A month ago, on a visit to the midwest, I saw a provider I'd been emailing with for some time.  We had a great time -- she spent the night, and then spent another night; I spent in four figures.

I invited her to come visit me for a long weekend in Miami and she accepted; of course, I'm compensating her very nicely for this four-day fling.  

When I checked air fares, I discovered that a direct flight from her city will set me back about $700, but she can take another airline and change planes in Atlanta, and it'll set me back about 250.  I got the lower-cost fare and sent her the details.

Now she's upset (I think that's the best word) that I didn't get her direct flights.  "It'll cost me almost a whole day to go each way instead of a couple of hours," she says.  Then she adds that it's "standard" for providers to get direct flights.  

What she seems to be saying is that if I'm throwing away a substantial four figure amount bringing her down here, I shouldn't mind a few hundred extra for the direct flight.  I was thinking I might save a few hundred and spend it on her.  

Who's right?  Anybody got experience with this type of situation?

Who's right?

...I think I would want to know how much the whole package was worth and more info on timings before decidng who to hang.

If it is a 10k package then I may agree with her. If it is 3k then that is tougher.

Why should the trip take all day instead of two hours? Is she expecting to be sitting in transfer for about 10 hours? The timings seem odd.

Still it looks like you may have spoiled things. I've flown three providers to me before. One internally in the UK and two from Frankfurt to London, all direct. All were happy to travel economy since the flights were all under two hours. They all could have squeezed a bit more out of me and insisted on business but none did. In fact one travelled at a slightly unsociable hour to save me about £50. She is a sweetheart and these little things count.

-- Modified on 5/19/2006 6:02:27 AM

...it is a different kind of date. Some flexibility on her part regarding travel may be reasonable, since it looks on the face of it like a highly profitable booking and relationship. But we need more info.

-- Modified on 5/19/2006 6:03:20 AM

Youre a paycheck to her, nothing more. Her response makes it even more evident.  Dont get caught up in the emotional attachment or her responses.  No money, and she's gone.  I'd say spend your money on someone closer.  This is not relationship building, no matter how much it may seem like it.  Its merely entertainment, nothing more.

I think you were wrong to book the flights without checking first with her that she was happy to spend hours hanging around an airport.  I can understand why she's upset.

It doesn't really matter how much you are spending, it's a work trip for her.  Even if she likes you and you get along great, it's work.

For the sake of only an extra $450 offer to book the direct flight and then she's be full of energy when she get's to you rather than worn out.  That's to your benefit as well as hers.

Sounds like attitude problem to me. These engagements do not come along ofter for her I am sure, and she should at least have some gratitude.

and how long are the layovers?

If it will take her many hours extra to travel by the booked flights, then I can see the point that the $450 you saved having the possibility of costing her far more than that in time away from her business, both in either appointments or the responsibilities (phone calls, emails, and other stuff) she has for her business.

I do know that some non-direct flights can take a person far out of their way (an example I recently saw: Las Vegas to Houston via Chicago) which can add a lot of time, then add to that a possible long layover, and she can lose two days which make her long weekend with you 5 or 6 days instead of 3 or 4...and for a net savings to you of $450...

I might add, whenever you have layovers or change planes, you have the potential for airline, or weather mishaps/fuck ups. On top of this, the Atlanta airport is usually a Hellish experience. Having your  teenage kids switch planes, and a layover to save a few bucks might fly, but it's a lead baloon with providers!!!  Your stock went WAY down in her eyes!  Sorry, but it's the truth.

Thanks for the input.  Some asked for more info.
Without divulging too many details, the "compensation" is below 5K and above 2K.  The direct flight would take 3.5 hours each way.  With the layover, the total time coming is 5 hours, total time returning is 6.  Hope this is helpful.

That's the deal of the month.

Send me her name!

...I'm stumped.

Now you mention the details I would certainly have paid direct. I hope things are not beyond repair.

From my experience the fact that the two of you have had this conflict, it is likely that the good feelings between you is gone forever. I suggest you tell her that either she comes with a big smile or she can stay home. You are the one that is offering her the opportunity to enjoy Florida with one client. if she does not see the value in that she should stay home and see how much business she can drum up.

A while ago I suggested that a lady who I had had 2 great experiences with could come with me on my next trip.

I found a direct flight for her, sent the details and asked her if she wanted me to buy the tix or send her the money. She asked me to Paypal it to her, then 2 days later she emails her flight details to me and she is taking connecting flights on both legs. I checked on the flights and discovered that she was saving almost half of the $800 I had sent her.

But this was her choice, on the other hand, instead of us arriving at pretty much the same time, she got in 4 hrs later & had to get her own cab from the airport instead of sharing one with me.

LeopardBoy

I have done something similar several times.  I usually look over the flight possibilities and relay this information to the provider.  I then let her select the flight arrangements that suit her schedule and preference.  A couple hundred dollars one way or the other is irrelavent in this instance, and she is happier with the schedule meaning we both have a better time.

If she is going to spend a day, an overnight, or perhaps longer with you, she deserves to be given equal say in the travel arrangements, and she deserves the easiest possible travel schedule.  Pony up the extra few dollars and keep her happy.  It'll benefit you too.

I admit that I don't enjoy hanging out in airports, but if I already know the guy and I'm flying into an airport that has great restaurants and shops, it wouldn't be so bad. I still hate hanging out at airports.  It makes me very tired . . . hint!

Hugs,
Ciara

...if the pennies are so important then don't risk the pounds.

How long will she have to sit around in Atlanta?  If she's complaining about an hour or two, I'd rethink the whole arrangement.  She's being petty.  Anyone who's ever stepped onto an airplane knows they are always delayed and that shit always happens.  the longest I've ever waited for a connecting domestic flight is about an hour.  If this is the case, she's being petty.  OTOH, if to be cheap, you've got her sitting in a strange, funky (yes, Atlanta is a rather funky airport) place for 4 or 5 hours then I can't say I'd blame her for being pissed.

I've been stranded overnight and again six hours in airports with connecting flights.  Perhaps she has had a similar experience traveling and will NOT do anything but direct.

4 days for under $5k is one hell of a bargain she has offered.  You shouldn't be penny pinching on ensuring that she is comfortable and happy when she arrives vs. jet lagged.

And that aside - essentially, on top of the favorable rate for such a trip, you are saving $450 at the expense of her 4 hours, and we know time is money.  How much would a lady normally charge for 4 hours?  More I'm sure.

Were her I'd be thinking... if he's cutting corners here, where else will he cut corners?  Dinner at Denny's?  Motel 6?
: P

You really should have communicated with her better before simply booking the flight, this could all have been avoided.

I hope it works out well and the time you share is fantastic!

I'd have gone for the direct -- no time to be pinching pennies when dollars are involved. I would, however, have had to pull my son out of college and sell him for medical experimentation to afford a $$$$ splurge. If I were you I'd call the whole thing off -- it's not off to a good start.

Damn fat fingers hit the post button with no message.

-- Modified on 5/19/2006 6:04:42 PM

Straight economics -- if she's worth $250/hr and you can get her there 2 hours earlier for $450, you are ahead $50. LOL

The odds of this being a fun 4 days are a million to one.

Talk to the lady in question and give her the flight info.  Let her help decide.  If she is willing to go for the cheaper flight, that's fine but I would tell her that she could go shopping with the extra money that you saved on the ticket.  Guys, woman love to shop with someone elses money.  QUESTION - Does Carrie of London ever travel to the USA?

Talk to the lady in question and give her the flight info.  Let her help decide.  If she is willing to go for the cheaper flight, that's fine but I would tell her that she could go shopping with the extra money that you saved on the ticket.  Guys, woman love to shop with someone elses money.  QUESTION - Does Carrie of London ever travel to the USA?

I am not sure what the "standard" might be since there is not "How to travel with your escort" book on the market. As well, she is there to accommodate you, not the other way around. If you would like the extra time with her, then go for the shorter flight.

For travel to clients, I usually handle my travel arrangements and add it into a price I quote him at the beginning.

4 days for under 5K You should pay for the direct flight because that is a great deal. My rate for 1 day is 5K.

The customer is often wrong!
Good customer service is looking for a win-win regardless.

He handled this poorly by not comminicating with her.  It doesn't sound like he is paying for her time to travel at all, just the days together, and therefore should have been considerate of her time.

You are right in saying there was a miscommunication, but as the provider, experience and business savvy should have lead her to be the one to make sure all terms of her trip were acceptable and laid out ahead of time. If she wanted things done a certain way, she should have done it herself or made that clear from the start.

When it comes to travel arrangements/accommodations everyone has their preferences. She cannot get upset because he booked a certain flight for her. She can ask for a direct flight, but getting mad and making him feel bad/guilty is what nagging wives/girlfriends do. Not VIP Escorts. And I am guess since she has gentleman flying her around the country she is a high quality escort.

Now as for the rate she is charging him for the 4 day trip, that is what she agreed to and she cannot expect other perks for giving him such a good rate.

Even in this business, where one would think the women yield the power, often girls are so submissive and passive, then get upset when guys don't tip or pay for direct flights. If you want something you have to ask for it directly or get it yourself...and that is true in life in general.

To me, good customer service is exceeding the expectations of a client and making his experience a special one that will motivate his return. And it seems as if she has done this already. But now with her semi-spoiled attitude and the tension between them, she may just lose a very valuable client. As well, now he is soured on traveling with escorts.

I wish I had clients flying me down to Miami. And if someone does want to fly me down, I figure out travel and hotel if necessary. The gentleman pays me a all-inclusive rate for my time and accommodations. He shouldn't have to worry about anything except what type of boxers make him look sexy. I want him to feel relaxed, and have first class service from start to end.

I think the provider should feel lucky she is getting an all expensed 4-day trip to Miami.  I am a provider as well and am experiencing the same thing, I am flying all day for a tirp to Houston from vegas, but it in turn will bring more money her way if you are able to save the extra 450.  
Typically, as a provider I typically fly direct also, but my situation happenes to be a short notice trip, so it is fine by me.

You happened to bring up a scenario where a lady should not just give into the wishes of a gentleman (if one can call a guy who pressures you into sexual acts you don't want to do a gentleman). And I admit I did approach this question with a strict business mind and did not consider such circumstances.

So let me be clear that women should not give in to everything a guy wants, rather they should speak up early and stick to what was said/agreed upon in the beginning. Make all wishes, terms, and limits known upfront. Then stand by them. And if you slack off and forget to say something then be ready later to feel uncomfortable when you have to address it mid-session. I will admit, saying "No" to certian fetishes, services, etc. is one of the trickiest parts of the business and requires a lot of finese, yet it comes with the territory. So when I cannot indulge a clients every fantasy, I refer him to someone who can.

You missed my point.

I have no problems agreeing that it doesn't sound like she handled this professionally.  I also think he handled this poorly.  

My point was that I get sick of hearing, "The customer is always right."  That's b.s.  Whomever came up with that philosophy should be put in the stockade.

like "Have a nice day", which usually means.."go f*ck yourself."

You say you had a great time with her and spent in the 4 figures with her.  Now, you've gone to scheduling a 4-day fling in Miami in which she'll be paid very nicely.  And she has the GALL to complain that she has a stopover in Atlanta!!!  Take her complaints as a gift.  Be thankful that she showed her true self ahead of time, before you spent the money.  Dump her!  Retract the offer.  You are the customer.  Her attitude cost her some big bucks.  Send her the message.  Who's right?  Come on!

-- Modified on 5/22/2006 12:45:19 PM