TER General Board

Ladies - Educate Us, Please!
OCWIZARD 5 Reviews 6903 reads
posted

Please take this as an invitation to vent your frustation at the dumb questions we ask, as well as, to educated and mold us into better companions for you.

Thinking of something to say when you meet someone new is always a challenge.  The hour or two or more that you spend with us has to be a special challenge, especially if the chemistry is not right.  Please share with us the questions we ask that drive you crazy and that you are tired of answering.  Also, I am sure that there are questions that we should never ask or topics to be avoided, not only over the phone or in e-mail, but when we are together, as well.  I'm sure that you get tired of answering the question "Is that your real picture?" or "Why don't you show your face in your ad?"  A topic to avoid might be about your family, background or questions about how many men you have seen.  What are safe topics? Travel? Politics?  The Stock Market?  When all else fails do you start a heated conversation about the color of the curtains in the room (just kidding)?

I'm sure you're thinking this should be common sense, but remember we're men and when did a man ever employ common sense in a sexual setting?  Also, remember, his thinking is clouded by all the wonderful things he has or is about to experience with you!

SexyCurvesDC5967 reads

Questions I don't like, are things like "how many men do you see a day?" and "Am I your first client today?" Oh I hate that... no right way to answer those, because if you answer LOTS AND LOTS of men, that could be a turn off... If you say "Not many" then they think business is slow and they can take advantage. No right answer! Same thing with the second question... and odds are if you ask these questions you won't get an honest answer anyways. (I try to change the subject)

As for what I DO talk about.. If someone is nervous I will usually ask them what made them decide to see me, vs. any other girls. I like to know what particularly drew them to me, and this is a pretty safe question to ask... and also helps me understand their desires better. "Because you seem so sweet" is a very different answer than "Because you seem like you LOVE SEX!" (The two do indeed go together... but show that you might be looking for two different aspects of my sexuality.)  I like that question because it can tell me a lot about them, without their having to say anything that might make them uncomfy.

As for other topics of discussion, I follow leads and play it by ear.  I might ask if they've been busy at work and suggest that they need some relaxation (And I'm here to relax ya honey LOL), I might talk about all kinds of things!  There are very FEW questions about myself (other than those above) that would bother me at all... I'm virtually impossible to offend.  

Hugs*
Nicole

CelticLass5347 reads

I sometimes have to watch what I discuss with my gents. I have a tendancy to tell too much about myself but I have gotten better. *wink* I don't like to discuss other providers or clients and that is the one topic that bothers me with some gents. There are alot of ladies in this business that really admire and care for but have no idea what their services are like. I dislike listening to someone tell me stories of ladies and how bad the session was. It makes me uncomfortable. I never know what to say and always try to change the subject.


Usually by the time I do see someone we have built up some sort of dialouge and are comfortable talking on a variety of subjects. I like to listen and find out if we have anything in comman. Because more often than not, my appointments are like "dates", With someone I find interesting and charming and when the subject of business (i.e. "how busy are you?" "Have you seen anyone else today?" ect.ect.) bring back the part of this that I would rather leave in that envelope on the desk.

Honestly I didn't date much before I started doing this so my encounters are like blind dates and it's always exciting for me. And after seeing someone for a certain amount of time it is like seeing an old lover. I like it that way and it brings a fair amount of passion and intimacy to our time together. And after that amount of time you really get to know one another as people and not just as provider/client. So as I ramble on with this...LOL...I guess certain questions are best left up to the lady and how well you know her. And if its a brand new experience just let it flow and natural and business questions are best left for another time, if in fact they ever come up.

xoxoxo
Lass

Celticlass said"
"I dislike listening to someone tell me stories of ladies and how bad the session was. It makes me uncomfortable. I never know what to say and always try to change the subject"

But this is no different than any other man/woman relationship.  Women simply do not like to be compared to other women.  Don't do this guys!

celine3776 reads

I find that pre-screening and a few back and forth emails prevent those questions from being asked on our first in-person encounter.

Having my own upscale, private incall, my first goal is to make you feel as comfortable as possible in the first few minutes of our meeting, so I am going to be tuned in to you...are you reserved, nervous, friendly, outgoing, etc.  

I usually initiate the conversation.  How I respond to you and and what type of conversation I usually generate, depends upon how I sense your present mood to be...from shy and reserved on one end to outgoing and confident on the other...and all the inbetweens.  I love them all!  I choose the subject matter accordingly...again, your absolute comfort is my main goal here.  I tend to focus on positives, such as hobbies, interests, sports, travel.  Many of these I have already come to know from our prior email exchanges.  I also like to make sure my guest knows upfront that I consider our time together as "playtime" and that I enjoy playtime as much as my guest!

I do not need to know about your personal life and your work, unless you feel compelled to discuss certain things; however, I won't discuss mine in great detail, either.  Hey, it's all about playtime...you and me...and after 10-12 minutes of conversation, it's time for me to move things along, stick my tongue down your throat and...well, you get the picture!

In case you haven't figured it out, I absolutely do not mind taking the lead!  Take care...xoxoxoxo...Celine

To those wonderful ladies who responded both here in this thread and by PM, Thanks!  You give great insight into our relationships.  I would encourage those of you who sent PM's to share your comments here as well.  You have a lot to say.  Thank you!

SexyCurvesDC5086 reads

Answer however you feel comfortable answering. You can say a) Yes, I've seen SexyCurvesDC and she was wonderful, and also... (hehe!)  or b) No, I'm awfully busy and I don't get a chance to play much... or c) I'd rather not say.... then change the subject to something YOU are more comfy talking about.

I have had clients tell me both good and bad experiences they've had with other ladies, and I don't MIND... it's not like I'm jealous ==:O When I hear about bad experiences I feel horrible for the guy and it makes me all that much more determined to blow his mind completely with how much fun he'll have with me... :)  If I hear a good experience, that's ALSO nice because I now know that another lady is just as reputable and serious about her business as I am and works hard to provide good experiences for her clients. So either way, I'm happy with whatever you want to share or don't share.

As for whether I personally ask, sometimes I do and sometimes I don't... for some people being involved in this hobby in their community really and truly places them IN A COMMUNITY... with parties, get togethers, etc... one they love to talk about (not in a bad way) and share with others of their community. "Hey, didn't I see you at so and so's party? Wasn't that a fun night? Didn't so and so look GORGEOUS?"  For some it is more clandestine... :) Either way it's all good! :)

Hugs*
Nicole

Cheridan3914 reads

I find the questions about how many appts do you do or am I the first or am I the last appt. to be awkward.  As already stated quite well by Nicole there is no right answer.  It filters through my reviews that I'm conversationalist.  I do ask numerous questions all the while sharing things about myself as I go.  Being a researcher I pose questions that I hope will yield meaningful insight as to the special person who has picked me out to spend some special time together.  I think I was blessed and further heightened by courses I took in college to be able to put people at ease.  It is imperative for the session to be a successfully delightful time that you put your guest at ease.  I do on occassions ask about if they have ever had a bad experience or what would make a session less than satifactory.  In the beginning I knew very little about protocol and most the information I had was very poor about how this all worked.  In the begining I was in constant refinement given the answers gentlemen shared.  I still ask once in awhile because there is always the possibility I haven't heard every possible negative.
I have never ask anybody for a blow to blow layout of a bad appt.
Just share the highlights so I can make sure I don't possibly ever do something that might be undesirable.  I'm like Nicole I'm pretty much an open book and even if I get ask those couple of questions we rather not.  I've learned to field them gracefully.

Here_to_help60 reads

I love discussing sports, guns, cars, our economy, etc to break the ice or during our intermission.

Tippecanoe54 reads

Holy crap, how did you find this thread from 16 years ago!  Yikes

Here_to_help54 reads

I couldn't help myself. I wanted to do a comparison. Look at how many people use to check out our posts back then versus now.

Tippecanoe10979 reads

Yes, interesting. I see how it reads for the original poster, but how does subsequent post counter work? If you look at other threads, it shows like 800 views, but when you go into the thread, subsequent posts shows 2 or 3 "reads".

But yeah, you're right, the drop off is huge. I see similar things on other boards, though. People have moved to FB, Twitter, etc.

I am pretty open to whatever the gentleman wants to chat about.  If it is a first date I do like to discuss some general personal info, just like a regular first date! Work, relationships, kids, pets, hobbys, etc.  (I am a provider that does share personal info about myself and I have no issues doing so. )
 I do like some general info as to how long you have been in the hobby as well as some girls you have seen.  I do like to know this because how someone describes past relationships/providers does indicate quite a bit what type of person you are!!!
I am a pretty open book so not much that is a really off limits topic or me.  As long as you are kind, courteous, and respectful I am fine.  

Tippecanoe58 reads

LOL

Posted By: BarryWright
Re: nice
nice necro bump

...sure, I'll play in the boneyard ;)

What we discuss rather depends on the provider and how much time we've spent together. If it's a first session, the conversation tends to be rather generic, with no specifics. Just enough talk to break the ice, get a feel for someone's ability to hold a conversation and see if they can relate to me.

On the other side of the equation, one of my faves and I spent 20 minutes yesterday discussing metalworking, blade geometry and custom katanas. All while sipping champagne and getting warmed up. We also share a love of natural history, rockhounding, SCUBA and skiing, so there's a lot for us to talk about. We also discuss some of our other adventures and who might be a good candidate for our next 3some.

Once we're in bed, things flow organically and we continue the communication, albeit on a more visceral level. She brings out the e-stim machine, are we going to use the strap on today and then we riff a role-play scenario. Damn! 2 hours can sure fly right along.

And that's why she's one of my faves and I travel 250 miles one-way to see her.

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