Hello. People  

  I'm an Chinese immigrants in the Midwest area. I start working as independent last year.  I really appreciated the TER discussion board. I come here to learn and grown to be a better provider.  

  I'm still new and trying to managing as much as possible in this business. However sometimes. I run into situation I don't know what to do.
   
I had a silly Friday last week.
     
   
    Silly Friday Case 1 :  

      A guy called  

   Guy:"Hey,M. Are you available ?  

   me :" Yes. What time you looking for ?  

   Guy:"Shoot, Sorry, I can't see you. Sorry for wasting your time"  

 
I was wondering :~@#$%&* WTF, Are you kidding me ? You called ask what is my availability then the next thing you going to tell me you can't make it , Why did you bother asked me in the first place ?  I don't know what's going on with people ,Why you called me ask to get together the next second you told me you can't make it sorry for wasting my time? why you dialed my number in the first place then ????

 
I called back trying to finger out what happened  but he didn't answer.  I called again he answered the phone and told me sorry for wasted my time . I asked him why, He said he did not need to tell me why ,then i asked him why he called the fist place then? He hung up.

I sounds very OCD .Lol .As a provider  I know I got ton of time waster caller and I have to get used to it .But in the other site ,I don't want missed out a potential client.  

I was beat up myself with this question why this caller so weird ,why he called in and back off in second?  

Because my voice is not sexy enough, Because this was he first time called a provider. He was nervous ?  

I want to be a mature person. At the moment as i sitting in my home. I felt i made a mistake. As a mature provider won't chase callers. As much as this guys sound jerk or weird ,but the minutes he back off I should let it go. If someone changed their mind. There is not much i can do. so just saying "Good-bye" and hang up the phone will be right thing to do.

 
As I'm still a baby in this career. There is some caller i just have zero knowledgment how to handle them. If you can have a word to me better handle caller like him . I'm much appreciated it.

 

Silly Friday Case 2:

 Friday evening. I was getting ready to go a date (Non-business related) .  

 I cough by a caller want to see me the in a short notice. I had that weird caller ( see case 1 )made me feel bad already  (I know i done nothing wrong ,but missed up my day )  I was in a bad mood. I told him I don't work short notice, I  work by appointment only, He asked me what is my next appointment of the evening.

 I should have told him " I'm not avai tonight. I'm going out with friend. Please contact an other time" but instead I let the bad mood got me. I hung up on him.

 I want make a confession. This is not what i normally behavior. I always treat people with kindness.  

 If i was politely told him I was not available , call back some other time . I might very likely get he's business in the feature. but I rudely hung up on him. I guess he would't call me again.  

 An hour late, I sent him a text message to apologized I had a bad day.  I know this is the best I can do whether he accept it or not.
 
   

When I know I've done something rude/not cool to a caller and the conversation is done. What will you think is wise movement to make ? Send a texting apologized to make it up or just move on don't cry on spilled milk?

 
 
Your words will help me build a strong and professional career  

 

 Many Thanks  

 
  Xie -Xie

As an Independent Escort you are going to get timewasters.  It is a numbers game.  Do not try to analyze them just move on and focus on the good clients

Chloe xx

(Do you mention that in your ads?) and when he heard your voice, he changed his mind about seeing you.  (idiot!)

I'm glad you offered an apology to the second caller, and that he calls you again.

 
As for these kinds of calls, they are a part of the business.   Don't let them get to you.  In time you'll develop a thicker skin regarding these things.

 
I'm glad you find these boards useful.

to make an appointment if the girl sounded Asian (what else is new?), but if she sounded fat, I would probably do what the first guy did.  Is that shallow?

That can be almost ANYTHING! I don't have a secretary to make my TER-related appointments for me. If it's during the day, I sometimes sneak out for some fresh air and use my phone. Very little is written down. I don't bring my calendar with me. Not so much anymore, but long ago I might have called someone to ask about an appt and then it hits me -- I forgot about the late project meeting this evening! or I promised I'd drive my colleague to the airport! or Crap! I have a conference call in my office in 5 minutes!! -- and that means, "Shoot! Sorry! I can't see you. ... Some other time maybe."  In other words, client stupidity.  Or nervousness. Or ... who knows?
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If he had said, "Because you sound Asian." what will you do? Say "I am taking English lessons to decrease my Chinese accent. Please call again in 2 or 3 years."?
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If he said, "I misdialed. I meant to call Marcia in Miami but scrolled past to McK by mistake. I'm not even in your city today! Sorry!" He's sorry for wasting your time. Maybe he'll call again some other time, when he is back in your city.
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"If someone changed their mind. There is not much i can do. so just saying "Good-bye" and hang up the phone will be right thing to do." Yes, that is usually the right thing to do. The GOOD thing is that the guy did not waste MORE of your time.  
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Yes, you should just let it go! Sui ta ba! 随它吧  
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EDIT: added info

-- Modified on 5/14/2018 10:31:14 AM

Thanks for the advice. Chloe

Thanks for replying .  
I’m a tall,  alethic asian . How can’t i forget mention that in my web and my photo clearly tells I’m asian ...

About the second client I apologize but he didn’t call me back  
What is the right thing to do In such occasions?

On mine.Dear . I Love you sense of humor. I don’t think the reason is that I’m asian .my pictures and my ad told anyone who looked it that already also I won’t think he is misdialed since he called my name.

But you were right about no one knows what’s going on in he’s biran and I should not guessing  

Yes let go and 随它吧。don’t let the OCD  coumsing  me . You don’t want come ? Bye @ end of the story

Probably your voice. People form visual judgements based on voice.  I am always surprised that radio announcers never look how I imagined them to look.  So you probably lost out due to his imagination of your looks rather than anything in concrete reality.

I have to say though, calling him back was a bad idea.   First it means you have time to waste. Second it is pointless as it'll only cause someone to be defensive.

By the way, I am in Minnesota and intend to visit you some time this summer. Of course you won't know it's me because alias... but ...

Thanks for reply . Buddy . If it’s my voice and I don’t know what I can  do . What is my voice is my voice.  

I shouldn’t calling him back ,  but I let ocd bite my ass lol ... I still learning  

I will opening my arms welcoming you . See you sometime.

Sales is a tough job, but you never want to needlessly harm a good lead. Anyone who has reached out to you is a better prospect than those who haven't. You want to take extra effort to convert them ... unless you are swamped with business, the you can be like the Soup Nazi and turn people away at whim.

You've paid, scrapped and clawed to get those leads, don't let them off the hook at the last second.

What should I do  do you have any advice to offer?  I’m all earned !

But if he didn’t like the voice sound of mine or whatever what u can do to convince him ?

Especially as a rather large Asian woman. Guys call Asian providers expecting a certain "type" and as you have alluded to several times you are NOT that "type".   Some guys can be gracious about things like this, but keep in mind a LOT of guys who patronize sex workers are not graced with adequate social skills, so they act like high school kids and simply hang up.

 
Look at it this way, wouldn't you prefer annoying calls like this over having some guy show up and accuse you of being trans?

 
Lastly, rudeness works both ways. Put yourself in the position of some poor black guy who acts respectful, passes screening, shows up freshly showered and shaved ready to have some fun only to be turned away at the door because of his skin color. Yes, people can be quite rude and hurtful, bad enough that even an asshole like me can feel bad about it.

Gaga. I love you. I have so much of respect for you on this board. I learned and keep learning form you. You are not an asshole. You are a master !  

Each time you replied  I learned something from you.  

My skin are too thin...too thin ! In this business I need my skin be a lot  and a lot of thicker. Some guys don't know how to react and no graced. what i can do ? Let it go and move on !  

calling back was a bad idea, Is got me nothing in return.

not to call me unless I know that they are calling me. Calling/texting randomly, not good.

Same thing to the clients , if they don’t know what they want , calling/texting to hooks randomly,not good

Probably nothing. My advice was general, as much as a potential client can infuriate you, it's always best public relations to remain pleasant. It's always possible they will reconsider.

I'm not saying spend an inordinate amount of time on them. But be graceful. Maybe you'll flip 1 out of 10 this way.  Well that's a few hundred bucks for being pleasant.

Try a different method of contact and learn how to manage and deal with that method.

If you are accepting phone calls it can be hard to move onto next inquiry if the last one left you feeling crappy, with the professionalism you want, to deal with new inquiries.

It is a learning game. You will experiment with different approaches and responses and none of them will be right 100% of the time. You must realize that a lot of inquiries will never turn into a meeting. Most won't and there is nothing you could have said or done to change that. Someone once told me "You have to shake 10 hands before you make one sale". He was a salesperson so that is why it is worded like that but the point is lots of inquiries will only amount to 1 or 2 visits in the end. (I hope I explained that properly)

If you read where girls post and talk you will find out you are not the only one who has this experience and, sometimes, the whole incident will have happened in another place on the other side of the world...and probably used the words and had the same reactions lol

You are not alone