Today I saw a review of my ATF who I have been seeing for over 2 years now. In it the reviewer wrote that he got DFK, BBBJ and CIM on his first visit (there have been other reviews like that). Me..... I had to beg 2 years and pay extra for the BBBJ I got..... and still didn't get CIM. In those 2 years I saw her 3-4 times a month which included multiple hours and overnights... but still wasn't good enough. I know I should have ended it a long time ago.... but it got complicated. I thought we had become friends (yes, I know... I was an idiot). We used to hang out off the clock going out to eat and hit the clubs. Of course I paid for everything. Whenever she had a problem or needed money I was the one she called because she knew I was a horses ass.
   Today I sent her a text saying it was time for me  to move on, and she wrote back asking why. I told her about the review and she wrote back saying I was fucked up. So I texted back that all I ever was to her was a chauffeur and ATM.... her reply was that I was a wierdo. That's a far cry from the "I love you" she usually says. I feel relieved that it's over, but sorry it took so long to happen......

She saw you were ripe for the plucking and took advantage! There are several gals who have asked me to hangout with them off the clock, go to movies, eat, weekend travel, etc. I don't do it, because there's always that potential that it will come round and bite me in the ass.

Here are the top 5 reasons that made me end it.

Basically, she was being a hypocrite.

5. She didn't seem to respect my boundaries while expecting ME to respect hers. Also, she preferred not to do certain acts, so I respected that and avoided them to make her feel more comfortable around me, but she did such acts for everybody else. I try not to be pushy with people but eventually she became a little pushy.

4. She was telling her friends personal stuff about me, some that can be identifying that anyone with a search engine could find. I trusted her but her blabbering big mouth simply was difficult to keep shut.

3. She was habitually late more than 1 hour. Sometimes 2 hours late. Canceled on me at last minute more than 3 times.  I don't mind tardiness at all, shit happens, but she began to treat me as if my time was not valuable and never did anything much to make up for it. I guess it was my fault I never complained, being Mr.nice guy.  

2. I also paid her at her going rate while I knew she was giving discounts to a few other frequent clients. I never asked for it. Basically, continued to tolerate it because I liked her a lot as a human being and wanted to give her what she thought she's worth but eventually she treated me as if I was doing it because I am loaded with money... not because I was simply trying to go to extra lengths to tip her and show appreciation. Some appreciate it but some apparently get too used to it.

1. She was a very religious girl and began evangelizing her religion to me because she "cared deeply" about me and my soul.... and worst part was that she would not quit trying. It got to a point where it really annoyed me greatly. I think she did care a lot about me as a friend, hence the constant evangelism to save my soul, but I just couldn't put up with that shit on top of the other 4 reasons combined.

You may not be a weirdo, but you were a sucker.
See how fast you went from being her lover to yesterday's garbage?

Sorry, but some of you guys really get your heads up your asses.

At least now you can move on and bang a different pussy every week. That's what the hobby is all about

...because that is exactly how you are gonna feel once you realize what has actually happened here.

I too rid myself of a bad situation and what I thought at the time was a good provider and friend.

It wasn't good and neither was she.

Once I was completely free of the overbearing personality and the continual problems that arose due to the relentless drama caused within her wake, my life became so fucking good again that I soon realized just how truly happy I could be.

Best of luck to you !

The really messed thing is......

I was the one who drover her to the emergency room a few weeks ago...

I was the one who takes her kid to the mall and out to eat while she sees guys in her home...

I helped her last week to pack and move her things into storage when she got evicted...

I offered to let her and her kid stay with me rent free until they found something...

AND finally... I'm the one who watches her while she "works" sitting in the parking lot making sure things look
"ok"

So I guess I really am wierd and fucked up....

I have actually met a couple of providers who were quite religious (One got up early one Sunday AM to say that she was going to mass for an hour and would be right back.  When she did we had some incredible sex!)

None ever proslytized me however.  That would be too much.

As to the whole subject of breaking up with an ATF, my opinion is the less said the better.  It may seem like it's all her to you, but it may appear the other way to her.  There's little to gain by saying things to make a person feel bad about themselves, and the things you say could boomerang against you if she gets vengfull and starts spreading shit about you to her friends.

So, just let it be adios, and give no reasons other than "personal stuff", and let it go at that.

If she's any kind of an escort, she'll accept it.

I'm sorry to hear that bro and hope getting it off your chest will help you move on. Getting in too deep can be bad. I would have called her or met her face to face to discuss though.

As has been stated many times, they tell you what you want to hear as long as it's what they want you to hear.

Two years and extra pay for BBBJ? Sounds like she didn't like giving you that service, maybe you didn't shower before playtime? Maybe you're overweight? Providers can be sexually attracted to certain clients and not to others. The guys who got all those services on the first visit had something she found attractive, you not so much. She's calling you a weirdo and fucked up because that's exactly what she thought of you all along. The "I love you" was to keep you coming back for her financial gain, not because she liked you.

Hookers are users, they'll use you for free rides and nice gifts and anything else they can get out of you for as long as you're willing to be duped. The truth comes out only when you come to your senses.

But thanks for sharing your breakup story. If and when the time comes for me to break it off with any of my ATF's, I'll go about it in a completely different way. I'll just stop booking them and talking to them. It's a lot easier that way and they won't get the chance to tell me what they really think of me. I'm thinking there's a way to get out of an ATF situation without them winning. We've all been or are in this situation and it'd sure be nice if the providers didn't get the opportunity to insult us when we cut off their gravy train.

-- Modified on 7/4/2011 7:31:58 PM

Ditto that.  Some people are like a cancer which must be excised.  Fyi, that's what my atf(rob, bitch,cunt,etc) called me when I told her I wouldn't see her anymore. She only left with a few hundred, but what I was more pissed about was how much time I wasted on her. Congrats dude, you'll feel great in a bit.

The guys are being a little rough on you...  "tough love"...  but many of us have been there, as have I.  I had to take a long break from a Fav provider...  It was near a year before I circled back.  She thought I was gone for good.  She did take me for granted but had enough scrupples not to milk me & lead me on.  
In the meantime, I decided to rotate among Favorites...  serial meetings can be very powerful...  I am not inclined to notch my six-guns (or headboard) as many times as possible but do try out potential Favs when I spot a candidate.  

In reading your post...  I want to point out she did not deny!  She did not say "the review was wrong" or any such.  You were guilty of being a nice guy.  I was with my ex...  she used me for a doormat until the money ran out.  

I suggest you catch your breath...  then try devoloping a small group of Favs...   YOU choose who & when.

ALL of our power is in the decision of where (or in P4P with whom) to spend our money.Once you take the decision to pick a particular provider the balance of power shifts to HER.Therefore, spend wisely.

You can go to confession, wipe the slate clean, and go back to your nefarious ways knowing you can do it all over again next week.  Jews have their own version of it, but they just have Yom Kippur every year, which is much more time-efficient.

I always took a shower, brushed my teeth, shaved, and even wore new underwear before I would go see her. I wore jeans and t-shirts, but was spotless..... which is more then I can say about her who used a babywipe on herself between appointments. I know that for a fact because I spent days with her keeping an eye on her.


-- Modified on 7/5/2011 6:59:14 AM

You could have been an ATM and a chauffer to a Sugar Babe. Probably would have had better luck.

no, its a euphemism for a provider you have great sex with, and end up getting a little too close too, and then you start caring about the person you think you know because you forgot what she is, a hooker who knows how to hustle guys. you get blinders on. i was surprised when i fell for it, but these girls are good at getting what they want, be it financial, personal, emotional, etc.  thats why i have my own self imposed policy of never getting to know a provider personally again. i can have awesome sex with a lady by just sticking to the pretend time, i don't need/want to get to know them anymore then that, and so far it has been fantastic.  plus i don't have to listen to anymore sob stories.

Actually she's in her early 40's but posts her age 13 years younger then she really is. I know lots of personal info on her which she has told me. Like.... her real name, age, old and new addresses, her mom's and kids cell #'s, I was even her kids emergency contact at her school. I don't plan on using anything against her unless she goes after me first. And yes, she knows things about me too....

One word... PussyWhipped....

Dude... there are some providers I've met that I would certainly help out but you acted like this was a real girlfriend. And if a woman is your girlfriend... then you don't have to beg or even pay. Shit... anybody in the customer service business knows that you give some extras for repeat and loyal customers. She should have given you a VIP card.

There's a lot of candy out there and more on the way everyday.... If you were not getting what you wanted then you should have moved on long, long, long ago. Should have saved your money and bought a sweet house/car to attract the money whoring women out there that would have given you what you wanted for free.

3 to 4 times a month for two years? Wow! Fuck... let me set you up with my ex who gave a super mean BBBJ and swallowed. Just don't tell her how much you are paying me for the set-up.... LOL!

On another note... you certainly liked her for some reason. I'm hoping it was not because you could not find somebody else that would give you want you want.

C'est la vie .... move on. Yesterday's fave is tomorrows memory....

I am a newbie and I too had to pull the plug on what I was hoping to be a regular.
Your first 3 were done to me on the 3rd " date ". Glad I learn quickly !

Why are you hiding behind multiple aliases in posting all of this information??

Are you afraid that somebody might figure out who you are talking about?

Correct me If I'm wrong but TER was set up for men so we would not get ripped off. (Not saying you did get ripped off.) There are obviously some VERY beautiful women that help enhance the board (Much Appreciated!!!) but it sounds like your ATF is not one of them.

Calling you fucked up and a weirdo after buying her Mercedes??? Oh wait... never mind.... just crossed my mind that you are embarrassed by the whole situation and don't want people to know who you are.

That's cool... I can certainly respect that. Just move on and find a quality provider where you do not have to do the asking..... Find one that asks you what you want.

Cheers!

I want to thank everyone for writing, all the comments were appreciated! I needed the kick in the ass! I've learned my lesson which unfortunately took too long! Not sure if or when I might get back into it...

That maybe it's you? Sometimes they don't go that extra mile for certain bros because they find BO bad breath or some other turn off. For the most part this hobby is ymmv and there are things chicks do that are not even written in reviews that they offer that they do not want to offer to everyone. Other providers do offer things that they decide not to offer to particular guys for whatever reason.  Maybe I'm off base because  I have no idea who you are and the chick in question might be a total bitch the way you describe. Or, maybe not.

I know how you feel. Last November, after almost two years with my ATF, I finally realized that I was being used, played, taken advantage of, being a sucker, being a foolish older man- whatever you want to call it Actually I probably KNEW ALL ALONG that she was playing me, but I guess I needed to be needed and needed that phony attention and affection this 23 year old woman provided to a lonely 60 year old man. I cared for her as much as I did my older daughters and spent thousands of dollars on such things as rent payments when she was short;car payments, car insurance; her son's day care payments; multiple gas , food shopping, laundromat visits. When she had her auto insurance lapse and her license suspended for many traffic infractions, I also would take her to pick up her son at day care, take them both to lunch or dinner,take her to doctor appointments , take her grocery shopping, etc.
Because of her MANY traffic tickets in many different jurisdictions, I would go with her to the many courts and use some of my " connections " in these communities to get her fines and  tickets reduced  or wiped out.When her cell phone plan was shut off for non-payment ( she blamed the other two people on the plan with her for non-payment ), I bought her a new cell( $250 + ).

She was collecting unemployment for almost the entire time we were seeing each other as well as escorting. I was also seeing other escorts occasionally and in November I FINALLY HAD ENOUGH  OF THIS WHOLE ESCORT WORLD. I stopped seeing ALL escorts,and did take the time to tell 3 or 4 of my favorites that I was finished being used and taken advantage of, and played for a fool. All the others were understanding and wished me well in my choice and actually thanked me for being a part of their lives.
I needed to tell this woman face to face, and when I did her words to me were " If you felt that I was using you , why are you still here ? "Giving her up hurt for a while, but I got over it. Since that day,  I sent her an e-mail wishing her and her son a happy and healthy new year and another e-mail wishing her a happy birthday. Her only response was " Please stop e-mailing me.

I wish I had broken this relationship off a lot sooner. Escorting is a business. We pay for the woman to act and make believe that they actually like us and care a little bit.

I still  will  ocassionally  see an escort now, BUT I will NEVER put myself in this situation again.

I could tell you exactly what happened with this chick but at this point it doesn't matter...what does matter, is you got FUCKED! What you need is some Erin 101...you will able to sniff out a con from a mile away. I know you men love to be hero's but this is crossing a line. I know a guy who drove to hartford ct to get some tail...when he arrived the girl was waiting for him on the sidewalk like a gd street walker...she asked him for a ride to the post office so she could pay her electric bill before they terminated service...they arrived at the post office and she asked him to pay her up front so she could pay her bill...then she asked him to go to the cell phone store where she then talked him into getting her a new cell phone...then she wanted lunch and she ordered and extra meal for her child...then they went back to where he picked her up and she got out of the car and ran like forrest gump lol...there are cons everywhere in this business..you need to know who is genuine and who is a loser...just to make yourself feel a lil better, go get a box of baby wipes...take one out and let it dry...then write GO FUCK YOURSELF on it and put it back in the box and send it to her...yeah it is a lil childish but sometimes childish is fun lol

There were RED FLAGS everywhere and you missed them all . Don't get me wrong, I too am a " nice guy " - always have been ( probably ) always will be . But dude pick up your dignity when you get up off the floor !!!
Mine played some games on the 3rd meeting , I recognised them right away and she is GONE !!!
Grab your manhood when playing this game and life for that matter .
Bet your auto mechanic has a house in the Bahama's as well.
This board could have saved you untold $$$$. Live and learn - they all are like this to a degree , it's their job .

Congratulations on your total and complete lack of any self-esteem.  That in and of itself is not a crime.  But being a driver/scheduler/enabler for a hooker will make you part of the network of pimps/hookers.  

Thank your lucky stars this gal didn't get picked-up while you were around.  Otherwise you might be writing your tale of "Oh woe's me" from jail cell A.

Now go and spend some money on a life coach and find that bit of self-respect and get on with your life.

Dude- its like falling off a horse, just a lot more expensive. You've got to get back in the saddle again, so to speak, as soon as possible. Just my humble opinion...

you were just a sucker! I cant have any pity for you, you got what you deserved!