I hadda client over the other night. I wasn't sure if he was even coming over cuz he'd cancelled out our first appt together. This was his second try and he was already 20 min. late. I called him and he was stumblin' around about being late, and I was like - it's now or never babe, cuz I don't trust you'll show up again. So he came over (he was 40 min. late; if I'd hadda 'nother client lined up after him, his time would have had to be drastically cut).

Anyway, he was in his 20s, good lookin', nice body, but he couldn't even hardly look me in the eyes. He kept up a running stream of talk, without eye contact and I thought maybe he was feeling edgy about blowing me off before and showing up late this time. But my view is, we're here - let's get present. So I worked him over orally for awhile, he seemed to enjoy that, but couldn't keep a hard-on when he was penetrating. I tried to go back to oral, but he just couldn't turn on again.

So I lay by him. I had picked a celtic CD that had a kinda country feel to it. Any of you ever hear that kinda country/ celtic before? It's very different. Has melancholy strains to it that makes you feel like you're remembering something, but you don't know what it is you forgot. Anyway, I was lying in the crook of his arm, and petting his face, and the music was playing, and he started crying. It was just tears down his face at first. I started kissing his tears and his face, and he just went deeper emotionally.

He stayed bundled up in my arms for a long time releasing, and when he was more cried out, I left him for about a half hour in the room to play with Noah (my tiger cat) and just cuddle in the covers. It was an amazing session. He was gonna stay for 45 min, but ended up hanging out for an hour and a half.

I think he went to such a deep place emotionally cuz I had just come back from a retreat in the desert where I'd let myself go to a lotta deep emotional levels. It was like there was a resonance for that kind of expression here. He apologized at first, of course, and I suggested that he not do a "male bashing" on himself for crying... that he didn't need an explanation for his feelings, for the depth of his feelings, that he didn't need a "story" around it. It was one of the most memorable sessions I've ever had!  xox Faye Desiree

physical healing but emotional healing as well for whatever burden that gent was carrying.  But I will be crying too if I can't keep a hard-on in the presence of a beautiful woman like Faye...  :P  LOL  Seriously though, sometimes we just need the companionship that only you ladies can provide.  What would we do without people like you, Faye?!!  A shrink can only provide psychological healing and not the physical part.  Then again, not all providers are as understanding and sensitive as others.  Thanks for sharing that!!  

Is awesome.

The art of touch is an inside job and you, Dear Lady, are a Master. Thank you for playing.

Thanks to the use of a new alias, I can share an embarrassing moment and keep what's left of my dignity intact.

I went to a massuese a couple years back that advertised "healing massage."  I was drawn to her by the picture in her ad, and one day was moved to dial the number.  When I got to her location she said she knew the moment I stood in her doorway that I was in big trouble (I was too, but thought I was fooling everybody).  After a one hour and 15 minute massage, she started talking me through some visual images and asked me to picture myself in these settings she described etc., some of them going back to my childhood (it's hard to explain exactly).  

She was very good at this technique and I allowed myself to be immersed into what she was describing to me.  Then without warning or even realizing what was going on, I just started crying.  First a little, then a lot, and I just laid on the table for 15 minutes as years of pain, loss and burdens come flooding out- the sources of which were long since buried or forgotten, but the scars remained.

It was an incredible experience and I think she saved me in more ways than she ever realized that day.  She had a special gift and it was far more than the words she spoke.  It was the energy she was putting into what she was doing, and the energy she was putting in to me.  I was drowning when I walked in her door and she saved me.  We kept in touch for a while and I had a few more massages, but never another experience like the one above.  I was a little embarassed too, which probably kept me from seeing her more.  

It did open my eyes, however, and made me have new respect for people who give of themselves to help others. Healers, empaths, and yes escorts too.  As Felicia once said, you never know who is walking through your door.  Sometimes it's a wounded soul or a broken heart and you are the only person at that place and time that can help him.  That may be why he was led to you in the first place.  The power of a healing touch or a physical connection can make all the difference in someone's life.  Let's face it, we men are at our worst when we've been wounded emotionally because we bury it rather than deal with it.  If it makes us strong on one level, then it most certainly makes us weak on another.  

I know most people won't really appreciate this story, I would have been one of them too.  But someday you may be where I was, and I hope at that time, you will be fortunate enough to find the person that can help you too.

-- Modified on 11/28/2001 5:59:09 PM

-- Modified on 11/28/2001 6:03:29 PM

You were kind to him.
You didnt have to be, but you were.

We all need to release... it's how we're made.  We're not allowed to do it though much in this country so our bodies, emotional bodies, etc. just gets over loaded with stashed energy... and it needs to be released or it'll cause disease.  Thank you for sharing your very intimate story Innocent!  How wonderful that you let go...  Faye