Once when I was 15 I I used NAIR for lubrication while masterbating. I was out of lotion and vaseline, I have used sunscreen crisco grease, even dish soap....I like the sunscreen smells nice, it a good lube and just the smell of it makes me hard. So I was out of my usual lubes and looked under the bathroom sink and grabbed a bottle of NAIR. I saw the bottle of NAIR in my bathroom, it was my sister's, I thought it was lotion I didn't read the fucking bottle. My cock was on fire yall!!! I was stroking the cobra and withing minutes shit was burning the fuck out of me, I was like damn!! I jumped in the shower to wash that shit off and all my hair down there started washing off, I was like "oh noez!!" My cock was all red and shit the next day skin was pelling off it was all fucked up for like a week. Even my girlfriend was like "dang I aint touching the!" It was even to sore to jack off...I couldn't stand it, even my underwear hurt my dick.

Oooo, I hate when that happens.

Same thing happened to me with Icy-Hot.  "Icy to dull the pain.  Hot to burn the shit out of your cock."  These things should come with a warning for stupid teenagers.

....funny story but seriously when I feel the need I'm contacting a provider for a hot session, not warming up my Randy Johnson in the bullpen.

Good god! why did you just grab any old lotion like substance from under the sink!?

If all else fails use hair conditioner.