hassles, headaches and other forms of drama, basically.

The sexual experience can certainly be equivilant, but providers usually trump civies because of their experience and the fact that they are competing for business more directly.

The only valid reason to see a civie, IMHO, is to establish a SO relationship for the purposes of getting married and raising a family, etc.

For me it is the providers. They give me variety and the strong cummings of a life time.

I also get to do things the SO does not do at home such a greek.

a provider; well, actually two. Other than that, my best experiences have been with SO's, except a threesome, and I haven't done anything with an SO that I haven't done with a provider. But, I've never had a time with a provider that I've ever regretted, and it's always been exciting, which I can't say about some SO's.

A large part of that is sex is better when it means something. Sex does not always mean something between me and my wife, but often it does. I have never had sex mean a thing between a provider that I am paying and me. Wife wins hands down.

My wife does MORE than most providers




SO FAR!!!

but that was long ago in a land far far away.   I dig the making love part...  I love the cuddling & closeness...  but wife does not have any sex drive.  Zero.  
Providers...  are willing at times of the day when I am at my best, not after midnight when we're both exhausted & just want to get it over with OR hoping that there will be an excuse to avoid.  Providers are willing to do positions & activities (you'd call basic, like CG) but which are best for me but which wife removed from the menu years ago.  

Honestly, it is the rarest SO who has the sex drive & willingness to keep a man even reasonably satisfied.   Ladies, if you are, my hat's off to you.   IF my wife even came close to keeping me happy, I'd be out of the hobby.  
skb

with the wife (SO) as you do with a provider.

When was the last time you showered, shaved and put those candles out for the "session"?

How about adding DFK (LFK) with the wife (SO)?

How about DATY with that wife (SO)?

How about that special "date" night with an expensive dinner and romance?

One of the things this hobby has been teaching me has been how I need to address that same intensity at home.  As I look back where I was with my wife (two years ago when I began this journey and we have been married nearly 30 years) and where I have brought the same ambience into our bedroom has, albeit slowly, brought some of those old sparks and sex back.  Has my wife reached the levels of many of the gals I have seen here?  Not quite, and perhaps never will.  But considering how far things had drifted off over the years, I am rather happy with the direction that things in my home have been going.

What this hobby has taught me is it takes two to tango.  And you will only get out of this (the SO/wife sex) what you put into it.

But also based on what some guys have written, it appears they have perhaps tried and given up on this.  But for those who are striving to find that commonality, keep on working at it.  

I certainly plan on continuing...and hopefully that full, erotic element that the gals here provide will once again be fully met in my own bedroom.

You are right about not collecting from a GF, and that makes a guy more comfortable because he doesn't look at the time. A GF can do almost anything on the menu. Some GF I have been with are okay in performance, while others are great. As with providers, I can say that I am always on a time constraint, and it ruins the experience sometimes. Sure, I had great sex with some providers and terrible sex with others. If weighing the pros and cons in terms of sex experience overall, I would have to say with a GF because everything is on the menu and you can do it anytime.

I personally see providers because it is easy to get laid. It broadens my experiences with other ladies (mixing it up from time to time). Finally, the somewhat excitement of the journey. You ask, so I said it loosely as I can.

best head= provider
best sex= friend w/ benifits