Cards on the table, I'm new to hobbying.  I've had a couple of dates and have yet to post a review.  But, I've been stalking TER and reading reviews for a long while.  

I think I've identified a pattern with provider behavior.  I've seen this pattern in many reviews that I've read.  Particularly when reading multiple reviews from the same lady.  And, I've found this to also be true of the reviews across numerous ladies.

It goes like this:  The session starts with LFK/DFK but then goes straight to a ferocious BBBJTC/BBBJCIM (or some version of oral pleasure that results in the client's orgasm).

I'd like to hear opinions on this question:  Are providers going straight to the blowjob/orgasm, because that's what guys want right out of the gate (what's not to like)?  Or, are they going there, because they've learned that it takes the steam out of the guy and then they don't have to work as hard after or tolerate a bunch of clumsy groping and rolling around?  Or, might it be a defense mechanism, that reduces the risk that they might have a genuine, intimate connection with a client?

Has anyone else noticed this?  Is this SOP (standard operating procedure) for providers?  Or, am I projecting?

A connection can be achieved on many different levels in many different ways, but speaking for me, the "connection" you speak of mostly comes from the pre-date text/email, the introductory conversation at the beginning of the date and the pillow talk that occurs after the sex, and not necessarily from the sex itself. While I have read reviews like the one you mention, they could be due to the fact that the lady reads the gentleman's reviews before they meet and she is just trying to please him in the manner he enjoys the most. If you read enough reviews, you will also see many gentlemen will say that while they were on the edge of orgasm from oral activities, they stopped the woman from completing the act because he had to have intercourse with her.

Also, every provider is wonderfully unique, so lumping them together and looking for a SOP can be an exercise in futility, imo.

What you just described probably pretty much sounds like most guys dream dates as long as she tries her best afterwards to get MSOG.

given you say you're relatively new to playing the game here my suggestion would be to worry less about why that pattern seems to occur (I agree there is generally a progression from less intimate to more intimate) and more on just what you need to happen to make the sessions as rewarding for you as possible.

 
If you need to hold off on cumming until late in the session for some reason, or don't want to complete via oral, you need to manage the session a bit. If you're just as happy with climaxing in the first 15 minutes and the basking in the glow cuddling with the girl the next 45 minutes do you can when it happens?

I see the wisdom in your response.  The client has some agency here as well.  And, in most cases, one hour is not a lot of time.  And, no time at all for a personal connection.  Hence, "wham bam" is sort of indicated.

Also, just to be clear, I'm not complaining about the practice.  Just observing what I see as a pattern.  And, wondering if others have observed the same.

While it's true that a lot of sessions start with oral, both giving and receiving, much like most sex with non hookers starts off with foreplay, but I can't remember the last time I came during foreplay. That's on you if you can't hold off orgasming until the main course is served.

 
And what is this "genuine, intimate connection with a client" that you are talking about, very few hookers view penetration with a client anymore genuine or intimate than they do BBBJCIM. It's a job, they are getting paid and intimacy is only in YOUR mind, not hers 99% of the time. So YES, you are most definitely projecting

Once you have done this for a while you can quickly (no pun here) tell if you are being hustled out in a hurry, or not.

Develop some techniques to slow things down a bit.  If the lady in questions blows (again, no pun) them off, you know she wants the climax portion to end fast.

Example.  Spend some time kissing and if that is not in the cards, fondling, licking, sucking her boobs.  I love boobs and nipples and will focus on them early on in the session.  She may fondle my prick, even drop down on to blow it, but I will always bring her back up so I can play with her tits.  Or, have her suck on my nipples.

Another good tactic is DATY ....non 69.  Nothing slows the pace down for a guy than eating pussy.  Focusing all your energy on pleasuring her diverts attention away from your dick.

If she balks at any of these maneuvers, you are in for a quick in/out session.  '

On occasion, I have purposely seen providers who follow a set routine, which completely focuses on me, and often ends after a flurry of BBBJ and fucking.  Light on the tits, now DATY, or a small amount of it, with intense blow job and fucking.  

Less GFE and more PSE if you will.  I know that going in so I am not disappointed. Usually is over in the first 30 min or so.

Practice makes perfect, and I am still a long way from perfect.    

Just my two cents.  

P.S. I am a one and done if that helps give context.

Correct.  It is a fantasy, not reality.  Never get the two mixed up.

If you’re going to be honest with us, or more importantly yourself, you really need to acknowledge whether you’re up for MSOG during a date. In terms of your topic, that makes all the difference in the world.

Thanks GaGa for the response.

A couple points...

- I wasn't referring to a client's ability to 'hold off' or not.  I was asking whether there was any validity to many providers adopting an 'early release' strategy.

- Although there may be evidence to the contrary, escorts are human beings.  And as such, susceptible to the same chemical responses that everyone experiences during sexual intimacy, which are intended to lead couples to bond for the purpose of raising children (it's biology baby).  Obviously, companions and clients alike condition themselves to ignore the chemical reactions.  But, under the right circumstances, everyone can be susceptible.  I'm not saying it happens often.  I'm just saying, all of the elements are there.  And escorts in particular need to develop a strong defense (like getting the guy off quick).

Thanks cks.

A valid point to be sure.

need to develop a strong defense (like getting the guy off quick". Where do I start addressing your last sentence?

First GaG gave  you some good advice and you try to correct him in your response back to him.  YES some of the responsibility does lie with you to manage your time if you don't to release in the first 15 minutes.  

As a lady in the biz for a good while, no, I do not do what you describe to make a gent cum quickly.  Also let me remind you it's the clients who right about their experience with a gal he's seen. I dare say some embellish what goes on. They write from a guy's perspective. It may be different if it was written from the lady's perspective.  

Since I don't offer one hour meetings anymore I'm pretty relaxed because 90 minutes minimum  allows more time to let things fall into place and everyone leaves happy.

Here's another thought. Even with only an hour a lot of clients want MSOG so yeah I can see why both parties would want to go at it pretty quickly at first to leave enough time to chill and let some time pass to recharge before getting intimate again.

I personally think Independents are a tad more lenient in how they approach a meeting with a client. Most require some pre-planning. On the other hand you have a better chance to being seen short notice with an agency. If your first choice isn't available, they will tell you who's free  at the time you want to see a lady.    Of course agencies like some pre-planning but they will try to accommodate you on short notice IMO. They may be stricter on time you spend with the lady. Just my observation.  I've heard many times that an agency will call on the minute you are out of time. When an agency gal is "on", they are really "On" and may take more meetings to fully take advantage of being on the clock with their agency, so yes they may get it on faster. My opinion. A smart agency gal also realizes developing "regulars" is a good thing. Indies certainly work off repeats biz but the repeats go to the lady, none goes to an agency.

Since you are new(ish) I'm glad to see you do your homework before booking but maybe try not to read too much into WHY a lady goes for oral so quickly as a bad thing. It's never a good thing to leave the impression that a client was rushed. The smart ladies know this and act accordingly.  

 
Steph XO

END OF MESSAGE

would tend to indicate that in most sessions, the BBBJ is more of a second course (The DFK, etc. being the first course.), and that intercourse or FS is the main course.

 
I also tend to think that most gals prefer to have a guy come in a condom in FS rather than in their mouths without a condom, but there are noted exceptions to this.

At this point in MY life, MSOG is not going to happen in a one-hour session, so when I'm  repeating and wanted two  pops, I book two hours.  I only book one hour with girls I'm seeing for the first time, so I have no expectation whatsoever that a second cup will be served by the lady.    Most of the ladies I see do not even ask about MSOG with me because, with practice, I have learned to pace myself so that I finish after the 45-minute mark in the hour session.  I'm always amused by the guys that complain in their reviews that "there was 15 minutes left, and she didn't offer me MSOG."  LOL

that you speak of usually happens early on in the session, when you hand them an envelope full of cash.  The trick is to hang onto that connection for the rest of the hour.  

Who doesn’t want to get off work early.  
 
Just enough to not lose their “job”.

It’s up to you to get what you need...

I often overindulge on the appetizers and never get to the main course! If I'm lucky, she gets filled up with my appetizers and doesn't miss the main course, either.

Nah

 

Welcome to TER!  Stop being a lurker and step into your role of monger brother...

 

I'm an MSOG monger.  Every kgirl has a script but you have an opportunity to manage the clock.  I like soapy shower fun. Not only does it show the fastidious kgirl that I'm clean, since she just cleaned me herself, but I can ask for seconds during the shower routine.  

 

A two shot session will require you to achieve round #1 by the 25 minute mark.  A three shot session will require you to achieve round #1 by the 10 minutes mark.  And I only do hour sessions.

 

 
YMMV

Steph, Thank you for offering the provider's perspective.

Allow me to make a point.  And I'm making it here, because I liked your post and you touched on the point I'm about to make.

Several of the replies refer to my personal experience as a client, or offer advice to me for future encounters.  It appears that my post was taken as a complaint over a personal experience.  The purpose of my post was not to gripe.  But, to simply try to confirm or dispel what I saw as a possible pattern (my brain works that way).

Thanks again for your response.  

Thanks DJ.

"It's up to you to get what you need..."  Sage advice to be sure.

If it's not in the Newbie FAQ, it should be.

Thanks 2on2 for the excellent and very practical advice.

sounds like the perfect date to me.
-DFK
- Enjoy her beautiful body (looking , Touching, Sucking)
-BBBJCIM.

What else does an old man want!!!!!!!!!

That's one area where repeated one-hour sessions with the same woman can come into play, or escalating to longer sessions with the same woman comes into play, a way for a quasi-connection to develop over time.

 
Of course, many clients have their own one-and-done preference for the hobby in general, and for that reason do not ever repeat a session with the same woman, regardless of how well things went. I acknowledge that as a reality.

Also, I acknowledge that some people don't even seek any type of personal connection, it's just a sexual act and nothing more.

Having read the scenario you present, compassionalism, I thought back and realized that it certainly has been a pattern with some providers I've seen, the move to fellatio very soon into the session.  

As I was thinking about my answer, I just realized that I usually say to the woman right at the beginning of a session that I'm not in a hurry, I assure her that I prefer taking things very slowly.  Some providers, not all, are very businesslike and as such, it seems they assume that they have to rush through things, or that clients want them to get straight to sex acts right away. Of course, providers' collective experience and experiences with clients had taught them that.  I'm not staying a criticism of providers or of their techniques, I'm just making an observation.

 
I think you're definitely onto something about those reviews that state the woman might quickly go for performing oral because in her experience, that's exactly what many men want/expect. I'm not sure about the second part, where it might be a stalling tactic of some sort. Truth be told, some women love giving head, it might just be as simple as that. I don't think there's a general SOP among providers based on avoiding having to work as hard afterwards or tolerate a bunch of clumsy groping and rolling around.  Personally, when a woman is with ME, hard work and tolerating a whole bunch of clumsy groping and rolling around is the order of the day, LOL.

A session with a provider is my fantasy time, and there are parts of it that I want to be prolonged.  I'm the type of guy who likes playfulness and teasing, I even like it when both she and I stay fully dressed for a while as things slowly steam up. That's when we go through the hugging and kissing and slow seduction. Beyond that, or I should say, after that, I'm a foreplay guy, when clothes start getting peeled off.

 
If and when I'm with a provider for the first time, and she starts "going too fast" for my liking, or does something in a different order that I prefer, I just let her know, I steer her in a different direction. Only in a few scattered occasions has that not worked for me.

 

In thinking about this subject you've introduced, I'm not offering advice to you, because I know that's not what you're after, I'm just reflecting on what it brought to mind. I have a tactic of my own that nips the quickie bj in the bud: I have a thing about a mutual shower before melding genitals together, because not only do I want to be sure that she's clean to my liking, I want her to be just as sure that I'm clean to her liking. I don't want her going down on me without having showered in her presence, and I don't want to go down on her if she hasn't showered in my presence. I no more want to just take her word for how clean she is than I expect her to just take my word for how clean I am. For me, every mutual shower with a provider means that even if she washes her body herself, I also wash it, focusing special attention on her genitals and ass.  Every provider I've showered with has always given my dick an extremely thorough washing.  

Lastly, about your being new here and the interaction of how others respond in the Discussion Boards.  I've been on TER just about six months, and I've been posting on Discussion Boards just about three or four months. I have remarked before, and it was acknowledged by members who have several years or decades on here, that quite often the responses to a question have little to do with the main point being asked. People either do not fully read the original post or simply do not understand what is being asked. I've had the same response you did in bringing up a question merely as conversation yet a multitude of the answers, more than 50% of them, were advice to me as to how I could overcome the situation. I was neotheres seeking advice nor had the situation taken place with me. I have learned that the pattern of responding is a part of the culture here and I incorporate it into my enjoyment of the site.

To any and all who read what i just wrote, I am not denigrating any or all of you, I am not saying you are wrong in any way.

a little foreplay, a little mutual oral (or not) and then on to the main event. I would much rather mix it up and go with what I feel like in the moment than follow a script.

Thanks DeClemente,

I've gotten some good responses and excellent advice.  But, of all of the reactions so far,  I feel that you have responded most appropriately to the idea that I was trying to raise.

I wasn't complaining.  I was simply making an observation, and asking whether anyone thought there was any merit.

Many providers try for the early O, it makes the rest of the session easier for them.   However many providers are looking to make repeat customers, so they actually try to anticipate what will bring the client back again.  You have to judge on a case by case basis.

It's just that they do it for VERY different reasons than you describe.

 
Most hookers that try to get a client off quickly aren't worried about falling in love, or otherwise being too intimate, the hookers that do this by and large just want the john to pop and go and they have absolutely ZERO reason to be putting up defenses because most of them feel nothing for their clients and just like a lot of unhappy employees are only interested in getting the job over with as soon as possible.

 
As others have pointed out, you really are over thinking this. Once you have fucked a few thousand women, maybe you will have a point of reference where you can separate the physical act of sex from actual intimacy like most hookers do.

END OF MESSAGE

END OF MESSAGE

and perhaps that is why I don't relate to your question.  

 
Younger guys tend to finish rather easily (and quickly) during a vigorous BJ, but for most of us with a few more miles on us it takes a lot more than an enthusiastic blow job to make us cum before we are ready. I can't remember the last time I came during what I would consider "foreplay" so maybe I just don't identify with the foundation of your question.

When I'm up to it, the appetizer and the dessert are the same thing. Forwards, backwards it's the same result. Hmm, mmm, good!

A little whipped cream and chocolate sauce go a long way.

1. Most of the reviews (on any review site) are embellished to some extent. That "ferocious BBBJTC/BBBJCIM" could easily be read as "I came 10 seconds after she put my dick in her mouth"; it just doesn't do as much for the reviewer's ego.
2. She is managing the time. If you indicate that you want MSOG, she knows you're likely going to need to get off quick the first time so there's a chance of a second finish before time's up.  
3. She's also talking cues from you. If you're expressing how amazing the BBBJ feels, or that you want her to get you off, she's going to respond by doing exactly what you are telling her you want.  
4. If you don't want too cum quick, tell her. You have just as much input and control over how the session goes as she does. You just have to communicate.

From the Newbie FAQ.  See #5  

With the number of responses I am not sure if this was suggested.  Massage.  Give her an oil massage.  Only once have I had a lady prefer not to do so.  I usually save it for a second meeting, once we have established who we are to one another.

Who would not agree to having her aching muscles tended to.  Let her pick the oil and stay away from her honey pot, sometime oil and pussy do not mix for the lady.

Having an escort face down on the bed allows you to control how long and were you want your hands to roam, except as noted above.

Several women love having a foot massage.  You command the flip, and that is when the fun really begins.  Once she is on her back, or side facing you, oil always finds it's way to her boobs....what a pity.  Usually lots of oil.  Somehow the oil will find it's way to your body as well, so be prepared!  

Giving a good massage helps you manage your time so you get the most out of your time together.  

Since you seem prone to making assumptions which I feel are a bit unflattering to providers as a whole, I'm not going to nicey this up for you.

YES.  Also.....oral is a good starting point, especially with nervous clients.  Nothing breaks the ice quite like having your cock in my mouth.  

 If you don't want to finish that way, speak up and say so.  Plenty of clients do.  
I will usually pause at some point to ask if he would like me to continue or if he wants intercourse.  It's the client's choice. I'm doing the Judge Judy head-shake, face-palm move right now.   Yeah, it "takes the steam" out of most men which means if they DO want a 2nd round for penetration it is MORE WORK for us to try to get him hard again.    
NOT LESS. A genuine, intimate connection is established by getting to know the other person.  It is NOT established by which orifice he was in during the date.
For a LOT of ladies, it's EASIER to disconnect and be completely non-present mentally and emotionally when getting fucked vs performing oral.  
Think about it: if the lady doesn't like the guy, what better way to simply get through it than to say "oh fuck me doggy-style baby" then turn around and do her best to ignore the person pounding her?  

 
Not that I have ever, EVER done this, of course.  Beginning with a BJ is pretty common but thereafter?  Nope.   I don't know WHAT you're doing.  

The bottom line is noobs need to learn/train to get what they like. Some personalities are more suited to this hence more successful in life but anyone can enjoy it...  

This hobby makes sex like playing basketball on a 5 fit goal