declined as even though this lady and I had gone out for a meal or drinks OTC this was just something I was not comfortable with.

know what I mean?

Would be:
1) I really needed to be somewhere else, and couldn't get out of it.
2) The OTC time was to go somewhere I really really didn't want to be.
3) I couldn't stand being with the lady Probably the least likely reason since most likely I wouldn't have seen her in the first place if that was the case.

The woman was fantastic, but it came down to a scheduling thing.

It would have been nice, though.

I was over twenty years ago.

I had been seeing a provider for about a year, and we had gotten fairly friendly.  It was December 31st, and I saw her during the day, and she asked what plans I had for the evening.  I said I really had none as my wife and I spent New Years Eve just watching TV and little more than that.

She offered to have me come with her to a party, but I declined not knowing how I could explain my absence to the wife, but I thanked her very much and always remembered that very generous offer.  

I still know her to this day despite the fact she retired many years ago.

As noted by others, the answer to this question will obviously be very much related to the who's asking!  As I recall some of my early encounters with Venus, after we were done playing (which was invaribly spectacular, BTW), we just ended up hanging out, don't remember ever there being any direct invitation to do so!  We did this on a number of occasions, which led to us becoming friends and there were at least 4 or 5 occasions where we just got together to have lunch or dinner and hang out.  This friendship, in turn, lead to her introducing me to a colleague of her, who is now my wife!  Accordingly, I suggest going for it!

And that was because I had to go to work...

we guys always welcome OTC..it is rare and appreciated..when i have the next day off and can spend some OTC..it is never offered..when i have to be up early the next day for work..it is offered..damned if i do..damned if i dont..

I have a regular I see at least every other week. I book hour appointments but they always run over. It's always by her choice. We do the business the first hour and the rest of the time we just hang out and talk. I guess we just click. Well she asked me out to dinner after one appointment and I had to refuse because the city she provides in is the city I live in and I just could not risk running into someone I know.

It depends. Why? If it is lunch time quickie, I need to get back to work. Other than that, I am game.

I'm not specifically discussing the poster's particular position, but I see this type of comment a lot and while I agree it is how she makes her living, it can also simply be marketing.  Other 'businesses' routinely give away merchandise to create customer loyalty or to express gratitude to good customers, why would this business be any different. Using the same logic, would this mean that one should never accept a discount either? Taking it further, if all we are paying for is her time then any time taken should be paid for.

She's the business owner and if she decides to run a special and the special includes her taking me out to dinner, or her sleeping with me OTC, why not just appreciate the gesture.  She's also a human being with feelings and if she offers a gift that is valuable to her and to you, and you insist on paying for it, you probably don't deserve it anyway.  If you've reached that point in your relationship, she knows you'll be back with a fist full of cash the next time, so just let her thank you for your business.

Now to step off my soapbox and answer the question...I've never turned down OTC, but I only hobby on the road and I usually travel by myself, so there is no family/SO/business/etc. interruptions to worry about.

My position...Enjoy the gifts that life gives you and if you are so blessed to have a woman want to spend time with you for no other reason than she wants to spend time with you (or for the aforementioned marketing thing) than enjoy that too.  

Your point is well taken.

However, in my specific case (and ONLY in my specific case) the reasons I like to provide at least something in the way of compensation are twofold:

1.) I enjoy my relationships with my ATFs and like them just the way they are. The last thing I want to have happen is for them to be spoiled by some hidden resentment creeping in because they feel I've somehow taken advantage of that relationship and

2.) It help *me* to keep things in perspective.

I receive plenty of bennies from long term lady friends already in the way of frequent flyer discounts, etc. and am just uncomfortable with the concept if it were to happen outside of the context of a special occasion. It works for me, and for them.  

Posted By: MT91151

I'm not specifically discussing the poster's particular position, but I see this type of comment a lot and while I agree it is how she makes her living, it can also simply be marketing.  Other 'businesses' routinely give away merchandise to create customer loyalty or to express gratitude to good customers, why would this business be any different. Using the same logic, would this mean that one should never accept a discount either? Taking it further, if all we are paying for is her time then any time taken should be paid for.

She's the business owner and if she decides to run a special and the special includes her taking me out to dinner, or her sleeping with me OTC, why not just appreciate the gesture.  She's also a human being with feelings and if she offers a gift that is valuable to her and to you, and you insist on paying for it, you probably don't deserve it anyway.  If you've reached that point in your relationship, she knows you'll be back with a fist full of cash the next time, so just let her thank you for your business.

Now to step off my soapbox and answer the question...I've never turned down OTC, but I only hobby on the road and I usually travel by myself, so there is no family/SO/business/etc. interruptions to worry about.

My position...Enjoy the gifts that life gives you and if you are so blessed to have a woman want to spend time with you for no other reason than she wants to spend time with you (or for the aforementioned marketing thing) than enjoy that too.  

Posted By: usrbinperl

However, if there's anything sexual that's going to happen, I insist on the clock and the envelope. If I spend OTC time with a provider it's because they're friends and they have a special place in my life and vice-versa. However, it *is* how they make their living, so I have no problem parting with cash (which I have plenty of) to enjoy their favors.  

One nice lady was always offering her apartment to me when I visited NYC on the weekends. She normally didn't see anyone on the weekends, and liked hanging out with me. I was a bit shy back then and never took her up on it.

Another lady likes me to be her last of the day, so the 'official' 2 hour date becomes much longer, but sometimes I need to be elsewhere, so I decline.

Many other times where they wanted me to stay for another hour or so, so we could explore more areas of sensuality. When time permitted, I did stay. I couldn't always.