A reoccurring scenario on the regionnal boards is as follows. A lady posts an advertisement with her rates. A guy makes a post commenting on the rates as being too high. Subsequent posters jump on the guy for complaining about the rates.

           My view is that respectful rate posts are not improper. Here is why – there is a difference between an ad mall and a discussion board. When a lady places an advertisement on a discussion board, she invites discussion on everything in her ad. If she wishes to advertise without comment, she can use an ad mall.

           Now let’s take a few of the softballs out of the equation. First, the ladies obviously do not like these kind of posts. But that’s not the question. The question is whether respectful rate posts fall within the bounds of fair commentary.

       Second, disrespectful rate posts –“You are not worth that much” are, of course, improper. But simply saying “that’s too high for me, or “that’s too high in the current economy” I think is fair comment.


What says the Board?

Why does every other industry and "producer" of goods and services have to deal with open scrutiny of price and value, but a sex-provider doesn't??

I have found over the years that if a girl is unfairly chastised for price-gouging that the gents will come to her defense and verbally duke it out to defend her honor... But if no one shows up to argue the post... Then perhaps she should examine her rate...

(BTW, we aren't "dating" these women... They WORK for us! And the message boards is a place where these things can be discussed openly, IMHO!)

-- Modified on 12/13/2008 1:24:45 PM

-- Modified on 12/13/2008 1:26:44 PM

I posted something on the San Diego board a few days ago regarding this as well, and I got no critical replies.

I am very interested to hear the guys SERIOUS input on this.

delete

-- Modified on 12/13/2008 1:25:38 PM

Far from me being a right wing conservative, but I think the free market takes care of these irregularities. If a professional (in any field)prices him/herself higher than his/her value, they will be out of work, because the customers will not pay for a service they view as not being compatible with its cost.
God, I'm beginning to sound like Rush.

A lady has the right to post her suggested donation and her limits.  A hobbyist has the right to complain about it.  A smarter lady has the right to PM said hobbyist with a lower price and wider menu.  Everybody is happy.  First lady is unsoiled, the hobbyist spews and the second lady makes rent.

Its a wonderful life.

I suspect there is nothing in the rules of service that say a comment about her rate isn't allowed, therefore it is "Fair",

...however what purpose does it serve other than to be taken by the original poster (the woman posting the price) as a negative comment?

If you want to advise her that the rate in question is significantly above the area norm, send he a PM or e-mail.  Doing it in public just causes her to lose face, with the general negative reaction.

But even so, I suspect MOST guys who post that kind of comment do indeed mean it as a slap.

If a Rolls Royce is out of my price range (which it is) I do not feel and purpose is served by walking into the show room and telling the sales rep thire cars are too expensive for me.  I pass by to the next dealer.

I see a few that will post different prices on different boards. I always check all the sites and tell them where I saw there ad. One told me earlier this year that she learned her lesson in raising her price to much. Yes the free market does take care of things.

if the goal is merely to insult, that is easy. But I do not consider it to be valuable.

if the goal is to raise a point about rates that do not reflect regional or temporal market conditions, that is valuable feedback, to be taken or ignored at the lady's pleasure

if the goal is to raise the possibility of a backchannel negotiation, this is between the lady and the gent who comments on her prices.

That being said, the best interests of the hobby community and the purpose of the regional boards are not served by driving providers away from posting ads by so heavily critiquing the content (price or otherwise) that the ladies are discouraged from posting....

imho completely tasteless.  If you can't afford it, then move on and find a lady where you can.

Over to the left there's a button that says "Search Reviews."  Use it.  Afterall, isn't that the reason why we are all here?

I don't openly question their rates because it just doesn't seem courteous. If someone else does, and the provider responds, we get a look into her attitude. I've seen too many providers jump to the same lame attacks time and again. I think they would be well advised to either choose their words carefully when defending their rates, or say nothing at all.

I completely agree. Better to say nothing and take the appoointment of the gent who has no issue paying her required fee. To my mind she has nothing to defend or even add to.

-- Modified on 12/14/2008 12:21:50 PM

because that's what you're really doing. Telling the whole board about YOUR wallet when you post "i cant afford those rates" on a ladies ad thread. No mater how 'tactful" or not so tactful you think you are doing it.

do you think anyone cares what you can and can not afford?

I guess a poster can do anything he wants about commenting on a provider's rates, but I don't see the point.  If it seems too high for the poster, he can simply not see the provider; but why would he want to tell us about it? In any case, if he feels it is important information to share, that is his right.

I think a lady's ad post should be hands-off as far as commenting on her rates.  They are only allowed one ad post per week and I've seen too many turn ugly over this issue. A woman has the right to charge whatever she wishes and we in turn have the right to see who we want and spend what we want.

Frankly I could care less what a guy can afford or not afford and the "not in this economy" line of criticism is just as irrelevant. The lady in question is trying to earn a living in the same economy that the rest of us are and she is entitled to whatever approach works for her.

You will make the provider as mad a hornets nest that you kicked. Nothing comes good out of it. They know when to adjust the prices accordingly. As I pointed out before look at all sites for the lowest price she has. If she complains just tell her that you saw her price at site X.

agreed. The problem with many of the posts of this type is its objective. It's hidden objective that is. Many times it's more of a scolding than a point of view. And the point of view behind it is quite often degrading. This isn't priceline where plane tickets or a cheap hotel is at stake, its Our time. It's what we value our time at. It is personal, so I can see why there may be a bit of problems with her reaction. As said before out of your price point, look elsewhere no need to heckle her in her post. It's tacky.

Gentlemen, if you post a comment in a negative or derogatory manner, it looks badly on you and we providers do take notice of who says what and how it's said.


-- Modified on 12/13/2008 9:05:50 PM

Several of the gentlemen who have replied to this thread were right in saying that the manner, tone or objective of the post makes a difference.

I felt I was attacked on the LA Board recently on not one but two threads by several gentlemen who saw it their responsibility to not only jump on me for my rates, but also challenge me to go ahead to "Just show up, post an ad and hope the phone starts ringing. "

The good guys defended me. But I was really shaken up and totally ill prepared for what I felt was a vicious and unrelentless attack.

http://www.theeroticreview.com/discussion_boards/viewmsg.asp?BoardID=1&SortBy=DateCreated%20desc&SearchType=1&Author=lotusling&DayFrom=30&DayTo=0&MessageID=212156&frmSearch=1

http://www.theeroticreview.com/discussion_boards/viewmsg.asp?BoardID=1&SortBy=DateCreated%20desc&SearchType=1&Author=lotusling&DayFrom=30&DayTo=0&MessageID=212173&frmSearch=1

how does someone that provides a private singular service suddenly have plural possession by a group ?

-- Modified on 12/14/2008 1:01:33 AM

I think a guy that doesn't respect a ladies' time is an asshole. Say yes or no, that's it. These ladies are here for a reason, and should be respected, and treated as such. Would you like to be told by your boss that they're going to pay you this because they think you're only worth this much? How long would it take any of us to tell our bosses to fuck themselves and walk? So, would any of us think we're above telling these ladies to talk themselves down from what they think their time is worth? I'm not above it. Yes or no is the answer. And respect will follow.

If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything. It might make this board a little boring, but this old saying does have it's place every now and then.

say so. If I think a rate is too high I don't book that provider. If a provider wants to talk about rates, it's a private issue between me and her.

You "provide" a good or service, and you "serve" that good or service at the pleasure of your "CUSTOMER"! While we do not "possess" you, we ARE the ones you will "SERVICE" if you are in this "BUSINESS"... Besides if we "OWNED" you, we would NOT pay you... So thank you for strengthening my statement!

How do you really put a price on service?!? You can't.. However, what I personally did was lower mine down just because I do realize the economic hardship that many people are going through...
And guys that say "you are not worth that much" should probably consider craigslist $99 special...
That is so disrespectful to women...

-V

Most posts, I read, from men questioning a provider's rates. sound like one of two things. They sound like they are complaining, thereby making a business issue (the nature of supply and demand) a personal issue, or in their attempts to couch their arguments in purely business terms, take a personal jab at the provider. That just seems to be the nature of the relationship and the boundaries between, or moments when it is business and when it is personal, for the guy and the provider is very blurred and dynamic. Much like yin and yang. Just when you experience one the other arrives in an ongoing cycle. To the guys who treat the relationship solely as a business, ask the next provider her true and honest opinion of your sexual prowess. If it is less than what you had wished for, try not to take it personally and withdraw having any further business with her.

Ya know Ben you do have a point. We are in the service industry and you gents can discuss our rates all you want. If it makes a couple of ASP's lower their rates or expand their services you have achieved your agenda. And why not? If the ladies that are being discussed don't like it they can make the choice of coming on here and getting slammed if they wish to disagree. They're big girls and I'm sure they realize that there is a distinct possibility of that happening. Those that choose not to tow the line can risk losing a couple of gents off this board but may pick up a couple who don't mind their rates...works both ways.

I made a post lower down stating that this board is really for the hobbyists and if the ladies wnat to play in your sandbox and get sand thrown in their faces every so often, then so be it. Really, if they want to avoid the sand in the face thing..don't come on here and it will leave this board fully for whom it was intended..the boys.

The most wonderful thing about this hoby. There are many women to accomodate many kinds of men. Some can afford the Lambo some can afford the Escalade and some can only afford to drive the pinto. It is all subjective. So leaving dirty comments are only reflective on how small you are emotionaly and maybe the guy shpould consider retirement from the hobby. As for the ladies . This is a biz you must have a thick skin. Because you can't please everyone. Even if you never meet...
Your price,your lokks, your age , your weight. will always be something somebody is going to compklain about. It is a sad truth. So ladies ...just keep your head up do your thing and be honest in your biz. And success will always come to you. Don't ever let somebody dictate your value. You set your price based on your needs and your retirement plan. Not on somebody degrading you.
hugs and kisses to everyone happy Holidays and play safe

Vanessa...having "you are not worth that much"  said could sting a little and you always in your nicest inside voice reply..."you're not worth seeing". I think those men love to try and lower a ladies worth no matter whether they are hobbying or civvie dating...not the type I'd ever see. And lowering rates can be a double edged sword. That's most likely the type of man that would try and see you....from what I have heard, lowering prices attracts a whole new and for the most part, unsavory demographic of men that makes the appointment much harder and riskier and not really worth the money. Just MHO.