Ladies,

If a client should ask to spend some extra time with  to enjoy a meal, drink or just quality conversation, ( off the books), would you be insulted or consider this completely unreasonable or more importantly disrespectful?  You have seen him on several occasions and have developed somewhat of a friendship...  
   
Thanks in advanc

I can answer your question from my own experience.  Providers will often reward regulars with OTC time to enjoy a meal before or after a session.  If your patronage is at least $2500-$3000/mo for a particular provider, I have always found them amenable to giving me a little "social" time OTC as a thank you for my continued business and loyalty.  If you're talking about someone you are not regular with at least once-a-week or more often, I think it is presumptuous to expect OTC time, because any less than the level I suggest does not make you an important part of them achieving their monthly financial goals.  If I'm off on this with respect to the ladies on this board, then they are welcome to correct me, but this has been my own experience based on hobbying for nearly nine years.  I would not even suggest going out with someone I was seeing less than once-a-week.

I always let the provider take the lead re OTC time. If she indicates through words or actions that she's ok with it, then I may suggest something, but never push it. For example, when I notice our time is almost up, I'll say something about its time for me to get going and get up to clean up etc.  If the provider says "don't worry about it" or words/actions to that effect, then I'll stay over the time a bit if my schedule allows. Another example is, I often book early morning meetings with my ATF and know she loves breakfast at a restaurant near her incall.  So I'll often ask her if she'd like to be treated to breakfast before our date, and if she has time she's all for it.  We've done a few lunches after a date also, when we both have time.

You don't have to be a high roller to get OTC time with the ladies. (Though I'm sure it helps) I spend nowhere near 2500-3000 a month in the entire hobby let alone on one gal. (Shit, I barely earn that much a month!) And I have never seen one gal once a week or more, but I have had lots of dinners, lunches, breakfasts, activities, and just hang out time with provider's OTC. It depends on the provider, the client, the relationship, the timing, etc.

father was sneaking  the presents around the house for us - his family - to find it  

I still do remember how naive were eyes of my mother when she was discovering or peace of jewelry or banknotes  between towels, or books.

Back then I did-  wonder  if she knew really that papa just hided it ?  

  But she  always was genuinely surprised.  

.. and .. and OOOO how happy was papa when he saw her surprised face .

 
( for us - kids - he was hiding chocolate in all un expectable places ..  

even when we were already adults and where out to colleges he still was spoiling us  
now plus to the chocolate he was buying high hill and jewelry .. oo my dear papa how much I love you  and looking for man as you for all my life..

-the first thing what i was doing  upon coming back home for the school break - i was searching house for hidden surprises .

.( we knew all possible places)  
then after examination  what he did prepare for us - i was returning surprises back to the place and was waiting for a family  dinner at evening .
We always dined out at one big table,  and we kids ( now adults ) - we were always allowed to drink wine  and Champagne which always was at home  for women and kids.  

 And then - after the dinner - when desert was served - he  was sending one of us  to some place

 - as to the bar - go , daughter and bring me a cigarette  - and there, next to his portsigar  would be a peace of jewelry.. or just a chocolate. OOOOOO we girls were soo happy !!!  

You should see my face when I was discovering or diamond earning or gold  necklace. Or just a box of chocolate( sometime searching the box for even more hidden surprises .. not always  it was there - soemtime just a chocolate ..

Too bad that our darling clients - those who do love make secret presents - those do not see an excitement when present is found..

I asked sometime - why you do that ?

His answer was - "my heart just is smiling when I know you found those 1000 extra in your pocket.  
Then I just imagining our next date - how hot would be kisses "

That is my type of men

Only one thing -  such men almost never need a porno performance  and even more -  
the do afraid those women who are porno stars and high volume sex workers.  

Those and only those I able to meet No matter if there be present to pocket or would not be ... I be still happy to share drink, conversation and what we may like - broadway play, opera, symphony or rock concert.  

As well as some sport activities  as skiing, biking and may be just together retire to the fitness room  

   

-- Modified on 12/4/2016 5:18:25 PM

It might lead him on and make him think you are attracted to him, and he don't need to compensate you for your time anymore. It's very risky.

It's not a professional thing to do in a business relationship

I had 2 favs that I  thought otc might work. Nope. Meter would be back on . Great wake up call to remind you what this is. Fantasy.

There's definitely some truth to that, but I also think a lady can profile a client and decide if it's "that client" who will start to expect/ask for play time for free. I've spent appreciable OTC time with a couple providers, one of them the on the clock and off the clock total time is probably about even because we've become pretty good friends. But anytime any clothes come off, I know I'm on the clock and I have no intention of pushing that, and I'm very conscious we're never going to have a romance or anything. LoL

The risk you mention is definitely there, but if the provider is very clear and maintains boundaries, and the hobbyist isn't an idiot, it can be mutually beneficial to spend a little time.

END OF MESSAGE

For instance, low volume, lower income girls are going to have a lower threshold for rewarding customers with OTC time. If a girl genuinely likes you, or has some kind of agenda, or may be setting you up as a mark for a scam, etc., can all have an impact in lowering the threshold. I know many LA single guys that get OTC time after only two sessions with immigrant providers trolling for that magic 3 year and 1 day marriage that gets them a green card.  

My experience is in the SoCal market with girls taking in $20-40k per month. So you can disagree, but I think we're probably both rught depending on what other factors are present.  Do two hours in one month with one of the TER providers of the month, or similarly-priced girls, then ask for OTC time for dinner and see what you get besides bemused laughter.  

Since I posted above, I have gotten 7 PM's from providers following the discussion that my assessment was about right.

I have spent a lot of OTC time with ladies.  I am happy to give a lady a ride somewhere (especially if they are visiting).  I am also happy to buy a meal, if for no other reason I like to have someone to talk with while eating.  I have also had many ladies buy me a meal.  I will happily pay for supper, but will never pay for the privilege.  If that is her policy, I support her 100%.   I also don't think I have ever asked a lady until I had seen her at least several times.    bigdell

I treat OTC time with a hooker as time spent with any woman who I am not paying for the privilege of spending time with her, I only want her to do so if she genuinely likes my company. I don't mind paying a woman for NSA BCD activities, but I don't want a woman to go out with me as a "reward" for how much money I spend on her.  I only want to spend that kind of time with her if she genuinely enjoys it and WANTS to spend time with me.

Personally I find it rather presumptuous to "expect" OTC time regardless of how much money you are spending on a woman. I've had OTC time immediately after a first session with a couple of women and I have not spent a single minute of OTC time with others that I have seen a dozen times or more for paid sessions.  

There are also different kinds of OTC time. Some OTC time leads to actual dating and sometimes even turns into a BF/GF relationship where money actually gets phased out of the equation all together, other times OTC time is simply time spent with a friend and the professional side of the relationship remains just that, professional.

My idea about OTC time is I do not want the girl to be thinking to herself about all the money she could be making during the time I we are together, and then starting to resent the time she is spending with me for "free" I don't want to "guilt" a woman into spending extra time with me just because I am a good customer, I don't need those kind of "friends"

I like to give that natural comforting feel... once paid time is over with I may even invite them for a drink or the movies and really just get to know my date. I like developing relationships with my new friends and I like keeping the ones that ive got with my established friends. I appreciate actual friendship and longevity..... I dont know I'm different though!

Personally, I don't think a good client should ever really ask that. It's not fair and no matter how you put it, you're putting her in a hard place to navigate from. Now, not only does she have to worry about your feelings, whether you're going to continue to see her if she says she's not interested, if you'll expect this in the future, etc…but it's all because you had to over complicate a good thing just because of your wanting to know if she'll hang out with you (or whatever your reasoning is) off the clock. Even if you say you wont be offended if she says no, the truth is, you will and it will effect how often you see her in the future. It's just how humans work.  

There's no way for her to say she isn't into it without it looking bad for her, so I think it should just be left alone. I mean, I wouldn't start asking my dentist to hang out with me even if I saw her a lot, just because I know that would put her in a tough position. Now if she asked me, sure maybe, but I would still be careful.  
The best advice I can give you is that if you like this girl and want to see her, spend time with her - pay for it. She's selling her time, whatever you want to to do with that time is up to you…don't ask her to give it to you for free because you're looking at it like you're only paying for BCD activities. This is her job, don't ask her to do things for you that are not what you originally contracted for just because you've seen her a few times. Like Gag said, you wouldn't want her to resent you because she could be doing more efficient things with the time she is spending with you for free (just to make sure you keep coming back to her as a client)…and trust me, even with someone you like spending time with, that will happen eventually.  

This hobby can be very easy and fulfilling if people stopped making it so complicated for themselves.
This scenario has happened to me time and time again, especially being low volume and highly geared toward making connections with my clients, and every time I see it coming, I just think, "why couldn't they just leave a good thing alone?". Not to be harsh, it doesn't mean my clients are only money, but it does mean that I shouldn't have to worry about being backed into a corner with these kinds of things because I'm doing such a good job that my clients really like me. If you really like her, show her by being a good client, not by asking for more

What I forgot to mention in my post above is that all OTC time I personally have spent was initiated by her. I never act like I expect it.

Just be yourself, be honest, maybe be vulnerable now and again. If she likes and appreciates you enough to want to enjoy your company OTC, she will suggest it.

after I've seen a Provider 2-3 times, either she or I suggest a dinner "before."  She's not doing multiple guys per day, so, it's simply a matter of dining together for fun/friendship - I'm not impacting her $income

Maybe I'm "different" - I see regulars vs. a bunch....

True story. I was very new in the hobby world and saw a woman who was just about my dream: blonde, petite, athletic former gymnast, sweet in public, voracious in bed. Our first session together was mindblowing. At the end, holding her, I said "I know better than to ask you to lunch now." She sort of nodded, I was getting ready to leave, she popped back into the bathroom, still naked and says "My lunch date cancelled. Lunch?"

I saw her regularly for almost 3 years and I used to tell her "You had me from lunch."

So, ladies, yes be careful with your time, surely. However, if you think there is chemistry, a little up front investment in generousity and kindness can go a long, long way.

END OF MESSAGE

and I bet you feel a lot better about it when it's your idea instead of a regular "expecting" it as a perk (freebie) for being a good customer.

Don't get me wrong I have a LOT of hooker buddies, some of whom I sleep with, others who are just "buds" with whom I have spent a lot of time with, but I don't consider the time spent with them as "OTC" time any more than I would having a drink with the guy that sells me insurance. They are simply friends who happen to sell sex for a living and I am absolutely positive none of them are seeing me as a "professional courtesy" as many of them are friends only and we either have never slept together or haven't done so for years.

I think hookers that LIKE to give OTC time should, and those who don't should NOT.  and I believe guys that think they DESERVE OTC time, do NOT.

The OP was addressing OTC time with a provider he has seen a few times, not one that has progressed to an outside relationship.  I have had many of those, too, and I agree with your assessment of how those develop and evolve sometimes into BF/GF.  Many situations that started out as a kind of reward evolved over time into a full-blown outside relationship, with not only OTC social time, but OTC sex as well, and that's great if it does, but no big deal if it doesn't.  However, if a girl I am seeing regularly and its strictly business between us suggests she would like to go out sometime for dinner after one of our sessions, I am not going to turn her down, nor worry about whether its a "reward" or some other agenda item of hers.  Likewise, if we are both hungry after a multi-hour session and I'm the one to suggest we go out, and she says yes, I'm not going to over-analyze the situation, I'm just going to enjoy it.  Most often, If I'M the one suggesting it, I will get a polite refusal because she has another client after me.  No harm, no foul when there's not available time to go OTC.

I'm sorry Estella but I have to totally disagree with you.  I have never held it against a lady because she didn't want to have a meal with me.  I have continued to visit many that said no.  bigdell

Well you sir, are a rarity. It's not that people mean to be offended, but they generally are. I think in most cases they probably subconsciously lose interest after that somewhat.

Nor is it only for regulars, I have had OTC time from women after the very first date. I remember one Thai girl who I saw for the first time on a Sunday who was rather new in town. After a very nice session we were making small talk and she asked me what I was doing for the rest of the day. I mentioned I was thinking about going to the Thai market to buy some seafood and she IMMEDIATELY asked "Can I come too?" That led to us spending the entire afternoon together, no more sex, just hanging  out and later eating at the nearby Thai Temple which has GREAT food on Sunday.

My point is, there is no minimum number of sessions before OTC time can happen, nor is there ANY point where OTC time can actually be expected.