Most reviews are so formulaic they lack all erotisicm.  However....  I just read two that were well written involving FMF and will be included in my masturbation fantasies.  

Thank You marmelanne, please keep posting your threesome reviews.  I will also be looking to see if any of these ladies travel to my area.  Very nice.

I save my masturbation for the discussion board! Ohp! hahahahaha

Reviews like you are describing are completely and utterly worthless to a guy seeking the "real experience".  Why not just go online and read porn..written for that purpose?

Yea...just what this joint needs is more completely asinine narcissism!

Yes for you as a guy looking for a one on one, these are worthless.  But for women looking to do a FMF or FF, these are an absolute gold mine.  For me the regular reviews are of no value.

This was the first time a review was written well enough to excite me.  Which simply made me wonder about everyone else.  

Ok maybe that's a stretch but yes I do masturbate to reviews, mostly to reviews of women I have seen because I kind of relive my experience with them.

But I'm a sex addict. Oh we'll, there's worse things.

Bunch of fucktards on the boards today for sure.

No one wants to read what I write including (Me) Myself (and I)...

Once I and the Lady part ways, I don't think to much more about the experience. I also lose focus when trying to remember everything that happens during the session. Im not there to make a documentary.


Now back to Fagot Fridays on the GD/masturebation board.

And those reviews that you read..you honestly believe any of the drivel written about the details?

Assuming you do...and from your posts here..you do..then bully for you.

Most players who have read a review like that know it is total fabrication.

And like I said...I'm sure you can find more than enough really well written porn online to last a lifetime.

The reviewers who write these Penthouse Forum reviews are nothing short of self-centered narcissists.  And a reader would be well advised to simply disregard the review for any real integrity.  All anyone really needs to know is the basics...like are the pics real...on time...not a BSC hooker and so on.  To go into details about what johnnie boy wants to expound on...makes for fun reading for newbs like you  LOL

No..seriously...Lot of bullcrap in those reviews... I would not call it goldmine, but I would not call it totally worthless either as long as the girl has scores ranging from 6-10. I am looking for diverse scores...A couple of 6s and 7s...Mostly 8s and 9s..And a handful of 10s spread out.  It is impossible for a girl to get all 10s without fabrication, IMHO.

Also, when I read the reviews, I am trying to get general idea about the ladies, and don't treat every word as gospel.

You will learn more as you play more...

That they get all hot and bothered WHILE they are writing a review for me...mentally reliving the experience, lol.

Since when did the truth or integrity of a fantasy (porn, review or otherwise) have anything to do with what turns someone on? And, and far as "enough really well written porn online to last a lifetime?....you can't be serious? Since when is porn "well written"?....lol

Good for SBW's if she found enjoyment in a review.

Jeesh....aren't you a buzzkill.

Is this for real? I waited so long to get my VIP (read: two weeks) just so I could read the same thing over and over again. Certain kinds of ladies have a certain type of review they get and it repeats.
I write erotic, and I can't get off to a drivel of DTTYSNS SVDTY acronyms.

Every story always has the "I came so hard everyone almost died" type of statements. I just....I just don't get reviews. If backchanneling is what is real, then why not do that?

So ridiculous.

If you had actually read my replies you would have seen (if you got your head out of your ass) that I was commenting on the absurdity of the reviews as masturbation material.  The drivel that's posted already is stupid enough now...but to encourage the johnnie boys (or in YOUR case the janie girls...how about a fucking review HP?) to write even more melodramatic shit is just bullshit.

And the OP characterized the reviews as being "well written"....so we have a short story author out here in review land.  And if the OP wants to read porn...plenty of it on the net.  I'm sure you would know better than I where to find the girlie type porn.  Or maybe she should just stick with those Harlequin Romance novels....but keep that shit out of the "boy's reviews"....it's so fucking pathetic.

To your point: Personally, reading [most] reviews is about as entertaining, to ME, as reading the wall street journal. Or poking myself in the eye with a stick. But the OP said:  I just read two that were well written involving FMF and will be included in my masturbation fantasies"

There's nothing ridiculous about that. The details of a review do not have to be "real" in order for someone to find it arousing.




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Provider profiles sometimes indicate they are Bi when they are really not.  So this is not a good measure and only leaves me with the reviews as an indicator of whether or not my needs will be met. I prefer the reviews written by female hobbyists but those are not plentiful, so....  I am left to read and trust in the reviews that are posted by men who have had threesomes.  

Think of it this way - if I end up with a provider who is not really Bi then all I am getting is my clit rubbed for an hour.  The equivalent of you paying $400 for a provider to give you a hand job.  Probably not the experience you are looking for.  

And on a final note.  Your posts on this topic are incredibly rude and I do not appreciate it.  I could have responded in kind but did not.  Please do me the favor of not responding to my posts if this is how you are going to conduct yourself.

I'd tell you to ignore them. But, they make that virtually impossible.

Spot on response here though.

I do read some reviews of a hot provider to my husband. It makes for an interesting evening.

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