So, actually, yes, sellers DO dictate terms to buyers. All the time. "No shirt, no shoes, no service"- ring a bell?
The fact that you put it in terms as you did ("even when")... well, nice of you to feel morally superior to your prostitute by virtue of not being one, and it obviously makes you think you're a manly man, but this is like feeling morally superior to your butcher while chowing down on your steak.
Good for you, though- you'll show those hookers who's boss! Go have a cookie, big man!
Girl's rate is $$$$$. I see her. Have fun. Then she raises her rate to $$$$$$$. That's too much for me. Her site says no negotiating. She gets in touch, tells me we had a nice time an asks why don't I see her. I say cuz you r too expensive now. Ok, once I have mentioned her rate it seems to me that if she makes a offer it is the result of negotiation.
So she offers to see me for $$$$$.5. Usually I would bite cuz shes hot. But this number comes from disrespectful negotiation. So I refuse to see her cuz her new rate is too high for me and lower rate was negotiation. Her site goes on and on about disrespect of negotiation. Lots of girls charge less than $$$$$ without insulting by negotiating. I just go see them instead. Now instead of $$$$$ I pay $$$ or $$ and get twice as much. She did me a nice favor.
But the girl is pissed. She didnt grandfather me cuz I only saw her one time. If she raise her rates and she wants to grandfather it is up to her to tell me. Her site says no negotiating cuz it is so disrespectful. So I wouldn't see her at new rate because she only offered cuz I said her price was too high for me. Other guys will pay her new $$$$$$$ rate and it wont be too high for them. But she says it isn't negotiating if she offered. I said it is negotiating cuz she only offered when I said she charged to much. I say $$$$$.5 is less than $$$$$$$ and she says at least $$$$$.5 is bigger than 0 so it is okay.
I like her fine shes pretty and gives great bbbj whats not to like? Tell me am I being wrong to not allow break her own rules and disrespect her? Isnt it better to see a girl at a cheaper rate than to see girl who feels disrespect by negotiating? She says I am wrong. She says business is slow so she is better off I see her and thats no disrespect. I say if she wants to negotiate she should change rules on her site. Or change her rates back.
Seems like you raise rates to have less clients and I was one who went away and that's okay. That's the reason to raise rate. So why should she complain?
Am I wrong? Should I see her at $$$$$.5 before she gets to mad to see me?
If the girl wants to change her rates for you, then so be it. You didn't negotiate, you stated that her new rate was too high for you and she came down. It is her choice. Don't be a martyr.
Maybe she enjoys your company and/or considers that you may become a regular. In both those instances, rates frequently change.
Okay, this seems really strange and petty. It's not a matter of 'respect'. That's on the site to discourage rude guys from emailing saying, 'yo, you hot, but how bout half?'. You did not ask for a discount. She offered one. If she's worth it, go see her. If not, then don't see her.
Arguing with her about she runs her business will only get your phone calls unanswered. You may not understand her, but what else is new. We're women, we're complicated. See her if you want, and don't if you don't want to. There's lots of other bbj-givers in the sea.
Or, if you're all that concerned for her self-respect pay her double. She won't argue.
Lovely lady initiates contact with you, thinks enough of the one time you saw her that when you were honest and said that her new rate was beyond your budget, she makes an unsolicited offer of a lower rate and you stand on some misguided "principle" that the lady posted to discourage haggling over price? Really? I've received an unsolicited offer of a lower price at the end of a first session when the lovely provider felt comfortable with me, we'd become friendly, and we realized that given logistics it would have been a very convenient arrangement for both of us. But that wasn't negotiating or haggling, it was her setting her own price. Your lady did the same. Should you see her at $$$$$.5? Only you can answer that question. But raising the"no negotiating" issue is ridiculous.
Take a stand if that is your principle, but her rate is her rate. If she raises it, you don't have to see her. You voted and don't know it. Besides, "hot" is relative. Go see her at 5 AM sans make-up and other gear. Is she still hot? I doubt it. Move on if she's out of your wallet's strike zone. Like you say, there's just as good and sometimes better for less. When a provider says she want $$$$$$ she's also voting for the type of well-heeled guy that can pay her what she thinks she's worth. Don't be mad at her if she can get it.
I have men I have seen for years and never raised their donation they do. Treat a friend right and it will be returned in most cases. Someone I have seen once will be at the new rate unless I saw them in the last 4 months.
Now saying what I have if she offered to give you a lower price why would you not see her. You did contact her so I am confused. She would not offer if she wasn't comfortable with the offer.
Kisses Haley
Just what is so fucking disrespectful about saying $$$$$ is too much, and I won't see you at that rate?
Since when, in any business, do sellers dictate to buyers what is the only "proper way" to buy their services?
Don't men in this country have any fucking balls, even when dealing with prostitutes?
Let's see if I understand this. If a lady has a stated rate of $X for implied services it's OK for you to ask her to give you those services for $x - $y, right? If accepted this negotiation benefits the hobbyist to the detriment of the provider.
Based on that logic, it would also be OK for her to have a stated rate of $X for implied services and then ask for $x + $y when you arrive, aka upsell. If accepted this negotiation benefits the lady to the detriment of the hobbyist.
In both cases, an offer is made by the party seeking the advantage and is either accepted or denied. No harm, no foul.
Although I find each version more than a bit tacky I won't begrudge someone's right to do it. But I do take issue with hypocrisy. So if you are a provider or a hobbyist that seeks the advantage in this scenario you should not get an attitude when presented with the opposing tactic.
Personally, I prefer to do my hobbying in an environment that does not resemble the Moroccan bazaar from "Casa Blanca."
So, actually, yes, sellers DO dictate terms to buyers. All the time. "No shirt, no shoes, no service"- ring a bell?
The fact that you put it in terms as you did ("even when")... well, nice of you to feel morally superior to your prostitute by virtue of not being one, and it obviously makes you think you're a manly man, but this is like feeling morally superior to your butcher while chowing down on your steak.
Good for you, though- you'll show those hookers who's boss! Go have a cookie, big man!
You post under an alias, so I assume you have none!
its fucking rude for her to negotiate with you and then claim you to be an asshole if you negotiate with her. fuck her. far as i'm concerned this is a buyers market. if she wants business she will learn to deal with supply/demand.
In monger haunts around the world you are expected to negotiate. American providers have so polluted the minds of American hobbyists that when they visit popular monger haunts they mess it up for everyone.
While in the U.S.A, I don't negotiate, I have my maximum $$$ limit and I stick to it. I'm real happy with the ladies I see.
While in the U.S.A, I don't negotiate, I have my maximum $$$ limit and I stick to it. I'm real happy with the ladies I see.
Cased closed.
I also want everyone here to visit the MN board because they could use some good ol' fashion shut the hell up. Guys here (In MN) are too nice to say ANYTHING wrong. I would just for once love to see the east coast come on in.
You are correct, if you don't negotiate, you will be a taken for a naive moron. I also agree with your upper limit. Mine is the same and will not go above. It is essential to set limits on the hobby money otherwise you will be homeless and without friends.
One more thing I don't do is call a provider and ask for rate, it is awkward for me so, if they don't have rates on their ads, I do not call.
While in the U.S.A, I don't negotiate, I have my maximum $$$ limit and I stick to it. I'm real happy with the ladies I see.
It is disrespectful to the client to call him up and to ask for a session, then to start negotiating when he says no when you the provider does not allow him to negotiate, now that is being a hypocrite. And no I don't have a problem with special rates for regulars as that is a way to reward repeats. But, to call and start haggling that is just rude, especially after only one session. I can't believe I am actually agreeing with Jack_Schitt. I will never haggle over sex for money ever as I find it disrespectful to both me and the lady and a distraction from the fun.
Just starting out about 1.5 years ago and pre-VIP, I called someone from their ad who had no $-figure. I discretely got the info I needed but it was too high ($$$$$$$). After recovering my breath, I declined but thanked her and SHE started negotiating, 'How much were you looking for?' I dodged that with that I didn't want to put her in a position where she didn't feel adequately compensated. '$$$$$' Thanks, but really .... '$$$$ and if you write a review, $$$.5' But here's what I felt then and now: She felt she was worth 7. As soon I get a discount, even if only to 6.98 let alone 3.50, I'm sure she feels cheated somehow or that she lost face in the negotiation and that it would effect our time together.
The exceptions to that are advertised specials, those that I've met before (grandfathered) or those that I feel comfortable with the "sound" of their adjustment, there being a difference between the disappointed begrudging "Well, since you didn't know about the rate increase ..." versus a friendly, funny, not disappointed and comfortable sounding "Well, since you didn't know about the rate increase ... No problem, I'd love to see you!" (That doesn't happen anymore because I'm VIP and better informed BEFORE I make the call.)
You didn't "negotiate"...so there's no "disrespect".
Mostly that part of a website is designed for the loser scumbags who have never seen her...but email with the dumbest crap imaginable. Fat ugly stinky (no offense) 
guys who make ridiculous "offers" with the mindset that 'it never hurts to ask'. Ladies...am I wrong here?
She asked why you didn't come back. You responded honestly. She offered a deal.
WTF is there to think about???
You are over-thinking the shit out of this...for no reason. Forget about what you "think" she should change on her site. That's not your place.
If you like her....like the rate....then go back and have fun.
Easy Peasy.
Just sayin'
She says "no-negotiating on her website". Her willingness to create a rate demonstrates that clause is obviously subject to when a client calls her bluff and won't bite.
You say you don't want to see a provider with a no-negotiation clause but want to know if you should go for it anyway before she becomes too angry to see you at all.
You're both playing games. If you want to see her you should accept the rate that she's offered and call it a day. Before you accept the rate you need to make sure that you're both adult enough to enter into an intimate situation so that the session doesn't degenerate into a grudgefuck in which she takes out the discount on you by giving you a fraction of her service and you subsequently emotionally abuse her for it.
As far as negotiation goes, we've all seen the platitudes about "no-negotiation".
For providers who are legitimately low-volume, part time providers or those whose self-esteem is unfortunately entangled in the business of selling their body this clause will never be breached.
For a large number of full time providers these clauses are rhetoric, cues that providers who are afflicted with groupthink take to reassure themselves that they are of a different caliber than other sex workers.
Though I don't flaunt my friendships or associations in this business, I associate with exceptional women who offer various models in many markets.
I can tell you right now providers from $200 an hour to $4000+ per 2 hour introduction, under-the-radar, over-the-radar, strippers to established professionals engage in some form of negotiation at one point or another. Be it offering alternative hourly rates or agreeing to X amount of days at X discount for a client that she's traveled with on multiple occasions - nearly all independent providers will make alternative considerations for known clients at some point and sometimes even unknown clients.
As a provider who has offered many public rate and time-based incentives I would say that my negotiation is less likely to be hourly based and more likely to be a situation where I agree to waive my hourly travel fee ($100 per hour of drive time in New England) for an appointment 8 hours or greater in duration. My line of thinking is why I hit a client coming and going with a travel fee for an appointment which will net me nearly $2000? A known client who I've spent literally hundreds of hours with, traveled with and enjoy a considerable friendship with invited me for an overnight last week. He asked if he could be grandfathered at my former overnight rate v. my current overnight rate.
We had plans which included additional costs of approximately $1k including the gifts he's shared with me. That is technically negotiation (and of course I accepted those terms).
Tell me, where are these providers who would play hardball with a known client who has placed a reasonable offer on the table?
For the provider who feels that she has to assert dominance over a client by enforcing rigid rules because she believes that is what her peers are doing behind closed doors, I feel sorry for her- she'll likely leave this business with nothing to show for it. For the provider who feels that they have to refuse bend in order to maintain an image which she believes is the only way to effectively sell to a segment which constitutes a 1% percentage of clientele I wish her luck.
For the rest of us who live in the real world and see things in this business as they truly are, there is nothing inappropriate, seedy, sleezy about two adults coming to a reasonable agreement between themselves.
I've had the privilege of meeting some of the most incredible, well-heeled and recognized men during my time as a provider- nearly all of whom I would have never had an opportunity to cross paths with if it were not for my time as a provider. I've also met some of the most highly rated, regarded and/or legitimately exclusive (as in cannot be found anywhere) providers.
Let me just say that clients and providers who put on the most airs typically don't have a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out of.
The business of meeting a provider, engaging with a provider via correspondence etc. is quite like a seductive dance- it can truly set the stage for what occurs upon meeting and consummation.
I would agree that this delicious anxiety shouldn't be colored with tacky negotiations.
But once a client and a provider have an established relationship? Why shouldn't either party be able to make inquiries or requests regarding compensation?
Providers and clients alike need to remove the ego from the business transaction, be communicative, speak directly, respect one another and be prepared to walk away without hurt feelings if the needs or desires of either party aren't met.
It's really that simple. Good luck with this woman- you and she both need to keep it real and on a direct, adult level.
It is not OK for providers to call there clients and haggle with them especially after one visit as the OP implied in his opening statement. Thing are different after you have built a relationship and a certain level of openness that the OP obviously did not have with this provider. Because of this the ladies actions were inappropriate, especially the calling him and asking for business part. Part of what we as clients pay for is for you to go away after unless we state otherwise by word or action. I canceled service from more than on business because of there unwanted solicitations why should this business be any different? In fact because of the personal and secretive nature of this business unwanted solicitations even more unpalatable. It is not a matter of ego but of respect for space and privacy in my opinion. I do see your point of view and agree in principle when there is an established relationship but if there is not an established relationship it is simply not acceptable solicit a session let alone negotiate a price.
In the beginning of my time as a provider I was rather aggressive and contacted any and everyone I thought should be interested in me and clients with whom I wasn't really established.
4 years removed I've learned that unsolicited contact is largely inappropriate. I generally refrain from it, including mass email communications and personal invitations to clients that I've seen less than a dozen or so times.
I have a core group of regulars who largely support my business- they enjoy and invite communication and invitations, especially when they know that I'm not holding a general incall.
She wrote this person randomly after raising her rate and then started playing games. Highly inappropriate and I would definitely agree.
Doesn't even make any kind of sense-
A provider raises her rate from $500 to $700, writes a relatively new client she's only seen once and then refuses to grandfather him? If anything her email should have been accompanied with an invitation to grandfather him. He calls her bluff, she moves to $550.
Huh? Yeah, okay. She needs to recite
"Louis Vuitton never goes on sale and neither do I" 100x or until it actually means something more to her than "the rent is due" and he needs to stick to girls who are honest, straight shooters regardless of whether they charge $300 or $1k.
"Now instead of $$$$$ I pay $$$ or $$ and get twice as much. "
Why would you even think about going back if you're happier with the lower priced ladies? You're not making much sense.
She then countered the offer. If you want to see her at that point, then do so. Just be sure to reflect in your review if you think her performance suffered due to the negotiation process.
Sounds like it is time for you move on and tell her that you are not interested. Tell her that you are not into playing games.
Ya'll are both wrong. You shouldn't have negotiated with her period but she opened the door when she "made you an offer" so this is all a big mess.
Any time any one argues principle over money it is really about the money. If her add read 5 then it should be 5. You would not take a 12 pack off the shelf with a sign that read 5 and go to the cashier and let the charge 7. Your error was in not calling her on it then. I am sure you are pissed as I would be but you let her take advantage of you and now I think your driving the point home. Thank her for her time and tell her how you really feal that she took you for a couple extra and your pissed. And tell her to change her add. I cant believe that your the only one she has done this with. So I hope you posted a review. And no I am not asking that you out her here but a review with the story for Your fellow hobbiests who I am sure would like to know.
Offering a discount is not a negotiation. If you responded with an offer of $$$$$.25 that would be negotiating, IMO. Why argue the point with her and insist she's negotiating when she wants to think she isn't? That's hardly a turn on for either of you. You could simply respond by saying, "Sorry, you were great but $$$$$ really is my upper limit." No disrespect, no haggling. She can say OK to your limit or you can accept her offer of a discount, if you want to, without disrespecting her or yourself. Just as it's fine for a provider to set her price, it's fine for a hobbyist to set his limit.
She says "no negotiating" on her site because she wants to control whom she is willing to be kind to. Not everyone warrants additional consideration and it's up to her to decide when and with whom she is comfortable doing so
She is correct, it isn't negotiating if she offered.
I think you don't understand things from the perspective of someone with a website. It is perfectly common for complete strangers who have not even made one date to write asking for the lady to consider a first date at a gift lower then one the one she posted. Or, there are gents who have not treated her in a way that made her feel comfortable with them and so she may choose not to offer grandfathering.
She is trying to be nice to you, show you she appreciated the time you shared before her rates when up. So rather then accept her gesture of allowing her to grandfather you, instead she gates a lecture about negotiation. I think your view is judgmental and unsympathetic. You seem to have righteous bend.
Frankly, if a gent did that to me, I'd never see him again at any rate. It's much nicer to spend time with people who treat you with the empathy and friendship, then ones who get hung up over the wording of a website like a bored lawyer.