I don't feel any guilt whatsoever on the days that I basically let the provider do "all the work".

It's not a relationship, I am paying to be made happy. Sometimes that means wild monkey sex. Somedays I can be perfectly content with a massage and a blow job.

I guess a lot of guys feel a need to perform everytime they see a woman, whether P4P or civvie. I think many of those guys haobby rather infrequently and feel a need to get the most out of every session. I hobby almost as many days as I don't, so I don't feel the need to be "on my game" every time.

As for your question, "if we were getting paid for our time?" then of course I would put out a 100% effort every time, but I am the one doing the paying, I doubt many providers care as long as I am "clean, respectful, etc"

both people are in rhythm.  it's frustrating when a provider is on top and i feel like it's a pilates session to poke her from underneath.  or the opposite -- they ride it so hard, the receptacle on the plastic gets stretched over my helmet.  WTF, let's dance, baby.  looks aren't enough if it feels like a wrestling match or a trip to the gym, with the provider as the equipment.  but I've had some really great sex with my civie women, or i wouldn't have stuck around.  hence, a high standard for GFE.  PSE is way too phony when you've had the real thing.

I can understand that some guys might just want the "strip and service" routine - sorta reminds me of a blowjob on 9th Avenue. I don't really want to feel like the Budweiser truck going in for an oil change. I'm of the belief that the lady - ANY lady, paid or not - would like to think she's engaging a living human being, not a mannequin with a hard plastic penis. I am also of the belief that ANY lady in this lifestyle would like to feel like a LADY, not a vacuum cleaner or a pocket-pussy. Every man/woman combination is different - I don't pre-plan any position or action (although there is a fetish in my programming!) - I just let things develop as they may, and engage accordingly. Languid lounge experience - GOOD! Energetic romp - GOOD! Getting milked like a cow - NOPE! (I've worked with those milikng machines!!!)Your "dead fish" reference reminds me of this bar in Whitehall NY (eewww!). And, in my world, NO ONE would use aliases, and we could all go down to Washington and get stoned with Barack. But I don't have a world, sooo...

When I first entered the hobby I might have "dead fish" it but not for those reasons. More so because I was intimidated and awe struck by the P4P.

But I do fall into the category that Gambler spoke about. I go all out to please. For me to get (aside from the obvious) pleasure is knowing that I am pleasing the one I am with. Whether it is P4P or civie if I don't think my partner is getting as much out of this as me neither I'm I.

Sure if I had unlimited funds and was doing this nearly daily, I could be more of a dead fish and just take my pleasure, but I really do like to think of this as mutual. I do of course realize that YMMV and on my end I did get to pick the partner so I know that is not always the case on her end.

I can't do the dead fish, cause that would mean CG or RCG which I hate; any passive position is thumbs down for me. I fuck, I don't get fucked. Fuck that. Fuckin' A.



Fuck.

Guilty

Hey, I'm old, tired and out of shape.  Some days are better than others, but I always try to engage with a provider as a person, and I like to think they know that.  While I try to be more energetic when first meeting a lady, I could be the energizer bunny and I would not be a lady's sexual fantasy.  I mean I think I'm ok, and I'm comfortable with myself - and I like to please my partner, civvie or hobby.  But I show up, I take a shower even if I don't need one, I'm polite and I pay.  I think providers are not too unhappy with me.  I am amused by how many guys on these boards think they are God's gift to women.  Some of them may be, and some providers may care more about the quality of the sex then the money, but all of them, all the time?

who encourages me to just lie there while she goes down on me.  She goes into a bit of a trance, and any activity on my part seems to upset her tempo.  She will go on like this for about a half hour until she can't stand it any longer and then goes on top of me CG till she is satisfied.

I've actually come to enjoy the whole process and appreciate the integrity of her sexuality.

Of course for the rest of the session I then get to be active.

Give and take is what it's all about; that and experimenting.

So, this is something I can request?

I agree with several of the other posters. It's a give and take. Sometimes I'm more active than others. Sometimes I initiate sometimes she does or I encourage her to.  Couldn't do the dead fish it's just too good to be still. I have to touch, rub, caress, kiss, ...well you get the idea. We both fuck and get fucked.

I'd prefer mutual enjoyment. Sometimes i want to be ontop and then have her on top of me.  69 and mutual masturbation also feels nice.  I wouldn't also want a lady to just 'lay there'.

I really enjoy being a contributing participant.

I like giving pleasure.  I think most guys do.  We are sometimes clueless about how to do it, but I think most of us love the ego-rush of making a woman cum, whether off the clock or when paying.

That said, when I'm paying a service provider, I expect the focus to be on me.  And I'm not shy about reminding girls who the customer is.  Why should I be?  About ten cents of my money is dropping into her purse EVERY SECOND that we are together.  Plink plink plink...  The steady plink of coins.  That is how the ticking of the clock sounds to me.

Nobody goes to a masseuse and says halfway through 'Hmm, your shoulders must be sore, let me do you for a while now'.  Nobody goes to a bar and says to the bartender 'Wow it's 1AM, you must be bushed, let me mix the next round for you'.  Nobody hires a lawn service and pushes the mower a while when it's a hot day.  Who carries his own bags and tips the bellboy anyway?  Who parks his own car and then slides the valet a tenner on his way past the key stand?  That would all be absurd.  It's equally absurd for a prostitute to think the guy owes her pleasure.  If she wants a real date, she should get one.  But when she's working, she's working.  

So, I guess back to your original question, Estella:  I have never been a 'dead fish'.  That's just not my style.  Laying there like a dead guy seems sort of weird to me.  I'd call it a sort of fetish, actually.  If you get a customer like that, my advice would be to still look like you're having a great time.  Ride his lame-ass corpse and fake as many orgasms as you can get away with.  A good prostitute satisfies the ego at least as much as she satisfies the body.