I tired this with the first provider I saw after my wife passed.  I had the whole night choreographed:  The dinner; champagne and strawberries; the bath.  After the bath, I carried the lady into the bedroom, which was illuminated by scented candles, with soft music off on the background.  I kissed her as she was still in my arms, then I gently placed her on the bed, which I had earlier sprinkled with red rose pedals.

First of all, they feel like dying clams; cold, and spongy.  Second -- and no one tells you this in the movies -- they stain.  The next morning, my bed looked like the climax of a Wes Craven horror flick, and she and I looked like little, baby leopards.

Sure, I got points for romance, but while I certainly expected to get f**ked, I didn't think my new 400 count sheets would get f**ked, too. (See, Sedona?  That "too" was for you.)

Sounds like rose petals are over-rated.  But the same can be said for whipped cream...just think how sour milk smells & you get the picture.

It is true that any real flower with significsnt color will stain, expecially when mixed with sweat or other bodily fluids.

So here is a piece of advice for the next time. Your local crafts store..such as Micheals, carries a line of silk rose petals for various uses. They are soft and have the exact look and feel of a real petal without the mess and mayhem that comes after a steamy encounter. They usually are sold near the wedding items in clear round containers.

Dont give up on the romance aspect, it sounds like other than the horror movie vision the next morning, that it was a lovely encounter.

Good luck babe

xoxoxo
Lass

You're a gentleman and a scholar, and a wonderful writer, too. You're a delightful romantic, and I wouldn't be surprised if you were handsome as well..

Happy Fourth.

xo,
Sedona

*smile*

Once the festivities start up and we get heated up I pull the sheets up about halfway and it really gets the scent of the rose concentrated so it permeates your skin and blankets etc.

As far as the petals getting cold haven't really ran into that (although when I have a nekkid woman next to me I don't get too distracted from what I want to do) so maybe an electric blanket on a low setting under the bottom sheet would be helpful??

Who knows, I just like them on the bed and all over me, along with some champagne, caviar, and some Belgian Dark Chocolate Truffles for dessert!

HPG

Loverofwomen,

While I enjoy reading almost all your posts (the rest of them are innocuous and none are offensive) everytime you seem to brag about how fine you treat women (roses, champaigne, strawberries and scented candles) I say to myself, is he for real or what?

Maybe it's an "older guy" thing, but then I'm in my mid-40s so I'm not a clueless spring chicken myself. I can understand treating one's SO like that (God knows I have myself), but do you seriously mean to say you treat escorts the same?

Why do guys feel they have to win their "hearts and minds" like this? Do they pamper you any (in non-sexual ways)? Or is it, like most things in this business, all one-sided?

Please don't take offense (or do, what do I care) but it's my "job" to ask politically incorrect questions like this... LOL

is that this business is about fantasy. Some gents like a nasty romp while others enjoy the romance aspect. To seduce and romance a woman is not always about the woman in particular but the feeling that you are able to show and feel and live a particular fantasy.

While I would never presume to speak for Loverofwomen, but I would venture to guess that his fantasys lie somewhere in the realm of feeling a romantic connection, to play a role, to do and feel those things....if only for a moment, he felt so long ago with that incredible women he lost. And while i am sure no one will ever replace her, sweet memories float back when you feel that physical, romantic connection....if only for a moment. LOW, forgive me if i have overstepped my bounds......

I have had many a gent romance and seduce me during my time in the biz. It was living a dream seen in a movie, or read in a book. No they were not trying to win my heart, what they were doing was acting out a scenario that became their FANTASY.

Because some choose to take the lets romp and you go away aproach does not mean, that the others who tend to look at their intimate encounters in a much more romantic sense are wrong or have any sort of issues. We all have our own wants, desires and demons. How we choose to bring them to fruition is all part of the game. The bragging LOW does on how well he treats a woman is a damn site better than some of the reviews I have read that describe how some guys bang their whores they see and wax poetically on how big their dicks are.

And one last thing...yes I did very much pamaper all of my gents. I gave tokens of my affection, spent extra time off the clock and made myself available to those who were specail and that I cared for. And honestly, There were those who did not take care of me finacially because of the extras I did, because I neither asked nor wanted it. Those who won over my heart and mind are those I look out for when they ask my advice on seeking a lady or booking a hotel or just general advice on the hobby in general. I am by no means an expert, but I give my.02 when it is asked for.

Lets not take the fantasy and beautiful time one man has spent and make it seem as though he has issues. It is far from the truth. The hobby is all about living the sensual dream....no matter what that may entail.

xox
Lass

...give me an empathetic lady ANY day.

At least you took the time to give a thoughtful response -not that it was one I didn't already know.

And afterall, this is YOUR business and you should know what men want.

I guess my only remaining comment would be that the ones who brag about what a fine "lady's man" they are are sometimes (not always) as bothersome as the ones who treat women like whores and are proud of it. Both can be exhibiting the manifestations of the same syndrome oddly enough -if you know what I mean.

This is not a reflection on LOW. I'm speaking generally...

P.I.

I've found that some men who over-pamper are using it as a means of control, and probably are part of the syndrome of which you speak (thinking escorts are whores in the worst sense of the word).

Recently I had a discussion about this with a client who was excessively pampering me and seemed to want to control my schedule as a result of all his gifts. During the discussion, he said, "Well, I don't want to treat you as the prostitute you are, so I am treating you like a lady".

How insulting! Needless to say, he's no longer my client.

You hit it right on the nail. Good for you.

It's as if by being over-generous and ultra-caring they're hiding the underlying fact of this relationship: that this is a woman who most likely would NOT have sex with them in real life. It's not sugar-coating. It's far more subtle (perhaps sinister) than that. They can not bring themselves to be comfortable with a "whore" (as they perceive her) so they over-compensate by treating her like a queen.

The flip side of that coin is men who feel they must treat providers like whores if and when they see the "human" side of them as real people with feelings and desires like them. It's the "sex-with-a-doll" mentality.

So now I shall be even more P.I. and state that both types of men are pathetic.

My 2 cents.

Also, are you saying that all gift givers are pathetic? Please excuse me cause i'm a little slow so please explain it so I can understand it.  Thank you.
Gonna enjoy the 4th now so I'll check later tonight or tomorrow. Everyone have a great 4th of july weekend and take care.

If you read this patriot, its been over 2 weeks now and I'm still free of it, thanks.


                             Jammers

about a client of mine..hmm.

Was talking with someone the other day about the type of men who are most likely to go see Doms and ask to be peed on, humiliated, forced to wear a diaper, etc. and I was asked to guess. My guess was correct - very high level executives. We discussed that perhaps having to carry out so many difficult
decisions, such as firing people, laying off dozens, etc eventually wears them down, making them feel like scumbags. The ol' "how do these people sleep at night" thing. They need sometimes to feel 'punished' and get that absolution. Makes sense..
Just as what you're saying makes sense..
We're a strange species, we are..

As to your other question, which of the prefixes "over-" and "ultra-" do you not understand? There is a difference between (normal) gift-giving and innundating a woman with them.

Incorrectly yours,
P.I.

Not only that ... but people in high stress, decision making jobs often find their release by becoming totally submissive. i.e. they have no decisions to make, everything they have to do is delegated by someone else.

Still wish someone would explain the turn on by having someone pee on you. I'm open to a lot of things, and don't judge ... just wanna know what's the turn on?

Jimbo

CelticLass did a good job of expressing my feelings.  And, no, Lass, you didn't overstep your bounds.  On the contrary, thank you for your insight and eloquence.

PI and Sexxygirrl, I was initially unaffected by your posts, as I just saw you as having viewpoints which I couldn't reconcile with mine.  But I draw the line at being called pathetic, and being accused of trying to exert control over anyone.

I recognize that these ladies put up with a lot of crap.  I realize that they must often deal with missed and cancelled appointments, men with poor hygiene, creeps, louts, pervs, and men of low class.

Why am I pathetic, and why must I have been trying to establish control, when I gave a lady flowers, offered her some champagne, and gave her a massage?  It's not like I was buying these girls new cars, or tipping them fifty per cent.  I simply enjoyed making my evening's friend feel comfortable, relaxed, and appreciated.  

I often treated my wife to a similar evening, when time permitted, and we weren't both exhausted.  Was I pathetic THEN?  Was I trying to control HER?  No.  I just wanted her to feel comfortable, relaxed, and appreciated.  Am I sick because I now do the same for my SO?  I think not.  Certainly, SHE doesn't feel controlled, and SHE doesn't see me as pathetic.


Frankly, I take exception to being characterized in the manner you two have chosen.  I think an apology's in order.

My post was directed to PI, who was making a comment about certain men who think escorts are whores (in the derogatory sense)even if they treat them like "ladies". PI said he was NOT referring to you, just making a general comment.

I agree with PI's observation. As I said in my post, I had a very unpleasant experience with a client who over-pampered me and smothered me with gifts...then tried to exert control...then insulted me by letting me know his revulsion of escorts as a whole.

I would certainly agree with PI that my client was pathetic.

But I was definitely not referring to you...you seem to be an ummm,  true, lover of women.

It started with me simply saying that your descriptions of your seemingly romantic conquests with providers REMINDED me of a certain type of man (the over-gifting kind who we then singled out and discussed aside). I believe I even went out of my way to state that this was NOT about you and that I was speaking more generally.

If you want an apology, you shall have it: I AM SORRY IF I OFFENDED YOU.

But don't blame sexxygirrl, she was only responding to a comment I made about a certain pathology in SOME men who feel they must treat their "whores" like "queens" in order to make themselves at ease for patronizing them.

I don't think there's a man or woman on this board that would call YOU, of all people, "pathetic" or an example of this kind of man.

Unlike some people, I do not equate being P.I. with simply trash-talking people for the hell of it!

Thanks but you still didn't explain, I told you I was slow didn't I.  You explained the real life thing very well also.  Guess now I can start doing bare back sessions cause I guess I'm not living a real life and nothing will happen to me.  Just trying to understand and thanks for your assistance.  Guess I wasn't the only one either.  
Hope everyone had a great 4th of july celebration or relaxation.


                               Buh Bye,

                               non-existing jammers

Warning this is a bit long winded...

Sexxy girl brings up a very valid point as I too have had this type of client and I tell ya when it came to a head and I realized what it was about him that always kind of bugged me I let him have it.

Ya see he would always bring me gifts and take me out to fabulous restaraunts. I love fine dining alot and really enjoy trying new things...in fact I am a chef of considerable skill and a oenephile (sp?) of voracious appetite. Now every time we would go to dinner he would discuss the menu and the wine choice as if he was Professor fucking Higgins and I was a greater challenge than Eliza herself.

Even though I had shared much personal information with him as to my education and experience in the culinary arts he just continued in this annoying manner until one night I got tired of him calling all the shots and ordered another bottle of wine that was a particular favorite of mine....also cost as much the rest of our dinner and hotel room. The sommelier praised me on my selection like I was a wine loving genius. My Date was obviously upset and said something to the effect of the wine not being worth the price, to which I countered yes I felt it was and that I intended on paying for it. He gave me that condescending "let the whore think she is sophisticated look" and said he never really cared for it himself but he would try a sip...so basically I finished the whole bottle and had already had two other glasses.

Fast forward to after dinner...
we are walking back to the hotel and pass by an art gallery with some nice paintings by that young romanian girl whose name I forget right now. Now this girl is a prodigy and is already very well known, she was first brought to my attention a while before and I was a big fan. Her painting were already selling to serious collectors and she was only about 13 years old...in fact her picture was right there for us to see and the gallery had a full page ad in the reader to publicize the showing. He proceeds to tell me that this painting is by an obscure european that was heavily influenced by Picasso and tells me a story about how he was his paint boy lacky for years blah blah blah...I let him go on and take the galleries brochure of her work and didn't say a word.
fast forward to the room,...
I am now feeling really buzzed and fired up for some adult style fun so I start talking dirty and getting into it with porn star style enthusiasm. Just as I am asking him if he wants to ****** (use your filthiest imagination) he grabs me by the arm and tells me to sit next to him and pats the sofa. He starts telling me that even though I am a prostitute I shouldn't think I have to behave with such a lack of self respect blah blah blah....

so to make this hugely long story a bit shorter, I yelled "time out" at him and must of done "crazy eyes" too cause he looked a little scared. I proceeded to tell him what I thought of him and his art history lesson as I got dressed and gave him the galleries brochure before I walked out the door. I then made a booty call to my ATF and gave him one on the house as he unlike Prof. Higgins and much like myself could fuck like a pornstar and respected the hell out of me for my enthusiasm.

I'm afraid I over reacted to both your post and Sexxygirrl's.  I sincerely apologize.  I was wrong.  

It would probably be a good idea for me to re-read posts I initially find offensive at least once.  Had I done so, I would've picked up each of your disclaimers that you saw me as an exception.

I'm normally pretty laid back.  I guess it was just a funny night.  I hope we can all three continue to enjoy each other's posts as if nothing happened.

Again, please accept MY apologies.

but the man you describe above seems to me the embodiment of the pathology P.I. describes. i personally find this topic faschinating (it's certainly underpresented in TER discussions - usually all you hear is the "white knight" syndrome). i was gonna put in my $0.02 into this thread but then i noticed it getting "skewed" (quite literally if you look at the thread on the main page!  and i noticed that P.I.'s point was being misunderstood, gradually being wrongly perceived as an insult

but i think Ginger has it nailed and in her honor i hereby introduce a motion to the board that we dub this sick-n-twisted psycho-sexual phenomenon the "Evil Professor Higgins" syndrome

does anyone 2nd that motion?

as in outside the provider-hobbyist "universe"  these women would not be having sex with these men.

by all means DO NOT stop using safe sex in this altered universe of ours!  

LOL

Another great post from you. You don't post all that much on the boards, but when you do..
And let me tell y'all - talking with her in person is the most entertaining of occasions. It's fasten your seatbelts, you're in for a ride!
I can only imagine what it must be like in the bedroom for the Hobbyists..! LOL

Rose petals are indeed great, but of course, they stain and dry up.  What I would suggest is using ARTIFICIAL silk rose petals!!  They SMELL great, don't stain AND can be re-used!  

You can find them in move romantic novelty stores or through independent distributors (present company included).  They sell for about $15-20 and are great as long as you keep them in a little plastic bad to preserve the scent.

Good luck.

Tammie

we establish the "Evil Professor Higgins Syndrome" (in honor of Ginger Girl) to stand for and describe:

Any hobbyist who is so repelled/uncomfortable/guilty for patronizing a Provider who he feels carries the stigma of being a {whore,prostitute,jezebel,meretrix,trollop,tart ...etc} that he overcompensates for her perceived inadequacies and the social taboo of seeing her, by showering her with gifts/money/treats and treating her as if she was the very polar opposite, like a {queen,lady,princess,empress,persona grata, ... etc}


did i leave anything out? comments, criticism, refinements? after all, semantics are important. think of all the time and Kbytes saved in the future by simply saying so-n-so suffers from EPH or WK (white knight) syndrome!