I've never understood the paranoia surrounding the screening process and personal information. Yes...there are SOME THINGS you should not share casually (and certainly not with someone who is apparently comfortable being on the "edgy" side of the law). I can't imagine what reason an escort would need my driver license number (though if they wanted to see it to verify my identity in person, that would be fine) or my social security number.

But my name? My name, as you point out, is common knowledge. There are literally THOUSANDS of people who know my name. My address? Ditto. Both? No secret...if you have EVER received an unsolicted peice of mail, your name and address are as common knowledge as that of George W. Bush.

No one in my life would believe any BS story that any escort could cook up to blackmail me, because they know me, and because edvindence of such actvitity doesn't exist (because it isn't true). No reputable company would ever terminate an employee on undocumented hersay from a total stranger...and if a person WERE terminated by a less than reputable company for these reasosn, then guess what? They wanted to get rid of your ass anyway, and just wanted an excuse.

The only LEGITIMATE fears in my mind are two fold

1) If you are a person in the public eye (elected offical, celebrity, etc.) whose reputation would be harmed by specualtion (versus even truth) regarding your activites with an escort

2) You are married, and the state of affairs in your home is such that your wife wouldn't believe a denial on your part. (Perhaps becaue you have been stupid enough to spend what should have been the morgatage money on an escort?)

In either case, frankly, I have never understood why such guys hobbied anyway. If *I* had geniune and justified concerns of losing something significant that I cared about do to elective actions on my part, I would elect to not go through with those actions. But that is just me...I am not judging.

Back to the central point though...I agree with you. There is too much paranoia surrounding this issue. Most escorts want nothing more than to simply know that you are who you say you are, and that you are not LE. Anything she could find out by just looking at your mailbox (not even opening your mail..) and / or from a phone book, there is no reason to be so secretive about. And insofar as where you work and what you do for a living, she just wants to know that it isn't for local law enforcement as an officer of the law or of the courts. Guess what? It ain't a national secret (unless it is, in which case you ALSO shouldn't be seeing an escort....lol)

-- Modified on 7/21/2002 2:20:49 PM

I was more concerned with the fact that you were giving a false impression of what the legal possibilities are regarding search warrants and LE. You were leading people to believe that LE could not use a ladies black book as cause for a warrant and that is not true.

All the ladies should screen and I would suugest that no one see a lady that doesn't screen. To be much safer you are better off only seeing well reviewed providers.

There are a number of very wacked individuals running around and some of them are in this business. Just try a reading the posts by the ladie of some of the truly disturbed people that try to see them. There have also been a number of ladies that have tried to blackmail clients, steal their identities and just cause a general nuisance to the clients and their families. 99% of the ladies are great people and not hassle. The reviews help weed out the true wack jobs but someone has to take a chance and be the first to see a lady and there in lies the hassle.

If you feel so confident that your life can not be harmed by giving out your personal information, then post it right here for all to see! Leave your full name, home address and phone number. I will gladly post that information to a number of different hack and phreak boards on the net. By the end of the week you will have signed up for more credit cards, purchased more items, have made more long distance calls and become the member of untold strange groups/affilitations than you can believe. It will take you at least a year to clear your credit and you will defintiely have to change for phone number by Monday. With a little effort, I could really ruin your life.

Most people are NOT trying to harm you and the ladies NEED to screen. Just be aware of the danger you are putting yourself in.

-- Modified on 7/23/2002 12:14:27 AM

First of all providers have a right to screen for their protection and clients have a right not to give out information they consider to be a problem.  Just move on to the next provider if you can't agree.  I am not trying to debate screening vs non screening but just want some of the risks to be clear that some would dismiss out of hand.  

The real problem is usually not the lady attempting to blackmail you but LE ending up with her black book or computer records.  Although a few providers may not keep records most do.  Otherwise you would never get the follow up e-mails, etc. from providers you have seen.

A few years back I had scheduled an appointment with a provider I had known for a long time.  When I drove over to her house I noticed a car in the driveway and just continued past.  I went to a local telephone booth and called her several times without an answer.  I just blew off the appointment.  It turns out the car was an LE undercover car.  She was busted and they waited a few minutes hoping I would show up.  They confiscated her black book with names, phone numbers dollar amounts, etc.  

As usual the cops had done a sloppy job and screwed up the bust but they did want to nail her even though she was only an independent working alone.  Apparently a neighbor had complained and for some reason vice was all hot and bothered about this case.  

Later that night I had a message on my home answering machine asking me to call Detective XXXX at this phone number.  The next day I got a call from Detective XXXX at my office and I pretended that I was just an employee and asked if there was any message.  The message he left was to have me "call Detective XXX as soon as possible because they had arrested Jane Doe for prostitution and my name and phone number was found in her black book.  I did eventually call him back and essentially told him to kiss off.  The last step would have to send me a subpeona for the trial.  Apparently vice called a number of her clients and if possible tried to pressure(blackmail) them into testifying against her.  If they could not find a way to pressure you into becoming a witness, they just tried to harass you.  I was fortunate because I work alone and have no SO at home.

Now let's assume that I am either married or have a SO and work for a company with a number of employee.  Let's assume I directly supervise 10 women and 5 men and worked with 7 other department heads of which 3 are women and 4 are men.  The phone call on the answering machine at home is picked up by my SO.  I have to come up with an explanation of what the police want.  The message I described at work is left with the receptionist.  You can bet that this news will travel fast.  Not even counting any men the 10 women that work for me will think I am some sort of pervert.  Ditto for the 3 women managers.  Especially if they think if they know my SO.  "Look at that bastard cheating on his wife with a cheap prostitute".  Of course my boss will hear about it.  More importantly the way these people view me will change and tend to make me less effective in the organization.  Some will not want to work with me or stay late working on projects.  Even if they will work late my boss will wonder if I am a sexual harrassment suit waiting to happen.  Eventually with my loss of effectiveness my boss will look for a reason to get rid of me.  After all it is easier to replace me than the rest of the people in the organization.  Depending upon how clubby the business, I may not be able to find a job anywhere in that field.

Now back to my SO.  The crap hits the fan all over again when she sees a subpeona for me to testify in court.  If I am a marketing expert maybe I can tell her that I was just practicing to be better for her.  Or maybe I can say she just gave be BJ's and those are not really sex.  HaHa!

I am not saying this sort of crap happens in every case.  I am just saying that it does not have to be Heidi Fleiss for it to happen.  Also if Charlie Sheen could not avoid getting sucked into Heidi's case with all the money he has for hiring legal talent where does that leave the rest of us.  

I am not using my usual handle for this post.  But the story is true.


-- Modified on 7/23/2002 4:08:54 AM

You're absolutely right. I don't think you can give or accept a reference that is more than a couple of months old, within mental recollection.

Use the hand-off method. Your first reference is given to a provider and the latest provider you've seen becomes your new reference and so on, verified by an email address or phone number. The first provider who offered a reference is the only one who had your personal information, which is now long forgotten.

And thank you ladies, for being open to providing references.
But, guys, remember to ask the provider if she will give you a reference. They don't want to be getting calls from strange women they don't know, and they may not remember you off the top of their head, unless you've let them know they'll be getting a call from a specific girl.

-- Modified on 7/21/2002 7:05:42 PM

"but if you were one women men... well we would be out of a job... ;)"

"but if you were one women men... well we would be out of a job... "

Very frank...very true...something every hobbyist should remember before he gets tramatized offer seeing someone besides his ATF...lol.

A very informative and intelligent post. I am making a mental note for next time I am in Seattle...I get there often (and MAN do, I like an intelligent woman...)   :^)