I am new to the hobby, and I am not having any luck.  I read many reviews on TER and Scorpsquide and chose an SP I was interested in.  I called her phone number, and left my name (same name as the phone is register to), two  contact numbers, the date time I wanted to meet, and waited.  Not hearing anything for four days, I followed up with another phone call, leaving the same information, and stating I had not heard from her, and was therefore following up.  Another 3-4 days and nothing.  So I went  back to her website, found her e-mail and sent the following e-mail, this time asking for an appointment on a day she stated she was available:

Subject
            I am X(my name) - this is more info about me      


X (X'd out here),
I have left you a couple of messages over the past 7-10 days.  However, given the
short time allowed for each message, I do not feel you have enough information
about me to give you a reason to return my call.

I am a white male, 5'11" (yes, I usually say I am 6'), 225lb, 36 y.o.  I live in X (X'd out here)
County, and work in X (X'd out here).  In addition to my full-time job, I have a sideline
business planning private paintball groups.  I am new to the hobby - my first
experience was earlier this year with two dancers from a club.

I have read many good things about you and X (her girlfriend) on TER and Scorps.  I would very
much like to meet you and X (her girlfriend) - if you would like, perhaps we can meet at a
restaurant for a late lunch or early dinner sometime.  If that goes well, we could set
up another meeting.  If this is not necessary, I am still very interested in a 1 pm visit
Friday, October 18 (solo or duo).

Please do me the honor of responding.  My cell number is X, my work
number is X, and my sideline business number is X.  All of
these are private numbers - voicemails on any can only be retrieved by me.  Thank
you for reading this message.

I thought I needed to supply a large amount of information since I have no references to give, and being new to the hobby, I do not wish to appear as LE.

I would appreciate advice for members or SP's.  My e-mail address is [email protected].

Thanks.

My advice would be to check the multitude of listings
and find another provider. As independent contractors these
women tend to take off when it strikes them (I respect
that - there are tons of great airfare deals right now) and don't always post this on their websites or change their voicemail (security reasons). And if you selected one who is very popular she may be booked and/or not taking new clients.

We all know that feeling - get really revved up to see a woman after finding her picture on the Net only to find out that you can't make contact.

"Perhaps we can meet for dinner" sounds like you want a freebee visit to check each other out for a possible future paid visit. Ain't gonna happen. If that's not what you mean, then say you want a dinner "date".

Thanks for the advice - a "dinner date" is what I was asking for as a way to put her mind at ease that I was serious about meeting her, not a creep, and not LE.

in no way to a paid session, so she probably deleted it.

Some women may think the paintball reference means people who spray paint on others and vandalize, which is not a very useful reference either.

If you had given a city reference and kind of lady you like, the responses could have been far more helpful.
Many of us have substantial databases and can cut & paste several suggestions quickly. Bonobos for example keep about 1000 potential mating partners review references for travels through the jungle.

"I thought I needed to supply a large amount of information since I have no references to give, and being new to the hobby, I do not wish to appear as LE."

This line appeared in your post.  I don't know for sure if it was in the e-mail to the provider, but if it was:

Most providers I know IMMEDIATELY discard any message that even just mentions LE, as yours does.  The reason is that they believe that if you say anything regarding the topic, you possibly have something to do with LE. And even the possibility will scare them off. Rightfully so, IMHO.

Insofar as the phone messages are concerned, it's likely that she may be touring, or on a vacation for now.  As mentioned above, see if you can find other providers to your liking. Good Luck.

Number ONE, you mentioned LE. Just mentioning them make some people nervous.

Number two, a HUGE red flag that glazes over my eyes and screams "time waster" is wanting her to grab her friend thus requiring the dovetailing of TWO busy ladies' schedules and have a dinner with you ON SPEC to "see how things go". Or did you mean this is a paid date? It didn't sound like it though. Honestly this is probably the time she stopped reading or listening.

Also you mentioned your first personal experience was with "two dancers from a club" Third red flag. Um...totally different mindset there. The dancer mindset is generally more tease and grab your cash. So you happened to get some who took a fancy to you and you paid the price they wanted that day (scoring with dancers is fickle and undependable and their attitude changes from girl to girl or even from hour to hour!) Telling her your first experience in the hobby was bagging two strippers from a club is not a good reference, trust me.

And this is my own opinion - the fourth problem was too much personal info. It's a big yawn on the first query. You probably lost her halfway through. We get a lot of mail, you know. Ditto with sending huge bandwidth sucking photos of yourself. Can't tell you how many times I've found I was hotmail was bouncing my e-mail because some bozo sent me some giant 300k photo of himself. And please NO nude photos unless she actually says these exact words "Please oh please send me a nude photo of yourself"

Just say: My name is John Smith. I found you through TER. I am available afternoons although I prefer 4pm-8pm. I would like to set something up as soon as possible. Please let me know what information you need from me.

Thanks,
John Smith
(xxx) xxx-xxxx

************************

Of course now that you've already contacted her several times by phone and e-mail she's probably already made her decision not to see you.

Or she could just be out of town.



-- Modified on 10/18/2002 5:21:00 PM

I don't know...I read the reviews on TER. I pick up the phone. I make an appointment to see whoever I want, and always make contact.

I can't for the life of me figure out why this has been made so complicated.

Get a grip, take a deep breath, and move ON... she is either not interested or not available. Try contacting another provider sooner or later you'll make a connection!

Sometimes if a provider reads an email and if there is anything that just doesn't sit well she completely disregard the email.
My advice to you would be to see another provider that is known in this area.  Then contact the lady again with a reference.  You may have made her nervous.  Another thing do not contact her again until you have the reference.  A lady does not want a stalker and if she gets sick of you calling and emailing her she will never see you.

Good luck

incorrect. (maybe I should change my screen name to "rebelprovider")
Anyway, please don't be offended but, May I ask you if you are a black man? I am basing this soley on your screen name and have no preference or opinion in regards to race as I am an equal opportunity provider.
But, some girls do not see men or different color or race and some target specific races, i.e. Blacks...(I'm not going to say "Afro-American. Its so condescending) That MAY be an issue if you are. Who knows? Move on and pick another hottie. There are lots of girls out there ready, willing and able where race is not an issue.
good luck!
xoxoxo
Carol of Palm Springs

Sounds like you ain't getting Cap'n Crunch w/ Crunchberries....
so try another flavor.  No sense waiting on this one. Move on, call others.  It's not about her now, it's YOU - you now have a hang-up over this provider.

Get over it and call others.  I wouldn't mention being new to the hobby prior to meeting her, it could set you up for abuse or she may not want to deal with it.  
Once you meet her, if you have some chemistry together, maybe you whisper into her ear that it's your first time - she may take it as a challenge and you could benefit.

Perhaps you'll end up giving her a 'natural' breakfast

Thank you for everyone who provided advice - I will try again, with a different SP, and provide less information initially.  I guess I just wanted to put forth a good image, and ended up looking like a geeky ninth grader at his first senior prom!