The answer to your question is endless.  What works for some women doesn't work for others.  There's no recipe.  I realize this is the last thing you want to hear, but if you relax and enjoy the ride you'll have a better time.  

I've also noticed that some men are very intent on on bringing their partners to orgasm.  If you limit yourself to such a goal oriented approach you effectively limit the pleasure to be had.  You need to make her cum, and she needs to cum for things to be "right" in this situation.  It's a lot of baggage to deal with.  I say drop the stance and stay in the moment.

Clients never "cause" me to orgasm

Orgasms are not something that others give you, they are something which we allow... Or not.  When we are too tired or stressed or there may be psychological or health or hormonal reasons, sometimes it may not happen despite the best efforts of a friend to assist.  It's all good. It's even better when it's not a goal and driving focus to come as then we are free to REALLY and fully enjoy ourselves. Personal responsibility for my desire and response... It's fantastic to play in that space!

As a client...  who truely loves to please his partner...  I most often bring a lady to O by  DATY.  (So they tell me.)  As we lay there in the afterglow, one lady commented on how much she liked what I did...  but in truth, "I am the motor, you are the driver".  I allow her to move against me to get what she needs.
When I was younger (pre-weight gain) I could bring a lady to O in intercourse if we had the right fit so my P**** would rub her cervix gently.  (The first time I had that happen the lady was a civie RN who worked for Planned Parenthood.)  The position was what is currently called the CAT version of Missionary.  

I do NOT have the Ladie's O as my goal,  it pleases me to please her in however much she wants.  I find that they respond by wanting to please me.
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Sola is right, orgasms are not caused by the men we are with. To be honest, I don't have a lot of control over mine. Sometimes I do, sometimes I don't. When I don't, it doesn't mean I haven't enjoyed myself. At times I get really turned on but my body just doesn't cooperate. Conversely, I have occasionally had incidents where I was not that turned on but my body went through the physical motions of delivering a weak and unmemorable orgasm. I'm just happy I'm not a guy - you all have way too much responsibility when it comes to keeping this stuff under control!

"Make" a lady cum. The best you can hope for is to help. That's all any of us can do is help, and regardless of what we do, it won't always happen. The best you can do is to pay attention to the lady, ask her what feels good, do it, and pay attention. Even if she doesn't reach orgasm, that doesn't mean that what you're doing doesn't feel good.

Sex is about the journey.  Sex is about the experience.  Sex is about the enjoyment of two (or more) people.

I know it all sounds cliched, but I really believe this is true.

Orgasm is only 1 part of the overall equation.  If it's your ONLY goal, I think that you're missing out on other "pleasures."

Re: For the ladies only!

Don't understand where everyone gets my posting as all I want to do is cause a partner to "O". I love all forms of sex with my partners and only asked a question of the ladies. One of the most unforgetable evenings I've had ended with neither of us climating. We brought each other sooo close so many times and both enjoyed it.
Guys, the posting said" For the ladies only."

Too much playing on those places is sometimes a turn off!  I am blessed with multiple orgasms if the situation is right.  Whispers in my ear, hot and sexy kisses, gentle caresses along my spine and across my lower back, soft licks just below my breasts on my rib cage.  Those are the places to touch and tease to give me a mind blowing orgasm.  After one or two, then get between my legs to really drive me over the edge!

Truth be told, I have reached orgasm without touch.   The mind is the biggest sex organ of all!   It's attitude...mine and my partners.  Passion, passion, passion!