1. We can get laid anytime we want

      2. We never have to buy our own drinks at the bar

      3. We piss sitting down so its easier to pass out on the toilet when you're drunk

      4. We get out of speeding tickets by crying

      5. We get out of speeding tickets by showing a little cleavage or leg

      6. We can sleep our way to the top of the class

      7. We get to shop at Victoria's Secret

      8. We can marry rich and then not have to work

      9. We never have to pay when we go out on dates

     10. Men take us on all expense paid trips- all we have to do is sleep with them

     11. Men light our cigarettes for us

     12. Men hold the door open for us

     13. We pout better (those puppy dog eyes always work!)

     14. We're cuter

     15. We lie better

     16. We're better manipulators

     17. We always end up sleeping in the bed when we fight with our other halves- you guys get the couch

     18. We always have food in the fridge

     19. We don't worry about losing our hair

     20. We always get to choose the movie

     21. We dont have to mow the lawn

     22. We dont have to take out the garbage

     23. We dont have to paint the house or walls

     24. PMS- yet another excuse to bitch at men

     25. Cosmopolitan

     26. We can con our way out of anything - not just dig ourselves deeper into a hole

     27. Men unlock our side of the car first- a real bonus when its cold

     28. PMS is a legal defense for murder

     29. Men are like tiles, lay em right the first time ya can walk all over em forever

     30. We can masturbate more in a day than men

     31. 2 words- multi orgasmic

     32. We dont have to constantly adjust our genitals

     33. Sweat is sexy on us

     34. We never run out of excuses

     35. You guys may get to think about sex 200 times a day, but we could be having it that often

     36. Doggie style - that way we get to watch the game too

     37. We get expensive jewelery as gifts that we NEVER have to give back

     38. We get candy, flowers and jewelery all the time cuz men fuck up so often

     39. We can give "the look" that will make any man want to cower in the corner

     40. Women are cleaner

     41. Women have more than one erogenous zone (in case you guys didnt know)

     42. We're better arguers

     43. We dont always have to think with our genitals

     44. Massage!!!!

     45. We're better parents

     46. We never have to sit home alone on a weekend night

     47. There's never a shortage of ready, willing and able men

     48. We're flexible

     49. When women get pissed we dont destroy property or hurt people - we just take it out on the world in general because we can

     50. Menopause- thank god we're not capable of having children after we're 50

     51. Menstruation- just another excuse to use so we can say "no" to sex

     52. Men in uniform

     53. There is no penis envy

     54. We can just roll over and go to sleep after we masturbate because there's no messy clean-up

     55. It generally takes us less to get drunk

     56. We have a higher tolerance to pain

     57. We often get to cut in line

     58. Most women actually look good in short shorts- men DONT

     59. Better tips

     60. Women who dont wear underwear are considered sexy and wild, when men do it, its rather disgusting

     61. We have mastered civilized eating - we don't embarass our friends or make loud bodily noises in public

     62. Women can go a day without showering or shaving and not look or smell disgusting - thank god for long pants and perfume!

     63. We can connive men into doing our homework, writing our papers or carrying our books anytime we want

     64. We dont have excessive amounts of body hair

     65. We dont spend 45 minutes on the toilet

     66. Men will pay us for sex

     67. Smoking the seeds in marijuana doesnt make us sterile

     68. We can throw a punch at a man and not get hit in return

     69. Men may fantasize about having sex with more than one woman at a time, but we can have sex with an entire football team at once if we want

     70. Men walk on the side of the sidewalk closest to the road so that if a car hits us, he gets hurt not us

     71. Women sweat less

     72. Women smell better

     73. When women make their boyfriends mad, we don't have to waste money on flowers or cards - a blowjob and sex fixes all

     74. Men are more often serial killers, thieves, rapists and cheats

     75. Women dont get the humor in the three stooges

     76. Women have three accessible holes

     77. We don't get embarassed when buying tampons

     78. We're better gossips

     79. We have better fashion sense

     80. We're better shoppers

     81. We dont have to make fools out of ourselves to impress a man

     82. Our friends dont pick on us if we arent sleeping with anyone

     83. Men don't know what our 'girl talk' is all about (and I'm not gonna tell you)

     84. We're all sittin on a gold mine- we know it and use it to our extreme advantage

     85. We dont have to drive when on a date

     86. An ugly woman can use makeup and get a new hairdo to become presentable - ugly men are just fucked

     87. Women can use the old "that mark on my neck is from a curling iron burn" line

     88. Women know how fake it

     89. Women look better naked

     90. We know that rhythm doesnt only pertain to dancing

     91. When women are short, we're petite, when men are short, they're just short

     92. Women do less time for violent crime

     93. Women dont have to worry about not being able to get it up

     94. An oblong vegetable is all we need for a good time any night

     95. Women's conversations generally consist of more than just "uh huh, yep, ok, then bye"

     96. Women don't need an excuse to be in a bad mood

     97. Women never have to see combat

     98. The remote control is not an extension of ourselves

     99. Women are sexier

    100. We can get laid ANYTIME, ANYWHERE, ANY WAY we want it!

We're not treated like a woman.

Because we have 10 fingers and know how to use them, when he is not around


-- Modified on 11/25/2003 10:42:49 PM

I knew there were 101 reasons why it was great to be a woman.  Now I think of another, she gets the best from the thoughtful man whe he makes her O.

1.  We can pee standing up - Icky Gas Station restrooms are not a problem.
2.  A tree on the side of a highway makes a suitable urinal.
3.  Never a line at the bathroom (OK, maybe at halftime at the Stadium, or after a the movie gets out, but that's it.)
4.  We have unprotected sex and have a great time.  Women have unprotected sex and get a souvenir 9 months later after a really LOUSY 9 months.
5.  No Menopause
6.  (Not the way "I" feel, but I hear this a LOT)  Women get old, Men get more distinguished.
7.  Fat Guys can STILL get hot wives.  Well, at least on TV.  (King of Queens, According to Jim, etc.)
8.  A Bar filled with women exotic dancers every 10 miles or so in the burbs.  Ladies normally have to find a Chippendales in the big city only.
9.  Men only need three pairs of shoes (black wingtips, brown loafers, and a pair of sneakers).  Some make do with two.
10.  We can open the pickle jar by ourselves.
11.  We can open the ketchup bottle by ourselves.
12.  We can determine what is wrong with a car engine by mindmelding with the hood.
13.  We can actually get the VCR to stop blinking 12:00
14.  We can take a different route to the mall every time and never get lost, confusing our female companions (Where ARE we?)
15.  All gifts for our male friends can be found at Spencers or Best Buy.
16.  Our definition of bliss is a big screen TV with Satellite TV, a loaded beer fridge, and plenty of snacks.  Women's idea of bliss is finding a rich Prince Charming to allow them to quit working, while giving them a Black Centurion American Express Card, and Quarterly vacations around the globe.  Ours is just a BIT more attainable.
17.  Monthly Porn Subscriptions via Satellite
18.  We can watch Caddyshack on DVD 100 times and never get sick of it.  Women have to find a new chick flick to watch.
19.  If we go to New Orleans with a Hefty bag filled with cheap plastic necklaces, women will flash their breasts at us.
20.  If a Man sees someone he likes at a bar, he goes over and asks her to join him.  If a woman likes someone at a bar, she has to somehow send ESP signals to entice him to look her way.  Which of course he WON'T do, because he is checking out the hot chick at the end of the bar that EVERY other male is looking at.
21.  Watching Baywatch's girls run in slow motion counts as a deeply moving spritual experience for us.
22.  We make more money at work (OK, everyone except the ladies who normally read this site)
23.  Men don't shred each other's self esteem at restaurants when one leaves the table.
24.  Men are basically simple, and therefore, easier to please.
25.  Women are NUTS, and are seldom truly satisfied with anything they have.
26.  No monthly periods
27.  We can reach the top shelf in the supermarket.
28.  When we are nice, you like us.  When we are bastards, you can't get ENOUGH of us.
29.  Women get Bridal Showers, Men get Bachelor Parties.
30.  Women have Labor, Men have a cigar outside with their buddies, while bragging how THEY put "the stem on the apple".
31.  We actually can get the Tivo to record everything we want.
32.  Computers don't scare us, and we could probably hack NORAD if we had an inclination to do so.  Women can't seem to send an email to their girlfriend without it crashing on them.
33.  Men are ALWAYS horny and only need a place.  Women need to have a reason first.
34.  Men don't have to wear makeup.  Most of us don't know what "product" is.  Unless we watch Queer Eye.
35.  Men getthe hot rod 2 or 4 door sedan or coupe.  Women get the Minivan.
36.  Men have somehow found a way to avoid cleaning toilet bowls.
37.  All of our party needs can be satisfied at the FritoLay display at the local 7-11.
38.  After we have an orgasm, a blissful coma sets in.  Women toss and turn afterwards.
39.  SoftCore Porn ALWAYS available on MTV2 or VH1 as Britney, "Xtina", and Jessica each try to one up each other.  
40.  Victoria's Secret catalogs just SHOW UP in our mailbox.
41.  On Thanksgiving we watch football and eat.  You wind up shopping, cooking, cleaning, and stressing over whether the big honking bird will be cooked in time.
42.  We bond with our father in law with a beer and a golf game on TV.  You bond with your mother in law by being subjected to an inquisition where she describes everything you are doing wrong.
43.  We bond with our kids by playing video games and wrestling with them.  Women bond with them by arguing with them to do their homework, clean their rooms, brush their teeth, comb their hair, etc.
44.  When we take kids to the movies we feed them popcorn and skittles and they are little angels.  When you take them, they won't stop squirming, have to use the bathroom every ten minutes, and decide to talk constantly no matter how often you wag your finger at them or threaten them.
45.  Men have clothes that were actually designed to fit them.  Women have clothes designed by a sadist who puts dress size numbers seemingly at random.
46.  Men's shos actually last 6 months to a year of regular use.  Women's shoes last until the 15 day warranty s u and then the heel breaks.
47.  Men don't have to wear high heels (Unless they're Eddie Izzard)
48.  Men aren't afraid of spiders.  Women leap up on furniture and call 911.
49.  Men go to Home Depot and get materials for projects taht they can actually build.  Women try to figure out WHO they are going to blow to convince them to do it.

50.  We can actually find gorgeous, talented women who will encourage us to let them give us BBBJTC, DATY, CG, Mish, and Doggy, and also visit the Russian, Greek, and Asian isles.  All for a minor fee for their time alone.


OK, this is all tongue in cheek and meant for humorous purposes only.  Please do not flame me or take offense at the injustice of it all.  If we men have to accept the fact that we can't have a PSE 24/7, then everyone has to relax and get through life as best as they can as well.

Except once a month..

These were pretty good. I either couldn't relate; it was not true, or not applicable, these:
4,5,15,16,19,21,22,23,26,29,51

But it was fun reading! Thx.

Some that are listed, I didn't understand myself LOL I figure I would post it, to add some humor to the board

Signed,

Miss Pussy

But, at the same time, I thought how remarkably true some of them were, weren't they??

1. We can get laid anytime we want
Here at TER so can we.....

     2. We get to shop at Victoria's Secret
Honey, I'm reasonably sure Victoria Secret is for US!

     3. We can marry rich and then not have to work
Rich guys can marry hot chicks.... LOL

     4. Men take us on all expense paid trips- all we have
         to do is sleep with them.
We get to take hot women on trips and THEY SLEEP WITH US!!!!

     6. Men light our cigarettes for us
Not me Honey... matter of fact, you don't get that Breckenridge trip either...

     7. We don't have to mow the lawn & take out the garbage,
        paint the house or walls.
YOU'RE NOT MARRIED ARE YOU?

     8. PMS is a legal defense for murder.
It sure as hell ought to be!

     9. Doggie style - that way we get to watch the game too
Okay... you got me there... what's your phone number?!!?

    10. We're better parents
I don't think so....

46-100 um... My attention span was too short to go on...
   


-- Modified on 11/26/2003 9:45:56 AM

Men control the money.

Money controls everything. Money allows men to control the government and every other form of power within the corporate structure, whether it be in banking, legal, entertainment, technology, etc. Basically, men control every single aspect of your life (i.e., the clothes you buy, the car you drive, the food you eat, the medical care you receive....everything)

Women never have, and never will be, equal to men (at least not in your lifetime). Those in power will never allow it. The few gains women have made only came to be because these symbolic tokens were allowed by men.

This may make women feel hostile and angry and cause them to scream that it is terribly unfair. But you want to know what sweetie, life isn't fair. Whether it be fortunately or unfortunately the simple facts of life of the world are that men are the ones in control.

You may have 100 reasons why its great to be woman, but I'll live with the one reason why its better to be a man.

Just trying to face reality.

You Win!!!! Because of 1,2,31,66,84,100 I'm putting in to be a woman for my next life!!!

you don't get it, do you?

It's good to be a man when you are with a woman.... Looking after girls is too hard work... and to be honest I have no idea in hell what a woman REALLY thinks....

-- Modified on 11/26/2003 1:33:39 PM

THAT I LOVE YOU

(((,do you have your head up your ***?Like it or not,this is the way it is in 2003.Got it baby(eom

EOM

-- Modified on 11/26/2003 2:31:47 PM

While I do not agree with all the statements the original poster made about being a woman because some of the obsevations made about women are the reasons I have problems with women who are not strong.
    I also would ask you to look at both sides of things and realize that men have not been in charge throughout history. Modern history yes but, there is strong evidence that suggests that up until 10,000 years ago the civilized world was Matriartical.
    Personally, I wish that we lived in a society where all people where treated more equally no matter their race,color, sex or creed but, I highly doubt we will see that in this lifetime. I know that I"m keeping the faith that some day it will happen, cause you never know.  
    Here's a link to a book that may help to at least make you stop and think. I do not mean this as an attack against anyone just a little enlightenment.

Namaste,

Tiffany

because I know it would just feel very good

LOL
Its so hilarious ...
I read this whole entire post and the main reasons why its great to be a man.. ( propagated by the sticks themselves ) mainly revolves around a penis.


Yet who controls the fuggin penis boys?
Remind me again why you are here and where your money goes???
(ouch.. if I didnt know better that would be my leash on your sacks) shh shh shh now pet.. it will get better after we tie you up ! ! !

( jhawk jimbo thirsty rbear and a few others are exempt from my protagnistic southern sarcasm and steel magnolia tongue, as I wish to hire them for my personal concubines )
xo mo

Justaplayer, why do you post these two strong statements under an alias?

Men may control the money, but even Bill Gates needs to get laid.

Playas suck.

Now THERE'S the #1 reason to be a guy! When it comes right down to it, the best thing about being a guy is being loved by a woman (even if briefly!).

((, whomever you are, we love you too!

Why do you suppose they call it "the big bang theory"?

-- Modified on 11/27/2003 5:54:37 PM

The personal concubine idea sounds right up my alley!!!!

Re:(((,do you have your head up your ***?Like it or not,this is the way it is in 2003.Got it baby(

With an attitude like yours I'm sure your own finger is all you get up your ass dude!!

Re:(((,do you have your head up your ***?Like it or not,this is the way it is in 2003.Got it baby(

Besides, this started out as a joke didn't it???

wow and here I thought it was when fruedian misconceptions about sex and equality finally smacked together in the male ego center minds and created a bang loud enough to reverbate Oxford and hence they utilized it for the name when the meteor hit earth...


silly me


( wa ha
xo
mo

no problem.. had to save face after my mildly Dominate biatch side reared... I get so Feministically aka ma Ferguson at times... One would think I was doing Hillary.