I rarely start a thread but I have been pondering this question for a long time, even pondering if I should even ask it here as it may be a sensitive topic for some, and get bashed in the process. So let me say upfront this in no way is intended to offend anyone but I am really curious to know.

Lately, I have had my fair share of members curious to see me but one they only will share their  desires when I am running a special, or two they are asking me if I would lower my rate.

When I would do some research I found a few things that they have in common.
1. They have seen ladies with rates far greater than mine, some double or triple in some cases and  would praise them even.
2. They are well known, or have a fair share of reviews.
3. They have never spoken to me in kind on the boards publicly, and I mean not at all.

Now I am starting to wonder if this is personal or not and if its an acceptable/appropriate practice to be both cold and interested in a young lady?
If its an acceptable practice to request a lower rate from me but have no problems paying higher ones to others?

Its starting to feel demeaning, and I have very good reviews not as many as some but hey I earned them and try to give every one a mind-blowing experience. I haven't been around as long as alot of ladies but I still bring into whatever I do my values, and good practices. Trying to build a solid reputation for providing a good moment for gentlemen and myself every single time. As well as being easy to talk to, positive, and helping out or contributing when I can on topics, always giving kind words, I may even PM you just to make you feel about a matter. I don't know, but the boards are seeming really cold and with so much going on, I just want to stay away and not open up at all.

Just my thoughts, what are yours?

Modified to include this:
I forgot to add what prompted this post in the first place. In particular because of this most hateful and ugly email that I received yesterday that was racially charged. Someone actually took the time out to of their life to be so evil, making an email address to be so evil, a girl or a guy I don't know, maybe a girl pretending to be a guy as a full name was included in the email, and attached as a name. I would not be so stupid to think that this person would actually want me to know who they are..so I know this was purposely intended and I received this email right after I made a post on my local board. I don't know who would be so evil in that nature but yea your purpose was achieved it, it did hurt me and still I responded to you in kind.


-- Modified on 3/9/2008 9:43:02 PM

If they tried to talk you down, they also did it with other providers, the more expensive ones. That kind of thing never appears in reviews (or shouldn't if the guy is an experienced reviewer).

There are definitely guys for whom haggling and low balling are almost part of the foreplay. Call it a fetish.

First off let me say that I worked my way up to my current rate structure so I can easily speak of your situation.  One thing to remember is that although those ladies they have seen in the past are now charging higher rates, it is indeed possible that they were at lower rate structure when the genteman initially saw them.  

I found that until I had two full pages of reviews many wanted a discount because I really was not a "known" companion.  This is the trial and error phase and while the gentlemen are getting to know you some might feel that if they ask, you might just say OK since you are new and trying to build your business.  Do not take this personally as it is just human nature to ask for a better price and not all do.  It happens at all levels trust me and is not a direct reflection on you.  I would see it as a compliment as they are showing interest rather than your phone not ringing at all.  

Work on making friends and participate on your boards.  Attend meet and greets and do whatever you can to get your name out there.  I toured a full year to get my first three pages of reviews and was treated generally very well because I have high self esteem and demand to be treated as such.

Know your own worth, gradually build your good clientelle and reputation at whatever price you set forth and you will succeed. You are quite new with very few reviews albeit great ones just smile very sweetly and say no I'm sorry my price is my price.  It just takes time and with a little due diligence, savvy marketing and great level of service you are bound to succeed.  Dream high and that is what you will get in return.

There is a great book you should read called "The Secret" which might help get your mind back on the positve thinking road.  It starts with you and will then flow into all other aspects of your life.

Just remember this is a business in which you forge casual relationships with clientele but don't expect this business or these gentlemen to give you life fullfilment as you have to give that to yourself.

Good luck to you!



-- Modified on 3/9/2008 8:42:39 PM

I don’t think it’s you personally, I think it’s the economy.  Every segment of the economy is being hit hard and escorting is no exception.  Every time the subject comes up on a local board some providers are quick to say they are busy and haven’t had to lower their rates and they are not feeling the economic pinch.  However, most of the posts on the local boards lately are providers advertising and most of those ads are for specials. I am afraid we are just experiencing the tip of the iceberg as far as the sub-prime crisis is concerned.  The crisis is a banking crisis and a banking crisis affects every sector of the economy.  The guys you researched might have paid full price a few months ago before the economy tanked but are more cost sensitive now.  It looks like it’s going to get a lot worse before it gets better so buckle up and hang on.  I wish you the best of luck.

-- Modified on 3/9/2008 8:41:03 PM

I promise you if the gentlemen that I have seen would write a review after seeing me I would have my two pages of reviews right now, maybe two and a half..lol.

I try to participate on the boards as much as I can. Initially when I first got on the boards, not one response would be given to me..then some really nice people reached out to me..some great ladies and gentlemen. I thought hey, well they aren't so cold and unfriendly after all. But now I am understanding that it is just a normal feel me out period. It is kind of a catch-22 as well because how will you get to know me, or see what I am about if you don't get to know me? lol
I can only reach out so much. I guess I will have to do more touring, and getting my pages of reviews as well as keep reaching out in hopes that they will get to know me, and see that I am a great person to meet and know.

Thanks though..great advice that I will surely keep in mind and do.

While this is an intimate business, it is not one where you can take things personally. You can have advertised rates at 1/2 or twice as much, and guys are still going to ask for a discount. How you choose to respond to haggling is your decision. How many people do you know that go to the Mercedes dealership and pay list price?

BTW: there are classy ways, and obnoxious ways, to say on your website that you do not negotiate rates.

Just because a guys is willing to pay more for another lady does not mean he is willing to pay that price to be with you. Try not to take it personally. She may be more of his type. She may have better reviews. She may have been offering a special (advertised or not) when he saw her. And, as another lady said: He may have seen her before her rates increased.

Regarding their board habits: Maybe they just are not good at chatting on the boards. There are a lot of lurkers out there.

Feel welcome to PM me if you have any questions.
Best wishes.

-- Modified on 3/9/2008 9:27:17 PM

It's not easy sometimes to wear my emotions on the inside and not feel its personal, because I do try to give as much if not more than I receive.

I am understanding alot more by your responses..and will continue to reach out.

after thinking about it, I said maybe it wasn't thoughts that should be shared..then I saw the responses and see that there are some who felt like I did.
I received a greater understanding just by your responses. I thank you all for responding so quickly and compassionately.
Again, I hope that this does not offend anyone my intent is not to do this..I hate the typing of words because they can be taken out of context so easily. So I will leave my post up and go to bed. Good night everyone.

in my experience, agreeing to see a guy for a lower rate was akin to agreeing to see a jackass.

trillions upon trillions of them out there.. dont even look twice at the ones not willing to meet your price because they will wear you down to nothing if you let them.

giving discounts or running specials is one thing.. thats something you give... not something that is demanded from you.

stay firm or they wont respect you.

keep in mind, its common practice to give discounts for favorable reviews, both indys and agencies.. .dont falll into this trap... .eventually ter will catch them and ban them... every industry has corruption and this one has more than most.. very rarely is what you see what you get.

keep your integrity intact, your rates firm, your clothes off and you'll do just fine.

I'm just taking a candid look at your site. A few things struck me; $600 for a first time visit, no cim in mouth and you're in Chicago. The economy in the mid-West is terrible and you would have a hard time getting this in NYC or LA. No wonder guys are trying to get discounts. Your 9-9 rating are outstanding and are very positive.

You're a very sexy and attractive lady.Keep trying. You'll do OK.

Rx

sometimes, these guys forget that we have feelings as well and we're not just hard women. I don't know what the email you're referring to says, but I am guessing it's bad enough to prompt this post and some hurt feelings.

As far as requests to lower rates, people will always try. There will also be the guys who say when you don't have anything going on, come to my house to chill out and continue to see their 140 girls as they try desperately to bargain a girl down even more.

I don't really have much experience with the requests for lower prices but I've had one or two requests from well known posters here. I politely decline, roll my eyes and go about my business.

I don't put a value on myself personally for this business- no one could pay me what I'm worth. However, I put a value on a block of time. If these men can't afford my time, they can move on.  What little time I have between school and other commitments is worth a specific amount to me that I don't ever discount and won't ever discount. I'd rather sit at home and do my homework if things don't pan out because I can always use extra time to study and do my homework. You don't get straight A's by sitting on your ass all day or by expending unneccessary energy on someone who doesn't equally value your time. I'm not everyone's flavor, but I think it comes across that I value my time and my space as much as I value meeting special gents.

Just my .02

Katie

Unless that was a mistaken typo but my rates surely aren't what you quoted sweetheart, although I wish they were..lol.
So if you meant to quote my actual rate of $400 instead, then I politely disagree but thank you all the same for the compliments and response.

Is the fact that you offer a lower rate for repeat business. Now please understand. I personally have never tried to negotiate a rate in over 20 years of hobbying. I never question a ladies rate and I don't think anyone should....but some guys do. Your offer of a repeat business discount is giving these guys an "in". Yes, men who are arrogant enough to ask for a discount will think that they are special and deserve the regular customer discount even on their first appointment.  I'm not saying it's a bad policy, in fact, I think it's a great policy! But it IS giving these guys the mistaken indication that they can try to negotiate.
You are doing nothing wrong here. Some guys simply have no class.

I have never bargained with a lady about her rates and can't imagine doing so.  If a provider's rate is beyond my budget. I simply move on.

I have just one suggestion for you.  You might want to consider offering a slightly deeper discount for extended hours to encourage potential clients to book that time and increase your revenue stream.  Just a thought.

Chi, as I read your post you seemed to be asking two questions.  First, does everyone want to negotiate rates?  Secondly, are my rates appropriate for my level of review ratings in the Chicago area?

I looked at the second question first.  I had TER list all Chicago providers (no TS) who had at least 3 reviews ranked by average and with good web sites.  I got a list of 681 Chicago providers.  You were ranked number 17 out of 681.  Of the 16 who had a higher average ranking than you did, 14 of them charge more than you do per hour.  Two of them charged less, but both of those were less by only $50.  Your rates for the combination of looks and performance appears in line for the Chicago area so that obviously is not the problem.

Everyone who has responded has given excellent advise.  I might only add that with your tremendous review numbers, you may be attracting a lot of guys who really can't afford your prices but find you very attractive and are just taking a chance on some "wishful thinking".  

The response referring to your discount for repeat clients also made sense.  You may want that to be just between you and the client when you are together.  You may find it has even greater impact that way.

As I said on one of your other posts, you have incredible numbers so you are obviously doing something right.  

Good luck and continued success.

Excellent advice Sara...there is really nothing I can think to add to that.
It is difficult to start a busines, any business and this one  for sure can be complicated. You need to try to remember it is so not personal. Self confidence is so inportant. Know yourself and you will be fine.
Could you tell me the name of the author of that book you spoke of. I love to read.

If you wish to offer a discount to repeat special clients, you can tell them so once you have seen them so the general population that sees your site does not know that. That may be a way to stop some of the price issues. Once you have spent time with them, all goes well and you both Enjoyed your time together you can tell them they may pay a lesser rate.

-- Modified on 3/10/2008 5:43:38 AM

There are so many many many women who provide... and they come in all varieties of race, color, creed, size and personality....  key word?  variety...  heck - I'll bet that if one would want, you could find a Jewish woman who wears a vale and burka.... and well you get the drift....

Myself... I have my partialities... but to be honest, mostly I look for clean ladies who take pride in their appearance...  

Why would someone take the time to bother you?  that is the question.  Because you are asking - I suspect that they feel that you would not lower your rate - for them!  and how dare you not!  I mean - after all - you get the opportunity to be "with them!"  or that is how they see it.

I see it differently - If I like your "style and appearance" I will call you to set up an appointment.... plain and simple.  You determine your availability - and price.  You also determine what you are comfortable doing....

Have I ever negotiated?  You bet.  But generally speaking this is for multihour... and with ladies I have been with before - where we BOTH know what we are in for.  Can you imagine the situation of a genuine insatiable satyr setting a 2-day rate with a provider... she thinking that there will be rest periods... and finding that what is expected is 48-hr of non-stop sex???   that is different from a 2 day adventure in NYC where you take in a show and dinner - with 8-10 hours of sleep in there... and a wee bit of personal time to shop - keep contacts etc.... (or in the case of an overnight with the Bizzare one... I have been told that I talk in my sleep!!! and kept her up with my wild tales of crime fighting... Bwahahahaha!!!!)

Negotiation is strictly (IMHO) for those who are going off the advertised time frames....  

As far as bargins... oddly enough I had one local ATF... and although she advertised "specials" I never took her up on them.... and always booked more than one hour.. however, she also always made sure that I was her last booking of the day, and I never was disappointed... (and she is missed) - HOWEVER, if I make an appointment with someone - and they state their price on the web - (and they are offering a special - I will take advantage of that)!

I cannot tell you that this is unique to you - it is not (white gals get this also).  I cannot tell you that it will stop (it won't).  I cannot tell you that this is limited to providing (it is not).

I can tell you that this is a recognized problem - see the link.

I can tell you that you should not let others set your price.... remember - the experience you provide is a combo of many factors... and you (and only you) set how you valued those factors... maybe you are 5 ft 2 in tall and weigh 600 lbs... with bad acne scaring on your face... but you offer a one of a kind sit on your face experience... who knows... but how you value that uniqueness - only you can determine...  (I know - you are NOT like that, but that was extreme to make the point).

I can also tell you that you should not let others create in you a sense of worthlessness... as this seems to be the case... the "ok, I cannot bargain with her, let me degrade her and then she will be forced to lower her price - cause I will tell her she ain't worth much and she will think that true!"  Don't let that happen.

You should also not live in fear.  And that one is hard to deal with - but you should.  

In summary, there are a lot of mean folks out there... funny - some believe that government should "force people to act right"  -- others believe that people basically "will act right as a natural inclination"  - me?  I believe that neither statement truly captures everyone .... and that evil exists... and exerts influence over people... maybe it is chemical inbalances in the brain - or whatever... but it is real and we all experience some of it...

good luck to you!

-- Modified on 3/10/2008 5:17:24 AM

There will always be someone who will try to talk you down in price.  Some of the reasons, when you don't take it personally, can be quite amusing.  I had a potential client last week who wanted a 2 hr initial appointment.  When he asked the rate, I told him to take the hour rate (keep in mind that my initial appts are 90 minutes) and multiply it by 2.  Well, he didn't like that the math didn't equal (Since I prefer an initial 90 minute appt, the rate is not 1.5 times the hour rate).  His comment - "I will be interested in the 90 minute appt.  I only pay the higher rate for model type, hard bodies.  No offense."  At first I was insulted.  Then I realized that it was on him.  Nowhere do I market myself as a hard body.  Hell, I wasn't a hard body before I had kids!  lol  As I told him, just because a person has a hard body, doesn't mean that she provides knee buckling, mind blowing sex.  Needless to say, he didn't get a 5 minute appt, much less 90.  

Takes all types to make the world go round.  Some just make it more difficult.

Kari~~

DELETED Double post

-- Modified on 3/10/2008 6:10:06 PM

-- Modified on 3/10/2008 7:03:15 PM

Chi, if YOU feel that your time is worth $$$$, then that's exactly what you should be getting for it. Don't let anyone tell you that it is worth less, expecially on first contact. The gentlemen who wrote your reviews were obviously pleased with the time they spent with you. Never compromise the value that you put on yourself.

As for the racially charged email, something like that is unacceptable, and there is never, ever a reason for it. You said that you respoded in kind, and that is perfect. A negative response is nearly always a loser.

I won't address the low-balling issue since you've gotten plenty of good feedback. But, I would like to say that I wish for you a special balm for those zingers that get in, inspite of your professional attitude and behavior. Perhaps a trip to the day spa or some such thing, or being with your special someone.

Personally I see this as a business.  People haggle it comes with the territory.  I haggled with my personal trainer and got him to lower his rates for me.  

Business is business, you can't take these things personally it will eat you alive inside.  

One of my favorites is "the ATM machine will only give me 300 cash" love that one!

-- Modified on 3/10/2008 3:07:36 PM

Kari,
Having seen you many times, the guy in question doesn't know what he missed!

I am surprised to learn that pointing out a lady's perceived imperfections is not the best way to get her into a great mood. That is one where she's willing to listen to any and all offers, even lowballs, just to show her appreciation to a gentleman for providing key steps for her self-improvement! LOL

But seriously, since you seem to have a vacant 90 min. slot available, when can I see you again!



-- Modified on 3/10/2008 10:23:06 AM

I have met a great few gents off the boards, who not only did not try to low ball me, but wanted multiple hours right from our initial contact, and at least 1 or 2, I think I have to check again, has written a review for me about their experience. BTW, I have spoken with some very wonderful ladies, who have reached out to me as well. I can not thank those enough who have.

The ones that I am speaking on are the exceptions. They may have contacted me regarding only a special, and then that has never fell through. Or in a couple of cases have asked for a discount, or said something to the affect of my rates from their first correspondence with me that indicated they have not paid my rate to some ladies, and that I should lower them to fit their current status, so that we could meet.

Let me also say about the Return Clients rates, after giving it some thought, I just decided this week and added that to my rates page. Maybe I should have not done that because it was more an emotional responses, then a rational one. I gave in to as some have said, the ones with no class or who do not appreciate what I have to offer to them.

Yep, I beat myself up about it, and the email did not help. It even shows in the words on my website, when I say that some have tried to discourage my existence but I say to them if you don't reach for the stars, you will surely end up in the dirt, that was a personal testament. Just could not understand why a person would go out of their way to be so cruel, so I gave in. Caved in, and added a return clients rate. After that, I posted my weekly ad (I hardly ever do this either) to give some updates on what I have been up too, and told the world that I understand we are going through some times, here is how I want to help. Next, came the email after coming back home from a hot 3hr. appointment with a gentlemen who I have been corresponding with for about a month trying to get our schedules together. I tell you if were not for that appointment and how satisfied I and I know he was I would have probably broke down then. I ignored the email, woke up thinking about it, spent the whole day thinking of it, still ignoring it until finally the next day (last night) thinking of all that I have tried to share, and of becoming a part of it seems resistant community. Trying to be nice, fit in, give and take, laugh and joke, educating myself to the industry, and learning from others experience, giving those who were in the same boots as me some of things that I have learned back, and making them feel less alienated. I said I need to share my thoughts, so I did.

It was an emotional response but I am sure we have those moments and I thank everyone for their great input..it made me feel alot better believe me. All the wonderful PM's thank you so much. I will not give up hope on these great people. I understand more in that, this industry like any other has its moments and believe me in my professional life I had a time or two where it broke me down but noone ever knew it, I would speak to someone that I knew had my best interest at hand, and move on. As I feel you guys do..so with that I will move on and continue to try.

Smooches to you all
XOXOX

Also I've included a link to a previous thread that I wrote on..hope you enjoy my thoughts.

please check my last post, posted today..I explain my thought process behind the return client rate..

Thank you for your response..

XOXOXOX

I did clarify some things in my latest post below. I have pretty much for the most part given a multiple hour discount.

And wow did not know that you could research like this on TER..but I pretty much do my own research which is how I came up with my rate.

When I first came into the industry, I worked with an agency for about 1 week, probably less then that before I knew I needed to go independent plus the agency seemed fishy and I'm glad I got out of there because I read some things about them (the agency) as my ties to the community deepened. They had me at $350 an hour, and most times I would be tipped $50 or more so when I became an independent I thought I should stay at that price range. After doing my own research I saw that I was pretty much in line with most of the providers in my area who were at the level I considered myself to be on as far as class, appearance, personality etc.

But like Katie said, if I put a value on what I feel I am worth, then no one could afford me. So like her, I am putting a $ value to my time which I feel is reasonable given the experience.

I elaborated more in my post below but thanks again for your comments and advice.

Smooches
Chi

I love the way that you write, it is so humorous but serious all at once. You can not take offense to someone who writes the way that you do because its clearly not malicious, and very intelligent.

I have much to learn in this industry but I welcome it, but this should also be an indication that those few are not dealing with someone stupid, or someone that is cold around the heart. I have already let it go and freed myself of anymore nonsense. I will still remain professional, I will still give the same level of service with a smile, and still remain  hopeful that I will those who have the worst intentions will change their ways.

I responded below to clarify a few things but I wanted to write to you directly..


Smooches...
Chi

I am sorry that happened to you. I can take brutal honesty as much as anyone can but some things I don't people even think about before saying. I'm sure you hear this alot but there is nothing wrong with your body, and I would try to get you too He missed out..and whoever wrote the email missed out as well too bad for both of them.

You are so right it takes all kinds to make this world we live in go round. So we let them do their part, and we do ours...simply.

Take care sweetie...
Smooches
Chi

Yep even in the face of adversity, I will still keep my composure, no need for curses, or even wishing one to death (lol). They will get what they deserve soon enough, so there is no need for me to add to that.

Smooches
Chi

I more often then not pamper myself and my body, could use someone else pampering it too.. Besides the pleasure I get I mean..lol

Thank you sweetheart.

we are all on a journey here... this is but the highway... and not the destination.   you seem to be in much better spirits.. and that was the intent!  lol!!!

Sorry to hear of that email you received. Lots of us in Chicago admire you, please try to keep that in mind when some oddball tries to harm you like that.  xoxox