If I were really don e with this, yes, I would be serious... as long as I have a way to keep a roof over my head without being a mooch.
I've had sugar daddies before, but its just not my thing.
I agree with a lot of the replies here, but to sum it up in a nutshell... Every lady is different... civvie or provider. Just keep your eyes open and make sure you're not a sugar daddy... unless you want to be, of course
Had a relationship with a provider for four years. Then she retired and it continued for two years. Is that "working out" or is "working out" happily ever after?
I had marriages that lasted less time than that, and that were not as happy.
Relationships evolve and change, even after a divorce or breakup. If you still deal with the person, it is still a relationship. You don't have to have sex, or be in love. For a relationship to exist.
Aren't the two of us in a relationship right now? I don't expect this relationship/conversation, to go much further.
As to the general question, I know of several providers who are happily married to former clients. Does that mean its generally a good idea? No. Sustaining a marriage is tough enough in this day and age to add another complication to it. I know, as I've failed in the past. I doubt I'd ever marry again, but if I did it would likely be to a provider. I just like them.
Especially if this were a first time marriage for either party involved.
I also agree with the premise seasoned providers, and clients. Could make a relationship work better if both people have experience in this world. Both the Man and Woman, could weigh what the want out of the relationship, against what they expect to get from the relationship, and come to a realistic understanding of what their relationship is going to be.
Been seeing her about 3 years. Guess a little over a year ago she met a client she liked. She didn't start dating him until not to long ago. She is still working but making the transition to civie life. He asked her to be his gf so she said okay.
last night she was reading some of the emails he sent her trying to figure out what he meant by something and noticed that in the emails he has started to use her full given name. Not just her first name, but last name to in her provider email account.
She has been wigged out all day.
She said that when she brought this up to him, I guess pretty upset, she kept asking him why he would do that. Link the two parts of her life together. He turned around and started telling her about how she had done tons of things that needed his forgiveness and he had been able to forgive her. She asked him what things and he wouldn't tell her. He would only tell her about the great sacrifices he has made for her to show her how much he cares and that she has done all of these things that she wasn't even aware of that she should have seeked his forgiveness for.
All I know, and this is what I told her. She was stupid as shit to give any client her real name. He made sure to make sure that her working name and her real name are now associated with each other. She was stupid as shit to date a man who has only had relationships with hookers and he showed her exactly how he would act if anything serious was ever to come up, he will throw that shit in her face and made sure to have the grand daddy of them all to hold over her head, the two now linked.
There is a reason they don't allow for office romances, the shit doesn't work there and it sure the hell doesn't work here. The hooker is always the one to pay the highest price too if dating a former client, even after they've quit
Google is your friend, there are a some good things that of course I am not finding right now...
You need to be aware of her feelings. There are is ton of negative imagery and language around the terms commonly used for a companion. Sex workers are portrayed really poorly, subhuman in pop culture. So the next time you watch a show with her and something bad happens to a sex worker maybe give her hand a little squeeze. Let her know you love her, you understand it hurts to be portrayed that way even if it was her past and not her present.
Remember... NEVER use her past as a weapon, if you do god help you.
Just love her, listen to her, be honest and talk with her. Its going to be hard for you too sometimes, you are both going to need each other's support.
An ATF Provider I met 20 years ago I still see today. She's out of the Business now and lives out of state from me. Recently I drove to visit her for a few days. What amazes me is that she is just as Wonderful and Fun as the first time we met 20 years ago. We just remained Friends all this time. Before the end of the year I'm going to make another visit to see her.
but they (especially HE) must never throw her past at her. That is the poison pill.
Very many providers work their way through school... graduate with little debt... and move on with their life. Many providers work through some of life's down periods but are ready & willing to step out of that role for the right man.
I say you must go slow... and find the real TODAY gal & see if that's someone you can love.
If I were suddenly single (through some unlikely tragedy)... there are a couple of providers who I would consider LTR with.
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