I have seen posts where the guys have complained about providers keeping their old emails.

Well today I get an email from a guy who saved MY email from 5 years ago (just a month into the business too) that he saved and forwarded back to me.  OMG what a shock that was.  AND because he had it, he thought that was enough proof that we have seen each other.

Guys (and gals) do NOT save old emails.  Do you really want a wife/girlfriend/SO or worse find them?  3 simple words.... DELETE DELETE DELETE

Of course I have no wife/girlfriend/SO/boss etc that I need to hide my emails from. I also don't make incriminating statements via e-mails.

I treat all guns as if they are loaded, and I treat all emails as if they might be made public someday.

Do the two of you encourage providers to do the same?

i delete only spam/junk mail, or occasionally i'll go through and delete some one line back and forth messages with an old friend. otherwise, i save it all and i regularly transfer to cd as well...i do this for many reasons, not the least of which is personal safety, but also because it is a part of my life, my history, and to me that is something to treasure. it also comes in handy when i can look up some obscure tidbit from years ago and pleasantly surprise a longtime friend.

my emails are in no way incriminating, though many are lengthy and include a great deal of discussion about philosophy, sociology, psychology, anthropology, world history, and other such topics of interest. i also have no one to hide from...my Husband has full access to my email...one of the many benefits of living an authentic life...you just don't have to worry about these things.

And how careless we are, don't really give a shit about discretion, etc. Meanwhile, virtually every email I get from a guy I have seen or spoken to before, is basically a continuation of our last correspondence. Whether it was yesterday or last year. Seriously. Just last week I get an email from a guy that I saw about a year ago. And guess what. Though I myself didn't still have any records in my email of our conversation, it was right there in his email. NONE of my regulars ever send me an email that they freshly typed up. I guess they just go through their inbox and find my last email to them and reply to it. Go figure. Funny how that works.

for me to keep the e-mails...I am Not the one contacting them....they are contacting me...and I have to say...when I haven't seen someone in a long time...it makes everything much more simplier when they use the old e-mail...it brings back memories of our last encounter and it makes it that much more easier to pick up where we left off...I'm just sayin for myself

world and that includes pictures, tweets, toots, whatever.

Now, as far as I'm concerned I have hundreds...NO Thousands!.....maybe MILLIONS! of emails from providers that have begged me...some sobbing...to come back and see them.

Yep...they'll even pay me. Here's a typical one I've saved:

Dear ChannelGuy
Oh My God!  You are incredible in the sack.  The way your soft dick entered me and wobbled around...well, it was amazing.  And then your premature squirt...so surprising and so, well...different.   I can't believe the DATY session.  Why did you take 19 minutes to find my clit?  I gotta know...so please come see me again.

I want to video tape our session so I can show my friends.  I told them all about it but they all said "nnaahh..no way that could happen!"

Please, please call me again.  I need to show them I wasn't on drugs.

Ms. Provider XXOO


See!  I kept it and what more proof do you need that I'm a damn stud in bed?

Emails...never die.

That you and I have similar dates? I mean, what are the odds?

And, I'm assuming, they're with different ladies?!

WTF!

Seems like you and I should compare notes and share info so as the ladies we see will know infact what they're in for.

Don't you think?

Damn!  Maybe you're right!  My memory is really going away....not only the same date but could it have been at the same time??!!!

If we did compare notes and we did find out it was the same ladies....would that make us cousins?

'cause just the other night a guy called me a "fucking cousin?"    

Us sharing info sounds like some United Nations violation...

I don't have my email address attached to a public website or an ad.
Yes, there is a difference. It may take some time for you, but think about that.

The only thing you have right is that emails should be deleted. Congrats on your brainstorm.

You take what should be a simple "I agree, delete the e-mails" and manage to turn it into an insult.

It comes across that your butt is more important to protect than hers.  Bet she would disagree.

In general, your email address is publicly available; listed on sites, listed on review boards, listed on advertisements, etc. Just like the phone number for Best Buy.

This is, as many providers emphasize, a BUSINESS. Right?

So what on earth is the problem with a client saving an email from you just as if he were dealing with *any other business*?

Or is it NOT a business?

(BTW, I DO retain emails; but I do so on servers I personally control; under layers of encryption etc. So while information is retained, it is pretty danged secure. WAY more secure than simply hitting a "delete" button.)

In addition, discretion is YOUR BUSINESS.

I realize that some ladies and gentlemen suffer under the idea that the envelope is for sex. And, in a sense, it may be so because if all ladies offered was conversation their rates would drop precipitously.

Women are not being paid hundreds of dollars per pop just for sex. They are being paid hundreds of dollar a pop for two things, without which a provider couldn't book a client for sex at any price:

1. Discretion. You promise to take my secrets with you to the grave.
2. No strings attached. I have been stalked relentlessly by way too many civie girls in my life. You promise not to try to turn me into your boyfriend. If I wanted to be your boyfriend, I'd ask.

I can get plenty of indiscrete sex with likely strings anytime I want. I have (quite literally) groupies in some aspects of my life. I never touch them, because I don't want strings, and I don't want to hurt people's feelings.

If you started advertising that you would publicly post pictures of yourself with your clients (lack of discretion), or that you were an expert at turning clients into boyfriends at the expense of broken-up marriages; you couldn't sell your service even at 1/3rd of its current rate -- whatever that is.

So you are PAID -- and paid quite handsomely -- to be discreet. It is a core competency of your profession and a very reasonable expectation.

Now, I do not personally expect you to delete things necessarily. I simply expect your information retention to be SECURE. Either that, or for our email content to be such that nobody would ever guess from it that we have ever had sex or planned to. Simple.

So let me repeat that you are paid, and quite handsomely, to be discreet and to not attach strings to me. The envelope pays for your silence and for you to forego many of the things that a civie girl might otherwise reasonably expect from me.

Maybe we'll be friends at some point, but that's a separate issue.

That's the provider side.

On the hobbyist side; to a certain extent, whatever serves YOUR interests, also serves mine. So you can very reasonably expect me to take YOUR secrets to the grave with me, and for me not to try to turn you into a girlfriend either.

You can expect me to maintain some reasonable degree of security on our correspondence. And I do. I maintain a degree of security that is quite impressive. Your data is safe.

Even though you aren't paying me. I do that, not to protect you so much as to protect myself; but you are an adjunct beneficiary of the effort.

In practice, I tend to be a repeat client. Maybe not often, but a repeater nevertheless. So OF COURSE I retain some info in order to make it easier for me to give you money.

Just like I do with any other business with whose efforts I am satisfied.

MY end of this business is to be a good client (with all that entails) and have real orgasms.

Your end of this business is to show me a really good time, collect your fee, keep my secrets, and avoid romantic entanglement.

Easy.

Doing mass emails to clients in which every one of your clients gets to see all of your other clients is a DISASTER.

Many hobbyists (though not I) use regular business emails for hobbying. [email protected] for example. When I get that email address, I essentially know who the hell he is. Maybe I'm his brother in law for all you know.

On the other hand, I have never sent a mass email to a bunch of providers. Why in the world would I?

Mass emails are sent by businesses, not their clients.

And it is incumbent upon the businesses doing the sending, particularly when discretion is a core competency, to use some basic sense. If the lady doesn't know how to use an email client safely; she should get training.

Can't gals defend themselves properly? Or do Mangina's like yourself always have to get your tampon in a twist and come to their rescue?

Next time Pigly Man gets bitch-slapped I hope you pull down your skirt and come to my rescue!!

Pigly Man (glad to see you recognized the resemblance) thanks for making my morning.  The laugh at your post was a good way to start.

Since that put me in a good mood I’ll answer very simply:

1.  Only a person directly attacked in a post is allowed to reply/have an opinion?  Then why did you reply to my post?  You aren’t Blown-Bulb, are you?

2.  I reply that way to Pigly attitudes from men or women.  Drop me a line the next time you feel bitch-slapped and if I agree I’ll say so.

3.  Try running in your favorite skirt.  See if you can run faster with it pulled down.  Maybe you have enough practice that you can.  Personally I don’t.

Have a great day.  Hope you find a nice mud hole.

Content is Queen..."....or for our email content to be such that nobody would ever guess from it that we have ever had sex or planned to....".
Then what is the harm in saving my email as I/we have nothing to fear.

If a gentleman is not so discreet and places potentially incriminating content, I do not reply, I delete and then block.

Mass email..never done it, never will.

I asked a question.  You posted a vacuous non-answer.  Compare that to johngaultnm's post below.  His is well thought out, addresses the issue at hand.  Yours is juvenile, but then that might fit you, I don't know.  See the difference?  Hope so but I'm not holding my breath.

I agree that the most important thing is security of the email and discretion in email.  I don't delete any emails from anyone.

I want to hear from more providers about this, but it seems that only one has a problem with it so far.

http://www.yidio.com/im-in-the-mood-for-love-alfalfamov/id/4266386905

Will you serenade her now?

Agree mass e-mails are never good.  A provider not understanding how to use e-mail safely is dangerous.  Disagree stupid e-mail tricks only happen with providers though they happen more often with them.  Unnamed TX city a while ago a guy DID send a mass e-mail to all the provider e-mails he had saying he had an urgent need for a session and first one to reply got his business.  Seen tirades about that kind of thing a few times.

Agree discretion is a core competency for a provider.  Also think it is a core competency for a client in this business.

Agree I keep info on businesses I am happy with and might use again.  Disagree that requires I keep their e-mails.  Businesses also keep info on clients they have had, not saying that requires e-mails either.

Agree if a guy is going to keep info/e-mails/etc he has a responsibility to do so with good security.  It isn’t that hard.  I would expect using good security is gender independent.  Biggest reason I can see a provider keeping info is to alleviate future screening.  Guy:  “Hey Girl, can we meet tomorrow?  You know me, I’m Tony.  The very average looking, very nondescript client you saw 6 mos ago.  Did nothing wrong but nothing memorable either.”  Her:  “Nope.  Sorry, I don’t recall you.  You’ll have to get screened again.”  Guy:  scratches her and moves to the next option.  It is good business to keep info on a client that allows a provider to make him think he was far more memorable than he actually was.

The content of my correspondence with providers is virtually indistinguishable from the content of my correspondence with others.

That just happens to be my preference. I'd rather correspond with a smart lady about a mutually interesting topic than about sex. The sex part can be covered quite thoroughly in person. LOL

I would suggest that CarolinaDrama didn't care  to take the time to insult you less succinctly.

Given a choice between reading a "juvenile" post like his, or a sappy, suck up post like most of yours, I'll take juvenile any day of the week. lmao

Not all providers deal with other providers; so mass emailing them was insane.

The only time I include more than one email in anything to providers is when I introduce two providers to each other for screening purposes: "Jane, please meet Jill; Jill, please meet Jane." (I do it this way so there is no question that the verification request is legitimate and that I have approved the sharing of info between those two ladies.)

Either way, I stand corrected on that one. That guy was crazy!

Not only do I not mind that providers retain my info; I encourage them to do so. All I care is that it is retained securely and not shared with anyone that I haven't previously approved for sharing.

After reading yours I would be schocked if you ever agreed with something I said.

And I don't care if you do.

x

By the way, whether or not I agree with your posts I always read them.  Well thought out and often thought provoking.  Wish there were more of those on here.

I am glad at least "some" providers get it.

Ally, you nailed it.

Hobbyists are not going to be targeted by LE, or if they are, it's not going to be about the hobby, and LE certainly isn't going to go down the list of providers the hobbyist has seen in an effort to make their life miserable. Unfortunately the same cannot be said in reverse.

You also nailed the reason many/most hobbyists make their email correspondences a continuation of earlier conversations. Many providers get literally thousands of emails, expecting them to remember every single guy they have seen or corresponded with is unreasonable, (unless you are unforgettable like myself, lol). Using an existing thread of conversation save the lady from possibly insulting the hobbyist by her not having to ask who the fuck he is.

You are that Guy that is unforgettable...the question is...is it in a good way or a bad way...lol...but either way I bet is Very Naughty

And generally, I give plenty of material with which folks can disagree!  (*grin*)

I doubt he and I will ever see eye to eye, his head is so far up the ass of the providers, it's impossible to see his eyes.

She hijacked his email account and phone.  Whispers of a PI.    There is likely to be traumatic fall out.

One idiot sent me my address as proof that one of my friends had seen him. Problem being the lady was retired and I've never seen him - yet he'd kept that email for over a year in his inbox!

I also once received postal letters to my registered business addy from a wife.

I get pretty upset when my security is compromised. When women have to up and move, when we have to worry about your wife, pending divorce proceedings, and private investigators.

There is no difference - security and discretion are the responsibility of BOTH parties.

You and I, metaphorically speaking, are in symbiosis. Without me (the hobbyist), there is no you (the provider); and without you, there is no me. We are interdependent; thus anything that helps one, helps both. Anything that hurts one, hurts both.

As I've stated, I use high security techniques for dealing with email. I do this primarily for my own security; but it has the adjunct benefit of also protecting yours.

Hopefully, you do the same.

And when we keep each other safe; we improve each others quality of life.

I was not aware that hobbyists; particularly those with wives, would be so lax about security; but I stand corrected.

So far, to the best of my knowledge; I have not yet seen a provider post that, in the event of accidental pregnancy of a provider carried to term, the hobbyist should NOT be on the hook to be daddy. (At least financially.)

In other words, it seems to me that in general, providers expect hobbyists to accept full financial responsibility for the sex act; should it come to that.

I'm not discussing the inner aspects of that idea; except to note that it exists; and steps outside the idea of "no strings attached" because it is one helluva string.

Well, some of the situations you have described are analogous. There have been some prominent cases in which wives have successfully sued their husband's mistresses for both the direct costs as well as alienation of affection, etc. pertaining to the sex act.

So just as an aggrieved party on the provider's side who is entitled to compensation (the child) may seek it through legal channels; so may an aggrieved party on the hobbyist's side who is entitled to compensation (the wife).

BOTH parties, therefore, assume legal risks in the sex act.

And they both assume moral/ethical risks as well. In no way do I see either party as morally/ethically superior to the other. "Just a job/hobby" is not a "get out of ethical jail free" card.

I agree, BTW, that both should do what they can to minimize risks to each other because of the symbiotic nature of the arrangement. But it should be understood that a situation simply cannot exist in which one party assumes all risks and the other assumes all rewards. Both risks and rewards are shared.

The median hourly rate for a general surgeon is $142/hr. The median hourly rate for a (literal) brain surgeon is $224/hr.

In general, I pay more for providers than I would for a brain surgeon. That's because she is giving me discretion, (mostly) no strings, and assuming shared risks. Not just because she's pretty.

Ladies. I never accept email & it hasn't hurt my buisness at all. A option to consider if you want to protect your privacy.

do not advise ladies to to anything one eway or another.
When it comes to the possibility of the contects being seen by others, I will repeat what mt attorney said to me...
"so what!?"

-- Modified on 5/29/2010 2:08:54 AM