This ould be a good topic to post on The Erotic highway when Love Goddess returns. "til then, here's my take.

A big part of the mojo you mention is associated with neurochemicals, especially endorphins, dopamine, and oxytocin. In teh right combination, those neurochemicals make us feel the warm fuzzies, 'love', and that we want to engage in an activity over and over. When they begin to fade, the 'magical mojo' does too. You've got a couple of choices.

Start looking around for another ATF. There are bound to be other women with the capacity to stimulate the brain the same way your formeer ATF did. Now that you appear willing to invest more into relationships with providers, you'll probably find it easier to establish the kind of relationhsip you had with her. It kinda sucks when those heurochemicals stop churning as much, doesn't it? The drawback to this is that dopamine is also the neurotransmitter associated with the more severe addictions. Watch yourself.

The other choice is to talk with your current ATF about whether she is interested in doing a little work on the relationship. You may be surprised at her response. With a bit of work, the mojo can be restored. Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

Another possibility is a trip to New Orleans to obtain a little John The Conqueror root and a mojo hand. You're not the seventh son of a seventh son, are you? If so, you shouldn't need any of the above suggestions.

it makes the heart grow fonder.

I find that by spacing my visits with a select group of regulars over 6 to 8 weeks, and add a dash of new gals every few months, I end up with a very tasty stew.

Obviously my situation is different from yours. I crossed the line far further and far deeper than you did, and the feelings were reciprocal. The end was different and far more painful.

And there are many ladies who I have met over the years, and some who I have not, who have offered mental and emotional support. Thank you all ... you know who you are.

But your question: how to get the mojo back? I have no idea. Not that I want it back right now ... too soon, too painful. But I suppose someday I will, and then I will be asking the same questions.

Do a search for recent posts by me on the New York board and on this board. You will then understand ... probably more than you want to.


-- Modified on 8/29/2007 6:51:46 PM

Hyabby,

The loss you just had is something we can not expect you to get over completely....  EVER.

But I am sure many of us who know the story, and the story behind the story... want you to recover and bounce back. You cant move on, or pretend like nothing happened, (thats what the night job is for) but when you do get "your mojo back" miki will be winking at you from above and saying break a leg.

she is truly missed.

To Hyabby, and All those who were fortunate to know the Marvelous Miki,

It is 6:23am, PST and I have spent the better part of these early am hours discovering only now, what a beautiful, wise, and oh-so-cool lady that Miki was.  My journey began with your post Hyabby, and then on the NY board with the sad discovery of the mention of Miki's passing, to a post referring to Miki's blog in which your beautifully written and heartfelt tribute speaks volumes of the love you felt for her.

It was then I began to read each and every one of her blog entries...and I thank you, Miki, for sharing such personal and funny, thoughtful and naughty gifts from your heart, mind and body.
The idea you have to leave her blog up as a lasting rememberance to her captivating spirit to be shared by those who knew and loved her, but also to be discovered by the ones like me, who didn't have the gift of knowing her but will be able to feel her spirit, and her words, touched us, and I know I will remember her always.

~LeXi~

It's about finding the next great lady. I have had a few ATF's, lady's that I connected with far beyond the sex-and that always makes the sex better. Sooner or later they all move on because that is just what providers do. I still miss them all and remember them fondly. Sooner or later you get back into booking appointments with new ladies and some day, WHAM! you meet the next "someone special". Life, and hobbying, is a journey, not a destination.