WELCOME TO THE FIRST ANNUAL " SHE'S NOT WHAT YOU THINK CONTEST "

Some of you may remember back in December when I introduced the board to "The 15 Johns of XXXMAS " contest. Well its time to do it all over again !

This time however I solicited 14 different scrumptious ladies who frequent the General Board and asked them to send me a secret known only to themselves. The subject of their secrets will range from the serious to the sexual, the humiliating to fantasy but all are completely and unquestionably true. This I am certain because they told me so and I believe everything that I read.

Anyway, each day I will showcase a different Lady along with the list of 17 secrets, (I added a few extra fake secrets to make it interesting). Your job if you decide to play is to simply guess which secret belongs to which lady.
Its that simple... Yeah right !

At the end of each day the Showcased Lady will divulge her secret along with any explanation that she feels necessary. We will keep score on a daily basis and Crown The Winner at the end of the competition.

Good Luck to you all, your going to need it !

..............................................................................

Welcome to today's Scrumptious First Lady Natasha Lynne...
Now which one of these secrets could be yours ???

1) The night that I lost my virginity my boyfriends car ran out of gas and I
   had to help push it several blocks to the nearest gas station.

2) In a fit of anger during my divorce I used my ex-husbands gun and shot
   several holes into his speed boat.

3) In a moment lost in deep reflection I once walked out into the snow
   completely naked.

4) When I was 16 I did a football player on the kiddie horse outside of Kmart.
   It was one of those that you put quarters in. It was in broad daylight and
   I was dressed in my cheerleader outfit but I don't think any of the people
   coming and going right by us knew what we were doing.

5) When I was sixteen I was so horny that I used a summer squash out of my
   grandpa's garden to satisfy my uncontrollable sexual urge.

6) I once gave a guy a blow job for two tickets to a Yankees v Red Sox game at
   Fenway Park.

7) I once worked as a Bio-Chemical Engineer for a time until one day I
   realized just how much sex I was missing out on.

8) I was once pulled over going 115mph. It was in a state where most people
   are arrested and required to pay the fine immediately. I however was
   written up for 90 mph and sent on my way. I was young and dumb then.
   Today I would simply say, " When you're done writing me that ticket, how
   would you like the best Blow Job of your life?"

9) The first time that I experienced a warm, wet tongue on my butt was several
   years ago when I was living with my then boyfriend. I had just stepped out
   of the bathtub and was drying off. I bent over to wrap a towel around my
   wet hair when his Irish Setter helped himself to my exposed ass.

10) I was suspended from school during my sophomore year because I skipped
   class and got drunk with a friend then returned to school where I vomited
   in American History class.

11) On my graduation from High School I wanted to do it a bit differently so my
   girlfriends and I worn absolutely nothing but flip-flops under our
   commencement gowns.

12) During a swingers party event that I attended a M/F couple who had been
   eyeing me all night essentially kidnapped me to their room and molested me.

13) I have an extreme phobia of vomiting, roaches and revolving doors.

14) I didn't lose my virginity until I was sixteen but before I turned eighteen
   I had sex in my car countless times, a walking trail in the woods, a park
   bench in January, in a tent and the basement of a fast food restaurant.

15) I have an inner Goth Girl that only comes out to play when I'm not on a
   date. Torn jeans, strange graphic T-shirts and heavy dark make-up. This
   persona also includes Lolita type fashion, dressing in clothes that are
   little girl like, along the lines of Victorian Dolls.

16) My first MFM was with two seniors when I was a Freshman in HS. I f**ked in
   every single classroom, the faculty lounge and assembly hall at one point
   or another. I also gave a hand-job to a boy in Freshman health class during
   a movie on reproduction issues. It couldn't have been a very good HJ
   because he went on to be a Pastor.

17) Many years ago walking with a friend back to our homes, a man crept out of
   the wooded area and with open arms started to hug my girlfriend from
   behind. I took out my Taser and zapped him ! Never having used it before it
   was such a treat to finally have good cause because I couldn't have ever
   man-handled him.

 
   Unlike the gentlemen, these ladies aren't afraid to lay it all out there
   and another thing I noticed was that they tend to be a bit wordy. (smile)

   GOOD LUCK TO YOU ALL !!!

I would say  7) I once worked as a Bio-Chemical Engineer for a time until one day I realized just how much sex I was missing out on.

She is very intelligent lady and I wouldnt be surprised if she was a techie.  I could see her doing that.

Love the game but I suck literally.. I need a clue. Help a girl out...
Roadie. you are the king.. give up the goods!

,or a summer squash.

Now 4 and 5 stood out, so they are most likely the man made experiences,

but I'll go with #5.

That way we can fawn all over the girls more and more.

Maybe guess their favorite dish or Gucci bag?

Possibilities are endless.

Look I am clueless.  I met the lady but she didnt share her past life history.  Maybe I should have let her talk more.  But I am betting on her intellect and I remember her saying some where in a  post a long timeago about , damn I could be having sex.  So I went that way.  I believe she has a couple of degrees.  Of course if there was a choice for Rocket scientist I would have chose that one.

Well I do have some inside information.   She does not like chocolate cake and she does like Diet Pepsi.  Of course those things are not in the choices for this contest, so that info is useless in this venue.

but now that it's with the girls, it's not?  

WTF?  Why are so many of you so convinced that just because we are having fun there must be some great hooker conspiracy??

I did'nt see it's previous iteration but i doubt I would have gagged as much because the dynamic between payer and payee is different.

No conspiracy..just SOS on steroids.

What's next, hooker playing cards?

you say that, like you own them. lol

I am all for this christmas gift idea.  Dont talk her out of it.

Like Julia can be diamonds, Jessica hearts, I'll be spades and someone else.... maybe Gabbi or Toy .... could be clubs.  It could give a whole new meaning to strip poker!

Because I have no clue, and nobody guessed it. However, I did cheat a bit and read the blog on her website. Tried to glean her personality and background. And since I have not met her, did not have anything else to go with. But I did read a bit about her interests in school, and maybe this is why she loves history..?

Lets go for 52 ladies and spread it around lol. Wouldnt want anyone to feel slighted. Could give a whole new meaning to christmas spirit.  And free is a good price.

yes, the Price is Right...!

I have no clue. I like #1 so since I am clueless I will say #1.

sounds to me like you have a low tolerance for conversation you don't agree with

my post was to the man who started this thread..not you or your BFF.

I find the notion of playing jeapordy like guessing games about pros to be self emasculating..don't i have the right to express that point of view without being attacked?

if TER becomes a haven for only submissive dudes who deify women while paying for their adulation, you won't have to kick me, i'll leave.

-- Modified on 2/27/2012 12:55:38 PM

Now that would have ruined most ladies first time in a very stinky way.

I'd rather you stay

and play

-- Modified on 2/27/2012 9:17:12 AM

You don't have to chime in JUST to be negative.

You clearly picked an inappropriate screenname.

That so far ONE person has guessed correctly.

More info soon.

brneyeguy's logic may have been creative, but in the end, got him to the right answer:

10) I was suspended from school during my sophomore year because I skipped
  class and got drunk with a friend then returned to school where I vomited
  in American History class.

I have no explanation other than I was a stupid 16 year old with easy access to my parent's liquor cabinet.  

I have not drunk gin since, and even the smell of it makes me queasy.

I'm new to this game...but not new to summer squash.
Going with what I like
Though mine wasn't from Grandpa's garden but my ex's refrigerator in the morning after he left for work.  
Note to self...
Bring to room temperature before inserting!
lol

Bet that is the first time anyone has said that to you. rotfl

Now he is going to be all cockey and hard to live with lol.  Oh well. Congrates.

you're not compelled to comment either.

like i said, you don't seem to be tolerant of different points of view. Then you personalize it by commenting on my name?

I just happen to think it's a strange way to spend time, guessing lttle snippets of info about providers. I'll give you dollars to donuts some ladies are creeped out by it too. Who wants a client sitting around thinking about your idiocycracies all day long? They just don't want to get attacked.

That's funny, I was expelled from school at 16 for the same thing minus the vomit. My freind cleaned a bar after hours, came home drunk at 6 a.m. ready to sleep it off, and my dad made me go to school.

Damn it..i was gonna say 10...really was!!

one of them is me lol. I will go with the summer squash...wtf, how the hell did that fit?

lol  nah...I promise to be easy to live with. It was a WAG, and I do not even know natasha, other than what I read on her blog before I answered. I am sure the next one will be harder, except that at least one answer will now be eliminated.

By the way, I forgot to ask the most important question. What is my prize..? And hopefully it will not be a free hour with roadie..!