Im overweight and I get very uncomfortable when I feel rushed and not provided what some of u get.  I wanna meet a sexy blonde provider but dont contact them thinking I might have a bad experience I used to weight 450lbs but now im 290lbs and still not comfy.  Recommendations or referrals to providers will b appreciated

Seems a bit odd.  Most providers who I've read about who weighed in on this subject (pun intended) did not see weight as an issue.  Personality and hygiene much more important.  

That said, why not ask a provider you want to see.  Just be blunt and say, "this is my situation....if you would not feel comfortable seeing me, please let me know.  I just don't want to be self conscious if we did meet.  I'd feel now ill will if this is a problem for you and it would remain our secret."

Sincere thanks in advance.

Something simple and to the point.  One thing I've learned just reading this board is that providers 1. generally have big hearts, and 2. They have no problem being honest if you ask them a question!  LOL

Congrats on your weight loss! That's definitely a great accomplishment

There could be two possible reasons for your tough time: your choice of provider or what you are (or not doing). Every provider is different, but usually companions who are known to provide unrushed, genuine experiences should undoubtedly be what you need to look for when choosing a companion.

Also, looks usually will do not matter as long as you conduct yourself as a gentleman. There is nothing like a bad attitude to make even the most handsome of faces revolting (and it goes for us ladies too). Great hygiene is also a must if you want a lady to get up close and personal - and enjoy it.

These tidbits are common sense in the hobby, but if none of these apply, I would say its more in your head than you think.

So,

Pick a lady who puts that sparkle in your eye, make sure basic etiquette of the hobby is followed, RELAX, and enjoy yourself. You have earned it

-- Modified on 10/28/2012 1:46:48 PM

Make it clear what you are looking for: "...I feel rushed and not provided what some of u get." doesn't make any sense. If you are holding back from contacting a provider because you "might" have a bad experience, then forget about ever doing it because there is always a chance that you will have a bad experience - ESPECIALLY if you approach it with that attitude.

"Recommendations or referrals" to what? Are you looking for providers who "specialize" in overweight clients? They don't exist.

Here's a tip: ALL providers are providing a service for a fee. The service includes some level of fantasy. MOST providers do not accept or reject clients based on how attractive they are. Every once in a while a provider may be attracted to a client, and have real multiple orgasms, but most of the time the screams and claw marks are for your benefit.

There are certainly some male clients who are exceptionally physically attractive Most of us are average at best, and a lot of us are plain looking, over or under weight, less-then-perfect physical specimens.

If your own insecurities, body image, and lack of sexual confidence are making it difficult for you to approach a woman, then I respectfully suggest you consult a therapist first.

If you are determined to take the plunge, than:
1) Do your homework, pick a well-reviewed provider or two
2) Go through their screening
3) Describe yourself accurately and tell them about your worries. Don't make a big deal out of it, just be sure they know you are looking for someone who is accepting.

The worst thing that will happen is that you will have less than a "10" experience, the same fear we all live with

You are on the General Board using an alias, so how is anyone supposed to know where you live and who you have reviewed?  Just from one glance at past reviews, it would be easy to see what was not adding up. If you are only seeing BP girls with no rep, good indicator of why service lacks. Most BP girls (Not just providers who use BP but also have reviews mind you), do not provide MSOG.

You need to post on your regional board. If you don't have any reviews, that might be why you are being ripped off. Providers willing to see newbies with no info. are not too worried about the fall out. They figure you won't review them, so they take advantage of you. As long as you are clean and respectful, I can't imagine weight being an issue for rushing. It might be an issue for being declined by very petite women. Not all women can handle a larger guy....they just don't know their way around that body type, and are afraid of being hurt. The more mature providers would probably be a better choice for you, as they are more gfe and have been around long enough to have seen it all and know how to cater to each person as an individual.

Best of luck and sorry you are having to deal with this. I know so many wonderful men whose weight is such a tiny factor when considering their overall demeanor and genuine compassion for the providers they see.

-- Modified on 10/28/2012 7:13:25 PM

I'm overweight as well, about 20 lbs., but overweight is overweight. I don't let that fact enter into the decision to hobby though because this is their chosen profession and not too many good looking guys hobby (they can get it free if they're good looking and fit). So, I think the ladies know they are going to have to act when they are entertaining hobbyist's. I would be invisible to the providers I see if it weren't for the arrangement. In my opinion the best providers are the ladies that can make you feel good for 2-4 hours at a time even though you know they're not at all attracted to you. You may have to accept that she will have to ride you (for safety reasons) but I assume that's not a problem.

Now, I posted a similar remark in a previous post and some hobbyist comes back and says he's good looking and get's it for free with good looking women in the bars, but still hobbys. OK, I don't understand why but more power to him, he's probably the 10% of hobbyists as I'll assume 90% of us aren't attractive.

on losing 160 pounds! Even if you are still self concious at 290, the fact that you have lost as much weight as you said, is a major accomplishment and something to be proud of! Keep at it.

As for your question, I agree with London's post. That is what I was going to post before reading hers. (great minds thnk alike). I believe your issue is not doing proper research and seeing the wrong providers. All the good providers will tell you it is about hygiene, acting like a gentleman, and having the proper donation. Size should not matter.
Good Luck

......keep up the good work, OP!  Your life depends on it.

Hugs and Kisses,
Kelly

I don't see it as an impediment.   So long as you take pains to be clean & treat her with respect, you'll be fine.

Hi,

.. lose a 100 #'s!! Before I lost the poundage I made successful choices in choosing women in this hobby!! That Includes research of well reviewed women & trusting established reviewers on non highly reviewed women that catch my eye!! I'm ugly as sin & tell the women of my situation in corresponding e-mails!! To this day I've never had a problem w/ any woman when I offer them full disclosure of god's practical joke on me!! So, don't worry about the weight issue, see well reviewed ladies & have fun, because speaking of experience w/ weight Issues & this hobby, It's all good!!

I see quite a few good looking gents.  There are many reasons to hobby, some of them seem to be having a really busy career and no time to chase tail, having a long term partner with whom sex has ended or is minimal, and just not wanting to deal with emotional strings ect.  For example one of my really good looking friends just recently got divorced.  The last thing he is looking for is a girl who will get hung up on the situation.  This way it's clean and easy, no strings attached.
That being said one of my nicest clients is around 300 lbs.  
Personally, I have never chosen my real life mate on looks alone, but more on his ability to make me laugh, impress me in multiple ways, intelligent conversation and shared interests.  I'm not saying I wouldn't give Keanu a shot, but I don't tend to go for the guys that know they are hot even though I could bag them no problem...I prefer a guy who is down to earth and easy to be around...hobbyists turn up with all kinds of interesting attributes and looks are the least of my concern...that being said, I do screen with a photo request as I prefer to know I can at least make a connection with my friends and I'm more intuitive with something tangible--also I am not comfortable with the idea of someone I've never laid eyes on showing up...I'm not a very good actress

If you are rushed out the door before your PAID time is up..you are being rushed. If you are at your time limit and she makes a move to get you moving..you are NOT being rushed.

You might have read a review or 10, however, there is this thing called YMMV. Just because said provider did xy and z with joe shmoe, does NOT mean she is going to do that with every man she meets. Why you ask? Okay, maybe an example might help;

You are a male escort and you are reviewed. You had daty minus a dental dam with three ladies that reviewed you. An over weight lady shows up for her appointment and wants daty sans wrap and you don't like what you see/smell so you say no sweetheart, we are going to use that wrap today or you might even refuse pint blank.

Unless your nose is 1 centimeter from your balls and ass, you don't make that call.

So if I am off base, let me know what you mean by ...and not provided what some of u get...

This is the biggest slab of horse shit I read about reviews and what one girl does with some guys, she is expected to do with EVERYONE. If you are too big, not clean, have something growing that should not be there, then she makes that call.

Well it seems you may be different than most women. I am down to earth and I've had two providers give me the best two compliments I've ever gotten from anyone. One provider told me "you are a free spirit", if you knew me in my professional life you'd never say that about me but being conservative professionally provides me the income to be myself away from work. Another provider told me "you are genuine", also an incredible compliment to me. But honestly, I would be invisible to either woman were it not for the hobby. And that's OK, we can't all be good looking, if we were then no one would be and it would be a boring world to live in. I can see that you would have some good looking clients based upon the scenerios you described but if you were honest I'd presume that a greater percentage of your clients are not the kind of men you would be with in "real life". There is no catch all so I understand that some good looking men hobby, I'm simply saying I'll bet that's a very small percentage of the population. I'll finish by saying that I am comfortable in my own skin, even though I know I'm not good looking. I like who I am and what I've become.

This is the general discussion board. The discussion of providers and your weight issue is ok here. But this is not the place to look for specific recommendations for a lady. Post on the ISO board for that. You can also try posting on the DC regional board but the post may get moved to ISO anyway. Better yet, just do some research. You admitted yourself that you research "somewhat." Obviously you need to research more. Search reviews, and check the DC ad boards. You speak like there are no blonde providers in DC! LOL! Just checking "new reviews" for the last two weeks brings up 61! DC is a hobby playground with many ladies of all types available.

By the way, do you realize that you are not allowed to post on the same thread under your alias and your username? Admin can flip your alias (of course you already outed it) and suspend your posting privileges.

You should spend some time on the newbie board. Read back 10 or 15 pages there, and read the "self help center."

I just posted this under your reply where you outed your alias, but the post disappeared. I guess you realized you outed your alias and had your posts pulled along with london's reply and mine. I am reposting this and it may not make sense to all, since it was a reply to a post that doesn't exist anymore (where you mentioned "somewhat" researching and blondes in DC.) However, the advice still stands so I am reposting:

London is correct. This is not the ISO board.
This is the general discussion board. The discussion of providers and your weight issue is ok here. But this is not the place to look for specific recommendations for a lady. Post on the ISO board for that. You can also try posting on the DC regional board but the post may get moved to ISO anyway. Better yet, just do some research. You admitted yourself that you research "somewhat." Obviously you need to research more. Search reviews, and check the DC ad boards. You speak like there are no blonde providers in DC! LOL! Just checking "new reviews" for the last two weeks brings up 61 names! DC is a hobby playground with many ladies of all types available.

You should spend some time on the newbie board. Read back 10 or 15 pages there, and read the "self help center."

absolutely, of course, I never said I didn't visit with men who I wouldn't see in real life, but I would venture to say of the men I see, probably 30% I would see in real life if we had anything in common...so far, not really...but that's fine, it could become problematic if I was actually interested in someone beyond the guidelines that my job requires

unattractive? I would guess they/we are just average looking(just like the rest of the population) which doesnt equate to ugly.

I see this type of comment often.

so me thinks that, and not his weight, is the issue. If he is getting crappy service, my guess is he is cruising BP and though there are gems on there to be found, it is far from the norm. Most of those girls do not care what type of service they deliver because they don't plan on being around that long or building a rep quality behind it.

feel so low on yourself it is coming across in your attitude when you meet providers?

I think most providers, myself included treat men respectfully, and I do not look at weight but attitude and chemistry. In fact one of my ATF clients is very large, but we have a wonderful time.
We kiss, and have wonderful oral. HE is super sweet and I never rush him or treat him different.

He has a great outlook on life and him self.

Sometimes if you have a bad outlook, it can come across as a chip on your shoulder and that can rub off?

If you find a very patient provider who consistently has high marks on their service you may find it less likely to run into this also?