As a provider, if I know the member name of a client, I always search reviews he posted to get an idea of they like as well as the kinds of reviews posted. If I come across someone who has given consistant bad reviews, I check the providers other reviews. If they are all consistantly good with the exception of the guy who always gives the bad review, I usually choose not to see him. I feel like I would be just as good stepping in front of a train.
I have also contacted the ladies on several occassions to request a recommendation on clients who do not give me a reference, but have posted reviews.

My question here is for all.
Am I doing the right thing by reading his reviews and denying a date when necessary?

How do providers feel about a lady sending you an email to inquire if not specifically given the name by the client?

I am interested to hear your comments. Yes, I did use an alias so I cannot be B/C. Post here.
Thanks.

As a reviewer and hobbiest I would have to say you were well within your rights and probably smart to use all tools available to you.I know I would be treate better if you are comfortable and I have no reason to worry. As for the unsolicited inquiry , I would expect the other provider to use utmost discretion as in the case for married guys you never know when someone is out to out you. There is a lot less paranoia after the divorce is final.

A lot of providers know their client's alias anyways, mine do I have nothing to hide; just as long as some of my friends do not know it. There still may be others out there that you may see one day that give bad reviews and you do not know it. But you did what a lot don't do and use the resource of different handles to keep your main alias or handle a secret, great job.

when a gentleman is looking to spend some time with me, I do require his handle, to see how his reviews are done (tastely, I hope for the most part). I also do a cross reference check to see how everyone else rates the particular woman that he has submit to me as a reference. I just recently turned down a guy, who described one woman as looking like a rhinosaurus in his review of her. When he asked me why I refused to meet with him, I was very open and honest with my explaination to him. He accepted and moved on, as well as I did. I think that all providers should always listen to her gut instinct, screen thoroughly, and double check with all providers, before making a final decision to confirm a date. Reviews are out there for every VIP member to read, and that includes me, as a woman, as well as the man.

I would never give a referral to a provider unless the client has requested I do so and only via e-mail.

As for the reviews, I don't read them. Every provider and/or client brings something different to the table depending on whom they are with.

xoxo,
Marcella

"double check with all providers"

I'm sorry but I think checking with all providers without his request is out of line. That would mean giving his personal information and/or his user name to each and every one of them.

He may not have given that information to all of them and may not want them to have it.

xoxo,
Marcella

Reviews are a two-edged sword, and there's no reason that a provider shouldn't use them to check on the potential client... if she finds that someone consistantly posts bad reviews about providers who otherwise normally get good ones, it's certainly a red flag and you're within your rights to refuse service, although you might want to mention why and ask to hear his side of the story.

I see mostly pornstar providers, and when I met Kiki D'Aire a few months ago she told me that she had read all of my reviews so she knew exactly what I liked and what turned me on, then proceded to rock my world; I was very impressed, and obviously very satisfied with our get together, which prompted a very good review from me; so a provider checking on a potential clients previous experiences and reviews can be a valuable source for other information other than just checking on his general attitude toward escorts.

To be honest, I always have assumed you gals did that anyway.

Seems to me, as a provider, it's your body and you have a right to decide with whom and when you share it and take whatever steps you think you need to make that decision wisely.

Also, if we clients were more aware that you providers do share info, it might cause some of the less considerate clientele to dial the jerk-factor down a bit.

I do have a couple of minor, and I do mean minor,caveats:

1) It concerns me that acceptance/denial of the services of a particular provider might be affected by something I wrote in a review.   I've only got one review posted.  It was very complementary (very deservedly so, I might add).  I've been hesitating to write another review because my experience was significantly less satisfying than the typical experience described in her other reviews.  My sole reason for this hesitation is that I don't want to be seen as exactly the kind of potential train-wreck your talking about.  If I had more positive reviews posted, I'd be less concerned, but with only two it would be too 50/50, actually probably more like 60/40 against considering her typically very high marks.

2) I think it is a great idea to check out what a client seems to like so you can give the best experience possible.  This does assume that every time a fellow sees a provider he's looking for the same thing.  I'm not sure that this is true.  Sometimes one might want a soft, candle-lit; slow building, long finishing, cuddly, faux-romance sort of thing and another time be in the mood for a slammin, jammin, hair-pulling, nails-scratching, teeth-baring; wild animal; whip me - beat me - make me write bad checks; wheel him out on a gurney encounter.  

3) Getting opinions from other providers seems a generally good idea, but I can also think of a variety of reasons a provider might give a less than objective answer.  Fairness would seem to require examining  an individual provider's individual recommendation with the same grains of salt you describe for judging the veracity of a client's reviews.

Just my opinion - I'm more than likely wrong.

---

Boy, do I go one sometimes :-P

If he consistently writes negative reviews on well reviewed providers, than he's probably either shooting blanks,mad at the world,hates women, Al Queda or

All of the above.
It is your absolute right to deny him a date!

Cheers!Absolute...ly!


I'm on a roll...that's what ahppens when your bit by the flu bug...lol

I would never give a referell also. I would not bother a provider with her livelyhood so she can waste time contacting another provider; also my privacy is my own with whoever I decide to date. Furthermore, a referell will not stop a man if he is a Dr. Jeckell Mr. Hyde.

Nothing wrong with your use of the information here.

How would you know a person's TER handle though?  Especially a new client...

Makes sense to me. You're simply protecting your livelihood from someone who may endanger it unfairly. On the other hand, this reviewer may have run into a couple of providers who were having off days. Then, he patronized a provider when he was having a bad day. There's 3 bad reviews.
  On the other hand, there are some providers (as there are in any profession or craft) who richly desewrve to be drummed out of the business. I have toftt before. However, it is neither my favorite way to spend my time nor several hundred dollars of my money!!

Wondering what would constitute a bad review.
For instance try as I might when doing my best research I cannot find many "models" in this line of work. (Insert quote from our friend Cindy Spice if I was a model do you really think I'd be doing this?)  So if a girl gets all 10s and I come along and give an 8 or 9 did I give a bad review?  Somehow in our community we seem to associate nice time (6) as a bad review. What if the sessionwas just that "nice" nothing mindblowing. Everyone is human right?  Is a 6 a bad review?  For some ladies it is!!!  Heck I gave an 8 (on the woofwoof board back when they still had numbers) and got a phone call the next day.

Was wondering I am a part time hobbyist when i have extra funds.  If i was aprovider if someone consistantly gave bad reviews (overly critical) i probably would decline to see the client as it would seem that he was unsatisfyiable. Therefore why let myself down for a negative experoience---nobody needs that

I am sorry, but I will check with other providers that he had seen, that I do know. It's important to me to feel safe, comfortable, and I will be walking into a situation that will not be stressing me out here lol But, to each their own. I am not here to knock anyone's way of their safety zone. What I have stated in my earlier posts is how I have been doing this in this line of business for over 3 years : It's not for everyone

Also going back to the issue of asking other providers, which gives me more reason to do this:    I must say that in some cases, its best to get various responses from providers on that one particular client. Reasons: Yes one lady may have had a great time with him, but what about the other lady? One lady may say yes we had a great time! But, the other lady may say, he neglected to leave me my donation, and when I called him, he claims that he did, and that tells me there is something wrong with the situation here (very true story, which was a whole thread all over the OtheRbOarD, which everyone thought it was a shame, although the provider's reference said he was a saint!). I am sorry but, in order to avoid this type of scenerio, or any other type, in which it could affect me directly, yes I will continue using this as part of my screening.

-- Modified on 1/23/2004 4:49:22 PM

I had emailed a lady for a reference. Usually the response is short: yes, yes, yes.

This one decided to say something more, and as an fyi wanted me to be aware that nine out of 10 times he booked with her, he'd cancel, so she said you might want to double book, or, certainly not count on it.
That was very helpful.

I made doubly sure that we had good communication all along. Spoke to him even three times that day. Sure enough, he cancelled.

If hobbyists use reviews to check out a provider, there's every reason for the provider to check the hobbyists' reviews.  If the hobbyist is not willing to give his handle, then he's not willing to stand by his reviews.  If he's not willing to stand by his reviews, something's amuck.  

What's sauce for the goose...

fairly discreet.  However when I see the following statement made by waswondering and endorsed by Centrum Silver and Sedona my thinking has to change.
 
Waswondering said "I have also contacted the ladies on several occassions to request a recommendation on clients who do give me a reference, but have posted reviews".

Apparently she received responses from these providers without any authorization from the client.  The providers who answered her inquiries would not know whether their client had actually asked for a date or it was a provider trying to collect information on someone who had irritated her in a chatroom.  For that matter in many cases the providers who responded might not know whether they were responding to an SO or wife.  In addition in contacting these ladies at random she may have contacted providers who get jealous because they think the guy only sees them or is upset because she views it as lost money.  That is one of the reasons that guys who do provide references select them with care so as to try and avoid using as references any providers that tend to get jealous.

I know from personal experience that if a guy receives a (PM) or (email) information request about a provider whom he has seen that usually he is very cautious about what he says to the person making the inquiry and in some cases will not respond unless it is somebody that he knows.  I will not lower myself to this level but it appears that if we are going to be consistent with these ladies' idea of discretion we should tell the person everything we know and if the person we are talking to happens to be LE or a nut case it is that lady's problem not ours.

I have been around this hobby for a number of years and in general I always viewed the ladies as being more honest and straightforward than almost all of the people I have met in business.  After the last few years of the internet and TER I now start out viewing the ladies in general as being as honest as the former President of Enron.  

To those few ladies that I have actually given my handle and real name I am sorry that I have done so.

Like I said, I have been in the business for 3 years plus. IN ORDER FOR ME TO FEEL COMFORTABLE, going into a situation, then I come first and foremost. I compare it to you men back channeling with one another with another guy, WITHOUT my permission. I am sorry, but just because one lady says that you are the creme of the crop, doesn't mean it's neccessarily so. I do need other opinions: the good, bad, and ugly, for me to weigh my options, in agreeing to meet with you. . Just like I know first hand knowledge (from a client who came to see me at one given time), that many of the men do back channel with other men that I have seen, without my prior knowledge of it. Also, I know many ladies who deny, deny, deny, but  some do the same thing (yes some of us ladies do talk to one another), by asking about the certain client. Sorry but it's done by both parties, not just one.. No one is innocent here.

-- Modified on 1/25/2004 9:55:56 PM