& wat kind of tricks have ya tried to get a providers real name?

Don't know what the facination is. I never expect to be told a name, and if I am, know it might still not be real.  I used to have several friends who were dancers, had known them before they started dancing. They had stage names, then at least 2 names they told customers were their "real" names, in sequence, as the men gave them more money. I expect it is the same with providers.

Maybe it's just me but names don't mean much to me. They are things other people give you so there's no point in wasting time worrying about them. I've known people for a long time whose names I don't know. Sometimes it's people I bump into and chat,  sometimes it's someone who introduces themself and I focus on telling them my name that I forget theirs in the process,  sometimes it's a guest at a family function I've known for years and I know none of their names. I've learned a ladies real name here. Told her the mistake she'd made as subtly as I could so she could protect herself from others learning.

people being nosy by asking what a provider name is.
None of ya business!to the op did you screen these guys?Sounds like alot of weirdos and you said there was alot more.I have had a few guys ask my real name but not to the extent you described.

And more of a reality if you think you know the providers real name. It's never been necessary for me.  If an escort wants to tell me her real name, fine, if not it's no big deal.

But, I've had many providers give me their real name without my asking.  When a gal sees guys at her own apartment, you  know that he'll find out just by the name on the mailbox, or any number of ways when he is inside such as a piece of mail left laying around.

I had one gal tell me her "real" name once which I suppose was supposed to somehow entice me to see her more often for some reason.   It wasn't her real name however which I found out years later when she took a plane trip with me and then, of course, had to give me her real real name to get a ticket.  She was a bit embarrassed, but it didn't bother me at all.

No point in cluttering my brain , with  anything I have no  need to remember .
    From the same perspective , there is no need for her to know my name .

This version has a Borderline Personality Disorder and has mistaken GFE for the real thing.  Receiving a provider's real name is emblematic of having special status.  That's bad enough, but for some it also conveys power.  Power to out her and manipulate her.
I've never asked for a gal's name but some have told me anyway.  In most cases I've promptly forgotten them.

Wow!! That's creepy and sad at the same time. Isn't that the whole reason for this hobby? Anonymity? Ask for his real name and say ya wanna dig through his trash for clues. See how fast he runs. Some guys just are so delusional or have no real life that this fantasy is all they know. So they are always looking for a way to make the experience more real.  

My opinion?  
I will never comply with a request for relinquishment anonymity.  Giving someone your name, in this day and age with research internet capability, is the same thing as giving them your family, address, work, everything.  
There are plenty of quality providers who understand this and you can see without this ludicrous request.
Moreover, asking the provider for her real name is not necessary.

it makes no difference if i know her real name or not..if they are completely comfortable providing me with their real name..i am fine with it..needless to say it will never be used in any way to violate their trust in me..

I kinda felt slighted that she didn't tell me her real name.
I earned that type of trust.
Then one day. I found out by accident.
It was just sitting there to read...
I guess she let her guard down around me.

Depending where I am to meet the lady, I might ask for "First name only" on first  meeting. I could care less about the last name. And the reason I ask is the possibility of confrontation in a lobby, etc. for whatever reason. I would just say that I am visiting a friend I met in the bar last night. If asked what her name was and I said Skylersky, that might not be in the ledger, LOL. But if I said her name was Paula, for instance, and I was carrying a newspaper & a pizza box, or 2 coffees,  it would probably end with , " Have a nice day sir"!!! And I shall !!! ...............JUST SAYIN

fucking this really hot girl up against the mirrored door of the hotel room's storage space and saw her luggage tag with her name on it.
I mentioned it to her later.  She laughed and pointed out that was the name of the luggage manufacturer.

but both were FBSM gals.  One, I never knew her last name...  she's retired now.  The other gave me both...  she actually showed me her snail mail.  It's easier with a real first name I think & I use mine.  I feel a responsibility to my GF's to keep their information safe...  and I do.  Well, I have sent her small gifts from time to time...  
Guys don't need to know the real name.  It's a 'stage name' dummy!  I can think of no good reason why a guy would need that information.  It's not on your advertising.  If you reply to an ad, you use the name on the ad.  Yes, super creepy!  "WRONG NUMBER, CLICK!"  
Block the number & email.

I actually know the real (first) name of a few providers I've been with, but during the action I call them by their stage name. I enjoy the fantasy of her being someone else during the action, and then during the down time we can be ourselves and talk as friends would.

Not because I am so trustworthy, but because I am a drunk who most likely won't remember what they said by morning, not to mention the fact that I don't really give a fuck about their drama, so I am not really listening in the first place. lol

Actually, I know dozens, if not hundreds of "real names" it's just not really that big a deal to me, and the only reason I will ever be the one to do the asking is if I expect to be out in public with a lady I ask her "what do you prefer to be called" I would say 80% of the time, they tell me their real first name. Probably because I don't come off as creepy, nosy, or stalkerish.

I think many guys want to know a providers "real" name because they are creepy fuckers who deep down want to insinuate themselves into her "real" life, whether she wants him there or not, and I don't blame the gals for wanting to keep their private life private.

There's all sorts of problems that crop up here on TER and other places regarding providers. One provider in particular I know puts the blame on anyone who knows the truth about her in the subject at hand. If I don't know anything, then I'm not included in the potentially guilty parties. I just don't need that drama.

Are you saying that you traveled internationally with someone whose name you didn't know? Sorry, I draw the line there, when I travel with a lady, even if by car for several hours, you're damned right I am going to know her real name. The risks and potential reasons to need her real name far outweigh the privacy issues.

What if there is a medical emergency? How do you check into a hotel together? The list goes on and on, if the lady trusts me enough to go to another country with her, she damn well better trust me enough to give me her real name. I know for certain she is going to know both my real first and last name, because I am going to make certain of it. If we ever have to interact with the police or even hotel security, I am certainly not going to be calling her by her hooker name.

Why does having her "real" first name make that work?  And if they decide to check they might be able to find out who she is and evict her or have her busted.  Sounds like a bad idea to me.

This strikes me as being sort of analogous to magical lore - if you know the wizard's true name you have power over him. I can think of three occasions where this has intersected my hobbying experience:

if a lady tells me her real name (a handful have) in conversation, i file that under "stuff i don't need to know" and continue to address her under her stage name.

but that beats the shit out of just being "creepy"

I think the fact that I/you don't really give a fuck about a woman's "real" name makes her less concerned with it's importance too. My attitude is so "Unstalkerish" that if she thinks to herself "what is he really going to do with the information?" the answer is obvious, NOTHING.

I think some men just give off the vibe that they want to invade space and cross boundaries, I simply think that I don't give off that vibe, and that's why women don't have a problem confiding in me,

Maybe we are like the bartenders that are told EVERYTHING by complete strangers, it's not like we are going to do anything with the information, so they feel free to get shit off of their beautiful chests. lol

Every single ladies name could be Rose.

I had a provider tell me her "real" age four different times. She went from 27 to 30, to 33, to finally her real, real age of 35.

I know the last time was actually her real age as I took her to a doctors appointment and saw her age on her passport, as well as her real name, which I promptly forgot as it was one of those unpronounceable Thai name with about 25 letters in it. lol

I told her I really didn't care how old she was, she was still a very sexy 35 year old, and considering we started dating shortly thereafter, at 35 she was a little bit more "age appropriate" for me. although she had no problems at all passing for 27, actually I just checked her reviews and she is still listed as 21-25 and no one seems to be disappointed, I know I wasn't

"if the lady trusts me enough to go to another country with her, she damn well better trust me enough to give me her real name"

The same problem I often  have .
  I don't give a damn !
 The less I ask the more she  tells me .

That explanation doesn't make any sense.  

Agreed. I wouldn't take that risk either.

and by the same token I can't blame the guys with a lot to lose for NEVER trusting a hooker with his real name either.

I am not in the same boat as many of you, I respect other people's privacy issues, but they don't hold true for me. Also I don't do "references" I consider them an intrusion into the time of the lady/s that I am using as a reference, it also opens me up to the "why haven't you called me lately" type questions. I use P 411 and it that's not enough, I don't mind giving MY personal info, if that's what it takes to make a lady comfortable, If she still insists on references, we part ways amicably.

In those famous words "I will beg for pussy, and I will pay for pussy, but I will not beg to pay for pussy"

I would not ask a lady's legal name except if I were to travel with her.  I understand that the ladies need to protect themselves from the wack jobs in this business and I totally support that.  After all, you wouldn't be using stage names unless some hard earned experience was passed down through the generations.  I do know the legal names of some of the ladies I have visited, mainly learned them due to slips on their part.  When I learned the names accidentally, I let them know what they did wrong so that they could remediate the slip in the future.  Only one volunteered her name, and it wasn't because I asked.  In any case, I only use "stage names" with the ladies, even if I know their legal names.  

A provider once told me her real first name out of the blue after I'd seen her a few times.  Sweet and I suppose made the encounter more intimate but I was doing just fine not knowing.  Also like gambler I once saw a hotel bill in the hallway after an early morning appointment and left it right where it was, had zero interest in opening it.

The first time I ever posted an ad I had 2 lines on it and no name, when I met people, I introduced myself with my first name. The first time someone turned me on to TER because he said I should "legitimize" myself I found out you have to have a name on your post in order to be reviewed so I decided on Cosette.

I've seen it done. Guy gets so used to calling a provider by her real name that when he used her as a reference, he accidentally included her real name in the request to the new lady.

They are so much easier to stalk when you have their real name

Seriously, where it works for me is in an overnight situation.  Practically it just makes sense.  Of course if we are comfortable spending the night together, we generally have already been comfortable enough in sharing a few real life details including our names.

And I tell them they've crossed a boundary and to GTFO. I said NO.

If I'm seeing a lady for 1 hour, even if I see her 10 times for 1 hour each, I could care less about her real name, but if I am traveling with her, then I damn well know her real name and she knows mine!

...and it's no big deal (btw, this is another question which pops up every few months--doesn't anybody know how to use the "search" function?).  Anyway...

I've never tried tricking a provider into disclosing her real name.  Most frequently, I learn them because I do a lot of multi-day dates--and the girl affirmatively wants her real name on the room--or if I'm flying them in from out of town, and I'm paying the airfare--stuff like that.

One time, I referred one of my regs to a (legit--no "happy ending") massage therapist.  I didn't want to have to explain the relationship between myself and the provider to my massage therapist, so I asked my provider for her real first name--she gave me her full legal name, no sweat--we had been seeing each other long enough at that point that she knew I wasn't a creepo.

In general, if you repeat frequently with the same few providers, it becomes inevitable that you learn real names.  If the guy is just trying to "worm" the info out of the girl because he gets some sick jollies out of it--well, that's another story.  Clients like that should be dumped, pronto.

Personally, I don't want to know a provider's real name (unless I were traveling with her, as noted in posts above, in which case it would be essential).  

I have been going to stip clubs and seeing providers for over 30 years. I have never asked a stripper or provider for her real name. Some ladies I have known for years and have no clue as to their real name. I have no need to know, and if I did know, I would never use it for harmful reasons. The guys you mention in your OP sound like they are just assholes, and I'm sure some of them would use the info in harmful ways.

We don't always agree but you are spot on this time.

That said, it is not uncommon for me to end up on a 'real' first name basis with some of the providers I have seen.  I guess I appear to be pretty trustworthy, and I am, that providers end up sharing their real (first) name with me or other personal information.  If you are going to be that intimate, sometimes it feels more real to at least call each other by our real first names, but it is not important.

I had a destination date tha turned into a fiasco due to the lady screwing up with her real name. We arrive and I tell her that the host, a small and intimate facility, did not know her name. She introduces herself by using the first name of her favorite singer. The next day we are required to fill out a release form for the activities. She then introduces herself with a different name. Some people were calling her by one name, others by another. I knew her by her companion name which wasn't the same as the two names she was using. I didn't know what to call her the whole 4 days. I think the 2nd name was her real first name. A very uncomfortable situation. She is a highly respected lady that had a lapse of thought.  

That your question elicits a fake name (assuming these are girls you're meeting for the first time) so what does it matter anyway?  

In all cases when that happened, it was voluntary on her part.   She already knew mine, since I disclose that upfront    

Disagree.  A real name has the power to really harm a persons life. It's up to both parties to decide if they want to share. I don't know why it would be ESSENTIAL to know a persons real name when traveling. Maybe you make up a safer stage name for her ie. Marie smith vs Starry Lixxx  but really there is no reason you NEED to know a real name.  

In my three years in the biz I think I have only been asked that ONCE. I didn't answer and never would.

-- Modified on 1/4/2014 3:58:20 PM