So far, I only have two

no feas, no gordas y no viejas  

I figure I got that covered about half the time.

I will NEVER have a GF where I am not the biggest drunk in the relationship.

1. Stick to the budget I've set
2. Only book with well-reviewed providers

Must see: any girl flexible enough to fold her legs behind her neck

giving great oral (BBBJ). I too have a budget and need to stay within otherwise there will be more time than I like between visits.

I may like to fuck, but not with just anyone. I am partial to fit and beautiful rebels.

No deposits unless I've already met her

I never seem to pay more than a certain amount per hour. Not too little per hour either.  
No CBJ....
No driving too far..

Lots of good input here, so i"ll add mine:

While I would also gravitate to the BBBJ, there are instances of gals whose CBJ blows away other's BBBJ.
I met one such gal some years ago and was familiar with her reputation, so I took a chance and was amply rewarded.  Sadly she is retired now.

ohhhhh no....my mantra is

Must Book - girl friendly (really bi)
                      present/former stripper
                      warm, engaging email replies
                       

I thought EVERYONE knew that lopaw loves strippers. Haven't you been reading her posts? lol

reason(s).

...a provider does not have to be (or been) a stripper for me to book her. But if she has most everything else that I look for and she DOES happen to be a stripper - then it's a must book for me. I'd never pass someone like that up.

No ugly, no fat, no old

1. Don't book unless her reviews say she does BBBJ (CBJ doesnt do it for me)
2. Don't book if her pics are fugly.
3. Don't book if more than 2 of her reviews rate her as below a 7 for performance.  (Wanna see 8s and above on performance, I know reviews are mostly BS, but multiple 5's or below indicate a problem, I usually discount 1 or 2 out of 30 positive reviews, everybody has an "off" day once in a while).
4. Look for providers who are laid back rather than "hustle and rush", I hate jaded pros.  Pretend convincingly at least!
5. Look for someone near home (Long Island), traveling to NYC on my day off is a pain in the ass (unless she is reaaallly special)
6. If she is good at edging BBBJ's, book immediately.
7. If the price point is 200 above the "going rate" she probably isn't worth it. (Tried a few a higher rate gals, very little difference from lower priced dates except that I was poorer and she was richer.)  
8. I like DFK, DATY and CIM, all pluses if gal offers or accepts, not deal breakers though.
9. Clock watchers need not apply.
If I go over I will compensate.  Generally won't be too far over because I am respectful of time, but "to the minute" is a turn off.  If I pay for an hour I expect at least an hour.  Its time, not # of cups.  (Generally I can do 1- 2 in an hour or 3 in 2 hours).