Everybody gets busy and we can't always be priority.

Or perhaps you simply were a fool, and there came a point where she saw that and it was nor ok with her.

That's just one possibility.

There are all sorts of people on both sides of the equation of these very personal, intimate arrangements. There are many reasons why either side decides to engage in the arrangement, and how far either is comfortable in being involved.

With all those possible combinations, there is usual one fairly consistent perspective that one will find from either side of the equation. That is, most people do NOT want an arrangement with another person who desires, becomes or expects a significantly deeper involvement within the relationship than they do.

If that occurs, one should not be overly surprised if the other person decides to cut the arrangement off. The person making the decision to end the arrangement may be doing such because they see themselves as becoming too attached.

Sometimes this is done with no warning, no explanation, and no further contact to protect the deciding party from being talked out of there decision, especially if that party is a "sweet woman" who is caring and has trouble saying "no" to a persuasive man. It might alos be that the woman has no interest in di if that discovering if the man is the type who doesn't respond well to rejection.

I don't know if that happened to you, but if it did, the worst thing you can do if try to persue it.

If you seriously think that you might "go crazy" take the cash you would have spent on you next several sessions and go see a therapist. If that was just a characterization of you feelings at missing a greato provider, then don't lament over the situation - just get out their and book some sessions with a some well reviewed ladies.


HH

AdviceSeeker"I'm not overbearing. I don't contact her very often. I have recently though since I'm being ignored."

Practice with civvies. A lot of them . If you find one that will answer the phone when you call, you might try providers again.

 Don't assume she is ignoring you.
 She might be on vacation.

If she has the flu and you kept calling, it's likely she is done with you.

Calling, texting, or e mailing more than once without her reply is considered stalking, or definite signs of a desperate man by most women.

Maybe she is a kind person and realizes you are into her too much for your health.

...just might be what be what worries her.


HalfHour

"So, tell me about your mother."

:}
HH

of unbelievable photographs that we can daydream over as we patiently await for the time we might spend with you.


....sigh.


HalfHour

My ATF won't respond to me and I can't seem to get an explanation. I don't know what to do.

Does that sound heartless?  Fact is, she doesn't owe you an explanation and, in this business (Yes, it's a business. You give her $$$, she fucks you and pretends to like you.) that's just the way it is.  Now, please don't tell us you lent her money before this happened.

This is not unusual. There could be plenty of reasons having everything or nothing at all to do with you. There are plenty of fish in the sea. Getting hung up on one in particular only spoils the fun.

It's fine if she doesn't want to see me anymore, but I want to know why. Otherwise I'll go crazy.

I do this more for companionship than sex.

This is just like dealing with a civilian, you just gotta forget about it and move in.  The more your try the more she will get turned off. Move on.

She was the sweetest girl ever. Not easy to replace.

You may think you will, you may even FEEL you will but you won't.....

UNLESS you WILL! in which case you have right there a good reason for her to never see you again.

grow up.

you were probably HER ATF for a short time.  Then she found a new one, and you're overbearing.

Drop it and move on...find a new ATF, enjoy her until the same thing happens, and drop it and move on.

As much as it can be fun (and seemingly healthy) to have an ATF, like a smart lady said on here recently:

Stay diversified in your interests,

Woman are like buses..there will be another one along soon...Wink

-- Modified on 10/8/2011 5:06:48 PM

I had a similar problem alittle bit ago and everybody told me the same thing. Trust me when I say you won't go crazy and yes you will get over her. Trust me it is not healthy to get attached to a provider like that. I have an ATF also but I am no longer attched I am seeing other wonderful ladies out there. Yes she is probably gonna be hard to match but try not to compare other ladies to her. Think of them as a new adventure. In 2 days I am gonna see one lady that I was actually scared to see because she is so damn hot and also I am gonna see next saturday another one. they are 2 out of three highly reviewed and respected ladies in my area. trust me when I say move on with an open mind you can do it, it is not the end of the world.

I'm not overbearing. I don't contact her very often. I have recently though since I'm being ignored.

And that is exactly the problem. Doing this for companionship leads you right to where you are now: over-involved with someone you shouldn't be, and who almost certainly does not share your feelings, even though you pay her to pretend she does.  The very fact that you've said you'll "go crazy" is another example of how you have totally lost perspective.  I'm afraid this "hobby" is not for you.

I don't "have feelings for her." I haven't fallen or anything like that. I just enjoy her time.

Please, do yourself a favor and just move on.

Relax - we've all been there, suck it up, decide or tell yourself it's just about the money - and next week you will find someone else that is your ATF

you will not go crazy - she's already done what she's done - you may make yourself crazy - again, that's you not her

you OVER DID something??? and spooked her - happens a lot... learn and move on!

.o2

ATF are sometimes sweet fleeting memories.  Remember the fun, and like another poster said, find yourself another girl.

In the hobby, both girls and clients come and go.

I sympathize with your feelings, but your posts show that you are over some edge.  A suggestion.  Wait 30 days.  See at least one other lady.  Then write your atf one more email thanking her for her companionship.  Do not ask or demand that she reply.  She won't, but that last email will both let her if she cooses to, and may give you some closure.

Most of all, calm down. See a therapist if you need to. stop  fixating on this ASAP.

Well said. There are many possible reasons she isn't responding. Don't scare her by being a stalker. In the mean time, book someone else or go the therapy route.

Maybe she sawvyour post yesterday about priding to her and she started ignoring you.

That should go well....I can see it now...so tell me whats wrong....well doc I have fallen for a hooker and she all of a sudden won't return my calls.....Doctor's reponse "get over it and move on you paid her to be with you."

yes,give yourself some space and clear your mind. I spent over 2 months caring for and supporting,a provider,that I thought was the "Bomb". Only to have her drop me like yesterday's trash. Yea,it really sucks,hurts the 'ol pride and feelings too. But,life goes on. You gotta pick yourself up and move on. I wish you well.

Thanks BoyToy4u some men forget that we have our own lives and we don't sit around with our hair and makeup ready, waiting for you to call us.

But I try to do my best and respond to all emails within the hour.

when you can't be with the one you love, love the one you're with..

I sent two e-mails to one lady to schedule a date with no response.. i sent two more to two different ladies and got two responses and have two dates scheduled...

Wait it out or move on.  Being ignored by a provider is really not something that you should take personally.  She isn't your GF, she is a total stranger that you pay to have sex with you.  Women do this by, essentially, leading a double life.  If she is retired or on a break she is most likely ignoring any attempt at contacting her escort persona.  You may hear from her again or you may not but, since you can't control the situation it's best not to worry too much about it.

I meant proposing.

-- Modified on 10/9/2011 1:02:01 AM

If she is not responding to appointment requests, then you may have to do that.  It may be that she really wants to turn the page, but it's also possible that she has other things going on that are precluding her from responding.  If that's the case, she will touch base with you eventually, and you can choose how to respond in turn.  In the meantime, you have done all you can do...the ball is in her court...

Not only do you have to bear the pain of losing a wonderful ATF, but now everyone and their brother-in-law is lining up to give you a sharp slap in the face, a la the scene in Airplane where a passenger starts to freak out when they learned that the pilot became ill and all the passengers lined up to slap (or do worse) them in the face to get them to snap out of it.

Ironically, this slapping might make you feel better by distracting the pain of the ATF loss.

I will not blame you for how you feel.  I've felt this several times over my 35 year career as a hobbyist, and here's another thing:  It never gets easier when it happens again.

It's one of the rarely mentioned side effects of the hobby.  You take the good with the bad.

I feel for you and I hope that:

1.  She does call you back and says she had to be incommunicado because of family emergency.

2.  You find a new ATF who will make you forget all about her.

I've had it go both ways, and they are both good.

Till then, all I can do is offer some sympathy and hope that helps.

(And yes, I know where you can find sympathy:  It's in the dictionary right between shit and syphilis. 8o)

Yes you are and you don't have to tell me twice I fully agree and will not argue that point.

Ladies in this profession must shy away from clients who appear to becoming too attached.  It is DANGEROUS to them on several levels.  
Now if you are emailing, it is possible that the communications are not getting through...  I sometimes have messages not returned & when we talk in person, I find the lady did not or I did not recieve them.   If you have used more than one contact method than it's unlikely that all have malfunctioned.
She may have resons pertaining to you or not...  but if she does not contact you, quit.  Continueing to attempt contact makes you look despirate & stalker like.  
Move on.
Early on, I tried going the ATF route...   service suffered, I was eventually taken for granted.  I moved on, found a few more Favorite ladies.  Eventually I did go back to see (former) ATF again (saw her yesterday in fact) but I now choose from 3 or 4 Favorite ladies.   The time in between helps me keep my head on straight.  
And face it, Ms ATF can not always be available...  having an alturnative is a good thing.  Once, (former ATF & I) had a planned meeting.   Typically I would call once I was out of city traffic, more than half way there.  This day I called before I left & she did not pick up.   I was POd but I selected someone else & had a good time.  I was embarassed at my anger, when found out later, (former ATF) was out of state for a death in her family.  

I do not have interest in notching my headboard (sixguns) as many times as possible.  But if I see someone who I think has the potential to be a Favorite, I meet her.  I suggest you do the same.
H

I find it easier with a civvie because she has to genuinely like me. I don't get being ignored by a provider because that is turning your back on money. I've always been nice so she isn't having to put up with a lot of crap for that money.

Don't worry, I'll let her loose in a short bit.   LOL


Seriously, ladies have a civvy life to live just like we do... no need to get uptight about it. She probably just taking some time off.

could be shes sick? do you know if she has a job outside of escorting? she could be very busy at work?
does she have kids?  or is she in college?  we all have "lives" outside of this profession..   .we don't all hang out on the yahoo im waiting for a date of ours to im us..

or there could be other reasons?  just wait and see ok?  if she dont call you or email you back.. you might want to find another provider?

IndianaProvider
not vip so dont pm me here
contact me thru my site