as an afterthought i've read some of the other advice that suggests that "she's in love with you" or "she's playing you".
i recommend NOT trying to figure that out. in the civy world, i've been there, done that. it's an enormous waste of time and energy.
don't speculate! keep to what you know without trying to guess: communications have broken down. get yourself off the hook, or stay right there if you like.
but, the tension between the uncertainty of "she likes me" vs "she's playing me" is not healthy. it resembles a game best played only with daisies by children. in the P4P world entertaining that kind of tension is a very serious mistake. it leads to becoming roadkill.
I have been in the hobby only three years and have seen the same lady.After she went independent I still continued to see only her.We seemed to hit it off very well and she would sometimes give me a call just to ask me a question about this or that.She would bring me a little gift of some sort or another.In the summer if would be things from her garden;she even brought by home baked bread for my mother a time or two.Several months ago I asked her would she have a 3 way with me an another provider;she agreed.I lined up another girl and as the date approached I called and emailed the girl I had been seeing all along but got no response.I finally had to cancel on the new girl.I finally got a response back and she said she had been sick and was busy doing family things.I told her I understood that things happen and could I see her again solo.She fired back a rather mean email to me.I guess my question is,did I make her mad by trying to include another girl? If she did not want to do a 3 way why did she agree to it in the first place? I know this is not romance and it isn't love but I do care for her.Any suggestions? Should I send her flowers? Write an email telling her I still want to see her? Call and tell her personally? Forget about all together and find another provider? I'm sorry about the length of this post but I'm a little hurt and confused. AB
I am a little nicer in my delivery. Yes, she is one that either is in love with you, or she hates you now. Either way, see new women. Seriously, this is not good seeing the same one all the time. If you ask the question, you know the answer. And a couple of drinks is always a good thing
Sounds like you got totally infatuated with the first lady you met in the hobby. You need to get out and see that there are a lot of fine ladies out there who won't haul you thru the shit heap like this one. She agreed to the 3 way, then backed out...why do YOU feel guilty? You're allowed to be confused! No one can figure them out. You are NOT allowed to feel HURT! This isn't your GF, it's a P4P mirage of a GF! Now, get up off your ass, quit moping over a GF you never had, and make a call! NOT to her, to any of the other thousands of good providers out there.
Personally I would never e mail, call, write, anything. Stop all contact! If it bothers her she will get in touch one way or another. My bet is she NEVER will!
it isn't a provider issue per se but a people issue. some providers with superb companionship skills do not perceive things clearly and/or are unlikely to communicate clearly. when a provider does this i refer to it as "speaking in provider tense".
the syndrome is that some would rather trash the working relationship than speak clearly and directly to preserve it.i've been through that once or twice and it isn't pleasant but it is also not your responsibility to fix the situation.
there are plenty of ladies who will accept repeat custom and be completely capable of clearly negotiating a mutually comfortable working attangement.
forget about her. interview some candidates for a new favorite and find one with a functional communication style that suits, someone with some business ethics. a dysfunction like what you've mentioned is, well, dysfunctional.
if you take my suggestion and start the search... write a few reviews along the way too please.
as an afterthought i've read some of the other advice that suggests that "she's in love with you" or "she's playing you".
i recommend NOT trying to figure that out. in the civy world, i've been there, done that. it's an enormous waste of time and energy.
don't speculate! keep to what you know without trying to guess: communications have broken down. get yourself off the hook, or stay right there if you like.
but, the tension between the uncertainty of "she likes me" vs "she's playing me" is not healthy. it resembles a game best played only with daisies by children. in the P4P world entertaining that kind of tension is a very serious mistake. it leads to becoming roadkill.
this provider may have had stronger feelings for you than you originally thought. I could be wrong, but it seems plausible. Maybe her feelings are hurt.
OR...she is just upset that she might have to share you with someone else. Maybe she feels you might like the other girl better than her and she is going to lose you as a regular.
Either way...it sounds like you are going to have to get a little brown on your nose in order to please her.
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