TER General Board
While it might have been
a reasonable question for him to THINK about, it was not appropriate to ASK.
He was an idiot.
I had someone write to me "Are you worth the $$$??"
My response back..."you are not worth a response"...
His loss...Shaye
and if he is reading these boards - Yes she is worth it!!
Ken
worth only $$$. I think you are priceless.
He is just plain stupid for asking such a question.
you just saved yourself some aggrivation.
Great response Shaye.
Clearly, this is a classless gentleman who deserves what he got that night...a date with his hand, with his all-too-familiar Jackson Browne song on yet again...
"Looks like it's me and you again tonight...Rosie"
the question is entirely reasonable. In fact, this question is one of the primary reasons why TER exists. Generally, members read reviews to determine if a provider "is worth" the money that it costs for the service. To a large extent, members want to know what they are likely to get for the fee (i.e., value). By reading the reviews posted on TER, and other posts such as the Mathesar report on the LA board, members can make informed choices and lessen the chances of getting poor service and increase the chances of getting value. Being offended and angered by the question seems rather silly.
can I respond to a client who wants to see me, are you worth seeing.. IT is rude. I would be so out of line. (NOT that I would do that, never ever!)
You can research a provider. There are plenty of review boards. On this one alone I have 7 pages of reviews.
I think what he was implying is that because I look different than most...ie tattoos and piercings.
I was offended and I was not being silly.
Shaye
His question could NOT be reasonably answered by you, only himself... and it is just these types of boards that he should look for his answers on, based on the criteria he has chosen.
Are you worth the $$$?!?
That IS amazingly rude... we are all priceless!
His question should have been stated in regards to the value of your TIME. Why would ANYONE respond with,
"well, no actually...
my time is not worth what I am asking for it."
It was nice of you to bother responding to him at all, even if abrupt - I do not feel that you were out of line in the least.
: )
Next e-mail, please!
If a provider asked me if I was worth seeing, I would not consider the question rude. I would respond by telling her that I am absolutely worth seeing in that I shower just prior to the appointment, I am well groomed, well dressed, in shape, I will treat her with respect, I will behave myself, and I will provide the full fee promptly upon arrival.
To juxtapose the question and provide an analogy, if I'm an attorney who charges $300 per hour, and a potential client asks me if I'm worth that fee, if I believe I am, my response is, "Absolutely." I then tell the potential client about my years of experience and the type of service I can provide which justifies the fee. I'm not offended by the question because, from my point of view, it's a reasonable one. The client wants to know if he/she is going to get value for the fee and for most people, $300 per hour is a lot of money.
Not only is it a rude question to ask of a provider, but it's stupid, too. What did the guy think Shaye would say in response? "No, I'm not worth the money, pay me whatever you feel like?!?!?!" And how difficult would it be for him to stop being so lazy and do a little research. Good grief! She has 7 pages of reviews here. Is he absolutley clueless about what type of woman appeals to him???
As far as your analogy of an attorney goes, I'm sorry but there is no analogy. Why? Because there is absolutely no other occupation like that of an escort. It requires a level of intimacy not found in any other job. Attorneys physiques are not held to the same level of scrutiny as that of an escort. Attorneys aren't requested to get naked on the job and required to be pleasant about it. Attorneys are not asked to perform a myriad of consensual fantasies in a hotel bedroom. Attorneys are not at risk for imprisonment or physical harm from strangers every time that they go to work. The list of differences go on and on and on. I can never understand why some people insist upon comparing escorting to other jobs. It's just not the same. Really, it just isn't.
a reasonable question for him to THINK about, it was not appropriate to ASK.
He was an idiot.
I think you all are over-reacting. Sure it was a rather rude thing to say. Over the years I have had providers state on their own "I'm worth it" (refering to their fee) Without any question being asked. Unless there were other things he said, what makes you think it had anything to do with your tatoos or peircings? Some people like them some don't. If he contacted you from a web-site I assume he saw the tat's, ect. If they were a big deal to him I doubt he would have contacted you. Kind of sounds like you are being overly sensitive and seeing insult where none was intended.
IMO it was a legitimate thought, expressed in a poor way. If it rubbed you the wrong way, don't see him, but lighten up a little and try not to take things as personal attacks or insults
Once, when I was interviewing for a job, the interviewer wanted to talk salary. He said "What kind of money are you looking for?"
I replied "I'm looking for a million dollars!"
Ha, Ha, Ha. "Well, we can't pay that much, how about $xxxxxx?"
After a short negotiation we reached an agreeable figure and the interviewer said "Are your worth that amount?"
To which I replied, "I'm worth the million dollars!"
So, Shaye, here's another response to add to your list.
First, the question is stupid as well as rude. Are you worth it? Well isn't he asking are you worth the fee that you decided to ask for because you thought you were worth that fee?
Of course you think you're worth it or you would have come up with some other fee. Duh.
Now for the answer I was thinking I would see as I read it:
"You'll never know"
yes it was rude and disrespectful
Unless the email is over the top rude or threatening, it might deserve a reponse. People do not have the best communication skills, and are rude sometimes without being aware of it. Manners are for the most part dissapearing at the rate of the rainforest. It is not your reponsibility to educate s/he, that is achieved through the tools available: TER, review, and your webpage. The guiding light of a therapist corrects their myopic vision and sheds light on their idiocy which was formed from their upbringing, environment, or genes.
I agree with the other post, this is your business. The question of worth is answered by the affirmation of your services. Yes, I am good at what I do, and I believe in my work. My market affirms my value. Direct people to your reviews, they can PM the reviewer to get another vantage point. I concur, it is a pain, but it is a lot of money, and maybe they are new. Sometimes people say stupid things just to make conversation.
Much respect, Michelle
P.S. When I make it to your neck of the woods let's go for martinis and compare tatts and piercings. Hang in there.
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