I've been delaying my review on a well-reviewed provider because I thought she was so sweet and fun and willing and generous with her time I just didn't want to hurt her feelings by telling the truth about how she looks. Now this isn't one of those subjective "her butt's too big" or "she's just too thin", this is about how touched up her online photos are completely hiding what can most politely be described as 'a poor complexion'...yet other reviews give her 8's and 9's consistently saying she looks 'just like her photos'!!!
Clearly they were overly-influenced by all her positive characteristics, and I understand that, but I confess I wish SOMEONE has said SOMETHING about the, um, limits on her beauty. Give her a 10 for her eager no-holds-barred absolute GFE but don't let that spill over and deny the fact that if you want a beautiful woman to open the door and smile at you, you better go somewhere else!
It's just not that easy to turn on your heel and go from a pre-arranged appointment back to your empty car and your empty home, so you stay and she's wonderful to you and you end up liking her -- so SAY THAT! Or should I be nice and just let it go...
So, what would you do?

it can drive one buggy. with few exceptions i've vowed NOT to tell providers my TER handle so i don't have to have these "pangs of conscience". it sucks. you're ethically bound to the brotherhood to be truthful ("she's thick, nothing like her pics", etc) but financially bound to her if you wanna go back and get discounts, etc. even if you don't plan to revisit, you might be emotionally bound to her in which case there's her "feelings" to consider (yes, i mean those quotation marks! LOL)

would i be burned at the stake if i humbly suggested that in a parallel TER-universe providers should NOT be allowed to read the juicy details?  yes i know, how else could they pull fake reviews, but there are many other avenues for dealing with that.

i can already smell the bonfires being ignited!  LOL








-- Modified on 7/14/2003 10:33:50 PM

The question isn't (I don't think) how MUCH to include, but IN WHAT MANNER. I've politely reviewed people and included negative comments such as "Although some may find her to be X, my personal preferences are quite different, because I prefer Y [insert specifics here] and did not find her to be like that." If it's simply a case of physical appearance, then website pics ought to overcome most of your trepidation -- refer your readers to her homepage! My greatest difficulties in the "tact" department come when trying to review nicely someone who simply has very little SKILL at a given particular act. Obviously, that judgment must be simply in my own assessment, based on my own lifetime of experience, and therefore will be quite subjective -- but more accurate than the provider's, probably. Whatever the issue, you can also include disclaimers -- "Maybe she was having a bad day; maybe *I* was having a bad day"; or "Clearly, as far as others' reviews go, this has only been a problem for me"; etc.

It's no wonder we all lie so well and so often. Truth hurts and neither sex is immune from the pain.
  If her performance was a 9 or 10 then focus on the performance and say as little about her looks as you can. In this way you can be faithful to your brethren hobbyists and sensitive to the provider in question.

    Reviews are truly a double edged sword that can cut either party. If the edge of that sword is tactlessly blunt then its going to be needlessly messy and painfull.

I think I would concentrate on the postive and mention towards the end that her photos were touched up.  That way if some one has a question they can e mail you.  It is nice when you can concentrate on the good things.  How important were the diffrences in her looks to you?  If they were not important they likely will not be important to the next guy.  But remember she is someones daughter,sister or mother. Treat her like you would treat someone you cared about.  These are our women we have to take care of them and she was there for you when you needed her.

Totally agree. You don't have to score this person an 8 or 9.
You can bring that mark down but do it gracefully and considerately, and remember while you may not have found her attractive others did. If you don't believe any of those comments, put your views in, but in a gentle manner that still emphasizes the positives. It can be done. That is the beauty of the English language...

You should try to be as tactful as possible.  However just saying her photos have been retouched is really not sufficient IMHO.  C'mon guys the lady obviously knows that her complexion is not great and that is probably why she had the photos retouched.  So putting it politely she is trying to deceive you about her looks so that you will be more likely to visit her.  I am not saying that you have to make the review nasty but you should truthfully report what you saw.  Based upon some of the responses on this thread maybe we should just let the ladies write their own reviews.  

-- Modified on 7/15/2003 1:00:15 AM

-- Modified on 7/15/2003 1:02:18 AM

I had the same problem.  Her pics were great, gorgeous body, perfect ass, perky breasts, even showed her cute face with a little smerky smile.  But when I met her and she opened her mouth with a full smile, I felt like she was right out of the movie Deliverance with Burt Reyolds.  She needed some serious dental work.  I ended up not even posting the review since TER wouldn't accept her website, which is from a competing site, which was OK by me.

Nothing bothers me more than reviews that make negative comments about appearance when there is no need to do so. More often than not, these comments just point out something that is fairly obvious (or can easily be inferred) from the pictures on the provider's website.

One could easily make the case that the appearance of the provider in question was not that important to you, because you had a great time with her. Additionally, her appearance must not be an issue to anyone else, based on their reviews.

Having said all that, if you must say something, keep it non-descriptive. Something like "I didn't think she looked like her pictures."

Remember that there are those who do plant  fake reviews out there. I would want to know who is saying what about me, and if it was 100% accurate. Not that reviews are 100% accurate, more like 90% lol. But if the guy is writing that I performed voodism in the room, yes I will contest it for I am a christian woman and that would go against my religion.

As for the lady with the bad complexion. I just hope it didn't stop you from completing your orgasms, and having a great time with her. We ladies have good memories. I always remember every single guy who wrote my reviews. If you have no plans on ever seeing her again, then write to your hearts content. If you do write it, be tactful (as some of the gentlemen have written). Yes, you are paying to be with her. But look at it this way, she could have looked at you, realized that you do have a flaw somewhere (only GOD is perfect to me), and could have refused you at the door, or during the appt. I've been with clients who have scars, disfigurements, clear skin, burned skin. I never refused them, for they deserve the right to be happy, just like the rest of us. Also, I found them to be VERY charming and very good lovers, for they made up in personality, and I would find myself wanting to repeat with them. If you were not to her satisfaction IN LOOKS, it and if she didn't display her emotions to you, GOOD FOR HER. Believe me, there are ladies out there, who only cater to the handsome men out there, so Joe Blow with the skin condition would should not apply.

Do NOT airbrush your review.  Try to be honest without being hurtful.  Sometimes that's harder to do than others.  Your review is intended to let fellow hobbyists know what to expect if they call her.  If you want to suck up, go to that "other" board.

I've wondered the same thing about some of the reviews.  There are some girls who have been around a while and get great reviews, but have "plain" looks.  Some of these girls consistently get 9's and 10's in the looks department.

I know that looks are subjective, but (and I'm not trying to be rude) some of these girls are not "A Once in a Lifetime experience" by anyones standards if you are talking about looks.  I may be skeptical, but sometimes I wonder if there are girls out there that make up 2 or 3 reviews every month for themselves.

Just because you may have found a woman plain, doesn't mean another man did. That is why you will probably find a provider with different ratings on looks. Some men might have found her beautiful in his eyes, it doesn't mean that he was wrong in his findings. Some men might have found her a "plain jane" and he could be right in his findings.

Case in point: some women might find George Clooney very handsome. I don't. He doesn't appeal to me at all. To me, he has a weird looking face. A woman may rate him a "10" in looks, where I would only rate him a "6". Whereas, he is not butt ugly, and is easy on the eyes, but not my ideal matinee idol. It doesn't make either of us ladies wrong in our conclusions. Not every woman of the world will appeal to you, and you won't be appealing to some of the ladies of the world either. If a day ever came that TER would allow ladies to review the guys (maybe one day! lol   since more ladies today are choosing to pay for their VIP memberships, along with the men, which every lady should take advantage of this option), you will find that the majority of the reviews of the men will be under the "10" in looks, and YMMV will be stamped at the end of the paragraph, and just like a guy can write about the bad complexion of a woman's face. Imagine how he would feel if she wrote about his acne on his penis lol Yes, there are cases like that, seen with my own eyes.





-- Modified on 7/15/2003 6:18:09 AM

She is a sweetheart, and really cares about you getting your money's worth. And she has plenty of photos on her website so you can see that she really could lose a few pounds and be a lot hotter looking.  She has some very old very small scars on her face from a car accident years ago.  When a reviewer characterized her as "she is no beauty queen" it just about destroyed her. I knew exactly what he was talking about and he was correct but not tactful.  However no amount of tact would have lessened the impact on the provider.  So I truly wonder just how you can give the other guys a heads up without hurting the girls feelings.  I had hoped his criticism might have spurred her to lose some weight but it just made her angry with the reviewer..  and as long as she continues to get a lot of business she has no real incentive for self improvement..

have you ever seen a finer set of nuts? not to mention the "complexion" of my ball sac

I agree with the previous writers that indicate tact.  There is a way to say what you want to say without sounding deliberately mean.

Bad:  She's so heavy, her ass generates it's own gravitational field.
Better: She obvioulsy lives well.

Bad: Her complexion is so bad, I wanted to ask "what's par for your face?"
Better: When she smiled, I could see the experience in her face.

Bad: When she opened the door, I gasped in horror.
Better: As she opened the door, she took my breath away.

Bad: I was shocked at how airbrushed her pictures were.  I felt like asking her in her granddaughter was home.
Better: In addition be being a good provider, she's very skilled on the computer.

We'll all understand.

You are right.  That really clears it up for me.  I just had to think of a few girls that I don't like that other people think are goddesses.

I don't think you should go into details about what you didn't like about her physically.  It would suffice to say, "I was disappointed because she didn't look like her pictures" or something similar.

"tail" end. Can't have a bushey tail, can we
? lol

-- Modified on 7/15/2003 9:56:06 AM

If you had a good time with this provider and want to continue to see her (and even if you don't plan on seeing her again), simply write her a kind note and let her know what you think her shortcomings are if they are correctable.  If not, bite your tongue and live with it.

Lambasting her in a review is rude unless some bait-and-switch was involved.  

Hey, she's human, just like you.  If she is making others happy, getting good reviews and making a good living at it, why screw it up for her (financially or emotionally).

Just my opinion and I could be wrong.
Regards,
Loarthan

"Just my opinion and I could be wrong."

You are not wrong. You sir, are correct. Very well put, in fact. Thank you.


Now, that will be $100!

You could write something like, "She looked like her pictures except her complexion was not as smooth as I had expected, and there were some acne scars present. However, I soon forgot all about that as we started kissing......etc etc etc."

Believe me, the provider knows she has a bad complexion (all of us women are pretty self-critical). She probably is surprised no one has mentioned it before in a review.

I don't think she would be unduly offended by this approach, since you have told the truth tactfully, and then gone on to emphasize the great performance.

Thus, you've helped enlighten your fellow TER readers, yet haven't burned any bridges with the provider in case you want to see her again.

But not everyone wants to hear that.  I have had similar experiences.  Sometimes the photos don't match or sometimes one drink too many and you're dealing with a psycho.  I've dealt with it both ways. Sometimes I've written the review and sometimes I haven't. In all cases the girls were well reviewed before I met them. But ethically speaking I did a great disservice to all the men on this board when I did not write the reviews.  On the other hand sometimes you write the review and even though the text explicitly says how nice someone was or how great this or that was - the girls remove themselves from this site because they got a review they didn't like.  So down the road the result for the next hobbyist is the same as if I never wrote the reviews. I take solace in the fact that atleast I tried to do the right thing and hopefully a few guys saw the reviews before the girls pulled them.
The problem that this brings to light, which we're not really addressing here, is rate inflation.  An elite escort in Vegas once put this all into perspective.  She is consistently one of the top ten girls in the west and certainly top two or three in Vegas.  She never ever claims to be model material. Her direct quote to me was "I don't expect guys to say I look like a model - BECAUSE I DON'T, if I was a model would I really be doing this?"  
There are probably a handful of girls in every major city that honestly should be rated as 9s and 10s in beauty.  Probably dozens though who should be rated that way in personality, performance, effort etc...  But in the blissful haze after the hump of your life (until the next date) you don't always have the right glasses on and 7s become 9s.  Well after a few years of this any girl who gets a 5 is going to feel like she's getting slammed when a guy is just trying to be honest.  
In summary:
To me photo doctoring or allowing old photos to stay on your website is basically BAIT and SWITCH! The cold hard facts are that this is a business. It is probably the purest form of basic capitalism. Fair market value is only achieved when an informed buyer and seller reach an agreement. When old photos or doctored photos are used to induce an agreement then the customer has a right and a DUTY to inform other potential customers of this heinous activity.

i will have more to say on this (somewhat technical) topic later, but i just wanted to say that scampr makes a very good point that's worth embellishing (a bit) further.


in the post-lay endorphin-drenched state of euphoria that can mentally (if not physically) last several days - long enough to write the review - most guys may still confuse their warm fuzzy perceptions with cold hard reality, mistaking appearance with performance or just THINKING she's pretty based on other things (like "that really cute joke she made on my way out!")

the laws of statistics say that there ought to be "error bars" to go with each "estimate" (darn, where's Mathesar when you need him) and our TER numerical ratings are precisely that: imprecise estimates.

now, i figure the cursed YMMV factor should count for (at least) a 1.0 point margin (let's stick with appearance, for now). therefore when you see a gal who gets, for example, an appearance rating of 8, here's how i would interpret it

Rating = 8  
Margin = [-1,+1]
____________________
Score  = [7,9]

so now our score has a range. btw, [x,y] means all the values between x (lower limit) and y (upper limit) ... sorry if i'm insulting anyone's intelligence, just trying to be didactic, is all

HOWEVER (and herein lies the rub) given the hormonal bias of over-estimating a girl's looks coupled with the curious phenomenon that the higher the score is (say above 7) the more likely it is to be inflated, a systematic correction is definitely in order. in this case, the corrected margin (Margin*) should probably be just a -1 decrease with no corresponding increase (+0). thus,

Rating = 8
Margin* = [-1,0]
____________________
Score*  = [7,8]


i think you get the idea.


SUMMARY of Lesson #1:  

define the margin that makes sense for you and correct the scores accordingly. to me the right score (Score* in this notation) is either what's already there or (far more likely) ONE LESS!

which is why i've advocated (since day one) that the "one in a million" perfect 10s should all be knocked down to 9s because of this. not to mention the proverbial "you never know what's waiting around the corner" factor, let alone the afterlife!

ok kids, class dismissed ... "Schoooooooool's OUT ... for the Summer!!" -- Alice Cooper  

LOL


---------------------------------------------------------------

NEXT TOPIC:  Bias & Skewed Statistics  or  "What Ever Happened to the Scores 1, 3 and 4?"  

Sneak/Quick Answers: let's face it, the range [1,5] is under-represented and a somewhat vague "no man's land", thankfully perhaps. in this twilight zone of reviews, 2 and 5 seem to be the most common "bail out" scores for the lazy or indecisive reviewer. a 2 means a "fugly" or a wasted lay but then "to give her a 1 would be too cruel" and 5 usually means: "hell i don't know, i don't have time for this, i can't make up my mind. how do YOU define sorta kinda average in a BAD way? isn't it enough that she wasn't the 9 i was hoping for? what do you WANT from me anyway!?"


remember to bring your teacher an apple!  







-- Modified on 7/15/2003 8:22:50 PM

I'd rather just be told she has some acne scars but otherwise looks good, but you forgot to include the performance bias in your equation.  Any performance rated higher than 7 tends to add 1 to 2 points to looks, but any performance lower than 5 tends to subtract 1 to 7 points from looks.  I know you wanted to stick to appearance, but appearance and performance are inexorably linked.

-- Modified on 7/15/2003 5:53:19 PM

so his complexion is a flawless GREEN!  If you want a handsome guy, then go hire a male escort and he can pretend that you're a babe instead of you having to take some poor dull-looking shlub's money and pretend that he's a total hunk!

OBVIOUSLY it would be nice for every provider if she only had to service Brad Pitt lookalikes, but those guys aren't goiing to pay $$$$/hour to daty! If you're going to hold your hobbyists to as high a standard of 'beauty' as the paying hobbyist is going to hold his paid-for provider, then no $$ should change hands!! I really don't understand your viewpoint!

The hobbyist's ONLY responsibility to the provider is to be well-groomed, polite, respectful, and BRING THE MONEY. It is NOT the hobbyist's responsibility to be sufficiently attractive that he could seduce the provider into a freebie!! Because he ain't gonna get a freebie!!

Can somebody clue me in on what I'm missing here?

I actually posted a negative review one time.  The provider figured out my handle and CALLED ME AT HOME to bitch about the review.  I rated her a little low on the looks side.  Performance was OK (7) but not what she usually did.  YMMV.  I was very upset that she would call me at home about this.

I'm sure other people have had similar situations.  Use a different handle and post HONESTLY, not cruelly.  You owe it to yourself, the guys and the ladies.

Jackie Gleason always said: " I drink to get rid of the warts and pimples, on other people." No one ever looks like those airbrushed beauties in Playboy, but unless I feel as if I was defrauded I am always kind in my reviews if the woman has a good attitude and gives me all that I came for and more.

who she was with u looks pos.  i think when u meet someone "U" are not personally attracted to, that's all that's necessary.  "not my type physically"  any realistic person will not get hurt feelers about that.  truthful, not hurtful.
i don't have reviews..but i read something that was added to another gurls site and i am pretty pos. it was about me.  i have high metabolism and lose weight fast.  not ethiopia skinny folks...i don't have issues with weight.  i recently resigned from a high stress position...one of the wonderful parting gifts i received was a tendancy to get bumps on my cheeks by my ears caused from stress.  friends state it's not noticable but on this one occasdion i wads sure they were.  i waws running a lot and had very little body fat also.  he described me as gaunt with a bad complection. (and now i can't spel ithr) he could have been blunt which is a form of comm. i prefer and ask me.  no embarrassment.  it was 1 wk of bad appearance.  he was nice about it.  no hurt feelers here.  this was only one.  
pls...insomnia right now...suggestions on how to sleep??  3 days..tried warm milk...gross...no med sugestions don't take.